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8Ares8

PostPosted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 2:03 pm


Well I'll be blatant I have a problem making relationships with girls, that is actually dating because whenever I try they take me like I want to be just a friend and you don't want to hurt something like that. But I don't like being straight forward or rash and I never want to just go into a relationship after a girl breaks up... but the past 2 girls that I liked and I was about to ask them when I found out they are dating someone else... this is a bummer like most of you know and this also makes you stay"just a friend"...

any advice?
PostPosted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 6:56 pm


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_________Cause nobody wants to be the lst one there
_________And everyone wants to feel like someone cares
_________Someone to love with my life in their hands
_________There's gotta be somebody for me like that


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I see your point here.
I'm having a smilimar problem, but with guys.
From a girls point of view (that would be me, obviously)
When I meet a new guy, I always look at him to see if I could ever see myself with him. I don't just see looks, I see personality. Does he have sinilar music taste/can he make me laugh/is he trustworthy/what are his hobbies/what crowd does he hang out with/will he fit in with my friends/etc...
About going into a relationship after a girl breaks up with someone. Don't go for it right away. It seems like a desperate move. Instead, be there for her as a friend. Comfort her. Say things like "I don't understand why he let you go, you're so much better than him anyway" etc. Girls like sweet cheesy things like that.
(Well, at least I do. XP)
If they're dating someone else, then just be a friend. Be their shoulder to cry on. That way if something happens, they can know that you've always been there for them even when you didn't need to be. It shows that you're gonna be there in the future especially when she DOES need you to be there.
I don't know how much my rambling helped you, but that was my helping.
Hope it works. smile
heart


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Cause nobody wants to do it on their own _________
And everyone wants to know they're not alone _________
Somebody else that feels the same somewhere _________
There's gotta be somebody for me out there
_________
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sandflea


Bloody-Melons
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 10:24 pm


-points up- Excellent advice. I have nothing to add. ;] Just wanted to post for the hell of it. Woo~

-Mel-
PostPosted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 3:30 pm


ok no offense to these two that posted i kinda got pissed, but that was because I was not specific. There is this one girl. I have liked since I first saw her when we were kids... but recently I've decided to try and move on... but it's still nagging at me. So I want to ask her how she feels about me, but I don't want to loose her on the level of being a friend what do I do?

8Ares8


Rekka Atsuma

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 02, 2010 7:25 pm


oh man a certain girl and you're unwilling to sk just to get a 'just friends' reply?

okay, this advice may not be what you want but:
Best Advice EVER for this situation coming right up:



If you are in high school, then you really should stop hunting for a GF/BF until you're older.

I'm engaged, and i can tell you, it wasnt until 08, one year after graduating HS that i even got my first GF, and like you, i'd known her and wanted her romantically for a good long period of time (known her since 02, wanted her as GF since 05)

I'm fixing to marry her (it's now 2010, thats 8 years) and i've known her 8 years but only dated her 2.5 of those same 8 years,

if youre above high school, (COLLEGE OR HIGHER) ask these questions:
can you support a girlfriend, can you support a child, can you support a family, can you literally say that you know her 100%?

---if any one of those above questions is answered with a "no", then hold off until you can say yes to each and every one of them

Jess(my fiancé) and i are just now looking for an apartment, and our wedding is still at least one year (September 2011, earliest) away, even then i'm gonna move into the apartment on my own, establish it, then after the wedding she'll move in,
Jess and i both know each other so well, that if you mention one word the other has to either, then we'll instantly think of them
All i'm getting at is there's just a bunch on the line here, Girls say the wanna be firends because being firend is where your romance can build itself

Jess and i, we're friends before anything else, we're both followers of christ, and yes we do put our faith above even our friendship, but then we're friends before we're lovers...
thats why they say 'lets just be friends',

and if a guy cant handle that, i personally have to ask how he thinks he can handle a wife, because without friendship any romance is just bound to die out.
PostPosted: Thu Jun 10, 2010 8:38 pm


Being just the friend is a tough spot to be in, especially when you hold feelings that are so much more then just "friends".
Unfortunately this sort of thing happens a lot. This advice coming from a girl who constantly faces this sort of problem. I meet guys who have feelings much greater then mine, and while I just see a friendship before me, they see relationship. Pushing at the topic and asking how another person feels, can ruin a chance at both though.
Being the friend gives time for you to learn about the person, and if by chance you learn something about that girl that you don't much like and can't over look at least you two can be friends.
I strongly believe that we all have a special person out in this world for us alone, keep looking but be patient, take your time. Hasty choices won't make finding true love any easier, and I think the best relationships can start just by being friends with each other.

Hopefully this helps.

Silver Tiger Lily

Beloved Star

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