Malika'eusi spends some time alone and thinks about her life and what she looks to in the future.
The mostly white female heaved a heavy sigh, things just weren’t the same in the Pridelands since Sekizen had disappeared from her life. Even the joy of children, her second chance to raise her children right, could only tide her over for so long. Already they were blossoming adults with a future all their own, something she was envious of. She had done so many things that she had once thought right only to find that they were flawed.
She shook her head, things were difficult. When she was a young, just a juvenile, she had come across the male Nyekundu who talked of giving her a home, something she had always dreamed of and sought and she followed him blindly. Even when his true nature began to be known she still put her faith in him because it was the only thing she knew to do, the only thing she could think of doing. She didn’t want to lose her home.
When he talked about furthering the members of his pride she gave into him, allowing him to impregnate her with the promise that he would be there not only for his future children, but her as well; she had fallen for the pride’s seer and he had disappeared on her, another pain on top of the one left from her mother leaving her and she wasn’t sure she could handle any more of it.
Unfortunately her faith in the salmon-striped proved to useless as he went off and did something that got himself killed and as a result he abandoned her, another pain she couldn’t handle so without thinking she ran off in a panic that led her to accidently abandon her recently born litter.
Something she had never forgiven herself, nor had it appeared had one of her daughters. Zaaga’Tamanio who had sought her out and almost attacked her. The anger, hurt and betrayal she had seen in her daughter’s eyes hurt her more than any of the abandonment she had suffered.
No amount of apologies could ever make up for the problems she had created for the green striped female. At least now the two had come to an agreement.
Now, now Malika had come to a decision that effected not only her but her children that lived in the pridelands. She was leaving and she didn’t know if she would return. She needed some time to herself. She had some soul searching to do.
Which was what lead to her leaving and venturing out once more to the rogue lands. She didn’t regret leaving, not in the slightest bit but at the same time she felt a ting of homesickness. The pridelands had become the closest thing she could have called home. Yet she felt as thought she could no longer remain there, not when everything reminded her of the white lightning marked male and it hurt her to think about him.
“Sekizen...where did you go?” She mumbled sadly settling down on her stomach and resting her head on her paws. There was much to think about and so little time. “I miss you,” she sighed shaking her head. There was no time for such thoughts, if she continued to linger on the bad she would not be able to move on when the time came. This was not the first time her heart had been broken nor was she certain would it be the last.
One day she was certain she would find that happy ending but when, well that was something she was not. “So much searching to do...” She whispered closing her violet colored eyes and settling down to sleep. She would continue the next day.
She had much to reflect on in the upcoming days.
