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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 6:28 am
It was a question that Serenade Soriano, the piano playing sweetheart of Barren Pines, would sooner or later ask, although many of her schoolmates might be doubtful as to when she would actually understand this concept. There had been quite a few people; boys and girls alike, who had flirted with her, winked, dropped sugary sentences, but it all resulted in the same thing. Serenade. Did. Not. Get. It. She absolutely had no clue; she treated everyone as either an acquaintance or a friend that was being nice to her.
And so, when Serenade was faced with the dilemma of 'What is love?', she was clueless. She had google'd it, wiki'd it, and she still didn't understand. An emotion couldn't possibly be written out in words!
It was then an idea sprung into her head and she immediately left the dorm, wandering the halls in search for someone, anyone, who could explain it to her. It wasn't easy however; most doors were shut and Serenade was afraid to knock on them in case she bothered someone.
The question most would ask if they knew she was looking for an answer to such a question, was 'Why?', and it was not hard to believe that Serenade was doing this for her music. Everything she did seemed to revolve around music; even the recent hobby of gaming she had picked up was because she thought the soundtracks sounded wonderful. And now, said soundtracks were causing her problems, as she was currently learning a song written specially for a romantic theme between two characters in the game. She had tried to play it but had gotten frustrated. What kind of emotion was she supposed to put into the song?
Scores clutched in her hands, she entered the Barren Pines theater, hoping to find a certain attractive drama teacher about. If not, she could always use the piano there as practice until Miss Johnson appeared.
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 6:57 am
Fortunately for Serenade, Miss Johnson was indeed in the theater auditorium, her back turned from the entrance as she studied the stage before her. She had just finished with the morning's theater class and was now mulling over the stage, and how the setup for Act Two of Nia, Princess of Love was to be staged.
She'd spent hours working on this play, hours upon hours writing and designing concepts and the storyline which she could so terribly relate to. After all, it had been written about her, not that anyone would know any differently. It was exhausting work, far more work than she'd have ever guessed, but it was satisfying to see things coming together. The turnout for the auditions had been smashing, and it wouldn't be long before rehearsals could begin.
The tell-tale sound of the entrance door squealing alerted Ursula to the fact she was now no longer alone in the theater. Turning around, notepad still in hand, she watched to see who would be coming down the aisle.
"Yes?" she called out, curious as to who it could be for she hadn't been expecting any appointments until her next class. Could it be Obsidian, here to rag on her again for her play? "If that's you, Drew dear, you may as well turn back around, I'm not interested in anything you have to say."
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 7:07 am
It was lucky then, when Serenade pushed open the door to the auditorium, and was greeted with Miss Johnson's voice. A smile began to grow on her face, and eyes lit up excitedly as she stepped in shyly, wondering if it was really okay to approach a teacher with this sort of question. "U-uh, Miss Johnson, are you expecting someone?" She asked, scores clutched to her chest, looking utterly bemused.
"I..if you are," Serenade was always rather intimidated about approaching teachers, although she thought the world of them, "I won't bother you." The girl stood there awkwardly, shuffling her feet. "I really really have a problem though." Lips pursed, the girl looked as though she was about to cry, because if someone like Miss Johnson couldn't help her with her dilemma, who else could? Her schoolmates were all just teenagers like she were, and didn't properly understand what love was, she was sure. But for someone as mature and pretty as Miss Johnson, she would certainly have the answer, right?
Serenade didn't know who else she could turn to.
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 7:22 am
A student with pale green hair appeared from the other side of the door, and a small wave of relief came over Ursula, knowing she wouldn't have to deal with yet another argument over the fact that Sir Igneous Blackglass was indeed quite the developed character that suited the role for Nia's unrequited love. Some men just didn't understand these things, frankly.
"Not at all, dear." She answered back, never moving from where she stood and forcing the girl to walk her way, if she wanted to hold the conversaton, "I just assumed it was Mr. Collins here again. He's such a tease, you know. Silly boys."
Absentmindedly flipping through her pages of notes in attempts to find a clean area to scribble a sidenote on, Ursula's hand froze in place as she heard the girl mention "problem". By the tone of her voice, no monster had found its way to her so it could only mean she had.... teenager issues.
Oh god.
Eyes moved back up towards the young girl and she shook her head. "No, not a problem at all!" She assured her, lying through her teeth as she mustered up the best smile she could fake. Her hand waved over to the first row of chairs, and the older woman made her way towards them, taking a seat. Patting the one next to her, she waved the girl over. "Come on, tell me what's going on now. And I'm sorry, what was your name again, dear? I'm terrible with my memory, I fear."
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 7:30 am
The girl only nodded, her grip loosening on the file she held that contained her precious scores, giving Miss Johnson a timid smile, but a smile nevertheless. Things were going to be okay; the teacher wasn't busy at all! She mentally scolded herself for assuming such things and getting so emotional about this, but this concerned life and death. Serenade was utterly, die-hard, serious about her gift that had admitted her into Barren Pines.
She made her way down the aisle, seating besides Miss Johnson. "I'm Serenade Soriano, Miss Johnson. And oh, you might think I'm silly, that I'm overreacting about this, but," she started fiddling with the edge on the file that now lay on her lap, starting to babble, "s...see, I found a new song to play, but I don't understand the emotions that I should put into it. It's a song that's used as a romantic theme between two characters, y'see, and I don't know...I thought you would be the best person to explain this to me." From the way she spoke, it was clear she thought quite highly of Ursula in this aspect. She looked at her wide-eyed, hoping Miss Johnson would accede to her request.
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 7:50 am
The teacher gave the girl a quizzical look as the student whipped out a folder and began playing with it, her mind immediately thinking a huge <******** NO if this child was going to ask about homework assistance. Ursula had spent her own years at high school, toiling and moaning over the unfairness of schoolwork and what tricks she'd pull on any hapless nerds in the class to convince them to do the work for her. It had been troublesome, finding ways to cheat her way through passing, and she wasn't about to start trying to learn, much less teach, this s**t now.
When the girl mentioned songs, however, she found herself thrown off even further, and Ursula simply sat there, her mouth in a thin line, as she attempted to understand what the girl was trying to get at. Romantic things? Songs? Emotions?
"I'm sorry, sweetheart," She managed to say, still a bit taken back by the situation, "I'm not sure what you're trying to say. Are you asking me what... well, what love is?"
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 8:05 am
"Um." Serenade said, looking totally awkward. Perhaps she shouldn't have prattled on and on like that and laid things out calmly like she usually did, though it was hard to in front of people who held authority. She was always in awe, and the fact that she was rather shy didn't do any help either. "Y...yes."
"I'm sorry; I know it's a really really hard question for you to answer. But I don't quite understand, and I find it important in mastering a piece is to inject emotions into the song. There's a need for perfection, y'know? L...like how you want Nia, Princess of Love to be properly staged, right?" A fellow performer would understand her need to be perfect, she was sure.
"Basically, um...I guess I should explain the two characters the song is written for. The guy's from a mysterious place, meets the girl, and it's kind of like, love at first sight? The girl's interested in his past, and is the only one who believes his story. And then this other guy comes in and proposes to the girl, and she's forced to accept. The guy crashes the wedding, gets the girl back and they...kind of confess their love for each other. And...and...I really don't know how to explain the rest of the story." Honestly? Serenade's knowledge was mainly spliced from the wikipedia. This was all very confusing, but she was determined to go to whatever lengths that would help her deliver this song perfectly.
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 8:44 am
Her cheeks were tinged pink by this point, the question even more unexpected than the student's arrival. She wanted to know what Ursula thought love was? Unwed, single Ursula?
Thoughts of her past romances were quick to flood her mind, of the men she had dated, those who had tried, the very few that had eluded her. But would any of those fall under the category of love?
Heat flooded her face within seconds as her thoughts turned to the inevitable. Charonite. Were the feelings she felt for him something more than simple infatuation? She knew the answer, but remained silent, lost in thought as the girl awaited an answer from her.
Finally, she opened her mouth, hesitant, and then the words slowly began to spill out.
"Love... is a very strange emotion, I have to confess," she started, her legs shifting to move one over the other, attempting to move herself into a more comfortable position. "There are so many ways of expressing it, mostly because, well, there are so many ways of interpreting it."
Her hand lowered, her own fingers playing with the edge of her notepad paper. How did she interpret it? How did he interpret it? Surely he must have some opinion on it, right? "Some have a far more difficult time showing their feelings of love for something, or someone, while others are willing to show it in their actions, in their words and emotions. Nia... well, Nia was written with emotion, you're right. I don't think any work of art can be successful without part of the artist's emotional investment being put forward, being used in the artwork. Why write a poem about sorrow if you have no sadness to base it from? Why sing a song of praise when there's nothing to be thankful for?"
Her voice went quiet, finally, her thoughts turning to her own production, as the girl pointed out. Nia had been written with emotion, but did even Ursula fully understand why she wrote what she wrote? Was it to simply bring her daydreams to life? Was it her projecting her desire for a happily ever after? What girl didn't want a happily ever after?
"Your song," she returned to the conversation, "Your music has a story, but if you've never felt love, it's going to be very difficult to work with such a powerful piece. Is there nothing you love, Serenade? There is more to love in life than men.... could there be something else that you find yourself dedicated to, that you are willing to invest commitment in? What about your piano? I assume you like to play, right? But do you just like to play it, or do you love to play it?"
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 9:41 pm
If one thought about it, Barren Pines had many other teachers who Serenade could pose this awkward question to. She had struck out all the male teachers first; it was embarrassing as telling them about periods, and well, Serenade was terrified that the other teachers wouldn't understand her reason for asking this. It was about art. Music. Ursula Johnson had seemed to be her best option; she was in charge of the theater, and that was art, and she was pretty.
She nodded along to Miss Johnson's words, looking rather delighted that Miss Johnson understood. She understood the need for putting emotion in art, and that was all for Serenade to like this teacher and worship her.
"I do love to play it!" Serenade assured her, straightening her back and nodding fervently as an answer to that question. "It's just that...I always thought loving a person was different from being dedicated to your art. I've never been, y'know, romantically involved with anyone." Serenade had no clue that a few of her schoolmates had actually flirted with her; she thought of everyone as friends. It was only now that she was trying to grasp this concept that seemed very foreign to her. She winced. "I'm...really sorry at asking such a hard question."
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Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 6:41 am
She laughed softly, shaking her head.
"There's no reason to be sorry for," she assured the girl, and she truly meant that... well, for the most part. Above anything, Ursula was just relieved that she'd seemed to give the girl an adequate answer! "And you're right, it is different, but until you can experience it for yourself, then you can't really understand the difference, right?"
Her smile was genuine, her orange eyes meeting with the taller girl's. Despite surviving in a dog-eat-dog world, the theater teacher did indeed believe in the powerful emotion of love. It went unseen throughout her work in the Negaverse, but it was there, in some way, shape, or form.
"You'll know, at some point," the older girl confided, her fingers turning the page to her notebook, her eyes caring less what was on any of it as she spoke to the other girl, "Maybe not right off... well, usually not right off. Infatuation is temporary, like when you see a really fine guy walk by or a cute chick sitting across from you on the bus. Those'll come and go throughout your life. It's when you find that special someone that lights up your day that you'll recognize as being someone you love. Someone who you'll realize, at some point, means the absolute world to you, that you would do anything for without question or hesitance, that you may be willing to die for, even. Just a smile, a look, a nod... the smallest things you can get from them can make you happy, and as long as you know they're happy, then you'll be content."
Her smile was larger, the idea for love endearing to her. It was without question that she was romantic, thanks in part to her soap operas and trashy novels, so the topic of love, while scary, was also heartwarming.
Realizing she'd just been prattling off to a student, Ursula quickly caught herself and added, "At least, that's my interpretation."
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Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 6:52 am
She bobbed her head gently to Miss Johnson's words. It was rather sad that she would have to experience love, something her heart was in full charge of, and something she didn't know when would happen, to fully understand the difference between loving a person and the passion for one's hobby. Perhaps one day, she would understand, perhaps one day some boy would capture her heart and she would be happy. Maybe she had to be content with perfecting the technicalities of the song first.
She watched Miss Johnson beginning to speak passionately about the subject at hand, and though Serenade was oblivious to flirtation attempts, she wasn't silly enough to not see that Miss Johnson was truly speaking from her heart. She did know how love was like, at least she had her ideals about it.
"So," She said, with a gentle smile, "you have that someone you truly love in mind, Miss Johnson? It must be nice, to be in love, if he makes you feel happy."
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Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 7:25 am
The laughter bubbled up from within her at the absurd thought, "Haha, awww, no I can't say that I ha-"
Wait.
Her mouth hanging open, she paused mid-sentence, her own words coming back to haunt her, stopping her. Could she...?
No.
Nooooo no no no.
Closing her mouth, she thought over what she'd just told the girl, as opposed to her current relationship predicament.
That you would do anything for without question or hesitance... check.
That you may be willing to die for... check.
Just a smile, a look, a nod... the smallest things you can get from them can make you happy.... check.
As long as you know they're happy, then you'll be content... check.
Oh god, this couldn't be going where she thought it was going. There was just no possible way. She was in it for his power, she was in it for his position. She was a ladder climber and he was the top rung.. right? It was nothing but infatuation, a school girl crush.... temporary. A year's worth of temporary affection that was due to fade away at any point. Any time now.
The signs were clear, the truth was staring her in the face.
No.
No.
Ursula Johnson was in love with Gunn Killingworth.
"I... I-maybe?" She meekly stammered out, finishing her long awaited statement. Her cheeks were flushing as her mind attempted to digest this information. "It's... it really is different for everyone?"
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Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 7:45 am
Head tilted slightly in curiosity, Serenade merely kept quiet as Miss Johnson's voice died away and became lost in thought. Even for an adult, love didn't seem to be an easy emotion to explain, to comprehend, to fully grasp its definition. How could other musicians manage it to inject that sort of emotion into their songs then? It was a great challenge, and for once in her piano-playing life, she actually felt inferior, that she wouldn't be able to cross this hurdle.
"But basically, it's wonderful to be in love, isn't it?" Serenade pointed out gently. "I wish I knew."
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Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 8:01 am
Her thoughts were scattered by this point, the epiphany having shaken what she thought was her stable little know-it-all world.
"It's not always a bed of roses," she returned, not thinking, "Especially if the one you care for doesn't return the feelings."
She had to get out of here. She had to think, she had to prove to herself that she was wrong, that this wasn't what it seemed to be leading itself up to be. In love with Killingworth? Charonite? How was that even possible? The man was a ruthless killing machine, he cared for no one but himself and his agenda, so how in the ******** world could she have fallen head over high heels for the General-King and not realized it? Jesus Christ, this was just... it was just insane, that's what it was.
"You'll have to excuse me, Serenade," the orange haired teacher said abruptly, rising from her chair, "I'm afraid I need to prepare for the next upcoming class, but I hope that I was able to shed some light on your problem."
Her second class wasn't for several more hours. She just had to get away, think things through, laugh at the absurdity of the idea. No, this wasn't happening, no no noooo.
Nodding her head, she took off without another word onto the stage and disappeared into the back, no doubt to lock herself away in one of the many dressing rooms.
This... this was going to take a while to sort out.
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Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 8:18 am
Serenade stared. She didn't understand how someone like Miss Johnson could experience unrequited love; she was pretty enough to turn the heads of many boys in the school, so how could a man be not in love with her? It was puzzling, to her, at least. Love was really very strange.
She stood up after Miss Johnson did, bowing and uttering a soft "Thank you, Miss Johnson". Her answer had indeed cleared up some...things, but she was still undoubtedly confused. What had she been thinking; emotions were hard to put into words after all.
Serenade stood there for a moment, eyes following the teacher as she left, sighing at the predicament she had landed herself in. Really, maybe she should just stick to classical pieces. With that thought in mind, she headed for the door, and left, intending to return to her dorm room.
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