|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 9:41 am
 Xnah let out a deep scowl. Ignorance! She was tired of all this bullshit. Her son and daughter were well of age now and just as Ainsley left, Drodan, in her opinion, was way too much of a pain in her rear end. What did she do to the gods to deserve such hate? Her luck with family was about as good as her luck with trying to live underwater.
Frowning, the grey lioness tossed her head up in the air and dropped her body where she stood. She missed the days when she was a cub. She missed Duke and his teachings, she missed... she missed Liqui. She hadn't seen her old friend in what seemed years. She had well disappeared before Xnah had her litter, and now her litter were adults. It was bullshit. Complete bullshit that her friend had just left her without so much as a word to her whereabouts. Had she done something wrong? Did Liqui hate her now? Sighing once more, Xnah put her head between her paws and closed her eyes before she would let the tears fall that had been hiding in the back of her mind this whole time. She would be strong... and she would move on, she had to.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 10:28 am
Silently the two lions padded into the scene, father and daughter taking a stroll in the heat of the day, though they notable took a longer route to seek out shade.
His daughter wanted some solitude from the over whelming welcome and rejuvenation process that was steadily bringing her old self back. Though, Chagi let out a sigh, he'd never have his first born back... his bubbly little girl whom was the perfect picture of innocence. She been returned to him a shell of her former self but slowly she was putting on weight, building her voice again it just wasn't the same. He worried and cared for her, held her close at night during her terrors, in one way it was much like having cubs back around but in so many ways it wasn't. At least he had a place again but she was a big girl, and she had been aparently first to bore him grandchildren without his knowing and that made her an adult. Right now she was displaying the need to return to a quiet and lonesome spot, perhaps to think? Chagi wasn't sure but in a way he had hoped it would help, that as she'd asked she was starting to make decisions for herself again, that was good.
Walking with a noticeable limp the skinny lioness kept under any shade her father had found on their path. No words came to her mind nor did she feel the need to speak, so long she'd coiled into herself and now... Now she was finding it hard to come back. The fear that he would find her... find Tsu and Raz... Find her mother and father... her siblings... It was almost too much to live with, she'd caused to much trouble for her family and hadn't even the heart to warn them. She was sure her two offspring might, they'd made her so proud since they had freed her from the punishments. Coming to a spot she forced a smile at the edge of her maw, she recognized this spot, had her father bought her here for a purpose? She'd pleaded for some time on her own but something felt double sided, this place held memories for her, hadn't it? Nodding silently to her father she crossed through the vague patch of sun, her eyes closing as they pulsed in a burning sensation. Opening her eyes again she sniffed at the tree and looked about, her father was already leaving and she would be allowed time to rest, she'd probably only sleep anyway.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 10:36 am
A familiar scent began to rouse Xnah's most inner thoughts. With blinking eyes, she mused and her ears twitched back and forth until she finally stood up on her feet. What was that smell? Why was it so familiar? Stretching out, her tail whipped around, smacking the ground in an agitated manner as she moved toward the aroma. It wasn't long until she spotted the place it came from, and just as she ventured around the corner and saw spotted it her heart both fluttered and sank when she saw the condition the lioness was in, "Liqui?"
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 11:16 am
Nothing registered to Liqui till she heard her name. It hadn't crossed her mind that seeking some time alone would lead to meeting other lions whom knew her. Thats how it was now it seemed for as she looked at the lioness whom had addressed her she raised her head and blinked unable to piece the relevant memories together. Brows furrowing she kept searching, Liqui knew this lioness, she had flashes of memories like a rapid thunderstorm in her mind. Time where the two had laughed, had played, some times one would be upset and the other would do something to cheer the other up, yes she knew this lioness very well... So why couldn't see find a name...
As she carried on trying to think she tried to push herself up to her feet but faltered and landed with a heft thud. In her state it could of easily broken a rib with little fat or muscle in the way to cushion it, damn this state... As the dust and dirt settled around her she let out a sigh and looked away from the lioness. It was bad enough her family where seeing her like this, now her friends would too? She'd be a burden to them all like this... and whatever the name of this friend was... she didn't want her to see her like this, but inevitably it was too late.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 11:23 am
"Liqui?" Xnah's ears went flat against her skull as she watched the horrid display in front of her, as Liqui fell she flinched, her eyes closing for a moment. She was unsure rather to help or be angry over the fact that she wasn't told, that no one let her know that such a thing had happened to her best friend. Clinching her teeth, she gave a strut forward, almost a glare in her eyes, "What the hell do you think you're doing?!" She hissed in Liqui's direction, her eyes on fire for a few moments until she bent down, "Do you seriously think that you can get away without asking for help?" She nearly whispered, the fire now being lost as she gently nudged Liqui upward. "Isn't it what friends are for... to.. help each other?" Tears were nearly in her eyes at seeing her friend this way, the friend that she thought should never be hurt.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 11:35 am
As she listened she knew her friend was right, everyone was always right about her, Lucifer was right, Nema was right and now every member of her family whom fussed over her was right. She was useless on her own and was stupid to think she could lift her own pathetic weight, her mind began to swirl with Lucifers words and tears began to well. Fighting with herself she recalled Nema's words, and tried to cling to them he can't hurt you anymore, your safe now but there where still a majority of her that believed she'd deserved everything she had received in that cave and it was hard to listen to others tell her she was wrong about it.
As the tears rolled down her cheeks she forced herself to look at her friend, a quivered smile forming as she saw Xnah, that was it! Xnah was where threatening her too, she'd always been stronger, more controlled than Liqui so it made sense Liqui would cry before her. "Xnah...." Just saying her name flooded her with memories and feelings of all the encounters the two had shared, this lioness was more than a friend, she'd been her best friend. One thing most of all struck her harshly as she recoiled "You've never needed my help... And I.." She stopped it was hard to admit even in her crippled state, she'd leaned on Xnah for help and advice more times than anyone else.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 11:43 am
"Oh hush." She stated in more of a harsh tone than she meant to, though at the end of the statement the tone dissipated to a more cooing state as she brought Liqui closer to her and held her close, trying to make sure to not hurt her but also trying to let her know that she was there for her no matter what. "Liqui.." She said in softer tones, her eyes holding a concern for the female she was holding up, "I've always needed your help... to keep me going... to give me strength... to help stop me from turning into one of the most hateful lionesses... your purity... your innocence... made me what I am." Giving a soft smile, tears were now falling down her cheeks as she continued to hold her, not wanting to let go for fear she would disappear again.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 11:55 am
Something inside her reacted to the confession and curled as close to Xnah as she could possible get, enjoying the warmth next to her an honest warm from a person whom actually wanted her. Wasn't it?
A Jolt pushed her a few inches away from Xnah as the horrible thoughts rolled through her mind, Luci had said the same things, not the same words but in the same way, the same tone. He'd told her she'd been needed, in the beginning, that she was his reason to be and that she was what he desired the most. Taking control of her thoughts and replaying the memories she vetoed the idea of Xnah lying to her, her friend had never shown any sign of weakness, confessed to any of her more embarrassing feelings and this must be one? It was unlike her friend and that alone made it completely believable to Liqui, so she curled back in next to Xnah.
"In all the times I can remember..." Her voice was harsh and far deeper than other lionesses, a result of water deprivation and a voice unheard and unused for so long. "You've never been hateful. Xnah you had your eyes open to the world and I... I didn't.." She sighed and sucked in a sob, she couldn't continue. She was now a changed lioness, she'd been told she still held her warm heart, she didn't understand that but she did understand the world wasn't a big fun game where good innocent little girls didn't get hurt, whether the deserved it or not.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 12:05 pm
"Shhh..." Xnah watched her carefully as she left her side, not imposing herself as Liqui moved away but instead let her have her space. When she returned, Xnah gave a bright smile, pulling her closer and nuzzling her gently under the chin. "I could have become very hateful if not for you... and Duke. My family abandoned me, I was thought of to be a menace by everyone who met me... but the two of you." She spoke in gentle tones to try and soothe her friend but she was unsure how much help she was actually being. Whatever had happened to Liqui had obviously hurt the lioness very much, both mentally and physically which caused an anger to burn in Xnah's heart, but she wouldn't show it, at least not now, not in front of Liqui. "Liqui... there was... nothing wrong with you the way you were. You had a beautiful heart and your innocence... and playfulness... is what drew me to you." As she said this a very light blush painted her cheeks but she didn't turn away, instead she kept her eyes on Liqui but didn't allow herself to delve any further into those thoughts. She knew, just as she always did, that those feelings would never be requited with her. "You still... are just as beautiful as always.. there is nothing wrong with you now, you obviously went though a lot and you've come out of it. You're strong, and lovely, and you still have a big heart. You're still my best friend... and always will be."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 12:49 pm
Liqui found herself responding to Xnah's commands to hush or shss completely without question, had she only recently become such a sub or had she always been that way? The lioness hadn't spared it a thought merely stayed as close to Xnah as she could whilst she listened to all the nice things. Though hadn't her family accepted Xnah? She could see images of her best friend joining them for meals and a few other things and decided to just shake her head in response. Xnah could never be hateful, not as Liqui remembered it, this Duke person only brought a blurry memory to mind which made her uncomfortable so was quickly dismissed.
The observations about her old ways both confused and sparked a contradicting feeling inside her. There had to have been something wrong with her innocence and eyes slammed shut way of looking at the Isle and it's inhabitance. The male had picked on her weakness in that aspect and had lead to both the joys of her cubs and the pain of loosing two to evil and the pain. Still in debate as to whether she deserved it, it had still been a male and though her father, Nema who had rescued her, and both her brothers where nothing like him it made her wander. The idea of Xnah a life long friend becoming more so wasn't so far fetched now, a knight in shining armor just wasn't practical anymore, it was a dream for silly little girls and Liqui had sworn to herself to be everything she could. For herself, for her children and for anyone whom cared about her.
"I was rescued..." She pointed out, though Xnah had no way of knowing, Liqui knew she was trying to comfort her but still... it didn't feel deserved. "I've always looked up to you, you where my rock!" The exclamation on the last part made her cough but it passed and she carried on. "The way you see things... I need to learn, I love you Xnah, please teach me?" Looking up into Xnah's eyes with such a tear stricken and ill looking face only emphasis her plee. Her eyes had heavy shadowed bags and wrinkled in her fur that where far beyond her age.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 1:05 pm
"Liqui... I..." For once Xnah was now at a loss for words. She mused, frowning slightly as she took a step back, shaking her head back and forth. She felt a deep ache in her heart, she had always longed to hear Liqui say those words, but for now... it seemed wrong... oh so wrong.. and it pained her, instead of being a joyous occasion it felt more like someone had stabbed her right in the heart and left it to bleed. What was wrong with her? What had happened? There was so much she could tell she had missed, and she felt angry, angry at herself for being angry at Liqui for leaving, angry for the fact that she couldn't help, "I'm sorry Liqui... I'm so sorry... I'm sorry it wasn't me.. I'm sorry I wasn't the one to save you... it should have been me." She whispered in low tones, unsure of her own voice as her eyes could now no longer look at her friend, all she could see was the blur of tears that were brimming her eyes. "How can I teach you... I can try to teach you to be strong... but.. I can never restore you... I would more than likely taint you.." Her head finally whipped up, and though she still didn't believe what Liqui said, she felt as though the girl was at a loss and clinging to the only thing she knew. "I have always loved you Liqui... always... but.. I... can't take advantage of you like that... I won't.."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 2:18 pm
As soon as Xnah stepped away Liqui found herself flumped back with her head on the floor between her paws. What has she done? She'd reached out to the only and closest friend she knew and said the wrong thing. Of course Liqui had always been aware that Xnah didn't want a male, she'd told her many times and Liqui had always brushed it off, silly Xnah and her silly ways. Now it wasn't silly at all, it made complete sense that some lions or dragons chose to look to their own gender for loving support and happiness. Wasn't that what Xnah was and always had been for her? And the way she replied... it was obvious she'd been the same to her.
It wasn't clear the entire meanings, the understanding, love as such but she did know she needed Xnah right now more than anything. Liqui needed her friend back in any form, to be with her to treat her like... a friend and not an invilid so that she herself could go about rediscovering herself, Loving Xnah or not. Had she just thrown that all away?
It was beginning to feel like the tears would never end in this reunion when she dared to look back to the grey lioness trying to catch her whispered words. "Please stay, Love or not I still need you... I don't want to be fussed over, you've always been my equal... It's been so long..." She wiped her noes on her paw and lowered her gaze. "Xnah please....Just... Just you here... I remember so much.. I'm thinking so many things, feeling so many things." Even her voice was husky now showing she'd not spoke this much in a long time... probably not since she got back home. "You... No-one... No-one knew..." She trailed off and found her head meeting the floor again, this was all taking a lot of energy bursts she wasn't used to using. In a way it was exhilarating to push herself but in other ways she had beginning to ache, her eyes where feeling heavy and her throat felt like it was being grated.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 2:28 pm
"Liqui..." It was about all she could manage to say at this point. It was taking a lot of her to be doing this but she knew it was taking that much more out of Liqui. "I won't leave..." She stated, slinking herself quickly toward Liqui and wrapping her paws around her, trying to offer as much comfort as she could. "I know you need me, and I know that need is great, and so... that's why.. I can't take advantage of you, not in this way. I will be here, I will continue to be here, as a friend.. as anything you need of me Liqui, but I will not use this as a way to take what I want, no... this will be about you, what you need, what you want... not me." She stated this with tears flowing down her eyes. A part of her could kick herself for refusing, but she had come to terms long ago that Liqui was meant for better things, better than even her. "I am here... for you... always... in whatever way... until you no longer need me. No matter what that means for me..." Her arms kept Liqui close, trying her best to comfort her, to let her know that she meant every word that she said.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 3:02 pm
As soon as Xnah had moved close and wrapped a paw around her, Liqui had taken the invitation and gotten as close as possible to the other lioness. It didn't take effort to keep her wings slack, she rarely had the energy to use them, and as her family told her wouldn't use them again for a long while. There where more important things to build back up first, walking on her own, moving smoothly, talking, thinking and the such like, they where of course right, flight was a luxury for the lions of this Isle that half of them didn't appreciate.
But back at the moment Liqui was having trouble keeping her breathing under control from all the sobbing but it felt good to get just the smallest bits of information and emotions out in front of her friend and to be accepted for them. "Thank you Xnah. I need... I need my best friend back." She smiled into Xnah's fur and hoped that she'd feel it. It was true, more than anything she needed to be herself and have fun whilst getting back to whatever herself was these days. Then maybe she'd find the confidence to do the rest of what she needed to do.
"I'll always need you silly, a girl can't be without her best friend..." And just for that moment despite the change of voice and circumstances it almost sounded like the old Liqui. Back in the days the two would waste the day away together exchanging this and that and just generally having fun. With that she closed her eyes to enjoy the warmth and secure feeling of being with Xnah, she always felt safe with her. Whenever they met knew people, Xnah was a step ahead, whenever they hunted or played, Xnah was more knowledgeable and had the clevers.
With Xnah, her recovery seemed so much more closer than she'd imagined, she'd wanted to jump for joy but... that was just stupid. So instead she nuzzled into her friends side under the shade of a harboring tree under the sunny Isle day.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 3:11 pm
"Always." Xnah stated, her eyes on her friend as she nuzzled gently against Liqui's ear. ..I'll always love you.. She finished in her own mind but didn't dare say it aloud. It wasn't what Liqui needed, and though the lioness might convince herself it was, she knew it wasn't want Liqui wanted either. Somewhere, even if it was deep inside, Xnah still believed that Liqui wanted, needed, that knight in shining fur that she had always talked about. And well, Xnah knew she would never fit that bill, especially since she couldn't be the one to rescue her when she needed it the most. So instead Xnah knew she had to do her best to bring Liqui back, to make her strong and help her be carefree again. Whatever it took, so that she could find the one she always had wanted, even if it would never be her. And it never would be, she had to keep reminding herself of that.
"Like I said before.." She stated gently, lifting her paw under Liqui's chin so the girl's beautiful teal eyes would look into Xnah's own dull brown ones, "I will be here, for you, always. You won't be without your best friend, not even when we're old and have mates of our own, and our children are old." Giving a smile, it may have been weak but it was the best she could manage under these circumstances. "I'm yours Liqui... to use however you would wish until you're back to your old self, or new self... whichever gives you the strength to smile and laugh again."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
![[x~Ripple~x]'s avatar](https://a1cdn.gaiaonline.com/dress-up/avatar/ava/d5/dc/4aff894cfdcd5_flip.png?t=1434803654_6.00_01&a=1&i=10114863&s=stand&f=front)
