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 Posted: Thu Aug 20, 2009 2:33 am
I asked my nephew, who is four, whether he liked puppies or kitties better. He said he liked his all his pets the same...he doesn't have a dog. A few months ago, his dog was put down due to age. He used be my dog, poor KC was almost as old as me. emo
The thing is, no one told him that we had to put down the dog. My sister told him that the dog was sick and had to go to the hospital. At least three months later, he still thinks his dog is at the hospital. When he told us this, my sisters and I all looked like we were going to cry. How do you tell a four year old you lied to him and his dog isn't coming home from the "hospital"?
If it had been a person, I think you'd obviously tell a kid the truth. But how?
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Posted: Thu Aug 20, 2009 3:57 am
"He grew too old and ill, and had to go to a special place. You may not be abel to see him for a while. Perhaps some day, you will be abel to play together again."
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Posted: Thu Aug 20, 2009 6:06 pm
Isn't that the point of pets?
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Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 9:56 am
Gakre "He grew too old and ill, and had to go to a special place. You may not be abel to see him for a while. Perhaps some day, you will be abel to play together again." Instilling a false hope of heaven does not, to me, seem to be the best way of explaining death to a child.
When my uncle died, my sister was three. Our chosen method of explanation was to show her a chicken we had bought at the grocery store, and explain that when something dies, it's never coming back. The body is still there, but the soul and the life are gone. Everything and everyone has a time and a place to die. And, maybe, you might be able to see them again in Heaven when you die.
We then proceeded to eat said chicken, and she understood quite well.
The point is to make it something the kid can relate to. He can't relate to a person or a pet dying if he's never experienced it, but eating meat (if he is indeed a meat-eater; I know that you are not, but don't know the habits of your family) is something that is mostly commonplace.
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Posted: Tue Sep 01, 2009 9:17 am
Tabihito Gakre "He grew too old and ill, and had to go to a special place. You may not be abel to see him for a while. Perhaps some day, you will be abel to play together again." Instilling a false hope of heaven does not, to me, seem to be the best way of explaining death to a child.
When my uncle died, my sister was three. Our chosen method of explanation was to show her a chicken we had bought at the grocery store, and explain that when something dies, it's never coming back. The body is still there, but the soul and the life are gone. Everything and everyone has a time and a place to die. And, maybe, you might be able to see them again in Heaven when you die.
We then proceeded to eat said chicken, and she understood quite well.
The point is to make it something the kid can relate to. He can't relate to a person or a pet dying if he's never experienced it, but eating meat (if he is indeed a meat-eater; I know that you are not, but don't know the habits of your family) is something that is mostly commonplace.
I think that's a very good way to tell a child.
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Posted: Tue Sep 01, 2009 11:21 pm
Gakre "He grew too old and ill, and had to go to a special place. You may not be abel to see him for a while. Perhaps some day, you will be abel to play together again."  question
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Posted: Wed Sep 02, 2009 5:16 am
Way to be a downer, Val. That comic makes me want to cry... The poor guy loses his wife and two sons all in one day! crying
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Posted: Wed Sep 02, 2009 2:52 pm
Little Miss Fortune Way to be a downer, Val. That comic makes me want to cry... The poor guy loses his wife and two sons all in one day! crying Well... it is supposed to be a depressing comic >.<;; Sorry emo
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Posted: Fri Sep 04, 2009 4:33 am
Death. I wasn't kept from anything but fire when I was younger.
My dog Patches: Ran away and died of cancer.
My fish Tabi: God stuck in a blender and turned into red soup.
My cat Penelope: Hit by a truck.
My guinea pig Neji: Died from heartbreak.
I've also watched horror movies when young so I've developed some raving paranoia now.
If I ever have children I'll tell them the first pet that dies. Or if I die... my significant other will have orders in my will to tell them that my body ish decaying under six feet of dirt now.
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Posted: Fri Sep 04, 2009 8:08 pm
Eh, that is a tough topic to tackle. :/ My 12 year old rabbit died two years ago, and I held it and watched it die. I have to say, that is probably one of the saddest things I have seen, but I think it kind of helped me grasp the idea of death and such more clearly. Mot to sound cliche, but you just have to look at the good parts of life the creature/person experienced, as opposed to the fact that you lost them.
If it were me, I would tell the child that the animal had passed on and just let them cry it out. That's what my parents did for me when my grandfathers passed on, and while it hurt badly at the time, you eventually tolerate the loss and continue on with life. And honestly, I don't think sugarcoating the whole situation with the whole "you will see them one day" thing will help the situation, because I know it certainly did not help me.
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Posted: Sat Sep 05, 2009 12:43 am
Valheita Gakre "He grew too old and ill, and had to go to a special place. You may not be abel to see him for a while. Perhaps some day, you will be abel to play together again." I'm sorry but i laughed at that
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Posted: Sat Sep 05, 2009 10:27 am
Daryl-san Valheita Gakre "He grew too old and ill, and had to go to a special place. You may not be abel to see him for a while. Perhaps some day, you will be abel to play together again." I'm sorry but i laughed at that I found that funny too. xD
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Posted: Sat Sep 12, 2009 8:39 pm
Val's comic actually has a sense of truth though. Some kids who don't understand the meaning of death and are told about the "They've gone to a better place." story might end up that way. Some kids are pretty desperate in situations they can't comprehend. Still, it depends on each individual and their mentality in this world. In light of that, it all depends on the mentality of the person that needs such an explanation about the death of their loved ones. Though I learned that all by myself, the same with everything else. My parents have never taught me anything other than how to speak chinese. So....Yeah..........
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Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2009 8:33 pm
I learned about death about....3 years of age <_< And I came out fine....I was like "Oh well, If I die I'll go to heaven" and that's when I was THREE-today
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Posted: Wed Sep 23, 2009 12:24 pm
Wow, how sad.
This may be truly bizarre- but my recall of learning about death stems from living next to a cemetary my G-pa was the caretaker of, and I played there ALL THE TIME in the Cemetary!! THEN, we move from that part of the country, and at 5yo, my Uncle here is a Mortician. The Funeral Home is the ground floor of their 4 story house (used to be the town hospital before they got it) and my 3 cousins lived there, with dead people downstairs. OF COURSE we were always sneaking down there to look at "the dead people". I don't know why it wasen't scary, maybe because we were young and it's just something that WAS. That was also before I was introduced to spook shows at the movies.
Maybe this is why my kids are so weird burning_eyes
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