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 Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2009 11:41 pm
AIM Log -- Krysin & Felyn
Hodari'Nafsi & Umoya'Igazi Umoya'igazi pressed her paw down against a small animal's head, holding it still as it tried to claw at her paw. Carefully she kept from pressing too much pressure down upon it, not wanting to waste its life just yet. She wore the pelt of her mother upon her head, which slipped out of place just slightly as she bowed her head. It was good to keep up with her practicing, and she couldn't help but be mildly curious as to the spirits' mood. The animal squealed, and with a sigh she unsheathed one claw and sliced open the animal's stomach. She spent the next few minutes observing the spill of innards, her claw lightly skimming over the wet mess, reading the signs.
Umoya frowned, because something was up. The spirits seemed to be just slightly displeased, and her eyes automatically scanned the insides again, pondering whether she had read them wrong or not. With an irritable, soft growl, she shoved the carcass off to the side and stood up. She'd have to find some other animal to repeat the process again, and see if the reading was right. It wasn't something she was truly worried about, since it seemed only to be a little disturbance, but it wasn't something she wanted to ignore as well.
She flipped her head back, the 'mask' falling back into its rightful place, and walked away from the small animal to find something else to capture.It was most certainly the longest walk of Hodari's life. How did one even begin to describe this situation, explain it to someone who had been there every day? Even if he had never divulged any of his deepest problems to Umoya, she had been there as a silent support for a long time now - even before they were mates.
And now? Now he was going to destroy everything.
It wasn't a hard guess to figure out where she would be. Well, at least what she would be doing anyway. Umoya had a taste for sacrificing, and practicing sacrificing when she couldn't have the real thing. He knew her 'hunting grounds' after so long, and as he spotted her in the distance, he felt his stomach start turning into knots. He really had to do this.
"See something wrong?" he asked slowly, brows drawn behind the mask he had once again picked up. She looked displeased at the readings, and he couldn't help feeling as if the spirits were warning her of his betrayal.She turned her head, and noticed Hodari headed her way. Umoya had no idea how mates were supposed to feel for each other, but she did feel something for the other lion. She had been able to confide in him, trust him, and enjoy his presence. Her seriousness didn't seem to bore him, and so they had fallen into an easy relationship. It wasn't deep, but it will still one of the more significant things in her life. She was fond of Hodari, in a way, and so when she looked at him she tried to not seem entirely unpleasant.
"Yes, but I may have seen wrong, or messed up the process, so I was going to try another reading." She paused, deciding to take a little time out of her business for Hodari. She had seen less of him lately, and was a little curious as to why he was seeing her now. His company was pleasant, too, and so she turned away from her path and closed the distance between herself and him. She sat, her tail curling around her thigh, her paw lifting to push her mask back so Hodari could see her face.
"I'm sure it's nothing, though, I didn't see anything that would indicate it was urgent. It was more like a minor upset." She shrugged her shoulders gracefully. "I haven't seen much of you lately. What have you been up to?""You should trust your readings more," he said slowly, sitting down near her (although he made a point of making sure she couldn't reach him easily if she got angry enough to strike him). He faced her, and as she pulled her mask up so he could see her face, he hesitated on doing the same - it was so much easier to hide behind his mask. He owed her that much though, didn't he? She deserved to be able to stare into his face with whatever she felt, throw it right at him without barriers. He wasn't a warrior, but he could be brave about this.
"The Spirits have a funny way of warning us about things," he muttered, reaching up to finally pull the mask further back onto his head so that she could see his face and eyes better. It was funny to him, that she would see a 'minor upset' mere moments before he came to tell her about this. A sad, awful kind of funny.
"That's actually what.. I've come to tell you about." In truth, he'd only been more busy, doing more work - it happened at times. The spirits seemed unsettled about something lately, and he'd been studying it a little more closely. Yet, if she had noticed it enough to ask him about it, perhaps it would give a backing to his story. If he could pass it off as the time he was supposedly with Tifu..
"I've been with someone else, Umoya. I won't sugarcoat it, I have more respect for you than that," he grimaced as he spoke, the lies tasting foul on his tongue. "She's having cubs, and I told her I'd do right by her." More lies. The Spirits would strike him down for this, he was sure. "I do, but there's no harm in double-checking." She assured him, but couldn't help but raise a brow as he sat down further away from her then he normally did. If he thought she wouldn't pick up on the little things, he underestimated her. Umoya wondered why he had done it, but in those few seconds she shrugged it off thoughtlessly. It wasn't something to worry over. She knew Hodari, but not completely and totally. It was a good, solid bond that they shared together, and Umoya trusted him.
"Hm?" That should have keyed her in immediately that something was up, when Hodari alluded to the fact that the Spirits had sent a form of a warning. Her gaze narrowed momentarily, before again it eased into a simple, almost pleasant expression. "I suppose they do." A wry smile pulled at her lips, and she tilted her head towards him, intent on listening to whatever he had to say.
And she froze. Her face was wiped clean of expression, the first sure sign that she was upset. For a few moments her mind whirled with thoughts and accusations, the strong urge to whack him across the face rising in her. What did he think she was? Did he honestly believe she was the sort of lioness that would be okay with him going off and cheating on her? No, he knew her better, that was why he kept his distance, why he seemed... wait, where was the guilt? She stifled the hard beating of her heart, the rage that made her blood boil, and told herself to calm down.
She stood, but made no motion to attack him. Instead her eyes narrowed, and refused to leave his face. They searched there for the tiny hints of the lie. Really, she knew Hodari enough that... he would never do this, not to her, not to anyone, really. He had more respect for her, and if he wanted to be with someone else, he would've ended things with her. "You're lying," she accused, voice hard, but not with anger. "Don't take me for being stupid, Hodari. You know you would be the last lion to do this to someone, your mate, even. So, then, I can only ask one thing. Who are you covering for?"
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Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2009 11:43 pm
He should have known better, he supposed. Umoya was an extremely observant lioness, she was trained to be. Not only that, she had spent a long while with him. She was probably one of the few lions in the pride that could pick up the small differences in his facial expressions - after all, she got a lot of practice with it. He should have known she'd see right through his lie.
"Umoya," he said, gritting his teeth as he shut his eyes and tried to erase the expression on her face from his mind. He supposed, in a way, it was comfortingn to know that she knew he'd never cheat on her, but in the end, he was still doing something pretty lowly. "It's Takatifu, but I don't know who the male is." It wasn't a complete lie - he at least told her half the truth, and that helped him feel more believable.
His eyes reopened to look at her, looking weary and tired, even as he stared into her angry eyes. "She wouldn't tell me. I suspect it might be a high-ranked warrior, maybe even an outsider." He frowned, shaking his his head, and causing his mask to slip a bit. He looked up, pointedly into her eyes. "She's afraid, Umoya. I know that's no reason to do this to you, but I'm afraid of what could happen as a result."
If he had held on to his initial lie, she may have eventually given in and not pursue the truth from him. He hadn't, and she was determined to see why he was so eager to ruin her reputation for the sake of another's. Essentially that was what he was doing, choosing someone else to save, and disgracing her. What would every other member of the pride think? They would think that she was weak for picking a mate who cheated on her. It was shameful and disgusting, and she was... genuinely worried what the members of the Mizimu would think of her.
"We'll be able to tell when the cubs are born who the father is." She would know. She would take one look at them and she would see whomever was their father in them. It would be bitter knowledge, but she was angry, she wanted to use it. "It won't last long, your charade... but for as long as it lasts... you do realize how this will make ME look? I'm a Haruspex, Hodari! You're sacrificing my reputation in favor of Takatifu's, your MATE." The anger creeped into her voice, her eyes flashing dangerously. She took a step forward, genuinely considering striking at him. He was going to destroy her reputation, it was too much of a risk for her to ignore.
"I'm glad you're willing to hurt me in this. I guess in the end this means you didn't like me as much as I believed. I know we weren't ever... a couple, but we were friends at the least, good friends. And you're willing to do this to me still? I won't be shamed, Hodari. I won't let anyone think me the lovesick fool, betrayed because she stupidly trusted someone. That's what it'll look like." Her mind was whirling furiously, trying to conceive of a way to save herself. Anyone else didn't matter anymore. Hodari didn't, not since he clearly cared so littlef or her.
He knew it would go badly from the start. Honestly, how could he expect it not to? He couldn't just waltz in, tell her he was leaving her for a female that didn't love him, a female that was having someone else's cubs, and expect her to be perfectly chipper about the whole deal. No one would be excited to hear this news.
"We look somewhat similar, this male and I, apparently. It was the whole reason it had to be me." He swallowed visibly as she stood up and took a step forward, fully expecting a slap in the face, but ready to receive it if that's what she intended. He deserved it. "We're hoping that will be enough, in the end, to keep up the charade." It was true - he and Sakata were both dark, with rather plain pelts. Then there was the hope that Tifu would always be more dominant in the appearance of the little ones. It was a stretch, but he hoped they could fool most of the pride - even if his sister would know. Even if Umoya would know.
"I'm doing it for the pride, Umoya," he countered, feeling worse for saying it even as it came out. He felt selfish, having Tifu at his side now, even if he knew deep down he was doing someone a favor. "If someone were to kill her in cold blood, it could anger the spirits - who knows what that would mean for the pride. Jealous mates are.. dangerous." He looked at her pointedly when he said this, wondering if he'd have to shield Tifu from her as well.
He didn't try to sound angry at her, or upset that she didn't understand. He sounded guilty, beaten, almost upset. "I'm willing to risk both our reputations to save the pride from a disaster." Selfish, selfish, selfish. He wanted Tifu, and a mate that he could love. He had always enjoyed Umoya's company, but he'd be lying if he said he didn't somewhat enjoy this twisted turn of fate.
He was being ridiculous, she concluded, and if this was what Hodari had turned into, she wanted nothing to do to him. But, she was not willing to be a sacrifice in this, she loved her pride, but if there was a way to avoid this fate, she would do it. She liked to consider herself valuable to the pride, she had never hesitated to give advice to younger lions, consult the spirits, and her readings were hardly ever wrong. She was a Haruspex, and a prideful lioness, and she would not stand for this. There was no way that she would, but the question now was how she'd salvage her own reputation.
"So, it's someone who's more than just a little important, and I doubt it's an outsider." He had narrowed down the list significantly, and he was a fool if he didn't think that Umoya would know who it was as soon as the cubs were born. She wracked her mind for an answer as to who the father was, and she didn't like the results her mind was coming up with. It wasn't pleasant, and Umoya was used to keeping dirty little secrets. Of course, she wasn't so sure Hodari knew that, and she really did have to salvage her own reputation from this.
The only way she could think of was if she looked more like a victim than a fool. "There are plenty of things I'm willing to do for this pride, Hodari, but if I can avoid it, and I can, I do not want to look stupid in front of my peers." She laughed, a bitter sound, and advanced on him, her walk predatory, gaze slightly malicious. "I'm not going to kill her, if that's what you're insinuating. I'm not a murderer." Performing sacrifices was different. She never wasted a life, and that to her was murder. She wouldn't harm Takatifu.
"I will know who the father is, Hodari, and I have a pretty good idea already of who he may be. So, here is how it will be. I will keep my mouth shut about this, but in return you will have cubs on me. You just said you are willing to risk your reputation, but mine can be saved by this, if I am victimized so much that they can only think of 'Poor Umoya, having such a treacherous mate' instead of 'Stupid Umoya for putting her faith in her childhood friend'. Once that is done, I don't want to talk to you again. Maybe later, but you're making me sick right now. I don't want you near the cubs unless I specifically say you can. For that, and no less, I'll go along with this."
He was pleased to know that she wasn't planning on killing Takatifu, and he looked more than a little relieved once she admitted to it, but as soon as he realized that wasn't her intention, he had to wonder what was. His brows drew down into a furrow, and his gaze followed her as she took a few steps towards him. He felt the urge to shrink away with that gaze on him, that laugh in his ears. She was formidable, he knew, and if he had been any other male he would have been astounded by the raw power in her - he would have loved it. He was impressed, and the darker part of him even felt mildly attracted to it in this moment.
"That's reassuring," he muttered, fighting to keep his facade in place now. When she made insinuations to the father, however, he had to bite back the urge to let surprise spring over his face and chase down the cold fear. If she could guess, especially when the cubs were born, any open accusation might ruin whatever chance he had of pushing Jini off with his 'ignorance'.
"You want what?" his words were biting, and for once, he almost seemed angry. He was already ruining his reputation, because no one else knew he'd never do this - not like she did. Now she wanted him to get cubs with her, his own true cubs, and actually have no hand in raising them?
"Umoya, that is beyond.." he trailed off even as he began to speak, a deep, tired sigh springing from his throat. What right did he have to tell her what was immoral? "Whatever you want," he finally admitted quietly, feeling the cold chill in his spine, the nausea in his stomach.
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Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2009 11:44 pm
She knew it, knew despite how adverse he was to the idea, that he would cave. He had no right to say no to her, especially when he wasn't risking himself with his move, when he was injuring her as well with it. No, he wouldn't deny her the only opportunity she had to keep her dignity, to be able to face her peers without being looked down upon. Hodari was, in the end, too nice of a lion to refuse her the only escape route she had. "It's the only option I have right now, Hodari," she told him, confident that he wouldn't say 'no' to her.
She almost purred, and might have, because she at least had won in this way. But, she still felt bitter, felt cheated by Hodari. There was really no happiness to derive from the situation. Umoya had never wanted cubs, hadn't even considered them seriously, but right now it was the only way to save herself. She wouldn't enjoy it, rather would only feel relief that she may have managed to salvage her reputation. "Then it is settled, you will be the villain in this, so that I may continue on as a respected Haruspex. Maybe one day it won't make me sick to think about you," and with that said, she stalked up to him, staring into his eyes for a few, long seconds.
The anger was still there, hidden underneath the mask that she now pulled down in front of her face. She wouldn't lift it for him again, wouldn't be foolish enough to pust her trust in him. "I suppose you will come see me when you are most ready? Sooner rather than later, immediately at best, so that it will be more convincing." She knew he wouldn't back out, Umoya had been his friend since they were cubs.
"The villain," he echoed, looking down into her eyes as she stared up at him. He felt hollow, empty - perhaps the facade he always tried to show had finally taken over completely for once. Or maybe he was just so overwhelmed that his mind was trying to save him from the feeling.
He reached up to pull his mask back into place, copying her motion. He would get cubs with her, and he would leave them. They would grow up without a father, watching him raise cubs that weren't even his own. He wasn't sure how they would feel, what they would think, or even what she would tell them.
"I'll come, I swear," he muttered, turning to look off into the distance for a moment. He would come to her, as soon as he came to terms with what he was doing. How many different ways could his life be turned around this day? With a frown, he pushed himself up and turned away from her, knowing he'd have to be back, and soon.
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