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 Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 1:22 pm
He'd said it would be alright. That they would manage.
But that knowledge didn't make things easier for the Pure, because she'd known from the start that she'd been wrong. Now, there was no helping it. She was in trouble and there was nothing she could do about it. Sakata had told her to hurry, to take a dark pelted male for a mate and pass the cubs for his, but Tifu didn't have it in her to lie.
Not about this.
Thus, she paced. Mostly because her only option was to seek a friend she'd known for a long time now, and... it just didn't feel right to ask such a thing of him. Still, it was the only thing she could, which kept her pacing up and down a small path that led to Hodari's den. Up and down the Pure paced, her body stopping every now and again as she paused to stare at her stomach; the tale tell signs of pregnancy were not showing yet, and she still had time, but it all just felt wrong.
She deserved it though. The spirits knew she deserved it.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 1:35 pm
"Tifu?" he called hesitantly, his yellow-orange eyes narrowing on her form as it paced back and forth up the path to his den. She looked nervous, which he would say was often quite unlike her. What did a lioness that could see the future have to be nervous about? Usually, he would simply wait for her to come to him, not wishing to make his concern over her too obvious, lest his deeper feelings for her also shine through. Yet, with the look on her face, he couldn't bring himself to stay rooted to the spot.
"Is everything alright?" he asked as he approached, slowly and unhurried, and trying his best to make his face as calm as possible. He was sure there was little harm in showing her his concerns, the problems that often plagued his heart, because he was positive that if he could trust anyone it was her. Unfortunately, she just happened to often be the problem in his thoughts.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 2:16 pm
His voice startled her out of her reverie, and the lioness jumped rather uncharastically, her body tense, her ears dropped, making her look like the proverbial kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar. As soon as she realised that Hodari had seen her, Tifu decided that she wasn't ready to tell him what haunted her. At the same time however, she didn't really want to turn around and run away, because something told her that that tactic was not going to work (it hadn't worked with Sakata - what was to say it was going to work with Hodari?).
Her gaze became glued to his, and she couldn't, for the life of her, form words. Instead, her mouth hung open, gaping, then closing before returning full circle by gaping again, "I... I-I..." for some reason, she had lately made it a habit of struggling with words - she was going to start working on that least people start thinking she was a complete and UTTER idiot. Closing her mouth, the lioness swallowed down saliva and tried again, but still words refused to form.
She looked like hell, honestly; very much a nervous wreck, and it was no wonder her brain couldn't seem to be functioning like it should, "I'm in trouble," she said suddenly, and before she knew what she was saying, her voice lowered to a whisper, barely audible, "I'm pregnant..." something about the way she said it though, made it clear that it was not a happy ocassion.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 3:05 pm
A brow rose curiously at the way she was so jumpy, trying to determine anything from her immediate appearance that would explain just what had her so edgy. There was no blood, no wounds, no tell-tale sign that explained anything as far as he could see. He caught her gaze and waited for her to speak, but even then all she said was a jumble, a stutter. It was beginning to hurt his head, not being able to understand what she wanted to get across to him, when all he sought was a little clarification.
"What kind of trouble?" he asked with a frown, furrowing his brows curiously, even as she began to spiral into more of a nervous wreck. Just as he was about to ask her more about it, that harsh whisper jumped out at him, and it might as well have been a shout for all that it jarred his mind. That was it, he'd lost her, someone else had finally come along and taken his sweet Tifu. It was a long moment before the tone of her voice even registered with him. If she were with someone else, why was she so panicked?
"Come inside," he said softly, shaking his head, as he threw a quick glance around them. If she was this upset over the pregnancy, if it was the reason she was acting this way, then it must be the result of something that shouldn't be talked about too openly. He nodded his head towards his den before he turned slowly and began the short trot back up there, his mouth set into a solemn line. Who had swept Tifu up into such a dangerous web?
"Now tell me what's wrong," he said, as he turned and sat, staring at her with bright, attentive eyes.
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Posted: Fri Jul 24, 2009 4:32 pm
The poor female couldn't help but fidget in place, still within the knowledge that she had done wrong, and that one sows what one reaps. There was little she could do but wince when her dear, old friend asked her what kind of trouble she'd gotten herself into, "The deep kind," she whispered with a hint of shame as she turned to follow him into his den.
Once the darkness of the den engulfed them, she felt marginally better and Takatifu threw the Vates a look of gratefulness. Then slowly, she took a deep breath in and let it out in an attempt to calm herself. Unfortunately, there was little she could do to calm her torn up nerves; how was she supposed to explain to him what had happened? Not to mention... with WHOM it had happened with? After all, Hodari was the Queen's brother, and while it was true he was a dear friend, Takatifu wasn't entirely sure he'd remain so after she told him what she'd done.
"I'm pregnant," she whispered again, her gaze dropping from his as she fidgeted in place, "I..." she stopped there and her eyes sought out his, though only briefly before they dropped again, "I... Sakata... and now..." gulping down saliva, she straightened up and coughed to clear her throat, "Sakata advised me to find a dark pelted male... to fool him into thinking they're his - but Hodari, I can't do that!" she turned to look back up at him then, "I can't possibly live such a lie for the rest of my life! I wouldn't be able to sleep at night! I barely can as it is!"
After her small outburst had died, her ears dropped, "He went back to the Queen, naturally, and this... I... I almost ruined it for him, for them, and I don't know what to do."
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Posted: Sat Jul 25, 2009 9:47 am
The news of her pregnancy was no easier to hear the first time than it was the second time, but he did manage to sit still and keep the boiling acid in his stomach down when she repeated herself. He nodded at her encouragingly, not even a flutter of an eyelid giving away his true feelings. It was a great act, perhaps his best to date. Always the ever concerned friend, the shoulder to be leaned on, but never what he really wanted to be.
"Sakata?" he said, and for once, his great resolve was broken. His voice was low, quiet, and cracked on the last syllable. This time it wasn't because she had given herself to someone else, because he thought he had finally lost her - no, this time it was because the future flashed before his eyes like a nightmare. Sakata was his sister's mate, for better or for worse, and even though they weren't always on the best of terms - Hodari knew his sister all too well. She was territorial, in the worst ways, and the fate of his beloved little pure was now at her rather unforgiving paws.
He drew himself away from his thoughts, his face stony and hard, a face that could have been easily been mistaken for anger instead of pain. It was only as he came back to reality that he realized she was still talking, and he fought hard to recognize whatever the words were. "Of course he went back to the Queen," he said slowly, "it's his duty to the pride." His jaw was clenching in his first real display of anger, although it certainly wasn't for her. He'd always seen Tifu as something innocent, and being the brother of Jini, his opinion of Sakata wasn't always the finest.
A low sigh broke his lips as he pushed himself up, brushing past her to stand at the entrance of the cave. It was a sticky situation, in so many ways. Once Jini found out, he had no doubt she'd push for the Pure to be sacrificed - along with the cubs. While he was in no hurry to sacrifice her out of his own selfishness, he also realized the harm it could do to prematurely sacrifice such a perfect Pure. Jini would be blind with rage, he had no doubt, and he didn't want to let her put herself or the pride in bad standing with the spirits over her jealousy. Not that he could blame her, in the end - it was just too bad there was no way to sacrifice a Warleader. His head hung as he realized there was really one way out of this, which would hurt others and make him look no better than that double-timing brute himself.
"I've got a dark pelt, Tifu," he said quietly, even as he stared out at the sun from the entrance of his den. He refused to meet her eyes as he said it, because he knew his would appear hollow. He was getting what he wanted, but at what cost? Sakata's fidelity, Tifu's innocence, Jini's trust, Umoya's heart. He shut his eyes, a sadly amused smile spread over his maw as he stood there with his back to her. Funny, the wicked ways the spirits granted the heart's deepest wish.
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Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2009 11:17 am
As he repeated the name she'd given him, the Pure nodded slowly, wincing away from him, even though his anger, she knew, was not directed towards her. Granted, it should have been (she'd started this knowing it was wrong - she'd only gotten what was coming to her), but it wasn't, "It wasn't his fault," she murmured suddenly, "I started it; it was my fault. I can't begrudge him. I brought this on myself, Hodari," she was naive at the best of times, yes, but she was also smart enough to know her actions had edge the Warleader on, and thus the blame lay on her.
"It's his duty to the Queen and himself, Hodari..." she paused, her tongue dipping out of her maw to lick her lips, dry from the stress of the conversation, "I know they don't look it, most of the time, but they love each other, in their own ways. I was stupid, and I let myself be guided by what I was feeling at the time," she shook her head, cringing inwardly. She had, since her brother's death, believed that the queen didn't always talk the truth. She believed it hadn't been her brother's time, and that he'd joined the spirits far too soon, "I don't want to join the spirits prematurely, Hodari," the words were a mere ghost of a whisper, dangerous words due to their implications and whom she was talking to, but at that point, she had little to lose, "I will join them happily when the time comes... but I fear I might have made a mistake that will cost me eternity."
It wasn't till he spoke again that Tifu's head snapped towards him. For a long moment, she stared at him with her mouth gaping open, unable to form words. When she finally swallowed the lump that had mysteriously formed in her throat, she lifted herself from the shadows to draw nearer, "Hodari... what about Umoya? I..." she seemed torn, because on one paw, he knew her situation already, and seemed like a perfect candidate... on the other though, she despised to think she would risk his friendship with her, not to mention his relationship with Umoya to help her, "Are you sure about that?" while it was true she was asking him, there was a faint spark of hope in her eyes, for the first time since she'd started talking that evening, "That would..." a pause, her brows furrowing, "Jini will know regardless. The queen is far from ignorant. She'll know when she sets her eyes on them..." ultimately, she knew what that meant.
She could only hope she was wrong.
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Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2009 12:35 pm
Hodari wanted to sneer as she spoke of how it was her fault, how she started it. Even if she'd somehow convinced herself to place the blame on her own head, Hodari could and would put the blame on the dark-pelted male. He was meant to be his sister's mate, and though the Queen and Warleader rarely got along as most mates should within this pride, Sakata had put Tifu in grave danger with this mistake.
"I wouldn't have you join the spirits early," he shook his head as he stared out at the open space before his den, "that would mean ruin for you and the pride." He had always admired her courage, her mission, the way she would one day willingly sacrifice herself to pave the way for the pride's success. Yet, there was that fool, willing to risk it all for a few minutes of self gratification. There were few times that Hodari could claim that he was truly, really angry, but this was one of those times. His blood felt like it was boiling, and for the first time he understood the term 'blind rage'. Even he was having trouble keeping his emotions in check.
He sighed, forcing away the boiling anger and turning to look at her with a calmer expression, although he still felt a little on edge. "I won't pretend that Umoya and I have a perfect relationship, or that our pairing was anything more than convenience." It had been a good pair off, looked upon highly by their peers, and though they weren't unhappy, they were certainly not what Hodari would describe as 'in love'. "Not that I expect her to be happy, I'm not delusional, but if something isn't done about this then it will be a certain disaster."
He frowned and turned away from the den entrance, moving to sit back down at her side again. "Jini will know, or suspect it, because we both know that even if I'm dark like he is - our pelts are different enough," he sighed, shutting his eyes, feeling weariness creeping in and replacing the anger. At least the anger had been vitalizing, it had given him strength. "But perhaps if she honestly believes that I think they're my cubs, if she thinks I'm oblivious enough, she'll leave them and you alone for my sake."
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Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2009 3:19 pm
She knew that as of late, some sacrifices had gained.... dangerous ideas, but she'd never been one of them. At the end of the day, Takatifu was a traditionalist, and she would willingly give her life for the pride. However, she knew first hand, that it wasn't her time just yet; there were things she still had to do for the pride... for herself. She decided against saying anything else regarding that particular subject, and instead, offered the dark male a smile, visibly relaxing thanks to his words.
By all means, Hodari shouldn't have had a calming effect on Tifu, for he was the very lion that in time, would end her life. He was the one destined to sacrifice her in the end, and yet the female had always felt, that for whatever reason, she could trust him. She befriended him long back, when they were still young, and where many others shied away from the usually dark, silent male, she found he wasn't as 'dark' as others were led to believe. She wasn't sure what it was he was hiding under that facade of his, but she'd never pried.
In a way, Sakata and Hodari were similar; the other pride members kept their distances from both males, and they made a show of being silent and hard to approach. It had always been difficult for Tifu to understand that sort of personality, taking into account she was the complete opposite, "Thank you," she whispered finally then allowed her gaze to stray out of the cave, "I... it was better than my ghost of a relationship. At least it was pure," a small sigh escaped her maw as she noticed the irony, but she soon shook that thought aside; he was offering her a way out. A way... that might just work.
A nod signalled her approval of the situation, though she paused momentarily, as if unsure of what to do before standing up to pad to his side. The den still offered them partial privacy, and.... besides, at the end of the day, if he really wished to carry out the plan, then it didn't particularly matter if she was seen there. When she reached his side, the female sat down and slowly reclined her weight against his side for a moment, her eyes closing as she visibly relaxed and deflated, as if allowing all the stress of the past few days to drain out of her, "Thank you," she repeated again, "And I'm sorry, Hodari. I'm so, so sorry..." she wasn't sure what she was sorry FOR (wrecking his life? Her own? Everything?), but it felt like something she should say.
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Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2009 4:27 pm
"That depends on your definition of 'better'," he said quietly, even as his mind started to roll over all the thoughts of he and Umoya. They weren't a loving couple, they weren't even all that terribly close. The fact that they had yet to produce any cubs was enough proof of that. Yet, he was left wondering if Tifu loved Sakata. She had been willing to risk a lot of things to be with him, and she was now carrying his cubs, which would no doubt have some greater meaning to her. Just when he was finally getting what he always coveted, would she still belong to someone else?
"Don't be sorry," his head shook as he shifted to accommodate her weight. He couldn't accept her apology when he still held mixed feelings about the entire situation. A tragedy, to be sure, but a tragedy that ultimately gave him everything he'd ever wanted. "It was just a mistake, you couldn't know it would all lead to.. this." Besides that, he still blamed Sakata. He couldn't find it in him to put the blame on the innocent, naive little Pure.
"All I need to do is talk to Umoya," he sighed and leaned his head down atop her own. Even if there was relatively little between them, he knew Umoya's territorial nature could rival his sister's on a good day. He wasn't so unwise as to think that he could make a clean break with her and not have her blow up. Still, it wasn't just for his own selfishness, it was for the good of the pride. He just had to remind himself of that, even if it did little to make him feel better.
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Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2009 4:48 pm
"I did," she said, and for the first time in... forever, the small lioness sounded angry, though it was mostly with herself, "I did. I knew it was wrong. I knew from the start. The spirits laughed at me so hard. But I was selfish. I'd never felt..." she cut herself off and frowned, realising her breath in a sigh before biting her lip till she almost drew blood.
"It doesn't matter. It was selfish, and it was wrong. I should have known better. I knew it and still I allowed myself to..." again she bit her lip, this time till she tasted copper in her mouth, "I should be sorry, Hodari. I risked myself. I risked the warleader's family, his life, and this pride on a selfish whim," she could feel humidity gathering around her eyes, and she leaned away from his form to brush a paw against her face in an almost angry movement, "Everything will be alright..." she was voicing the warleader's last words to her, though there was no way the Vates could know that, "Do you really think that 'everything will be alright'?" the tears refused to dissipate completely, though it was no longer despair she was feeling.
In all honesty, she didn't know what she was feeling. It was a little bit of everything, all at the same time; anger, relief, frustration... mixed in with a little bit of happiness at knowing that there was someone she could rely on, "I need to go... make a few arrangements myself, while you talk to Umoya," she told him finally, lifting her head up to look him in the eye, "I need to talk to my father... and my mother, if she's still around, I don't know," she'd seen the lithe goddess, but she came and went with the breeze, and seemed 'off' on the best of days anyhow, "I'll see you soon then, Hodari," she placed the top of her head against his side for a moment before pushing herself to her feet, trotting off outside, sparing him a glance before vanishing.
She needed to set things up fast; the spirits knew she'd lost enough time padding in circles. She was going to start showing signs of pregnancy soon, and she needed to be officially mated to the Vates by then. Little did the lithe Pure know that perhaps she was getting what she'd been looking for all along. After all, she'd never known of Hodari's feelings. How could she? She was naive, at the best of times; it was a both a gift and a curse at times.
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Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2009 5:06 pm
That familiar feeling of rage was boiling up in him again as he listened to her put herself down. She really blamed herself for everything that had happened to her, for all of this. He believed the Warleader knew full and well what he was doing, and did it with pleasure. He couldn't bring himself to put the fault on her, he never would. Maybe it was his alliance to his sister that made his suspicions of Sakata come so easily. Even then, he kept his jaw clamped tightly shut, not a word passed his lips. He wasn't one to speak out of place, and even if they were about to embark on a dangerous journey together, he held his tongue. She had things hard enough without him arguing with her over specifics.
"You're right, you have a lot to do," he said, glad for the change of subject. He looked down at his feet, an attempt to hide his anger but it simply looked as if he were taking a deep, steadying breath in his weariness - probably from the entire situation. "I'll have to go seek Umoya out, there's no telling when she'll be home and I'd rather have this done as quickly as possible." Get the wounding over with fast, so he knew what he had to deal with afterward.
He offered her a weak, forced smile as she stood to leave, watching her as she padded down the trail away from his den. He'd just been handed everything he'd wanted, so why did he feel like it was some form of punishment? With a sigh, he pushed himself up to his feet and wearily stalked out of the den. He needed to find his mate, and tell her he was leaving her for someone else that didn't love him.
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