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 Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 6:18 am
The feast had been... Tough. He and Naedreth had gone, and congratulated as many of the new weyrlings as they could but it hadn't felt much like a party. It had been more like a funeral. Now it was the day after, the evening after rather, and C'mor and Naedreth were down by the lake. The bronze keened softly and placed his head in his rider's lap as the young man sat down.
"Mine, it still hurts. He shouldn't be gone, he should have found His. The last egg should have hatched too, but losing the blue was worse. He just... went."
C'mor sighed wearily and began to stroke Naedreth's eyeridges in an attempt to comfort both of them; he could feel every bit of the young dragon's pain, it was almost too much to bear. "I know Naedreth, I know. He should have. He didn't though, and we have to cope with that. I know it isn't easy, but we must." They had a life to get on with, lessons to perfect, and shells he wanted to do something, something to help everyone in this whole crowded, unhappy place. He couldn't do that though, he was only one weyrling, but he would do all he could even if it wasn't much in the great scheme of things. Start small and build up, encourage others to do the same. Something like that anyway; grief and weariness were tangling his mind up too much to do any real thinking just now.
"Yes," Naedreth rumbled softly and lifted his head to nuzzle C'mor's face. "We will make a difference somehow, but... I can't think of it just now Mine. It all hurts too much."
"I know," C'mor said softly, stroking the side of his lifemate's face, "I know. It'll get better, it'll just take a while." Dragons had short memories, but so long as the matter was spoken of, and as long as he himself was thinking about it, Naedreth would remember. Perhaps he always would; dragon memories were strange like that.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 6:26 am
Kella hadn't even gone to the feast. She couldn't face anyone there. Despite the fact that she had few friends, the young woman was feeling shame- to some degree- that she hadn't impressed. Piled on top of that was the despair and grief she felt for the betweened blue. The dud egg didn't tear her up inside so much as the suicidal-blue. That was sharding depressing. s**t, Kella did even want to be out tonight! But she had forced herself out of bed sometime in the afternoon.
Well, it was more like her growling stomach had forced her up. She'd made her way to the kitchen, slowly, and found a meager meal. Fruit, toast, and some chilled juice. Nothing heavy- she didn't know if she could handle it. The poor, lost blue's cries echoed off the stone walls of the caverns as she moved about. They reverberated, louder and louder until Kella finally pushed her chair back roughly and ran from the table, leaving her half-eaten food behind.
She needed fresh air. She ran out into the Bowl, towards the lake. After closing the distance quickly, she stopped and put her hands on her knees, inhaling deeply the cool, refreshing evening air. One lungful, two lungfuls- and on the third, Kella fell to her knees. She began to cry, as hard as she had last night. The difference was, she didn't care who saw her this time. Kella was as confused as the blue had seemed yesterday. She didn't understand what Kyllae had done to mess up him, or his egg, so badly that he couldn't find a rider. There had been so many candidates! How could NONE of them be right for him?! Tears fell from her eyes, staining her cheeks in dark, angry paths. Not only was Kella confused, but she was frustrated- could she have done something, other than just stand there in stunned silence? Could she have helped in any way? It was certainly too late to find out now, but the question burned incessantly.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 6:45 am
He had been too absorbed in stroking Naedreth to notice they weren't alone until the girl started crying... It was Kella. On spotting her, Naedreth keened louder; more sadness. C'mor swallowed a lump in his throat and patted the bronze's neck as he got to his feet. Do what you could when you could to make a difference, that was the thing. With Naedreth at his side, C'mor walked slowly over to where the young woman knelt, and joined her in the grass.
"Hey," he touched her shoulder lightly and tried to find a reassuring smile. It didn't work, so he gave up; there wasn't anything to smile about, and he wasn't about to fake it. He wished he could think of something other than 'hey' to say though. What was he supposed to say, what was anyone supposed to say at a time like this? 'It'll be okay'? Hardly. A dragonet had gone between because of what someone had done to it; the shock of that and the agony of its helpless cries and then it was just gone!...
Naedreth keened again, and C'mor reached out to put his other arm around the bronze's neck. It was too much. Finding moisture beginning to build in his eyes, C'mor blinked rapidly a few times in an attempt to clear it away. A hatchling had gone between. The image of that pale hide, one moment there and the next not, would be burned into his mind's eye forever, he was sure of it.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 6:55 am
Once upon a time, Kella would have been outraged and indignant at C'mor finding her crying. She would have pretended like she was fine, wiped away her tears and pushed the bronzerider away. To let someone see this side of her was to make herself vulnerable, and that was unacceptable! Kella was tough, she was strong- but she couldn't hide it this time. Naedreth's renewed keening, Kella heaved a great sob, her small frame shaking with the intensity of her sorrow.
She could not even find the words to respond to C'mor. She looked up at him, her dark eyes rimmed with tears. "Oh, C'mor, tha-at poor little- " Kella hiccuped, and threw her arms around C'mor's neck, burrowing her face in the spot where his neck met his shoulder. It wasn't so much the image of the blue stumbling around, confused and lost, that had Kella all worked up. It was his haunting cries- she swore, she could still hear him! Even out here in the Bowl, in this wide, open space.
Kella pulled herself away from C'mor after a few moments, suddenly becoming uncomfortable in being so close. It was.. awkward. She hadn't meant to cross any lines; she didn't know how the bronzerider would feel about being so close physically with someone he, really, hardly knew. Kella hazarded a glance to Naedreth, and could tell that the bronze was deeply affected by the loss of one of his kin. She wanted to reach over, stroke his nose and soothe him- but refrained. "Some hatching, hmm?" Kella said in a small, quite voice, forcing the words out to try and make the moment less uncomfortable- but felt as though she only made it worse.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 7:07 am
He froze for a moment when she flung her arms around him, but after a heartbeat he shook himself mentally and returned the embrace. He wasn't quite sure if the moment of closeness made him feel better or worse, certainly he felt a lot closer to losing control of himself. Leaning on other people was like that, it made it feel okay not to be strong all the time yourself. When Kella pulled back, he raised his hands to his face to wipe away tears before sitting down properly and putting his arm back around Naedreth.
"Yea... Some hatching," he replied, his voice slightly shaky with pent up emotion. As Naedreth - grey-eyed with sadness - laid his head in his lap again, he made a small choked noise and bowed his head into his hands for a moment. When he looked back up, tears were running freely down his face. "I suppose... I suppose I was going to see something like that eventually," he said with a shake of his head, "but this was so... This could so easily have been prevented. I can't believe a lesson like this was needed to show exactly why we have rules, and why they mean everyone." It was hard for him to understand, law-abiding sort that he was, how anyone could think it was okay to go in and touch soft eggs. Not just one, the whole clutch; she must have realized that they were soft and therefore vulnerable after touching the very first, but she'd touched them all anyway. He had, C'mor decided, found someone he disliked more than Veyes. A lot more.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 7:15 am
Maybe that was why Kella suddenly felt so uncomfortable- she realized just what being that close to someone could do to her. She loved being independent and self-supportive. Her parents hadn't wanted her, and her foster mother- although a wonderful person- was quite busy as one of the top cooks in the kitchen. Kella had A LOT of personal time. With it, she had matured rather quickly, and grown one HECK of an independent streak. She took a moment to wipe her own tears away, trying to draw upon some reserve of strength and push the sadness away. The blue was gone, and there wasn't anything anyone could do for him at this point.
But when C'mor looked back up, tears streaming freely down his own face, Kella couldn't keep it together. She made a strangled noise, like something caught in her throat, and tears erupted once more. She was of the same mindset as the bronzerider; rules were in place FOR A REASON, and Kyllae only proved their point. The disastrous results of breaking a rule had been made all too clear yesterday. "What I don't understand, is where that wherry-brained b***h gets off thinking that the rules don't apply to her!" Kella half-yelled, half-sobbed. Kella had never hated anyone in her life. But she thought she may be close. To be SO ignorant, to deliberately break a rule without any thought of the consequences.. Kella wanted to shove a rule or three down Kyllae's throat.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 7:27 am
C'mor clenched his jaw tightly and shook his head, stroking Naedreth's head rhythmically. "I don't know," he muttered, "I don't know. It's not even as if it's something that couldn't hurt anyone else like being out of your dorm late or something. Touching soft eggs... what was she thinking?" He thought he knew that, or could guess. The only possibility that had sprung to mind was that the girl might have thought she was giving herself an edge by sneaking in early.
"I don't even know what was done to her," he said hollowly after a moment or two. "I mean... she's still here, isn't she? She was allowed to stay... Though after all that's happened I suppose that might change. Doesn't help though. No matter what's done to her it can't fix what she did."
"Nothing can fix what she did." Naedreth said, his voice heavy with pain and weariness. "All we can do now is help one another, and the hatchlings that made it, and all the people who have been hurt by this... I don't think there is much even we can do for them though Mine. All we can do is be here."
That was better than nothing though, a lot better. Being alone when you were this torn apart was... was not nice, to say the least. He was glad Kyllae hadn't done anything to Naedreth's clutch; his wonderful bronze might have been the one that lost its mind and went between.
"Never," Naedreth responded firmly, "I would always have found you. I am the greatest, and you are the greatest. Of course I would have found you."
C'mor was glad that he was learning to keep some thoughts back from his dragon. It was all too easy to imagine him stumbling around, screaming for a mind he could not connect to, and then vanishing forever.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 7:46 am
Kella's clenched her fists, the short nails on her fingertips digging into her palm. She was feeling all sorts of emotions, in overwhelming proportions- and it wasn't healthy. She was angry, confused, frustrated, depressed, and just downright distressed. What pissed Kella off THE MOST, though, was what C'mor enlightened her to next. Kyllae hadn't been punished? In any way? Whaaaat the fffuuuuu- "I saw her on the sands. At the hatching. Why was she even there?! The girl had the AUDACITY to SHOW HER FACE?!" Kella was yelling, now. Her sorrow and despair for the loss of such a young life had turned once she found someone to direct the blame to.
"I can't believe she was allowed to stand!" Kella was absolutely astounded at the lack of leadership stepping up on this one. The girl had broken a rule, and it had proven to have some DIRE results. If Kyllae hadn't been punished at first, she better be now. "I heard Favan just about tore her a new one, though. Cheoth should have eaten her," Kella suggested with a wry snort. "We'd certainly be better off without people like her around," the dark-skinned girl mused bitterly.
"Nothing can fix what she did- no, but certainly something can be done to prevent this sort of epic screw up again," Kella snarled, her words nearly dripping with acid. A small voice in Kella's mind added fuel to the fire, suggesting that if Kyllae hadn't touched the eggs, maybe the blue- or the dud- would have been her dragon. Hers. She didn't have to be alone right now- but the reason she was? Kyllae. Of course, she didn't have quite the perspective that C'mor did, having Naedreth- Kella was certain that C'mor might be feeling slightly venomous, imagining how things might be if it had been Naedreth's clutch touched, rather than yesterday's.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 7:59 am
"She was THERE?" C'mor seldom raised his voice, but in this case he felt it was fully warranted. She had actually shown her face at the hatching, after what she'd done? Thread take her, and what were their leaders thinking?... Or had she been told she wasn't allowed to stand, but had gone anyway? After her display with the eggs to begin with, he could believe that. She'd probably crept in thinking she was really clever, just as she must have done when she'd slunk onto the sands to lay her filthy hands on the soft eggs.
Naedreth had raised his head, eyes now swirling orange with rage. The one who had killed that poor blue had been there, thinking she was worthy of a dragon? "How dare she! How dare she be there!" he could not imagine the dragon that would choose her, but she had been there. She had no right to have been there! She should not have been there, it was wrong!
Taking a breath that he had intended to be steadying, but ended up shaking with anger and tears, C'mor shook his head. "People will learn from this. It should never have happened, but you can guarantee that it will never happen again. Nobody would want to be responsible for something like this." At least he hoped they would not. Maybe somebody like the girl herself wouldn't be too put off though, he didn't actually know her and couldn't say. A more severe punishment than this was definitely needed though, she couldn't be allowed to get away with what she had done.
"I think I was punished worse than she was for just being in the same place as some people who stole some food and wine," C'mor went on with a shake of of his head. "Whatever her punishment was, it wasn't very public, was it? I would have expected... I don't know, something, I would at least have expected her to be banned from the sands." She should have been thrown out the moment her crime had been uncovered, no matter whether any of the eggs had been harmed or not. As it stood, he personally felt the self-centered b***h should just be made holdless; she'd meet plenty of people just as selfish and thoughtless as she was out there on her own.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 8:17 am
Kella had never heard the young bronzerider yell. It made her flinch. She recoiled away from C'mor, wrapping her arms around herself consolingly. She was shaking with both anger and sadness. Kella desperately wanted to take matters into her own hands, and punish Kyllae where the Weyrleaders had failed. How dare she be allowed to escape veritably unscathed? Favan had certainly verbally lashed the girl, that much was known- but other than that, where were the repercussions for her actions?
Kella bobbed her head to confirm her previous statement. "Yep, I saw her there. I don't know where she found the balls to show her disgraceful face, but.. She was there," Kella said quietly, pulling her knees up to her chest and resting her chin on them. "Who knows if she was supposed to be there- but, hey. The rules don't apply to her, remember? So, if she was told not to go.. She probably thought they were talking to the air-headed b***h next to her," Kella sighed heavily and shook her head. This was all so ******** up.
Naedreth's reaction startled Kella- and once again, the dark-skinned girl wanted to comfort the bronze somehow. But, she didn't want to get her fingers bitten off or something. Also, after the traumatizing scenes she witnessed the previous day, Kella wasn't too keen on getting too close to a dragon just yet. The hurt was still too fresh. Rejection wasn't a nice feeling- though it was, by far, the least of her worries. Watching the blue jump between hurt the worst, for now. Kella was sure it would fade- and in time, it was rejection which would leave a bitter taste in her mouth.
"I'll drag her out of this Weyr myself," Kella viciously boasted, her voice so sharp that one couldn't be sure whether she was serious or not. It was probably better to just take her seriously, and go with it. Kella grew indignant at C'mor's declaration of being punished worse for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. "See? What the- seriously?! Ugh. The leadership in this place is seriously messed up if you were punished worse than her. SHE MURDERED. The b***h was given a slap on the wrist, and she's still here. WHAT is wrong there?" Kella threw up her hands in utter exasperation. She couldn't understand why the girl was still here, after all the drama and disaster she had caused.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 8:39 am
Unbelievable. Well, from most people it would be unbelievable. From Kyllae, who could say. "No, I guess they don't apply to her." he was managing to control his temper again now, more or less; his hands seemed to want to make fists, but he was too busy stroking Naedreth for them to do that. If Naedreth wasn't here, he might be storming off right now to demand and explanation of the selfish b***h.
"It'd be wonderful to just drag her off, maybe shove her on the first boat to the northern continent so she can't sneak back easily... They must be doing something else to her," he went on, shaking his head with a frown. "You remember that sevenday all candidates had to clean the latrines out? That was because two candidates stole some food and wine for the kitchens that was meant for a hatching feast. Those of us that were there - five of us, and only two of us did anything wrong - were cleaning them until the next hatching. Not to mention how some of the others treated us. I got more bruises in that sevenday than I usually do in half a turn... It's not that I minded really," he felt the need to clarify this, "those that stole did wrong, and it would have been hard to pick out who was actually guilty and who wasn't, people lie after all... What bothers me is that nothing at all seems to have been done to her so far other than a dressing down. Maybe they were waiting until after the hatching to decide what to do with her."
Maybe that was the case, he couldn't imagine anyone just shrugging her crime off like that. "There was no Touching," he shrugged, "but that punished you, and all candidates, as much as it punished her. More everyone else actually, the number of injuries... They must be doing something else to her."
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 8:52 am
Kella made a face, one of disgust and disdain. That sevenday had been the worst, the smelliest! "Latrine duty for us.. that was your fault?" She inquired, arching an eyebrow. "Well, not your fault, since you didn't steal anything- but, oh, you know what I mean," she said, waving a hand in the air as if to brush away any offense she might have given. "That was awful, the latrines are the worst chore," Kella said quietly, sighing.
"They have to do something to her," Kella said, her voice quiet, almost pleading and plaintive- as if she and C'mor could do something about this whole Kyllae mess. "I can't believe how lopsided and unfair the punishment system is here. The wrongfully accused get smacked with a week's worth of the worst chores, and get bullied on top of it all- and all that selfish dimglow gets is a smack on the wrist, and time alone to wallow in self-pity. IF she even feels sorry for what she did!" Kella nearly shrieked her last sentence, her temper flaring once again. "I wonder if she's even sorry for what she did."
"They have to punish her. They didn't before- and that was a mistake. But now that dragonets have died," Kella choked out the word, her throat and chest tightening as she said it. "They can't let her slip away with nothing more. I don't even know what. Throw her out of the Weyr, chain her to a post during Thread, stick her on an island with only the bare minimum of supplies- just do something, something equivalent to her crime."
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 9:07 am
C'mor sighed and shrugged. "Well, if they don't do anything themselves, you can be sure most of the rest of the Weyr will take matters into their own hands. She'll not get a moment of peace until this is forgotten..." The blue seeming as though it was trying to fly, to escape, and then vanishing, and then the cries of anguished humans and dragons. "Probably for as long as she stays here then," he concluded grimly.
Favan and or Helirra would do something though, knowing Favan and considering what she had been put through both before and after the hatching, it would be vindictive. Would that satisfy him? No, it wouldn't, he didn't much care for vengeance; he just wanted her to be gone, gone where she couldn't harm any more dragons, and where there was no chance of her Impressing one.
A quiet, rather subdued cheep broke the silence then, and Gilden landed on the ground beside C'mor. Everyone was sad, and she was sad too, but she had brought C'mor a bowl of honey-coated nuts. He liked those - she held up the dish - he would feel better? Maybe his friend wanted some as well?
C'mor sighed and reached down to stroke the flitts head, wondering vaguely where she had acquired the treat from. "Thanks Gild..." he really wasn't hungry, but he didn;t want to disappoint the tiny queen so he took a couple and munched them. "Help yourself if you fancy any," he said with a gesture to the dish, which Gilden had now put down. "Thanks for bringing these," he added to the flitt as she hopped up onto his shoulder, sending a feeling of thanks along with the words, "very kind of you." It was going to take a lot more than sweet nuts to make Kella or himself feel any better, but Gilden was doing her best and that was something to appreciate.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 9:24 am
"I don't blame them- I, for one, will be part of the angry mob with torches and pitchforks. I'll toss her out myself," Kella reiterated, having already once stated she'd drag Kyllae out by herself, if it came to that. "I can't imagine the girl WANTING to stay here," Kella mused, shrugging. "If I pissed that many people off, I'd apologize- I'd GROVEL, and then get out. I'd try to learn from my mistake, then I'd want to start over, somewhere new, where no one knew of what I'd done. You know?"
Knowing Favan's general temperament, Kella couldn't imagine that punishment was very far away for Kyllae. Now that the hatching had concluded, and the full impact of the girl's actions could be seen.. Kella was surprised she couldn't hear Favan and Cheoth raging right now. She imagined that Helirra and Vasanth were retaining some sort of hold over the junior weyrwoman. Kella was different from C'mor in that she wanted vengeance- but she also wanted Kyllae gone. But exile wasn't enough, not after all the pain and distress she'd caused the Weyr. To turn her away, forget her face and name, and pretend like nothing had ever happened- that may leave a bitter taste in a lot of Weyrfolks' mouths. With all the tension in the Weyr currently, with the overcrowding, and all the different factions popping up, Kyllae certainly added fuel to the fire.
Gilden was a bit of a surprise for Kella. She had honestly forgotten that C'mor had the gold firelizard- so her appearance caused Kella a moment of confusion. "Oh!" She said quietly when the gold appeared, the bowl of honey-coated nuts in her front hands. Paws? What was it the firelizards had? Kella's eyebrows furrowed as she pondered it for a moment, then dismissed the thought- it wasn't relevant.
Kella's confusion was replaced with a weak smile, and a fairly decent attempt to send Gilden her feelings of gratitude for the treat and visit. "Thanks, little thing," she said to the queen and turned her weak smile to C'mor. "She's really cute, you know," she complimented the bronzerider on his little friend. "Not that a sweet treat will do much to solve this monumental dilemma- but she's very sweet, to try and smooth things over," Kella went on. She reached over to the bowl and grabbed a small handful of the honey-coated nuts, popping a couple in her mouth to chew thoughtfully.
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 11:10 am
C'mor gave a slight smile and nodded, reaching up to stroke Gilden again. "Yea, she's a good girl. Food and cuddles is what she understands, so that's what she gives me when I'm unhappy." As if to prove his point, the flitt crooned fondly and nuzzed his ear. Everything would work out eventually, he would stop feeling so unhappy; she would bring nice food and give him more attention than ever until he did, big bronze too! She dipped her head down and crooned at Naedreth; things were hurting, but she would make them all better.
"She'd be sensible to get out as soon as she can. I wouldn't be surprised if she's gone already," C'mor went on with a nod. "Like you, if I had done anything that bad I'd try to let everyone know how sorry I was and then run for my life to be frank." If he was that sort of person he would anyway. If he did anything like that as who he was now, he'd hand out the pitchforks and then he'd take his due. He couldn't imagine being responsible for the death of a dragon, let alone to know he had caused that death for purely selfish reasons.
"I'm sure if she is tossed out, there will be plenty of riders happy to see her reputation proceeds here wherever she goes," C'mor went on darkly after a moment. "Chances are no matter where in the world she goes she won't have any peace. Not every rider would want to do that, to tear up the whole of the rest of her life, but I'm certain at least a few will, and even one would be enough." Did people deserve second chances?... Sometimes, for some crimes. Theft for example. This hatching had really put into perspective what Veyes and Firyal had done on that evening that now seemed like a lifetime away. He couldn't forget his grudge though; the theft he could forgive in time, but not how Veyes had betrayed his so called friends in the kitchen.
"Treachery is no good," Naedreth agreed, "that is not a way for anyone to behave. Not everyone is as smart as we are though, they do very stupid and cruel things because their minds are too small, and their hearts are too small and filled with themselves. I did not think anyone could be as bad as that girl though Mine. I didn't know people like her existed in our world."
C'mor sighed and patted his lifemate's neck. They loved to learn things together, to learn was to strive for greatness, but some lessons were hard to learn. Some people, it turned out, were low down scum.
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