Welcome to Gaia! ::

Now that I have your attention, I wish to:

(1) Say, "hello."

"Hello, World!"

(2) Say, "******** you, ******** you, RSJ!"

DIS!

(3) Bring the the attention of all the people here in the guild, as well as all the general readership that frequents this abstract cesspool (except some of the mods and devs I know, you guys have my undying love), some very important "goings on."

-Firstly, there is a wonderful thing that is going on from the people known collectively as "PUMP." We will be producing a collective anthology that will be published some time around late Decemeber or early January. It will be in a small ashcan sized digest of around 20-30 pages. Unfortunately, it is closed to submissions (as the deadline is this Thanksgiving!), but I am bringing this to your attention as it will be a mere (paltry) sum of $5 (plus modest S&H) to purchase some really fine works from people that you may or may not know. Information will be posted about it at the end of November at the website that is disclosed below!

-Secondly, RSJ owes me BIG and only HE knows what I am talking about. However, as I have since cashed at least ONE major favor, he is bound to my horrible comic book script that is simply titled "Shin Bottle Fairy Princess: Cream Queen Delight XYXX." It is also known simply as "the worst comic ever" and is in production at the moment, and will be available as soon as RSJ gets pages inked and sent to me for lettering and then collective editing. I am guessing we will be looking for a (self)publishing date of February of the new year. It will be ashcan sized and variable in page length, but it should hopefully be a consistent 20-30 pages per "issue" if all goes well. Look to spend about $3 plus modest S&H to get your hands on these bad boys.

The name says it all and it truly will be the worst possible value for your money, unless you want to find something that horrible in which case it will be the BEST possible value for your money! If you want to see any of it, or at least look in on the two warped minds that are bringing this to you, feel free to hit the LiveJournal community "worst comic ever" at http://livejournal.com/community/worstcomicever or just pester RSJ until he gives you details.

Remember! This is license and encouragement to pester the ******** out of RSJ to get him to produce more of this horrible, horrible, abomination in the eyes of GOD ALMIGHTY. If you wish to see this collection of pages of wrong diligent pornography angelic art, then be sure to bother RSJ until he gives up and gets to work again!

I was going to say something witty, but instead I'll just ask for you to kindly provide more info on the Pump thing and how it can be ordered. Are international orders catered for?

And RSJ, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, get drawing on the Worst Comic Ever, PRONTO.

Orders are on a first come first server basis for now, but you can "reserve" a copy in the new preliminary post that is on the website for "the worst comic ever" [http://livejournal.com/community/worstcomicever] and yes, international copies will be entertained, provided that you are able to pay for the additional shipping and handling. I am guessing it would not be much, just an additional dollar for the air mail.

More details about the anthology will be posted on the website as more details become available, including sneak peeks, proofs, and all that jazz. Look to around the end of November for some more juicy sneak peeks of the anthology pages.

For now, the anthology will be a limited run of 50 copies, with more being available if interest is high enough. I am pretty confident this will be worth the money, if only for the pinups from people you know and love, as well as awesome stuff from people you don't know, but should. The highlight will be a large 20(+?) pages short story from the warped minds of Thomas "Diesel" Throop and Alex "o_8" Ahad. Covers by "moi."

Gamera. It's been a while.

YOUSHOULDTOTALLYSTOPBYTHEAYGGSMOREOFTEN!!1

*Goes to check all this comicy goodness out*

Worst Comic Ever: DC Comics realeased/is gonig to release a comic where- get this- their super heros turned into zombies. The thing I wonder, though, is HOW?

They'll just use their normal reason:

Me: How did this happen?
Them: Um.. er.... Uh... a wizard did it!*Runs away*

Unfortunately, you are misled or hopelessly naive.

Shin Bottle Fairy Princess: Cream Queen Delight XYXX will be pandering to several fetishes not limited to, but including:

Dickgirls
Girls that look like boys
Boys that look like girls
Girls that look like boys liking boys that look like girls
Sex
Steam
Japanese stlye baths
Japanese style baths with a girl with cat ears
Japanese style baths with a girl with dog ears
Japanese style baths with a girl with rabbit ears
Jack Thompson
Jack Thompson and Japanese style baths with naked girls
Collectible card games
Robots
Robots wearing schoolgirl outfits
Robo-panties
Tentacles
Robo-tentacles
Girls with missing limbs
Girls that don't have missing limbs
Jack Thompson
Tron
Holy Dildos
Cute animal pets
XTREEM AKSHUN
Porn
Ninjas
Pirates
Pirate ninjas
Ninja pirates
Dickgirls

AND MORE.

The worst comic ever will pander to every single fetish that exists out there, and those that do not exist. Yet.

If it does not make people stop reading the comic, then we will try harder. Faster. Stronger.

And if that doesn't offend people, then we will add more graphic sex with censor bars in just the right places to piss people off, and some that are just way out there in the way of people who have earlobe fetishes, etc.

Take your time. Kuni (or whatever he's called these days) pulled the plug on my account at Slipshine and won't respond to my e-mails about it. If he won't take a money order for another 6 months of membership, I'm not going to beg.

Nah, that device only loads a lovely dose of psycho-depressives - directly into the p***s - during sex.

Haven't you read Snow Crash? It's required reading - by LAW.