Boyan wonders what his life would have been like if he'd had a time machine.

Five years ago, there was a Boyan, fresh from an encounter with the Mist Chaos, fresh from a daring escape from the hands of Lucid Restorers who wished to experiment on him, indulging in a hot bath upon returning home and having his old, filthy, tattered rags replaced with crisp new clothes-- the robes of an adult male. Sitting at a crossroad in his life and not even realizing it. That folded stack of clothes, symbolizing his readiness to enter into an adult marriage with Tsubame.

What if, five years ago, the Boyan of today were to barge in on his younger self and tell him that the road on which he forged ahead had forks? That the main road he so unwaveringly tread on would lead him to unimaginable happiness but also unimaginable despair?

Would he listen?

And what if he did? Boyan would lose so much-- Tsuyoshi, he fears, has already been lost, but to lose Melody as well, to lose his grandchildren... Would it be worth it?

Would those forks have led him to anywhere worth traveling?

And would there be a Boyan of five years from now, journeying back to this moment where Boyan sits at yet another crossroad, this time considering his options before going on ahead? Would the future Boyan warn himself of the specific pains he risks on each road? Would he tell himself that one of those roads leads back to happiness? Or perhaps contentedness? Or do they all lead through gnarled, thorny forests?

So much, he sullenly thinks to himself, has changed. Five years ago, would he have even entertained the thought that he would be sitting on the front steps of his own home, waiting for his wife to return home so that he may...

His thoughts trail off. May what? What, exactly, does he hope to accomplish?

He wishes he had a time machine; at least then, SOMEONE would tell him if he is heading for salvation or disaster.