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Posted: Fri Jun 19, 2009 5:31 am
The sight pierced me to the very soul. As I walked through, the sounds of crunching groaning filled my ears, and the putrid, disgusting scent of death and chaos clouded the air, contaminating my lungs.
I tried my best to keep my eyes above me, in front of me, anywhere but the ground. Of course, though, my line of vision kept straying to my feet, the last I would ever want to look. I usually caught myself before I could make out anything on the ground, but this time, I couldn't help but stop and stare in horror.
Bodies. Ripped, torn, burned, and crushed. There were heads without out bodies, and bodies without heads.
Exactly where I had been standing, a head - if you could still call it that - sat in between my feet, it's eye (one appeared to be missing) staring up at me in blank terror. It's skin had been torn off, leaving just the dark, bleeding, muscle and veins underneath
. A scream tore my throat, a sound that would have appeared vile and piercing, but sounded like music compared to this place. I stumbled backwards, landing on something warm, wet and squishy.
A scream disturbed the silence once more, but this time, I wasn't sure if it was from me or... them
I had to get out of this place, because if they found me... Bile rose in my throat just thinking about it.
I scrambled up to my feet, ignoring the blood on my clothes, or the fact that my legs were so wobbly that I could barely walk, let alone run. But I just had to get out, out to where there was sunlight. Dammit, I shouldn't have come in here.
After a couple stumbling steps, I could see the exit. The open door stood out against the dark walls, what with light pouring through.
'Im going to make it!' was the only thought running through my mind, the only strong thing about me now.
But I heard them following. They were only disoriented for a moment, apparently, before they started after me.
Twelve steps to freedom.
They were getting closer, and the squishing and crunching of bodies underneath more frequent.
Five steps.
I could see out side now, the abandoned buildings seemed to be screaming at me to hurry and get out of there and into the safe sunlight.
I was at the door. I was standing in sunlight, in the door frame. 'I made it!' was the now never-ending thought racing through my mind now.
Hands pulled at my legs, nocking me down onto the tarmac. They grabbed my legs, pulling me back into that hellhole, that... Pit of death.
I didn't move fast enough.
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Well, that was horrible! biggrin Oh well, it's like, 6:30 AM where I am, so I have a good reason to be lazy? I mean, I just made this up at the top of my head! biggrin
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Posted: Sun Jun 21, 2009 12:59 am
For coming off the top of your head, that was pretty good. There were like one or two spelling errors, but that doesn't really matter.
You should go back and rewrite it. Obviously make it longer, and maybe describe how you got into such a horrible location in the first place. Please take it into consideration.
I'll be looking forward to reading from you again. biggrin
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Posted: Mon Jun 22, 2009 10:04 am
holy toast-fish, man thats good for lazy work! lolz!
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Posted: Mon Jun 22, 2009 5:47 pm
that was really good ^^ keep writing !
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