-- AIM Log between Shasa and Abihaiwani [Nux and Fefe]
Shasa found herself spending many a days at staying down at her reflection in the water's surface. Her green eyes studied her reflection almost too intently, tilting her head just the slightest bit so her hair tuff fell over her left eye, swallowing it. Straightening her head she lifted a dark blue paw and touched the triangle that fell just below one of her eyes. Her mother didn't have such a marking, nor did either of her mother's sisters which could only mean one thing. It was a mark from her father and she felt conflicted thinking about the unknown male.
He was a lowly rogue with meant nothing, so why did she find herself thinking of him now? Of course then her thoughts drifted to her lower ranked sister, Aysu, all she ever seemed to think about or care about was her father living in the fantasy that he'd give her the love that their mother could not. Of course that was another thing that seemed to bother the young Rawal, how could she place her love and trust into someone she had never met and probably wouldn't.
She shook her head and then her body dropping her paw directly into the water, watching the ripple effect and the few drops that sprang free. "I need a distraction," she mumbled to herself.
--
It seemed the only one of the sisters whose thoughts didn't stray to their father was the middle-ranked female, whose position in life was something of average. She was marked with all the markings of the Nihang clan, so much so that she looked very much like the great Queen. If not for that faint dusting of her father's colors, she might have been a Rawal like her sister.
Abihaiwani could not complain, though. She was happy with her life, content to wander her home and look forward to her training. Despite her average ranking, she seemed to fit in amongst her family the best of all. She idolized her aunt, the great Queen of the pride, probably for no reason other than that she looked so strikingly like her in every way imaginable.
It was thoughts of the queen that filled her head as she stalked along next to the water, her ears swiveling as she heard her sister's voice. As cubs, their rankings to one another were not so concrete, and at least until they were adols she was free to be free as she wished with her. "Shasa!" she said with a bright smile, her bright eyes gleaming in the glimpses of sunlight from the canopy above.
--
Almost as if her wish was granted her sister called to her. She smiled as she turned away from the water and towards the sound of the others voice. "Abihaiwani!" She chirped rather happily as she shook her paw free of any excess water. "How are you sister? I have not seen you in a while," she commented stretching before trotting to meet her sister halfway. Her statement was true, after all she tended to keep to herself except when Horowai was giving them a lesson, to which she gave her utmost attention to. She planned on giving her mother the perfect daughter and to do so, well she needed to know her lessons well.
"Today is a beautiful day is it not?" She asked letting her green-eyed gaze drift upwards. "Too beautiful to stay indoors," she stated with a firm nod. Of course she was sure that even in the rain she would be outside, she didn't like feeling cramped and trapped as she sometimes found herself feeling in their den. Besides rain was something she found herself in adoration of.
--
"Yes, today is beautiful," she said with a pleasant smile, her bright eyes following her sister's gaze as she looked upwards at the canopy of treetops overhead. "I was out looking at flowers earlier with our nanny," she said with a happy chirp, her tail lashing behind her. She has fewer lessons to attend than Shasa did, although she still had some. The nanny was happy to oblige her trips into the small patches of flowers that bordered the clearing and the jungle when she wasn't busy though.
"I'm doing very well," she said with a small smile, sitting herself down by the side of the water. "What about you?" She tilted her head at her sister. If she had been Aysu, she probably wouldn't have bothered asking, because she knew how she was - all too well, actually.
--
Shasa nodded in agreement as she settled back on her haunches, wrapping her tail around her paws. "What kinds did you see?" She asked tilting her head a bit. She hadn't spent too much time with the flowers and at the mention of them, well it made her think about them. Maybe she would spend some time there soon. "Are they just starting to bloom?" She wasn't entirely sure when most flowers started to bloom and assumed that Abihaiwani would know. Or at least have some idea.
"Well that's good," she replied thoughtful as she snapped from her own thoughts. "I'm well, I just find myself with a lot on my mind," she told her sister. "I also can't seem to talk with Aysu at all without fighting with her about something," she sighed dropping her head the slightest bit. "And whenever I find myself troubled I find myself by the river."
--
"I saw all kinds," she said happily, a pleasant smile on her face as she thought about it, "blue ones and pink ones and yellow ones." She paused as she thought about, realizing these probably weren't the proper names, but that simply made her laugh. She liked flowers, they were pretty, but she also knew that she couldn't spend her life fawning over such silly things - they were only for cubs and males to get attached to. "Oh, some of them are big and pretty, some are only just blooming. It's very nice. The nanny let me put some in his mane." She thought he'd looked rather silly, but he'd been a good sport.
Her smiled faded slightly as Shasa continued to speak, her eyes swivelling back towards her higher-ranked sister. "Aysu fights with everyone, though, you shouldn't take that seriously. She's not happy, and mother.." she trailed off slowly and let her eyes fall to her paws, "mother doesn't make it easier for her." She shrugged a little and then shifted to lean down and lap up a bit of water from the river. "But the water is calming, the sound of it, no wonder you come here."
--
"I'll have to look for them next time," she replied laughing lightly. It was easier to be childish around her than Aysu, of course it probably had to do with personality. And attitude. She was simply happier than her other sister. "That must have been a funny picture," she retorted trying to hide her laughter at the thought. "I wish I could've seen it."
When the subject turned back to the lowest-rank sister Shasa flattened her ears against her head. "I know, but I can't help but feel as though I provoke her, I try to get her to fight," she sighed. "Sometimes I think we only fight because I want us to fight, and I don't like it." That was only half true, she'd find herself enjoying provoking her sister, taunting her, trying to see what would make her squirm but then...she felt so much guilt she was worried it would crush her. "I don't understand why mother dislikes her so."
--
Abi shrugged her shoulders slowly as she lowered herself onto her belly, letting one forelimb hang over the side of the low bank where she could let her paw trail in the lazy water that flowed through this part of the river. She'd never been one that fought, never one to make others feel bad. She was a happy cub, pleased with life and her family, and everything in general. An optimist to the core.
"Maybe you do, but Aysu is sour, maybe her nature is what spurs you into provoking?" She stared down at the water as she spoke, letting her paw dance over the top over the rolling liquid. "I don't know why mom treats her that way, except that maybe she sees her as a dishonor. She's a very low rank, and mom is kind of.. ambitious." She sighed and put her head on her non-wet paw, letting her gaze drift up to her sister.
--
"Perhaps," she mused running her paw over the grass in front of her flattening it. Although a part of her knew that wasn't right. Though Aysu was easy to taunt. Maybe that's all she was an easy target. "Maybe." She replied shrugging. She couldn't read her mother's mind, although at times she wished she could. Maybe that's all it was ranking, her mother had very high standards after all.
"I guess I shouldn't worry about matters that do not concern me," she admitted with a shake of her head. "Besides I'm sure things will work out for our sister in the end."
--
"We just have to hope that Aysu makes peace with whatever it is that is hurting her," she said softly, frowning down at the water. She didn't know what would happen if Aysu grew up and continued to hold so much spite for her mother and their past. She knew it couldn't bode well for her honor, or the matters of her standing within the clan. She already knew that she was shaping out to be a rebellious Shikar-i.
"I don't really think it's our place to worry though, Aysu will do what Aysu wants," she shrugged her shoulders and pushed herself back up into a sitting position, shaking off her paw. Her happy mood had been dampened, and she wasn't one to be fond of this sort of talk.
--
"I hope her heart heals well," she remarked standing up, her tail flicking behind her. "Yes, I'm sorry to have brought you down." She commented as studied her sister's expression. She knew that this talk wasn't exactly that of a happy one but it made her feel more relaxed.
She felt better about herself and didn't feel as conflicted as she might have been before. "Next time you go see the flowers...can I join you?"
--
She smiled and waved her paw at her sister as she stood, as if to wave away all the sadness the talk had brought bubbling up to the surface. "Don't worry about it, if I don't make you feel better, then who will?" She was always there to let her siblings lean on her - even Aysu, when she was willing to let someone into her shell.
After a moment she let out a small laugh, and nodded, pushing herself up to her feet too. "Of course, the flowers aren't just mine you know! I'll tell the nanny that you're coming too, next time. He doesn't say so, but I think he really likes flowers." She grinned brightly and let her tail swish behind her, her eyes falling onto her sister.
--
"No one I guess," she chuckled the smile returning. "Thank you," she mumbled softly dropping her gaze down for a minute as she thought about it. It was a comforting though knowing that she could always lean on her sister if she ever needed too.
Moving back to the flowers she felt happier, the thought of spending a day just to play and goof off was incredibly tempting and simply pleasing. "Okay. Probably, why else would he let you put them in his mane?"
--
"You're welcome," she chirped happily, shutting her eyes as she spoke and tilting her head up a little. Her happy mood was coming on strong, pushing the sadness that had weighed her down away quickly. It was hard to keep the little one upset for long and she certainly wasn't the type to linger over things that didn't concern her too much, at least not when she wasn't needed.
"Well, maybe to make me happy, but I still think he likes it." She giggled pleasantly and spun on her heels a bit to look back in the direction she had been walking in originally. What was it that she had been going to do? Oh, lessons. She needed to go to lessons! "Oh, I should get going before I'm late! I'm so terribly forgetful."
--
"Maybe it's both," Shasa mused with a grin. It being both sounded good to her. At her sisters exclamation she blinked startled. Lessons? Oh lessons! "Oh! I'm sorry I stopped you, you should probably go, it wouldn't do either of us any good to get mother upset." She stated shaking her head at the thought. "I'll see you later," she told her with a nod before turning away. "Bye sister."
