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 Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 12:12 am
Izzy sitting with his back against the chain link fence by the main opening to the park. He was playing with a few seeds, memorizing their shape and size and feel.
It was one of the days Tepin said they could meet. He had come to the park every other day for almost week, hoping she would show up. But Izzy had waited in vain. She never showed up. Almost giving up hope on his new friend he sighed, the thought that his friend had abandoned him making him to sad to even play with the seeds anymore. Putting them back into the bag he pulled his knees up to his chin and wrapped his arms around them.
Even though he wasn't expecting her, he kept glancing up and combing the streets every now and then.
Today, though, felt different than the other days of waiting. Izzy felt a bit like the ground right before a rain storm, yearning for something.
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 12:28 am
Monday had started as usual: up at seven, breakfast, cleaning Sydni off, and then seeing Vale off to work. After dressing her ‘sister’ and getting ready herself, the plan drastically changed; rather than spending the day watching Sydni, she set off down the street, child in arm. Sydni would be spending the day with the babysitter, and Tepin would get her special outing.
Although, admittedly, she really wasn’t looking forward to it. Too many changes. He wouldn’t even recognize her, she had changed so much. In fact, on the way to the park, she had turned around and started to head home-- only to turn around once more and backtrack her steps.
She had given her word-- that she would be there on Monday. And Tepin was not one to run away. She had to do this. Even if he didn’t believe her, she would calmly explain that she was in the game, and that this was just an unfortunate side effect of playing.
She’d be stern, and confident. After all, nothing had really changed, at least not on the inside.
She spotted him from the corner, seeing the small figure against the fence. It was nerve-wracking. With each step seemed to doubt herself more. Maybe… Maybe she should go back, maybe it’d just be better to keep him in the dark.
No, she had to do this. As her feet stepped through the gate, her mind was made up. She wasn’t going to turn back ever again.
“Uh… Hi.”
This was insane! What was she doing?
“I guess you can’t recognize me, huh?”
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 12:34 am
Izzy looked up at the woman standing before him. Something about her... The determined eyes, now showing hesitation. The black stripe around the eyes...
But there was no way this could be-
She was just-
This was-
No.
"Y-y-you... T-T..." His went a thousand miles a minute. If, by the off chance it really was... how? "Tepin?" He said in a small voice.
His mind drifted. Shut down. He stood up, putting the bag on and began to walk away from the confusing... thing he had just seen.
He had to be dreaming.
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 12:44 am
“No no no no no!!” Her arms stretched out, she began to follow after him, “Don’t go! Don’t go!! It’s me, I swear! A lot of stuff happened!”
A lot of stuff. She had grown around 7 years, yeah. That counted as ‘a lot of stuff’.
“Look! Look--” She caught up, a hand gripping his much shorter shoulder, “I promise I’ll tell you all about it-- just don’t leave!”
Oh, god! What did she get herself into? It would have been so much easier to just stay home! Sure, he’d feel rejected and hurt…--
No. She did the right thing in coming. If Varu had taught her anything, it was that honestly was the best policy.
“Can you just gimme a chance to talk about it?”
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 1:10 am
He could hear her, but the words weren't really registering. As soon as her hand touched his shoulder he got that shock. Izzy stopped walking, hands white-knuckling the strap to his bag. She was in the Game. Is that why... she wasn't... she wasn't Tepin anymore? Slowly, he turned around and looked in her eyes.
"T-Tepin." He said again, face blank. He was still in shock, mind still numb. "W-we should g-g-go somewhere m-more private."
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 1:21 am
She nodded, her face blanching. She knew the boy was shy, she knew he was fragile… But the fact that this had scared--
No. This was normal. His reaction was perfectly normal. She needed to expect this. Not everyone was in the game-- even if he sent her mind tingling… That was just her being nervous, right? Paranoia.
“Yea, I know.” It kinda… hurt. The distance. It had grown so much. No longer did he smile at her, punching the air with all his might. He was scared--
--Scared of what she had become.
Wordlessly, she moved in front of him, each step calm an deliberate as she tried to gather her senses. This-- this was why she had thrown away her name, thrown away her identity. She was a Player now, and that was more important than everything else.
Connections with normal people could be nothing but painful. That was why she had left-- that was why she had run away.
Only when she had cleared the park, looking at a small gap between two buildings, did she wager a look back to see if he had run away.
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 1:29 am
Izzy watched her back as he followed her. Eyes drilling into her. She was Tepin. But she wasn't his Tepin. Or was she? She was a player in the game. That much he was sure of. Totec had said that changes happen. This must have been what he meant...
Would this happen to him? Would he wake up and not be... Izzy anymore? Did it hurt? Had she been in pain?
His eyebrows hitched together. The thought of Tepin in pain bothered him. And the fact that it bothered him made him sure it was still his Tepin.
He'd listen to what she had to say.
Maybe... Maybe he'd tell her that he was in the game too. That...
That they where supposed to fight each other. Face going blank again, he followed her into the alley.
Well, at least this way if she killed him after he told her no one would see it.
She turned around, looking at him tentatively.
Tepin. Tepin Tepin Tepin.
He watched her, waiting. izzy couldn't find his voice yet.
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 1:51 am
She turned, looking at his silhouette against the light of the street. The alleys dimmed her, obscured her.
It was better that way-- maybe then, he could pretend that he had not seen the changes.
“I’m a Player-- in The Game.” It was simple enough to admit, “This…”
That… was no so much. How was she supposed to just pretend it was normal? It was a big deal, even to the other players.
“This happened. Because of my God. I’m… Better now.”
Better. She could run longer, reach higher, go faster. In all ways, her form had been improved. Now she would be more agile, better suited to the violence that The Game demanded.
“It’s not like I tried to hide it--” It was her way. If he found it offensive, if he didn’t like it--
Then… Then--
Then he wasn’t as special as she had thought! If he couldn’t accept her, all of her, then he wasn’t worth it at all!
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 1:58 am
Izzy squinted into the shadows. It was true. He was right. From the horses mouth, as his mother used to say.
"Tepin." His voice came out firm. No stutter was tainting his tongue. "I... I'm a Player too." His breath quickened. His palms got sweaty and he wrung the strap even harder. He could feel the skin starting to peel off his palms.
"I can't say I understand this at all." Eyes closed, he took a deep breath to calm himself down. "But I know you're still... Tepin." He resisted the urge to say his Tepin. "And I'm still Izzy."
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 2:45 am
Her pupils shrunk-- A player. Deep, in the recesses of her mind, she knew.
Attack now. Even if he is weak-- My duty is to fight.
But no. Her eyes closed, and her body seemed to sink against the weight of restraint.
“You know what that means, right?”
Violence.
Competition.
Death.
Even if he was just a child…
No. Because he was just a child. She was no different. Children, chosen by the Gods to determine the best. Their youth, their innocence, their vulnerability was the true reason why they were selected.
Gods had no pity for the weak.
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 2:43 pm
Izzy opened his eyes. Watched her struggle with something, watched as her eyes closed. The ground pulsed with electricity to him. Pushing up through his body saying 'run, fight, run, fight'.
What's what they were meant to do. Fight. It was all a Game. She knew this and he knew this, and he could feel the pull to do something, anything to defend himself.
Fear washed through him. It stung all of his nerves then made them numb. He couldn't feel the pain in his palms anymore.
She was supposed to kill him.
And he was supposed to kill her. That's what it means.
Izzy began to shake, tears streaming down his face. He didn't want to kill her. To hurt her.
Taking a step forward, head bowed, he sighed out his answer:
"That we should fight. That one of us should die. But...you're my friend..." His voice trailed off. Izzy had lost his voice again, mind blank.
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 2:56 pm
“I don’t want to fight.” Her voice cracked, it was all too apparent that The Game was too much for her, “I don’t even want to play.”
She was relieved-- Someone, another Player, even, had told her not to fight. He, too, was defying the standards that they were supposed to uphold. He had done it so easily, when she would have bent under the pressure of The Game.
She didn’t know what to do! The Game told her to fight, but she did not want to! It told her to be strong, and tough, and alert-- But she didn’t want to be any of those things!
But she didn’t want to be useless, she didn’t want to be hated.
If she did not adhere to the standards she was held to… Then she was a failure as a Godling. Then everyone would look down upon her again. But--
But she didn’t want to fight.
“I just…” She was breaking down, there was too much pressure, “I don’t know what to do.”
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 4:09 pm
Wathing her, he wanted to go near her. To hug this new Tepin. They weren't going to fight. It was impossible. Improbable. It didn't add up in his head. How could they? The game told them too, but the Game wasn't the only thing in life... was it? Sure, that was their new purpose now. But it didn't dictate every single part of their lives. They were still some part human.
He slowly walked forward, arms out until he had them wrapped around her. He was just a kid, and she was just a kid. But being players made them more than just kids now.
"N-nobody knows what t-to do." His stutter returning, a sign of normality. "But we c-can figure it out."
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Posted: Sun May 03, 2009 7:55 pm
He fit perfectly-- he was so small, now. Her arms wrapped around him, head dropping until it rested against his spiky brown hair.
No one knew? Did that mean… She wasn’t alone? Wasn’t the only one lost and confused?
Did he understand her?
There wasn’t anything to say, no words could really encompass the great feelings of appreciation that she had for this small child. Even despite his fear, and his hesitation…
He was able to step forward, and keep looking on to the future. Even if he was uncertain, he could take that step into the unknown, and figure out where to go from there.
“I’m scared.”
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Posted: Mon May 04, 2009 4:22 pm
Her acceptance of him made him almost smile. They would continue to be friends, no matter what. For once, holding this suddenly bigger Tepin, he felt strong and protective. Unlike the stuttering, frightened kid in the park.
"B-being scared i-is all p-part of it, I think."
Fear was something he lived with, everyday. Fear of everything. He understood fear, maybe even more than those that faced everything head on. He knew the consequences of being afriad. But Izzy also knew the advantages.
"A-and it'd okay t-to be afraid."
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