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 Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2008 9:29 am
Guinevere was not wearing black.
She was not wearing midnight or mystical shadow or any other such colour either. She was wearing a faded brown dress that did not look magical at all, and made her look a bit like a mud puddle after the rain. But she didn't want to look witchy, for once in her young life.
She blinked nervously, and held onto the gift she had brought. Clearing her throat, she began, "Well, I happened to be in the neighbourhood..." and stopped.
"I was just passing by, and..."
"Say, Nikolai..."
"Look, I'm sorry about what happened..."
She sighed. Maybe she had better just forget about her next move and get on with her first one. Reaching up with one delicate hand, she knocked on the front door carefully.
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Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2008 1:00 pm
Within a few moments the door opened to reveal a very tired looking Jade wearing an equally tired looking smile. "Guinevere, it's good to see you again." She murmured softly. In one hand she had an oven mit, and sitting on the oven mit was a hot bowl of soup she'd only just finished making. The smell of home-made soup filled the appartment, though it alone seemed to indicate the little Herald's condition hadn't gotten better.
"Come inside, I'm just about to bring Nikolai some lunch." So distracted with her preparations, Jade hadn't noticed the muddy colored dress or the present Guin had brought for her little boy. Leaving the door open for Guin, she went down the little hall to Nikolai's room and went inside first.
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Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2008 1:12 pm
Guinevere stepped inside the doorway, blue eyes full of worry. Jade looked tired as she had a week ago, and the whole house seemed to have a downtrodden atmosphere. Her wings gave a nervous flutter as she followed Jade, and her hands clutched the basket she had brought even tighter, till her knuckles were white and showed starkly against her brown dress. She stepped into Nikolai's room cautiously, lifting the basket against her chest as if to offer Nikolai a shield between him and her.
"Hello." she said to the other Herald quietly. "How are you feeling?"
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Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2008 2:08 pm
Tucked in tightly after a fit from his fever, Nikolai lay on his back with a cloth on his head and a bright red color settled in his cheeks. He did look sick; though most of it he'd been unconscious through. What time he had been awake Nikolai was able to sit and think about what he'd learned. Things were coming back a little more clearly after the vision, but he was still quite mute when Guin addressed him.
Placing the soup on a bed tray, Jade took out the spoon and blew softly to cool it for Nikolai. "Aren't you going to say something?" She coaxed, looking sadly at Nikolai and took hold of his hand.
Whining softly, the little boy turned to look at Guin and the cloth slipped sideways on his head. Opening his mouth, Nikolai's lips trembled slightly before it closed once more and he reached out his hand to Guin.
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Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2008 2:41 pm
Guinevere paused for a moment and walked over to Nikolai's bedside, reaching out a hand to his. She looked at him for a moment, trying to figure out the answer to her question for herself.
It appeared to be 'Not that great'.
Remembering her gift, Guinevere withdrew her hand from Nikolai's. "Ah!" she said, pulling out the basket. Inside there was a radio filched from Kotatsu's kitchen counter. Kotatsu was a woman who had largely been untroubled by the 21st century, and things like television, cars, and computers had whizzed over her head, briefly noted but never really touched upon fully. Thus these things also eluded Guinevere, and things like the radio were the only way she really heard other voices at home. She took it out and showed it to Nikolai. "You don't have to take it, but I thought maybe you'd like to hear it..." she said hesitantly. "The music, and the people talking, I mean." Continuing, she said "It really helped me after Aaron left, just to listen to people talk about little things and argue with each other and to hear music so I thought maybe you'd like it." She bit her lip. "You don't have to take it if you don't want it."
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Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2008 2:55 pm
Worried as to what Nikolai would do in reaction to this, Jade put down the spoon back into the bowl. As she moved to take the radio from Guin to put it away, she was stunned with what happened next.
"Tha..... thank.. you."
His hand that had been held out to her didn't yeild any more visions. She didn't make him return to his moment of torture. Guin wasn't the cause of his painful past memories... and that was enough to make him smile faintly. Still reaching out, he touched the radio she held out to him and looked over it thoughtfully without another word. Nikolai's voice had been hoarse, but at least he was truly grateful that it was not Guin's fault for what happened.
Still, there was so much he needed to sort out on his own. Somehow... listening to the radio didn't seem like it would help matters much. Withdrawing his hand, Nikolai looked to Guin's face without actually seeing her; he was beginning to think of things most children didn't. Beginning to remember things that he didn't want to remember. Biting his lower lip, the boy lowered his eyes to the bedsheets and rested back against his pillow.
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Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2008 3:07 pm
An unreadable expression flickered over Guinevere's face, and she felt her chest tighten. Somehow, even though he had spoken aloud to her, he seemed farther away than ever. "You're welcome." she said in the polite voice she had been raised to use in response to any thank you at any given moment. She looked at Nikolai again. Every time she saw him lately he seemed different from the last time she had seen him. Vaguely, she wished she could catch up to him.
But in an equally vague way, she suspected he was in a place that was wholly his own; If Guinevere were to try to catch up, she would end up rocketing along her own dark tunnel of memories.
A faint chill ran down her spine at the thought, as the lingering scent of death seemed to cling to her. Scissors and ribbon and blood.
Shaking her head, she came back to the here and now. She hesitated and looked at Nikolai's expression. Lifting her hand again, she placed it on the bed next to him, a lifeline to the present if he felt the urge to come back from wherever his thoughts were.
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Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2008 3:28 pm
Nikolai didn't seem to notice the hand at first and closed his eyes with a sigh before turning to look at his mother.
"Not hungry?"
A shake of his head.
"Maybe we'll try again later..." Jade reluctantly picked up the tray from the bed and stood. Casting a nervous look to Guin, Jade hoped she would not once again make her little boy cry. Not wanting to say something to the little girl that would make her feel bad-- she was clearly sorry after all-- Jade made her way out of the room to let them both talk.
Nikolai shifted a little and pulled his covers from his chest. The fluffy pajamas that Jade put him in were stuffy while he was sick, and he stretched his wings a bit when he sat up. Looking at Guin, a world of questions shown racing through his mind just behind his multicolored eyes. None of which really managed to make it to his mouth-- though he understood why he would not speak now, he couldn't bring himself to really use his voice. Something inside still held back his words, and Nikolai was still frightened of causing someone else pain. Turning towards his desk, the boy pointed towards his sketch pad that was on top along with a box of crayons. Perhaps he would try to write out his words? Maybe then both of them could come to an understanding.
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Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2008 2:43 pm
Guinevere moved to follow Jade, unsure that she was ready to be alone with Nikolai again so soon. "Ah..." she said, but Jade was gone. Nervously, she turned back and saw Nikolai pointing at his sketchpad insistently. She felt a bubble of worry rise up inside her, but she reached for it. Shutting her eyes tightly, her hands clamped around the paper.
Nothing happened.
Brathing a sigh of relief that she tried not to make obvious, she pulled the sketchpad and crayons carefully towards Nikolai. She didn't know what he intended to do with them, but whatever it was, she hoped she wouldn't end up hurting him again.
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Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2008 3:49 pm
Taking them gratefully, Nikolai smiled even as the damp cloth that had been on his forehead fell away to the covers beside him. Carefully he drew out a blue crayon and began to write on the first blank page he came to.
I'm sorry I made you upset.
Nikolai held it up for her to see, then began to scribble again.
My past is my past... I shouldn't be scared of it when there's nothing I can do to change it.
It seemed, even for a child, Nikolai had already grown to accept these adult ideas that he'd remembered from his former life. Words were painful and one should be careful of them, and no matter how much wishing he did, he had still brought about the message of someone's death. That was how he became a fallen Herald, and that was all there was to that.
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Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 2:46 pm
Guinevere looked at Nikolai and nodded grimly. "You didn't make me upset." she reassured him. She looked down at her hands, trying to phrase her next words carefully.
"I think... Well, I was upset because I hurt you." she said slowly, "But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I was mostly upset because I was too weak to protect you." She frowned. "It should have been something that I could handle on my own. If I hadn't let fear get the better of me, we wouldn't be here right now." Looking at Nikolai again, she concluded "Whatever happened, I don't believe it was directly caused by either of us. But spending all the time that I do waiting for something paranormal to happen and then realizing that it could harm someone for the first time..." She bit her lip. "It wasn't a pleasant wake up call. And because I needed a wake up call, someone I cared for went through something they shouldn't have. So I should be apologizing. Not you."
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Posted: Thu Jan 01, 2009 8:54 am
The little Herald gave a weak smile and underlined part of what he'd written before.
My past is my past.
By now Nikolai's fever was starting to get the better of him, and while he tried to hide it, the lad's breathing was more of a pant than anything else. Taking hold of his sketchbook, the boy started to write once more.
I wanted to know what my dreams were about. I still want to know. The dreams get more and more detailed since the
He stopped, trying to think of a word for it. 'Accident' would seem mean, and 'vision' didn't really sound quite right. After a moment, he wrote down the last word.
the then.
Looking Guin in the eyes, Nikolai's expression changed to a serious one. He held onto his sketchbook and wrote one last thing on the page.
Will you help me find out more? About me and all the other Heralds?
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Posted: Thu Jan 01, 2009 9:17 am
Guinevere's face paled.
She had been worried about this.
She didn't want Nikolai to ask her this question. She didn't know what to say. What could she say? Nikolai was curious about Heralds, and this time they had seen Nikolai's memories. She was curious about their origins, of course she was. If they looked again, would they see hers? There were some things she didn't feel like she could handle. Remembering her own sacrifice. Being a victim, always a victim, because of the sacrifice, because of the pain, and because of the stupid, stupid wings. She had just gotten over being a tragic character. It was a place she didn't want to go back to. Plus she might see Aaron again.
She might see Aaron again.
She paused. It wasn't a smart reason for agreeing, she knew.It would only hurt her in the long run, she knew this too. It would be like throwing herself against a wall again.
But there would be the possibility. And for a brief moment, maybe, just maybe, she could see the familiar face that was getting so foggy in her memory. It would hurt, but to just once see him again, even if it was a lie or a memory or a mirage was something Guinevere had been longing for.
Plus Nikolai would be there, right? If she could help Nikolai, it would all be worth it. She wanted to help him find the answer to his problems. She liked Nikolai. And his investigations might cause him to go through more unpleasant experiences. Having someone there could help him.
Trying to convince herself that her motives weren't totally selfish, she nodded. "Anything I can do, Nikolai." she told him. "I will help you."
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Posted: Thu Jan 01, 2009 9:56 am
"Thank you...." The smile that appeared on his face was a little warmer than before, though his cheeks were still bright red from fever. Setting down his sketch pad, the boy grasped the bedpost and moved to pull himself onto unstable feet. Still in warm fleece pajamas, he let go of the headboard carefully. Still very weak, he made his way wobbily over to his dresser drawers and started sifting through them. Finding whatever it was, he clutched it to his chest and headed for the window. Even if he was sick, Nikolai was determined to find out more now that he'd gotten Guinevere to help him. That courage seemed to shine even despite the aches and chills in his body. Pushing open the window Nikolai spread his wings and headed out onto the balcony before looking back at Guin with the same warm smile from before. He extended his hand, hoping she would come with him.
It might have been foolish, but he'd seen so much in recent dreams and now he wanted to piece it together. The places he'd seen were from the air. The man who'd all but sealed his voice he'd seen too; and sadly recognised.
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Posted: Thu Jan 01, 2009 10:18 am
Guinevere's eyes widened. She may have wanted to see Aaron again, but some things were more important than loved ones who had moved on.
"Nikolai, no." she said, rushing over to him. "You're not ready for this, you're ill." She hated to do it after what she had just promised him. "I promised to help you no matter what, but it's possible this could be dangerous. If something happened to you..." She shuddered. Seeing his face after the first time had been bad enough. "If something happened to you, I would never forgive myself." She looked at him determinedly. "We will investigate this, but I want to start when you're feeling better." If they were going to do something potentially dangerous despite the fact they were both children with hardly any means of protecting themselves, she was going to make sure they did it SENSIBLY. If Kotatsu's raising her and the events of a week ago had taught her anything, it was that she was going to have to be more responsible about running off into magic and danger.
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