Emily's 100 Themes (Broken)

[Serenity Reed]

1 Introduction

It's funny how people forget so quickly. Even now, though the wound is still so fresh, I find myself slowly losing my grip on the things I felt then, when the wound was just inflicted.

And I'm losing grip, too, on sanity. That wound was so deep; it carved out everything but left with nothing.

I'm full of nothing and everything, because I met you.

 

[Serenity Reed]

2 Love

I knew I loved him right when I last saw him.

That seems a bad time to realize something like that, that you love someone. I'll never see him again, in this lifetime, but that pain isn't so deep as the thought that I'll have to wait to see him again when it's finally over.

My first thought, that last time I saw him, when he left, was love. I loved him so deeply, and I knew it then, when I ran away. Now I wish I could have told him before. Before he left. I could have smiled and said, "I love you." I know he would have smiled and hugged me back.

Now, his name is always on my lips. I can't stop sighing. Because I loved him, I'd always feel the pain in my heart, even after it faded to a mere echo of melancholy.

 

[Serenity Reed]

3 Light

I remember that he had his own light. It was pure and sad, a light made of life. His presence wasn't a shadow, but a beacon. He was a lighthouse, shining over my dark, rolling waves. He was that for us all. His smile was kind, and his strength was beautiful.

And even though he's gone, somehow that light is still with me. Still, I can feel warmth, and the changes he left behind for me. Will they fade? I shouldn't wish them to stay, for I know they will eventually leave me.

Not even such light can stay for too long, when the lamp is put out.

 

[Serenity Reed]

4 Dark

Of course, I always lived in the dark, and silence was my friend. I could not comprehend light, at times, even when I saw him. Then, during those shadows, I become something far from beautiful, and I even went so far as to try to block out his light.

You can't help everyone.

You can't expect anyone to love you.

There are people you cannot reach; why even bother with it?

But he never stopped. When I wasn't looking, and didn't even know. Even when I was looking, he kept it up.

Where did that strength come from?

 

[Serenity Reed]

5 Seeking Solace

But when he left.... Where could I go? I was such a blighting shadow, I felt I could go no where.

There was no place left for me, was there?

Is there?

That can't be right. I have a heart, even though it is crippled.

So I'll get better.

 

[Serenity Reed]

6 Break Away

I had branched off long ago.

I became independent when I was much younger than I am now. And whenever someone goes, I can let go. I have to face death, and the end of school, sometime. It's not like I can make people stay just by clinging to them. I'll have to give up everyone one day.

Why shouldn't that day be now? Why not let people go now and save the inevitable hurt?

 

[Serenity Reed]

7 Heaven

I have heard some say that heaven lies where your heart lies.

Well, if that's true, then I lost part of mine with him. Even though I meant to let go of everyone, the truth is that I gave pieces of my heart away silently, secretly, to the people I loved. I can't escape that. I've given myself away and, well, part of me will never return. But I can fill it back up, can't I?

Yes; I will fill it again with the pieces of heart others give me. And my heaven will be here with me, and far in the sky.