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 Posted: Sun Aug 24, 2008 9:19 am
The sun broke through clouds of gray as the day proceeded to a slow start. If one would stare in the distance persistently he could almost see a faint tremble in the air which was no tremble. In fact it was the first snowflakes of the first snow of the year. It was cold, truth be said and one who would stand outside would surely notice that without much trouble.
Allen Walker, now, was sitting by the window, in one of the armchairs in the living room, curled up in a blanket and holding a newspaper in his hands. He had been trying really hard to keep up with the news. His long sleep between his life and his resurection as a ghost -or a charm dragon most accurately- had messed him up a little regarding his sense of what had hapenned a long time ago and what not.
The reason he was up at this time, when nobody else was awake was a comlicated one. It was his nightmare. That reccuring nightmare from which he'd wake up sweating and panting to catch his breath, his voice drowned in his throat unable to scream. It felt almost like dying way and over again. And still... he really didn't want to speak about it to anyone... He'd be only worrying them and after all there was no way to stop it or find out what it was...
So there he was. Comfortably curled up in a ball, hidden behind the paper curtain of the newspaper he was holding and the comfortably gentle weight of Timcanpy at the top of his head. The clock against him, hanging on the wall showed that the time was still only five thirty in the morning.
A yawn escaped him at the realization as he stretched his limbs, follwed by a small sigh.
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Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 9:07 am
In the past five weeks, Rynl and Lavi had come to know alot about three of their new guests, mainly of their deaths, how Len had been defiled and brutally murdered and how Dino....well, it was too gruesome for words alot like Casey's death except the killer tried to clean up) they also found out just why Rynl thought he looked familiar ('A mob boss!? I'm housing a mob boss!?' Were the beach blondes words before he fainted). And Allen, the ghost had yet to remember Lavi at all, always telling him things from hislife as if Lavi hadn't been there at all, afterwards, Lavi would go into the study, Rynl the only one sane enough to follow. That was also were Lavi was now, back in the study, watching Rynl furiously type away at his computer, which just a week ago had finally been given a working internet connection.(the only problem with this was getting Rynl to go eat and shop for groceries) There was a third being in the room though, last night Dino had knoecked on the door, asking if he could come in, claiming to want to read a book, only to fall asleep not even five seconds after he sat down. He's just lonely and probably a bit depressed, he did just die after all. Lavi had complained that he hadn't been depressed or lonely, and Rynl had replied with 'because your a bookman. What, did your old age make you forget that?' Lavi had promptly threw a book at him.
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Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 10:15 am
Allen pushed himself off from his seat, heading for the study to exchange his newspaper with another one. As of lately the fuzz was all about some strange serial killer that would never leave any evidence behind. They called him the 'Phantom Thief Sai' and there were absolutely no leads as to his whereabouts. Allen was kinda tired and it made him depressed to read of murders all the time.
His footsteps echoed slightly in the hallway as he walked ahead. Openning the door to the study he was surprised to find another resident of the house awake, to add to his unluckyness it was Lavi, the one person who he less wanted to see, basically because he always made him feel a mess. He could never remember him in his life. Not his face, voice or actions. Then again it didn't make any sense that he would not remember at all. He really wondered if Lavi was lying. Maybe he didn't know him at all, or maybe he did mean a lot to him. It always confused Allen.
What was the other expecting him to do, really? It felt odd. Almost every conversation the two of them had ended up in Lavi locking himself up in the study, not comming out or in fact talking to anyone for at least the remainder of the day.
Other than him, Rynl also was awake and Dino, the Usagi Yokai, who was in fact doing nothing but sleeping peacefully, face down on a book.
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Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 10:03 pm
"H-hey Allen." Lavi said nervously, getting up to adjust the sleeping usagi yokai into a more comfortable position. Of all the creatures in the house it was no surprise when they discovered Dino to be as alive as Casey and Verissimo, being yokai it wasn't too much of a shock, (though Lavi could have sworn he saw Dino's eyes glint with something akin to hope, about what the red head had no idea). After making sure the rabbit was comfortable -dammit, Rynl had turned him into a mother hen-, he turned to Allen. "Something ya need moyashi-chan?"
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Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 10:34 pm
Allen shook his head. He wasn't very willing to speak right now. He was wide awake though and this was obvious. He hoped this would make uncomfortable questions rise on Lavi's or Rynl's part. Up to that day he had avoided getting caught... but now... a soft sigh escaped his lips.
"I was just bringing back those newspapers..." he mumbled going to set them down near a pile of other, simillar papers. Going through the pile to pick a different one out, his eyes, inevitably even when he tried to avoid it, fell on Lavi and their eyes met briefly. His silver stare momentarilly clashed with that always so intensive emerald green eye which Allen was pretty sure it could always see right through him. Through his very soul. He always felt weak under that stare, as if he was stripped of all that was private to him.
He quickly lowered his eyes back to the pile of newspapers. He didn't want the other to know just how much his dreams troubled him and he sincerely hoped he understood nothing. Quickly turning around, picking the new newspaper along he headed for the study's door, sincerely hoping -agaiin- that the other wouldn't stop him. Thing that he already knew wouldn't happen due to some simillar occurences in the past weeks.
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Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2008 9:12 am
Lavi didn't know why, but he just couldn't let Allen leave so soon." Allen, wait." He called out, not sounding pathetic in the slightest thank you. What was that look in the other spirit's eyes? Did Lavi scare him somehow? "Moyashi...ya alright?" He asked coming closer.
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Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2008 10:15 am
Allen fretted and turned halfway around, looking at Lavi over his shoulder. His eyes looked like those of a scared animal, pursued and pushed against a wall. It wasn't fear and it wasn't any form of sadness, the feeling reflected in his eyes... it was desperation. "I'm alright..." he mumbled half-heartedly, not even slightly reacting to being called moyashi, thing that usually hapenned.
Almost as if Lavi's approach triggered something inside of him, he made a couple of hurried steps towards the doorway but his newspapaer slipped from his hands and fell on the floor making him snap out of it. What was he doing? What was he going to do? Was he losing his sanity? Why? How...? Why did he react like this whenever tried to suddently get closer to him. What was this?
Quickly turning backwards to Lavi's direction he shook his head, and bent down to gather the pages that were now scattered along the hallway.
"I'm sorry... I'm alright..." he repeated under his breath. But was he really?
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Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2008 12:35 pm
Allen's behavior was really beginning to concern Lavi, why was he acting so out of it. Helping gather the pages up, Lavi handed them back to Allen. "Ya don't seem alright. Wanna talk? Rynl's too busy to listen and Dino is asleep."" And Allen needed to someone to talk to in a serious discussion, and neither blonde was much help at the moment.
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Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2008 12:53 pm
Allen sighed. He was about to blurt out another 'I'm okay' but the words didn't want to be willing to leave his throat, suffocating him. Or was it his denial that was killing him from the inside...? He couldn't know. He sighed softly and leaned his back against the wall, finally giving in to his 'fate'.
"I'm not alright..." he mumbled quietly, hugging his newspaper close to his chest.
"Everything seems out of place and I just can;t get the why they do. There are memories in my mind just missing things, people... in the same fashion I can't remember you... Feelings things make me feel but I don't know why... faces that appear familliar but are not..." he shook his head. He didn;t make much sense.
"And I'm always having that dream. The dream that I never remember." he sighed. "I fear I'm losing my sanity."
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Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2008 8:29 pm
"Your not losing your sanity moyashi-chan, your still 'lost', as a way to put it. You only came into awareness a month ago ne?" But Lavi doubted his own words, thinking it odd Allen could regain his memories so quickly. That didn't concern him right then though, he was more worried about these 'nightmares'. "Do you remember...how you felt when you had them?" He heard the typing on the keyboard slow, and indication Rynl was now paying attention, but still working.
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Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2008 9:25 pm
Allen lowered his head. He'd love to lie so much right now. Say everything was alright... but nothing was alright and Lavi was just being so gentle on that moment that it almost managed to break through Allen's walls of keeping others at bay. Lowering his head to hide behind lock of snow white hair he didn't want to look directly at the other when speaking those words.
"I felt lonely... and so very sad..." he mumbled. "I- I felt like..." he paused and shook his head, he couldn't really remember anything from that dream, but the feeling it would left lingering behind. "I felt like dying..." a violent tremble rushed down his spine and he sighed, pushing against the wall as if he wanted to sink into it and dissapear. He was troubling the other without even a good reason to... he felt bad about that too, but the worst thing was the clench on his heart, tightening.
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Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 12:26 am
Dieing, the one thing most spirits tended to lose fear of, they were already dead after all. But to have a dream that brought out such powerful emotions, to bring forth a fear that should no longer exist, that was quite worrisome. "I'm sure it's nothing Allen. Probably just a really bad dream about watching one of your friends die." He hated to lie to the kid, but Lavi wanted to keep as much stress from piing up as possible, though he could feel Rynl's eyes boring into the back of his head, as if telling him to not lie.
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Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:00 am
Allen shook his head. He really wanted to believe Lavi but then again it wasn't normal to fear such a fear by just watching another person die. He sighed... then again it couldn't be his death either since he could not remember it. Suddently as if a lock was just broken in his head an image flashed into his head. It was but for a moment... but...
"Maybe so..." he mumbled a reply. He really wanted to believe Lavi... but... but he couldn't believe him. His head dropped further as he made a step in the other's direction, comming almost too close.
"May I...?" he trailled off in barely audible voice, slumping his head softly against the other's chest, in need to hold on from something not to break down completely. Even though he had willingly leaned against Lavi and the warmth Lavi emanated was more than just welcoming, especially on a cold morning such as this, Allen felt that sudden sting of pain as every nerve in his body reacted upon touch making him want to jerk away from the other and run into safety. He couldn't explain why his body reacted that way... even so he gritted his teeth and forced himself to stay still as he suddently felt too weak to even move an inch.
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Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:27 am
Despite that he wanted the other there, to stay for a little while longer, Lavi reluctantly let him go. "Can you...just come to me or him if you have one of these nightmares again?" From how it sounded, any little detail that Allen could remember could come of use.
Oh boy, it seemed Lavi was falling into an old pattern, how for Rynl that he'd have to knock the old man down a few pegs. 'Could I be anymore sarcastic?' He knew there wasn't really a need to interfere, since now that Lavi was dead the rules of the Bookman clan no longer applied, yet Rynl couldn't help but want to interfere. 'Could it be i'm jealous? No, that's just ridiculous, jealous of a dead person who has one hundred and fifteen years over me, ha!' Sadly Rynl at the time didn't know how close he was to the truth.
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Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 11:03 am
Allen nodded his head a little. "Do you think it has to do with the memories I'm missing?" the question escaped him before he was able to shut his mouth and not blurt it out. He looked away. "Never mind." he mumbled turning around.
"I might go for a walk, the cool air might help me cool my head..." he suddently said before he reached the other end of the hallway. Secretely he hoped the other would come with him. He didn;t feel like spending the cold morning al by himself. Then again... it was cold, so...
"On second thought..." he sighed. "Maybe not." that being said he dragged his feet to the kitchen to make some tea. If he was awake anyway he might want to try having breakfast instead of freezing outside.
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