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 Posted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 5:25 am
Azarax often wondered how the Traditionalist Firekin were coping with their defeat. The loss of the war meant that they had lost their homeland. And they had lost to those that, for so long, had been deemed inferior to them. Still, somehow, they persisted. Their faith in Finar-si remained.
How was that so?
It had been proven, time and time again, that their trust in their goddess was useless. None of them had ever, ever seen her before in their lifetime. She had not aided them at the time of their greatest need, so how could they still believe in her?
The desert pelted lion felt his gaze once more drifte toward the horizon, to the very spot where he had last seen Ripuka and Jua, as they fled from the victorious rebels. He often found himself wishing that, at least, he knew where they had taken refuge.
He found that his mother, whom he had every reason and right to despise, still often appeared when he slept. Her fire red image had haunted him every night since before he could remember, and had left him wondering who she was and what she wanted with him. Ever since he had discovered who she was, she had appeared less and less.
But with the rebellion, that had changed. She had returned, as wordless as ever. She simply stood, floating in the black abyss of nothingness in his mind, watching him.
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Posted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:50 am
Uncertain of how well received she might be if she remained antisocial, Lilo knew her best bet was to at least try to mingle a bit. She didn't have her family to hide behind now. So she went out for a walk, within view of the busier areas of the pride but keeping her distance, trying to feel for anything that was still going on before just running around. She did spot on lion, one with very odd, very sandy looking fur but a familiar color mane. He didn't appear to be right in the middle of things; in fact, he looked about as spaced out as Lilo felt.
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Posted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 5:17 pm
((I just realized, Azzie knows Lilo's sister xD Savitri))
Those markings around his eyes, he had once been told, rather seemed like trails of tears running down his face. He had been young then, and the idea had drawn a laugh out of him. Tears, indeed.
Now, he wondered if the lion had been right. Was he forever to be burdened to loss, ignorance, stubbornness... Those were causes for tears. The only bright thin that had happened to him was the rebellion. Bright for him, but not for others. Which meant his joy had led to his own sadness. His family, if he could even truly call them that, was gone.
And though he praised the change that Kidondo and his rebel forces had swept through the desert lands, he still constantly found himself wishing that just one of them had listened and changed their mind.
"It's not their fault," He muttered to himself, completely unaware of the lioness nearby. "They were taught that way. It's hard to change. You couldn't ask me to change to view life in their way..."
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Posted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 9:38 pm
(( xD haha. ))
Daring to be social, to prove to herself she was malleable and could do this, she approached the stranger. He was larger than her, full grown, and of course he was off in his own little world- perhaps not the safest of lions to approach, startling someone bigger wasn't likely to go well. Lilo was very quickly close enough to catch what he said. The stare and the words gave it a context easily enough, the rebellion was just ending- life was changing for some and others stubbornly went on their way. Simple.
"They'll figure it out sooner or later," she said, not really caring who specifically he was talking about because it really applied to everyone. Hopefully they'd figure it out before it was too late, though it was already quite late with the division.
"Hello," Lilo added so as not to seem completely intrusive.
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Posted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:24 pm
He was not a particularly jumpy lion, but the sudden voice beside him surprised him, and his head snapped to his right to catch sight of the voice's owner. An adolescent lioness, probably not too much younger than himself, stood nearby. Her size and the way she was built told him that she had been born within the Firekin lands, most likely she was one. He could see the white and black points in her coat, though the rest was grayed out by his vision. He suspected she was some shade of red, though without the brightness that allowed his eyes to perceive the color.
"Hello," He said with a polite nod. "They'll figure it out? You think?"
Perhaps she was right, perhaps they would figure it out. Some of them would, he knew that, but the others... Somehow he couldn't find himself imagining that all of them would realize what was wrong. It wouldn't happen, he knew. They would simply brood within themselves until they simply faded away to nothing.
"Who knows... Maybe they will." He added after a moment.
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Posted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 4:15 pm
"Those that don't won't last too long," she said with a small shrug, looking off in the distance and thinking about her mother and sisters briefly- but more sincerely she thought about Wakia. His mother was the main reason he wasn't here, or so she figured. He hadn't seemed entirely opposed to the rebels before she lost track of him. "They're the losing side of a war, and inbreeding won't get them very far, will it?"
Umlilo did not know a great deal about genetics, few lions did. But there had to be reasons that inbreeding wasn't more common, or closer inbreeding than was usual. And she was taking another assuming step into the conversation, though she was quite confident.
"I'm Umlilo," she introduced herself, taking a seat in the sand and glancing from the distance to the stranger.
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Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2008 1:45 am
"But they don't know that," He said rather sadly, with a small shake of his head. "They think themselves better than all others for their bloodlines. Who's to say they'll realize inbreeding will eventually destroy them?"
He thought back, to his first impression of Ripuka. It hadn't changed since he had first found out who she was. She was still that Traditionalist story teller who would do everything in her power to keep her grip on her beliefs. It made sense to her, even though it made no sense at all to him.
But they were on different sides of the playing field. He was on this side. She was on that, and while she was still over there, there was little chance that she would be open to seeing change.
"My name is Azarax," He replied, her voice pulling him out of his reverie. "Pleasure to meet you, Umlilo." He added with a small smile. There was something about her that reminded him vaguely of someone else. Who that was, he couldn't quite put a paw on, but something about her struck a chord.
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Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2008 11:44 am
"Pride comes at a high price," she shrugged thoughtfully, she knew that some- if not most- would stubbornly cling to their ways, would refuse to see the inevitable truth so long as it meant they still existed and did not have to face those who figured it out sooner. All firekin were proud, but the best off of the bunch certainly seemed to be the rebels. Even if you ignored the inbreeding issue, they won the fight and had the best reason to be proud.
"At least we don't have to worry about those things now, Azarax," Lilo said finally, changing the subject of the conversation from the losses of the traditionalists to the gains of the rebels. She didn't sound so perfectly convinced or completely confident, though. She was angry with her family but she wasn't wishing death upon them. But more importantly, her only friend was there still. It was something she was sure applied to many of them, family and friends divided.. she certainly couldn't be the only one on her own for the first time.
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Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2008 5:32 pm
Azarax nodded his agreement. "I wish it didn't have to end up like this, with a split, but you're right. At least we don't have to worry anymore. We're not caught up in foolish beliefs." He watched her as she spoke. Something about the way she had said it seemed odd.
"You don't sound convinced," He said after a moment. He knew that tone of voice. He had used it once or twice before. "Did your family split?" He asked, thinking of his own. It was only he that was on this side. But then again, Wakia and Jua, they had both been raised by possibly one of the most traditionalist lioness of the Firekin.
And after all, it was childhood that mattered most in affecting life. They had learned no other way, and they had been taught that their beliefs, somehow, worked. Somehow they were the best. Even if they did lose the war. They still thought they were the best.
At least, that was how Azarax saw it. He was only an outsider to their ways, and where he saw fault, most of them would not. He couldn't put himself in their paws, he wouldn't ever be able to understand how they could believe, even after all that had happened. He didn't have that kind of grasp and faith in belief.
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Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2008 11:34 pm
Umlilo nodded, smiling slightly when he described exactly what she had meant. She didn't care about the split, in her opinion it was almost better that way. Old and cranky lions clinging to tradition were not needed around here! Or so she told herself, deciding to ignore that her decision was made out of spite for her family. Or rather her mother had helped her to realize sticking with family was not going to benefit her at all. Had the rebellion been completely foolish in the eyes of the young lioness she would have found another way. She was slightly startled when Azarax both caught and recognized the tone in her voice.
"Yes, my family split," she said with a shrug, "I'm the only one who came to this side that I know of so far. My mother definitely didn't stay, nor did my sisters. Who knows about my father, though."
She paused.
"I can't say I miss them too much, though. My concern is greater for a friend," Lilo clarified somewhat, "You are very observant. Did your family go? Is that who you were talking about?"
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Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 2:20 am
"I'm sorry," He said, with a slight tilt of his head. The shrug probably meant that she was trying her best not to care. Perhaps she had even convinced herself that she didn't. But it would always come back. One of these days, she would miss her family, even if it was just a little, and for that, he was sorry.
"A friend?" He echoed. As good as anyone to miss, a friend. Sometimes friends came through more than family. To some, friends were more important. Perhaps Umlilo was one of those. Either way, simply having someone to miss was better than having none. Somehow, the feeling of absence connected you to this world. Showed that there was something still anchoring you tight to life.
Azarax nodded. "Yes. Kind of," He corrected himself. They were his family biologically, but emotionally, he couldn't really and truly call them that. They were lions he was related to, and somehow still felt a strong connection to, but they were not truly his family. That title fell with Mpaji. "My... mother, my sister, my brother, they fled with the rest of the Traditionalists. But my family is here. Still... I wonder."
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Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 1:53 pm
She didn't respond to his apology with regard to her family, she did have herself convinced she did not care anymore. Ignoring complete that the fact she was so angry meant she really did, of course. She was happy to brush it off and worry herself more about the fact her one real friend was not around. She was also curious about that slave they had run into that was trying to flee in the midst of all the fighting, but other than those things this, being even a little social, was her main concern.
"Yes, I suspect he would be here if he knew I'd stayed," she said, not thinking through the comment entirely until she said it, "I mean, when we spoke he seemed not completely opposed to the rebellion. I would have stayed out of obligation to my family, had she wanted me to stay, I imagine that might apply to several of those who left. The ones who will wise up."
She tilted her head when he gave an almost contradicting answer. But it was easy to recognize that he could have his own family, though Lilo never thought of something like adoption.
"You have your own family?"
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Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 7:00 pm
"Really? It's nice to know some of them might someday realize that their ways simply don't work," The fact that Umlilo knew a Traditionalist who didn't seem entirely opposed to the rebellion meant that there was, at least, some hope that some of them would join their side. But then again, nothing was set in stone, so there was little Azarax could do but to keep his hopes from rising too high.
He shook his head with a small smile. Yes, his was certainly a complicated story. "No, I just didn't grow up with my mother and my siblings. I'd never met them until the rebellion. I was raised in the slave dens. Been there since... probably before I could speak, though I'm told I did start talking later than most.
"I remembered her, though," He added, referring to his mother. "I used to see her when I fell asleep and not know who she was. That and the fact that I could see her so well. I could actually see what color she was, I mean."
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Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 9:02 pm
Having only one friend, it was easy to keep track of who said what. It also meant when they spoke she'd paid pretty good attention. Wakia mentioning having a brother who lived among the slaves had been in the same conversation as the questioning of tradition. As Azarax finished explaining his own little story, Lilo put her attention actually on his eyes. Beyond normal eye contact. They were a familiar color. And his mane, it too.
Her eyes moved down again to his sandy fur, putting together the rest of the story in her mind. It all made sense, he did look somewhat like Wakia and his fur would have been a reason a pureblood firekin would be living with slaves. Distracted from the conversation and his odd comment on actually seeing what color his mother was, she looked back to his eyes.
"You're Wakia's brother, aren't you?" she said, "Lived with slaves, met during the fighting.."
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Posted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 4:06 am
He smiled and nodded. "Yes, I am," He said. "I suppose he told you about me."
He paused. "Is he the friend you were talking about?" The idea that Wakia could one day, possibly, realize that Azarax was right seemed more real to him than anything else. It was a possibility. He knew this lion, however little, and now the matter was personal. It meant that the notion of some of the Traditionalists possibly joining the rebels was not simply a pipe dream. It was more, it had substance.
"When I was younger, a cub called Savitri told me I looked like another lion, who was a Firekin. She said she was Jua's slave, that was how she knew..." His voice turned suddenly wistful as he thought back, all that time ago, when he had met that little white lioness.
She had been the first one outside of Mpaji's family that he had ever really stopped to talk with, and as such she had made a much stronger impression on him than any other. That, and the fact that she had compared him to a Firekin. He hadn't known what exactly he was, but he knew he hadn't been able to tell what color his own pelt was. That alone had been enough to tell him that no, he was not a Firekin.
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