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 Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 7:36 am
Muttering slightly, Axel wandered through the forest. It had been awhile ago that he had met that mare that had gotten him riled up for now reason. He had been able to calm down and regain his sanity during that time. At this point, it was like he never even met her because he worked hard in suppressing the memories of their encounter deep within the back of his soul.
Axel had spent some time with Chitsa and some of the others that lived in that teepee. He didn't exactly live there but he was an extended guest and he was always welcomed whenever he needed a place. That was rare but he needed some place safe right now. He felt so emotionally vulnerable and he needed to recover. How could that little mare do so much damage to the psyche that he had been desperately trying to bury away?
This was bad... Axel continued to walk mindlessly through the forest. He wasn't sure why he was here or if he was looking for something, he just felt compelled to keep his hooves moving. Being stationary for any amount of time was impossible.
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 7:56 am
Wica had returned home for a while, hanging out with her parents and wondering where her brother had gotten off to. She hadn't seen him in a while, but she hoped that he was well. Her mind often trailed back toward that strange stallion she had met and obviously 'upset' even if he claimed not to be. She could tell as the air around them had felt tight and almost suffocating. Stepping past a few trees, she stopped and looked up toward the skies through the bare or nearly bare branches.
"So much happens and with no real meaning..." She muttered before shaking her head, letting her ling mane ruffle just a bit.
Walking again, she felt like she had to run, and just run until she couldn't anymore. Her own hooves picked up their paces and she was soon bouncing through the trees very quickly, too quickly as something, a stallion appeared in her path. Breaks, she had applied, but too late. slipping just about on her rump, snow washing up at the sides of her trail she came to a halt just barely in time as to not knock him over.
Opening her eyes, that had closed inspecting impact, she looked toward what she had nearly collided with. That red hair and black fabric. Axel? No, but yes, it was the same stallion she had met before. Standing quickly she stepped back away from him as to not be too close.
"Axel, what a place to nearly run into each other, huh?" Wica pipped panting just a bit as her wings shook a little to dislodge any snow within them.
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 8:04 am
Axel had heard something approaching in the distance but he kept on walking. He didn't want to see what it was and for once, he was right. He didn't want to see who was running straight towards him. The stallion didn't even flinch as she almost collided into his solid frame. Staring down at her, Axel didn't even realize it was the same mare until a few seconds later.
His emerald eyes became glassy as he glowered at Wica. What was going on? He didn't want to see this mare again. This was getting too troublesome.. He needed to get away from here, for a long time. "Goodness, can't stay away from me can you?" His eyes seemed to emit a dangerous fire and his words were dripping with sarcasm.
"But of course, what a place... What are you doing around here?" Axel tried to control his emotions as he could felt the flames of his temper lick the inside of his soul, trying to get out. Dealing with other's emotions, he was fine. Dealing with his own, he probably failed.
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 8:17 am
Ears turning back, she noted the glower that came her way. Raising her head high, prideful she stood her ground against this male, remembering what happened the last time. When his, 'bubble' was almost broken. In truth, why was she here? True she was out to find her brother, yes that had to be it, she was looking for Penny. Now just to say it, if her throat didn't choke up...
"Actually mister 'Bubble' I was out looking for my brother Penny." She stomped, not liking the look she was getting. "And it seems that you were going that direction," she pointed to her side, "I'm heading that way." She motioned past him. "But it seems that something wanted our paths to cross again, in away, you look like you've been dragged through hell before getting spat back out again."
She looked him over, minding not to look into his fired up eyes. Those eyes that could have more then likely scared her into the other direction if she hadn't met him before now. The memories of that meeting still fresh in her mind like it had only just been yesterday. Remaining quite she watched him, soon looking into his eyes with her own deep pools of liquid gold ones, though hers not showing anything but a foalish happiness.
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 9:02 am
Mister Bubble... What an odd nickname. Axel heaved a great sigh and then his eyes relaxed, looking more weary then angry now. "Unfortunately I was. And unfortunately fate is being quite cruel today." He paused before replying to her, "Yes, but that had already happened before I met you." He let it be known that he was eaten by hell and then placed on this earth to torture him. Even hell would have been better then losing his existence.
"Is that all you're doing? Then go do it." He noticed a distinct change in her personality. Was that confidence exuding from her now? She didn't seem timid like before. That was interesting... Again, she surprised him. Shaking his head angrily, Axel began to remember the time she surprised him before. Not much had changed in his head since that time but he had learned to control his emotions better. That was all. He needed to figure out why she bothered him so much but deep inside, he already knew the answer to that question.
He noticed her cheerful eyes and he wanted to spit again. That just disgusted him. He didn't want to look at that.
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 10:26 am
A brow raised as he spoke of already going through hell and being spat back out, she couldn't think why that had already happened to him, he looked like everyone else... More or less anyways, besides the fabric of course. Stepping to the side she stepped about Axel, looking him over before placing herself back where she had been, her ears flattened back for a moment before standing up again.
"If I had known where my brother was, I would, but it seems that 'you' need someone around more then my need to find my brother." She nodded, "Where are you headed anyways?" she asked with a small curious perk, though she was tempted to just leave his sorry behind where it was and leave him.
She didn't understand why she was wanting to meet up with him, fate she supposed, but it didn't seem too likely. Though this 'bubble' of his was starting to get on her nerves. Was he only feeling sorry for himself and why he was here? Or was there a deeper meaning to his turmoil that she couldn't understand? Wica could only wonder as she watched Axel, how he moved and expressed himself. It wasn't normal to her she wanted to find out 'why' he acted in such a way that it didn't tick him off into harming her...
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 11:19 am
Axel watched her with observant eyes wondering what she was thinking. He needed to stop trying to analyze everybody but he couldn't help it. That was the only way he could interpret and understand others. She was acting strange again... He needed to control his temper before it got out of control.
Staring at her with hard eyes again, Axel resented that comment. "Don't sympathize or pity me. I'm fine by myself and you should probably go look for your brother or something that doesn't involve me." He ignored her next question because he really didn't know where he was going. His hooves were just taking him anywhere they pleased and he had no say in the destination. So maybe that's why this meeting was fated to happen... He hated fate.
There was no reason for him to continue to talk to Wica. He could still feel his temper flickering about inside of him. Hopefully it wouldn't get out of hand like last time. Axel's posture was tall and straight. He looked almost graceful, beautiful, if it wasn't for his harsh eyes.
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 11:35 am
Her own eyes narrowed, making them just barely slits as she watch Axel. Well that stubborn a**, she didn't know what else she could do, but she was going to do something. Even if he were to blow up at her, she didn't really care at this moment. Deep inside she thought she could feel that he was just begging for someone to lean on, if not now then at some point.
Just like a stubborn foal. she thought turning her head to the side, her ears turning back, Always thinking that they need nothing but themselves...
She was going to put her hoof down, she cared about anything and everything that was living. Maybe she should have been an unicorn, but fate as given her the wings to soar and she was going to use them to help anyone even this stubborn soul. Despite her normal take leave or follow attitude, she wasn't going to let him walk all over her as she let others.
"And why should I not care? What I see before me is a stallion trying to shove everything that wants to care about or for him. A soul urning to just let someone close but doesn't for their own fear of being hurt." She pointed out stomping a blue socked hoof. "What scares you so much? Why do you pretend to have no feelings but anger?"
She was laying it on thick, maybe too thick, but she wanted to know. Her eyes seemed to gleam and what light there was, but it wasn't with happiness anymore. It was with sorrow and pity, maybe not for him, but for something. She wanted to help, but she hadn't the slightest clue as to how. Perhaps if she could get to know him better then just these momentary meetings she could get some where. But Wica wasn't getting anywhere with him always just pushing her away...
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 12:42 pm
Axel didn't believe he was being stubborn. It was just fact. He didn't need anybody else and it's not like anybody needed him so it all seemed to justify in his own thoughts. He was growing tired and looked like he wanted to walk away from her ... again. He was good at that stuff, running away. "Because I don't exist! That's why you shouldn't care. I'm an insignificant bystander in this world and nobody should talk to me." Axel's harsh voice drifted back to a calm state. "I don't need anybody. This world is full of cruel people. People that are there to just abandon you. I'm just being realistic. You obviously aren't."
He liked making assumptions about others because usually he was right, but with her, he was obviously wrong. That was one of the things that bothered him a lot about this mare. "I am not scared of you." Axel said defiantly as he looked the opposite direction of her. He didn't say anything else because he didn't want her to say anything else. This conversation was done, dead.
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 1:02 pm
Ears flattening straight back, she tried not to listen to what he said about her not being realistic, sure she had her moments where she wasn't. Was that so bad? Only with his head turned away from her she huffed, beating her wings a few times churning up the snows, even if she refused to lift away from the ground. The thought f him not existing puzzled her, how could she see him if he didn't exist? If something didn't exist, weren't they not even present at all?
Calming herself she stepped over and placed herself in the path he had once been walking. Her head lower and eyes focused, she wasn't moving from that spot. Ok now she was the stubborn one, her long tail twitched behind her as she stood there silently, watching. Waiting, waiting for someone to say something, even if she were more then likely to be the one to brake the silence and let loose a rage of sound.
"Does it look like I care about that? You are still a living, breathing being. Ignore it if you want, ignore me if you want. But I'm not giving up. Yes I am going to be a stubborn a**. But you are someone who shouldn't give up so easily on what life has handed you. I agree that there are those that play with the hearts of others to just break them." She paused trying to stop her own shaking. "But there are still those that are willing to give others a chance. You just have to learn to accept it"
Shaking her head, she sighed feeling that her words were lost to the winds, unheard by the ears she hoped would listen. Turning she backed out of his path, her head hanging low, but she merely stared at the grounds. Her own heart fluttering madly in her chest that it made her feel mentally and physically sick. Her own legs quivered now and again, as if on the verge of just letting her fall to the unbending ground.
Hopeless endeavor she thought closing her eyes. "Run if you like, but I'm not giving up, on you or anyone else who refuses to give someone a chance to care about you. I'm not going to follow, you life is of your own."
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 4:57 pm
Watching her carefully, Axel definitely didn't expect her to step in front of him. This was not the same mare as yesterday. He wasn't sure how to react because he just wanted to shove her out of the way. "Haven't you asked yourself this already? How could I possibly not exist but still be here somehow? There are worse things then physical or emotional appearances. My soul is gone. Don't you get that?" The stallion tried to keep his voice even and tried not to let his emotion show.
"You can't give others that chance because they just might take it and then you're nothing. You can never know who really is nice or evil... It's only a matter of time..." He didn't allow her words to touch him and he felt himself withdrawing deeper into his own bubble.
Axel too was a stubborn soquili and he didn't want to have to turn around and walk the other way. He wanted to walk this way and wasn't going to move until she moved. "You keep on thinking that. That others actually care. Selfishness is the prevailing part of another being." Axel continued to stare down at her, all traces of emotion was drained from his expression.
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 5:13 pm
"Does a soul really have anything to do with feeling something for another?" Was all she asked as she stepped past him, heading to the other side of his path. "Think to yourself Axel, has there ever been anything you ever wanted but couldn't reach because you didn't allow yourself to?"
Stopping she turned back toward him, her wings stretching a little before folding themselves again. Her eyes planted on his, not willing to take her eyes off him. Though she did keep the distance between them, then again she wouldn't fight back if he chose to just let go.
"Perhaps one day, you will think to yourself, My maybe I should let others get close. Maybe when you are hounded by a herd of Kalona who only want to eat your flesh. Not all threats are worth fighting alone. Nothing is worth fighting alone even loneliness." She shook her head. "Why should I bother, as you said, you have no soul and there for you have no heart. Isn't that right, for no heart comes the inability to seek the comfort of another when times grow hard. A soul isn't everything, just another part of making us who we are."
She paused to catch her breath for a moment. "I may not understand you, or where you might have come from before coming here. But I'm willing to know if you were willing to tell. From what I see we aren't that different. Two lone creatures trying to find their places when maybe, that is just under our noses and we are too near sighted to notice." She said no more, letting it just go, blow away like a leaf upon the wind.
In all she wished she had dropped the subject as it seemed to only dig her hole even deeper to where she could never escape and no one would ever save her...
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 7:10 pm
Axel didn't answer her questions about the soul and existence. He didn't want to answer her because then he would be letting her into his little bubble. It would be much too technical if he went into what he defined those things as. "No, I've never wanted anything actually. There's is nothing that I don't already have that I want."
He paused and stared at her silently. He didn't betray anything in his expression but thoughts were racing through his head. What was she talking about? Did that happen to her? But he didn't care... or that's what he kept telling himself. He was stubborn so maybe he could outlast his own impulses. "I don't know what you're talking about or how this turned into a conversation about yourself. But somebody with a heart like your's shouldn't be feeling that way. At least you're worthy of having a soul and a heart." Axel grew silently again, his thoughts continuing to race through his mind. This was definitely... not what he expected this conversation to turn into.
This definitely complicated things.
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 7:35 pm
She couldn’t take it, what was wrong with this stallion? Didn‘t he see that she wanted to be his friend? Clearly not, if he had, he certainly was doing a good job of hiding it. Stupid, she should have just left him to his petty, soulless life, but something kept drawing her to him and some how she felt he might feel the same… Somewhere. Shaking her head, she was growing confused and her head was starting to pound. She could hear it in her ears and it wasn‘t pleasant. Fine if he wanted to play mister tough bubble, then she would let him. Perhaps that was all he wanted, was for her to just leave him alone, then she would. For the time being…
“Fine, hide behind your fear of letting someone get close to you, hide from the world where some, yes some, would love to have a strong stallion by their side. When you come to your senses, maybe then you won‘t hide in your bubble. Like a foal hiding behind their parent‘s leg when a new friend comes along and wishes to play.”
She turned and just stood there, just letting her legs crumple beneath her, letting her down into the snow that would meet her under belly. If she had the energy and strength she would have run, fled, fled away from the confusion that was brought into her mind trying to get one stallion to understand. Understand that maybe he wasn‘t lone in the cruel worlds such as this. Pity, she thought she had gotten somewhere, but as it turned out her tries were useless, he was a tough nut to crack and she was far from strong enough to crack it… Shame.
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Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 6:32 pm
As if reading her mind, "I don't want any friends. Don't you see that? When people get close to you, you end up hurting them or they end up hurting you. Why would you want to go through pain like that? It's not worth it," Axel spoke sincerely but he was blind-sighted. He couldn't understand the joys of having relationships because he had never really been in one with anybody.
"I'd rather be a coward then have relationships." Axel stated that firmly but he wasn't sure if he completely believed the statement. Watching her walk away, Axel wasn't sure if he felt content, finally, or regret. Maybe there was a part of him that wanted her to stay and continue to yell at him but he was too stubborn to let anybody but himself know that. That was unfortunate...
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