http://www.shelleytherepublican.com/2007/12/10/str-review-super-mario-galaxy.aspx
Quote:
Nintendo must be running out of ideas because this years’s over-hyped game is a return to Lou Albano’s psychedelic drug-fueled “World of Mario”.
Nintendo have chosen this mediocre game as the subject of a multi million dollar advertising campaign. They intend to promote their red-capped plumber to a new generation of kids, but is that going to be enough to tempt kids away from Madden and some of the season’s excellent sporting titles.Super Mario Galaxy for Nintendo’s budget-price Wii console is basically a re-hashing of their 1991 “classic” Super Mario Sunshine, in fact astute readers will notice that it shares exactly the same plot!
This is hardly likely to be a problem for Nintendo because almost nobody who has played the previous generation of Mario’s antics will be young enough to consider buying this ‘re-booted’ Mario.
As with all of Mario’s games, the story is simple and largely irrelevant to the action: Mario’s girlfriend “Princess Peach” has been once-again kidnapped by “Bowser”, a satanic, spiked dragon-like demon. Rather than inform the relevant authorities, Mr Mario sets out as a sort of vigilante in order to rescue his beloved.
In order to rescue Peach the red-capped plumber has to collect satanic pentagrams, mis-translated as “power-stars” with which Mario intends to increase his own demonic power to rival Bowser’s. These pentagrams are scattered around a number of “galaxies” through which Mario must battle his way in order to retrieve. Pentagrams are rewarded for taking risks, performing stunts or acts of aggression
Mario is an excessively violent game: Mario must defeat a series of enemies by slamming into them, attacking them with a hammer, incinerating them or by jumping on their heads. I hate to think what might happen if impressionable liberal teens try to imitate Mario’s preposterous acrobatics. A game this violent should certainly come with stern disclaimers.
The bad news does not end there: Assisting Mario and his brother Wario is a cohort of drug-peddling “Lumas” - star like beings who provide Mario with magic-mushroom like power-ups which in typical RPG style enhance his fighting ability.
The most valuable commodity the Lumas sell are “star-bits” - the World of Mario equivalent of crack-cocaine. In my extensive play-testing of this game I counted over sixty overt references to drug-taking or drug culture. Do you really want your kids indoctrinated into the culture of instant gratification?Could it get any worse you ask? How about the occult? In one particularly horrific level Mario is forced to transform himself into a phantom. In this guise Mario can commune with other evil spirits, something that is expressly forbidden according to God’s law. What are Nintendo trying to tell us? That demonology is good, or that kids should study the occult as a means to grow more powerful? This is the unfortunate message that kids will take from Super Mario’s game.
Bottom line: Super Mario galaxy is a game that will most likely appeal to pre-teens and color-blind imbeciles. Younger players will not notice it’s absurd and wildly inconsistent plot. Adults (with the exception of nappy-fetishists) will find it’s childish style off-putting.
Parenting Advice: ShelleyTheRepublican recommends that families avoid this game on account of in the unlikely case that your local suppliers decide to stock it. As an alternative you should consider the excellent “Left Behind: Eternal Forces”, which is a 100% Christian game which unlike Mario teaches essential life-skills which will be of value if your child is unfortunately not raptured.
Nintendo have chosen this mediocre game as the subject of a multi million dollar advertising campaign. They intend to promote their red-capped plumber to a new generation of kids, but is that going to be enough to tempt kids away from Madden and some of the season’s excellent sporting titles.Super Mario Galaxy for Nintendo’s budget-price Wii console is basically a re-hashing of their 1991 “classic” Super Mario Sunshine, in fact astute readers will notice that it shares exactly the same plot!
This is hardly likely to be a problem for Nintendo because almost nobody who has played the previous generation of Mario’s antics will be young enough to consider buying this ‘re-booted’ Mario.
As with all of Mario’s games, the story is simple and largely irrelevant to the action: Mario’s girlfriend “Princess Peach” has been once-again kidnapped by “Bowser”, a satanic, spiked dragon-like demon. Rather than inform the relevant authorities, Mr Mario sets out as a sort of vigilante in order to rescue his beloved.
In order to rescue Peach the red-capped plumber has to collect satanic pentagrams, mis-translated as “power-stars” with which Mario intends to increase his own demonic power to rival Bowser’s. These pentagrams are scattered around a number of “galaxies” through which Mario must battle his way in order to retrieve. Pentagrams are rewarded for taking risks, performing stunts or acts of aggression
Mario is an excessively violent game: Mario must defeat a series of enemies by slamming into them, attacking them with a hammer, incinerating them or by jumping on their heads. I hate to think what might happen if impressionable liberal teens try to imitate Mario’s preposterous acrobatics. A game this violent should certainly come with stern disclaimers.
The bad news does not end there: Assisting Mario and his brother Wario is a cohort of drug-peddling “Lumas” - star like beings who provide Mario with magic-mushroom like power-ups which in typical RPG style enhance his fighting ability.
The most valuable commodity the Lumas sell are “star-bits” - the World of Mario equivalent of crack-cocaine. In my extensive play-testing of this game I counted over sixty overt references to drug-taking or drug culture. Do you really want your kids indoctrinated into the culture of instant gratification?Could it get any worse you ask? How about the occult? In one particularly horrific level Mario is forced to transform himself into a phantom. In this guise Mario can commune with other evil spirits, something that is expressly forbidden according to God’s law. What are Nintendo trying to tell us? That demonology is good, or that kids should study the occult as a means to grow more powerful? This is the unfortunate message that kids will take from Super Mario’s game.
Bottom line: Super Mario galaxy is a game that will most likely appeal to pre-teens and color-blind imbeciles. Younger players will not notice it’s absurd and wildly inconsistent plot. Adults (with the exception of nappy-fetishists) will find it’s childish style off-putting.
Parenting Advice: ShelleyTheRepublican recommends that families avoid this game on account of in the unlikely case that your local suppliers decide to stock it. As an alternative you should consider the excellent “Left Behind: Eternal Forces”, which is a 100% Christian game which unlike Mario teaches essential life-skills which will be of value if your child is unfortunately not raptured.
so mario is a crack dealing occultist who collects pentagrams to kill a ' satanic spiked dragon-like demon' now xD
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