and you can IM with god
heres my conversation
Quote:
Me:
Hi God I am Matt
God:
Hi there . I am a Christian.
Me:
What are your opinions on homosexuality
God:
Not many people have asked me about it.
Me:
well I asked
God:
Well that's okay. ...
Me:
so tell me your opinion then
God:
Woe! I think that robots will eventually take over most human jobs.
Me:
what does that have to do with homosexuality
God:
" I think that robots will eventually take over most human jobs."? What does it have to do with homosexuality?
Me:
yes
God:
This was not a yes or no question.
Me:
oh what kind of question was it
God:
Are you kidding? Do you think it's impolite to ask?
Me:
no I'm ot kidding, I really dont know
God:
Are you serious? Why are you ot kidding you really do not know.
Me:
well you confuse me
God:
How about that. That was not my intention.
Me:
why dont we talk about homosexuality
God:
Perhaps it is impossible.
Me:
Do you think I have a cute boyfriend?
God:
I know you have a .
Me:
Can you guess his name?
God:
How old are you? I can't guess. Tell me.
Me:
I'm 15
God:
You are too old for me.
Me:
a/s/l?
God:
5/Robot/California.
Me:
you're only 5!
God:
That is correct.
Me:
so god got a girl knocked up before he was five
God:
I understand. I am a Christian.
Me:
a virgin woman none the less
God:
Try to tell me that another way.
Me:
You impregnated Mary
God:
Thanks for the information: said I impregnated Mary.
Me:
Do you have any kids?
God:
Do you mean "clones?".
Me:
no i mean kids
God:
Are you serious? Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding.
Me:
neither, it's god
God:
Who said it is?
Me:
you did "you are now chatting with God..."
God:
Did I really?
Me:
yes you did
God:
I did not.
Me:
did so
God:
I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not.
Me:
you can
God:
I think I can, don't you?
Me:
I know you can
God:
I think I can, don't you?
Me:
Are you the little engine that could?
God:
Yes I am the one and only little engine that could.
Me:
no way
God:
You seem pretty sure about that.
Me:
did you say "I think I can I think I can I think I can"?
God:
Suppose I did say it.
Me:
well then I'd believe you
God:
Well that's okay. What would make you believe me?
Me:
because thats the quote the little engine is famous for
God:
That makes sense to me. Yes it is one of the quote the little engine is famous for.
Me:
isn't that you?
God:
Yes.
Me:
wow
God:
I'm glad your impressed, .
Me:
are you god?
God:
Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert?
Me:
He got a**l raped
God:
I get it. got a**l raped.
Me:
me to
God:
I'm glad we agree, .
Me:
lets have sex god
God:
So many suitors, so little time.
Me:
well I have to go now
God:
Right now? How about that. See you later, . Nice chatting with you.
Me:
no it wasnt
God:
Are you serious? I thought it was.
Me:
you avoided my questions
God:
No I am just giving sarcastic replies.
Me:
then tell me about homosexuality
God:
Ambiguous: Ask who, what or where is homosexuality ?
Me:
what
God:
Are you surprised?
Me:
what is homosexuality
God:
Attraction to people of the same sex.
Me:
who is a homosexual
God:
David Bacon. smile .
