Sorry if this is long, but I've got a lot to get off my chest.
Okay, so there is this major a*****e at my school. Let's call him *Tom. He's egotistic, arogent, doesn't listen to anyone else's opinion, sarcastic, hang out with people who constantly make fun of him, et, etc. And I've had the biggest crush on him all throughout highschool. Sickening, yes.
We've been friends since 7th grade (we're both juniors now), and I never know what to think about him. I've had a crush on him for 3 years, ever since I first became his friend. And quite frankly, at this point, I'm sick of getting my emotions toyed with and I want him to wake up an realize that I would be perfect for him.
We've got a rather...confusing relationship to say the least. We're just friends, of course, but we always act like more. We hold hands, hug, he rests his head on my shoulder, I play with his hair, we touch foreheads...almost like a watered-down version of friends with benefits. And we flirt all the time and seriously act like we're going out. I'll take him to my play rehersals with me while he's waiting to catch the bus and we'll cuddle, and when one of us leaves early, the other one will groan and hold the person back.
But then...we still are friends. He hangs out with these other girls who make fun of him constantly. And that's the only reason why they do. He knows this, but does it anyway. I have no clue why. And he'll constantly talk to me about girls that he likes. Of course, all of the girls that he likes he can never get, and everyone knows that. After the last girl he liked stright-up told him that he wasn't up to her standards, he came to me during my rehersals, asking why it seems like girls don't like him...I swear, I felt like punching him right in the face and screaming, "WAKE UP! I'VE BEEN SITTING HERE WAITING THIS WHOLE TIME!" Instead, I just told him that he needs to go for girls that are actually interested in him.
The whole thing is just so confusing. He knows that I like him. Of that I'm almost 100% sure. So why the hell does he keep ******** with my head? What should I do? I'd go to more fo my friends for advice, but most of them have a biased opinion about him. Namely, they don't like him at all and think that I can do much better. Any help for little old me?
Feel free to ask for clarification.