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 Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2007 9:52 pm
Who: AearHwesta & Valefor
What: a chat between close friends, nothing more
Where: the Hiril Anorfalf out at sea
When: midday, 12 September 2007
Why: Valefor needs someone to talk to & knows it. (Aear does too... if he would deign admit anything.)
The sky was a crisp, bright blue dotted with a small scattering of clouds that only intensified its beauty. Like a string of pearls on a lovely lady's neck. A well loved, well kept ship glided along through the waters, her hull slicing through the expanse of blue below as her mast attempted to do the same to the breathtaking brilliance of the blue above. Her captain seemed to be of the colors of the sky, his snow-spotted blue 'bangs' tugging around his face in the steady breeze. The kitsu padded the deck, letting the wind steer his ship for the moment. These waters were deep, with no dangers. For one brief moment the nautical angelic closed his russet eyes and faced into the breeze, willing the movement to clear his head, calm his heart.
It was maddening.
Sighing, AearHwesta wondered again how Valefor & Seer fared. It seemed even his ship was lonely without them.
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Posted: Wed Sep 12, 2007 5:49 pm
Valefor glided out into the vast blue and blue, heading for the deep water. Somehow... she just knew he'd be out there. The rings of her lamp jingled with every occasional wingbeat to maintain altitude, her scale-feather fur flattened along her sleek form in the wind of her passage. Her thick feather ponytail trailed behind her, flairing out briefly like some sort of flag when she turned to seek a better wind to aid her passage. Was she really in such a hurry? She wasn't sure. But she'd found out... at the very least heavily suspected... weighed on her heart uneasily. And Aear was the only person she felt comfortable with talking about such things to... even if that situation in and of itself was akward in an entirely different fashion.
The Hiril's gleaming hull was unmistakable to her keen hawk's eyes, she had grown so familiar with it over the course of her time on this world. Aear's comforting form was also easy to spot, and she felt something near her stomach start to unknot. Although he looked... agitated might not be a good word, but he looked as though he was bothered by something. Not that she would ever press if he didn't wish to speak of it, but the idea of helping him with a problem as well as getting some advice of her own was appealing to her. Ever since her ultimatum, badly enforced as it had been, she felt as though she was lacking in her duties to him as a friend...
When she was finally withing hearing range she called out, a hint of the belling call of her Aeon form drifting with it. "Aear! Permission to come aboard, Captain?" She didn't exactly have to ask permission... perhaps she was hoping he'd pick up that this was more than an idle social call because of it.
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Posted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 12:28 pm
White flecked blue ears perked at the familiar voice and his blue tails started to wag. Russet eyes opened and the sailor turned his face to Valefor. He was no fool... this was not a playful visit. As it was... encounters between them of his usual preferred nature really should be limited or eliminated between them. They had become too close, AearHwesta knew. Too close... and it was unfair when Aear knew the aeon longed for kits and a family.
He did too. Too bad...
Well that was neither here nor there, nor would it help the current ache in his heart. No matter. Valefor must need his company as much as he needed hers. And something serious, or she would have simply landed. "Fer ye? Permission granted, Lass!"
Yes: Lass not Luv. There was a flash of aching pain that her hawk-like eyes might be able to discern from her vantage point before it was gone. Aye... if he was to let her go, to find a mate to bear children with the sailor knew he would have to cut such ties. Best to attempt with how he thought of her.
And there was Seer to think about...
The blue & white angelic shook his body from nose to tails as if he was shaking water from his fur & wings. No. He really should not think such thoughts. Or have such feelings. Hence avoiding both his home & the Place. Too many empaths & telepaths. Infernal creatures, when one had something better kept inside.
Ah, but it would be nice to have a break in the loneliness...
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Posted: Sun Sep 16, 2007 7:07 pm
Valefor angled her wings to coast over the deck and dropped gracefully to touch her paws on the familiar wood. That he had called her Lass and the ache he quickly buried had certainly not gone unnoticed, and there was a flash of fellow feeling on her features that thankfully was covered by her mask. Though she had a feeling that Aear did not need to see her facial expressions to read her after all this time.
She gave him a friendly headbutt on the shoulder in greeting rather than her usual nuzzle, attempting to help him - both of them really - with the difficult parting they finally had realized needed to be made. Truly realized; knowing was one thing, understanding was another. At least in matters like these.
"Beautiful day to be out here..." Her voice quickly trailed off as she simply stared out over the expanse of ocean for a moment. It was... centering. She felt less at odd ends out here. And her love of the ocean was a part of her even before she met Aear; if Crow truly felt as she suspected, she hoped he would understand that... and that his dreams of his past life wouldn't keep him from enjoying the sea in his own right.
As it was she wasn't sure how to broach the subject. She was certain she had mentioned her other dear friend to Aear at one time or another, but her mind was almost always on other things when she was with the blue sailor for one reason or another, so she doubted sincerely that she'd told him very much. And Crow said he knew of Aear, and that one of his house-mates had been one of Aear's fleeting companions. But that didn't mean either of them had actually met the other. "Aear... I feel silly for asking this, really, but I have ever really told you about my other good friend, Crow? I ran into him the other morning and we had a rather interesting conversation..." That was as much as she felt comfortable saying until she had some sort of confimation about Aear's knowledge of Crow or lack there-of.
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Posted: Sun Sep 16, 2007 9:32 pm
Yes.. he could not see behind her mask but there were other tales: a subtleness of her scent, the way her body moved. This was different than any other time he had needed to break ties with one of his 'loves'...
At Valefor's headbutt he turned and returned the gesture by casually bumping the underside of her chin with the top of his muzzle & head. Aear followed her glance out, knowing the ship was still safe in these waters unless the weather changed. "Aye. Aye that it is."
The sailor let the silence span between them. It was not quite comfortable... and yet at the same time it was. He sighed softly. Would the mate the aeon found to have kits with permit them still such times together? Many would not, and the thought saddened AearHwesta. Still he hoped he knew Valefor well enough to trust that she would not chose such a mate.
Blink. "Crow? hmmm... ye might have mentioned him. I know I've heard the name before." This kitsu must be male... Aear would remember more if he had been told about a female. The nature of the beast, one could say. remembering female's just came easier to him, even those he had not met. "It's nice yer seeing other friends. A good talk then, I hope?"
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Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 12:54 pm
Comfortably uncomfortable. An odd feeling, but it was likely to be a common one between them from now on. "Hmm. I think it was good, for the most part. It left me a bit confused, though..." She glanced sidewise at him, not wanting to lose sight completely of the sunlight flickering on the water. "I'm of the impression he's not precisely fond of you. He said one of the kitsu he lives with was one you've had a dallyance with in the past... seemed none to happy after he convinced me to tell him what had been bothering me and I told him about our situation..."
That was the real problem, wasn't it? Whoever she decided to pursue a relationship with after this point was going to have to realize that she wasn't going to stop being friends with Aear, and that she knew full well what she was "getting into" when she'd started this. Their feelings had simply not agreed to keep things simple like they were intended... And they would also have to trust her not to turn around and have intimate relations with him again. She wouldn't do something like that. "I would hope perhaps that he might change his opinion of you if he actually got to know you. But such things are hard to determine."
She walked over to the rail and propped her forelegs over it, looking at the water for another long moment. "He... didn't say anything, not directly, but the way he said some things, and the way he was acting..." She sighed. "I feel... stupid, in a way, not to have seen he had feelings for me before this..." She shook her head and rested it on the rail between her paws, a frustrated huff echoing slightly behind her mask's painted face. "Nor do I have any idea how I feel about that."
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Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 1:47 pm
Confused? Concern gave way to an indifferent shrug that this kitsu she spoke of might not be fond of him. Although it did bother him... slightly. In the realization that such sentiments would likely be difficult for Valefor. That was something AearHwesta did not want for the beautiful and kind aeon. "Aye... that's likely." True, the sailor had more than his share of dalliances some were sure to live with other kitsu. Which one, Aear did not know. Speaking of whom the ladies might live with was not usually something that came up.
He turned from the sea to watch instead the female. Odd, to watch her with almost abject distance. AearHwesta sighed. This was very difficult. Part of him wanted nothing more than to bury his head into the soft red fur of her neck... part of him dreamed foolishly for Seer... and the rest stubbornly held him back from both. Bother such feelings.
Aear listened, an ear cocked, to what the aeon had to say. So... this Crow, this friend of hers... he was interested in Valefor beyond simple friendship? AearHwesta could hardly blame the unknown male. Sighing, he padded to Valefor's side, joining her to hang on the railing. The wake of the Hiril Anorfalf against her side seemed to capture his attention. He was quiet for some time, just watching the white crests of water.
"Well... I can't tell ye what ye feel about it. I'll help ye as I'm able, Lu-... Lass." A gentle sorrow touched his russet eyes, echoed in the slouch of his body & how his tails slowed to a sad stillness behind him. "I'll not fight the lad... that ye can be sure of. An' I'll do what I'm able to befriend him if ye'd like..."
Russet eyes turned to the aeon, searching her masked face as if hoping to see something behind the mask or to make eye contact while at the same time almost afraid to look into her eyes. He did not want his resolve to fail. And Aear feared she would see the love & longing he had for their 'daughter' within them. "What would ye like te talk out with me, Valefor? Te help ye with how yer feeling for him or just about the situation in general? Ye know I'd do anything fer ye. Anything I could,"
Pain. The one thing he could not do for her... kits... Not that he would not have had he been able. It simply could not be done. He had to accept that. And if she wanted... if this Crow really was willing... Aear would stand behind her decision 120%. As long as it made Valefor happy.
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Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 2:07 pm
Valefor chuckled softly, feeling slightly bemused. "Ah... I'm not sure what I needed when I came out here. Perhaps someone to help me puzzle things out? It's odd for me, really, being in a situation like this. I was detached from things for so long in my Before... I'm good at looking at someone else's problem and helping them to see it from other angles, but I get in one of my own? I feel like I'm trying to row a longboat with one oar."
She was quiet for a moment. "My friendship with Crow... is probably rather like what ours would have been if we hadn't gotten so... close..." She shook her head. "So it's likely I could develope feelings for him. But what if I did?" She sighed. "I don't want to go diving into something too soon... you know? And I do worry about his reactions to you. I'm not going to stop being friends with you and going out sailing with you and Seer. I refuse to do that. For anyone. For good or ill... we're family, really, no matter what our relationship."
She sat back and flared her wings out to stretch them before resettling them. "But... what of you, Aear? I'll not pry if it's something you'd rather keep to yourself, but you looked troubled." Oh... if only she knew how much trouble the simple question of a concerned friend could stir up.
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Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 3:00 pm
"I'm right glad te hear that, Lass." Aear managed to get in with a soft laugh as she flared her wings, himself drawing back from the rail with a grin. Family. Aye. "Ye and Seer-lass mean the world te me."
Oh the ironies of truth.
He froze, stunned, as she continued before he could comment on the rest of what Valefor had said. Aear's face seemed to pale, as if the blood drained from his face. Not that it would be much visible beneath his fur. The rapid nervous darting of his eyes however, suddenly more than unwilling to catch hers, spoke plenty of how troubled he was about it. Perhaps more so that Valefor -of anyone- had asked about it. "Somethin' that shouldn't be... much less tol' anyone. Somethin' I mustn't...
Whatever would have slipped out with the rest of his unintended words never was voiced as the sailor shook his head then the rest of himself vigorously. His smile though honest seemed more than a little forced when it came. "ah-em. Aye. Anyway. Ah-hem. Right. Yer th' only one that can say how soon is too soon, Lass. But I can see to his reactions, if ye wish. I've nothin' agin' him."
Honest. Truthful. He could search out this 'Crow', perhaps discover if the feelings Valefor suspected him of were there. But the sailor seemed edgy, skittish. His reaction to her question still there.
Closing his eyes AearHwesta sighed. "I came across Seer... with a friend... a lad..." It was like a confession perhaps a start. He certainly did not sound proud of it, the guilt in his voice almost viscous in its constancy.
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Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 3:15 pm
Concern flickered into her eyes, genuine concern at his reaction to her question rather than the more general concern that he seemed troubled by something. Oh Aear... that something bothered him so much was like a stab in the heart. Surely she had seen him troubled before, but never like this. Though with how quickly he changed the subject again she wasn't sure whether to press or not, considering she'd said previously she wouldn't if he didn't want to tell...
"Well, if you feel you want to seek him out... I usually find him not far from Realm HQ. His fur and feathers are basically all black, though his head fur is just very dark brown, and his face is patterened white and black like a... mask." There was just a bit of mirth in that last part, as if she only just now realized the coincidence in that, considering what Crow's feelings were for her and what she might end up trying to return.
She could almost feel the dam of emotion trying to break when AearHwesta sighed, and she nudged his shoulder gently with the beak of her mask. "Seer? Did something happen?..." She hadn't quite put two and three together yet... she was still getting six. But she had this bizarre feeling in her gut that whatever this was... was going to be very difficult for both of them and perhaps for Seer as well. But she also felt that Aear was the one that was going to be torn apart by it the most.
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Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 3:42 pm
AearHwesta nodded off-handedly, some part of him filing away the description & location for a later day & time. His thoughts and heart were otherwise distracted. He trusted Valefor... if she said she could grow to have feelings for this Crow he could not be a completely bad sort. Although she had grown so close to himself... a kitsu Aear was not entirely & in fact very little proud of at the moment.
Which in itself was a blow. The sailor had never disliked himself before.
He gave another heavy sigh. "The lad was... coming on to her, Valefor-luv. Too close by far... too much like me... I might'a been to hard on him... But Seer can do better!!!"
In his emotional turmoil Aear had reverted to his usual way of addressing the aeon. Not that he seemed to notice. What happened that day spilled out from him best as he could recall, of course from the sailor's perspective, of course saying nothing but paternal feelings for Seer. At least in his words. Anything else that came across would have to be read in. His russet eyes flashed open, pained, worried, pleading to be told he had done the right thing. "I didn't mean te chase him off... the lass needs her friends..."
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Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 4:11 pm
Valefor let out a slow breath. "Ah." Of course Aear wouldn't want Seer to get caught up in some flirtatious young male's compliments. Especially not when she was so... well, once she was made aware of things she usually figured out how to deal with them, but the silly girl could be rather dense about some things.
"So that's what she's been troubling over lately. I was wondering what happened... she said she didn't want to tell me until she had time to think about it. You know how she can be sometimes, worrying puzzles to death." It was a stubborn streak that had served Seer well when it came to learning how to help out on the Hiril, and it meant she'd never just lay down in the face of problems later in life. "I wasn't there, Aear, so I can't say if you were truly too hard on him or not... but I, and I think that Seer, would rather it have been that way than for her to get caught up in something. If she made a choice like that knowingly... I might not like it, but I could at least respect that she made the decision. But she's so... oblivious about those things yet."
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Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 4:33 pm
He sighed, looking as if a weight was off his shoulders though he was still clearly troubled. Russet eyes looked away. He wanted the best for Seer. Wanted the best for Valefor. Which was not him. For either of them.
He smiled while looking relieved and dejected at once. "Aye... the lass is so innocent still. There'll be more lads, likely than not. Don't know how I'll deal with them. I really don't Valefor. I can trust her with me ship... but I cannot trust..." Another sigh, this one heavy with the weight of his own feelings as well as his worry for his 'daughter'. If only he could shut those feelings off! Seer was the type should he come on to her his usual way he would not take advantage of for she would not understand where he was coming from. Innocents he would romance, yes. But never if they could not grasp that he would never be 'theirs' alone.
Only... Aear shook his head again, opening his eyes and smiling weakly at the aeon. "I never thought it would be so hard, Lass." So much double meaning in that simple phrase.
"I can not worry about ye... as much anyway. Ye've the wisdom of many years if nay the personal experience and I know in th' end ye'll be well, whether it's with this Crow friend of yers or someone ye've yet te meet. Seer though..."
Aear shook his head. Too close. He could not tell her. No. Not even Valefor whom he loved, would always love, more than the ladies' kitsu had ever thought possible. Nay... especially not Valefor. He would not lie to her should he be confronted on it, but AearHwesta would not tell the aeon how the other to capture his heart had captured it in a whole new way.
And he had to be sure he was not rebounding as well. Rebounding from the same impossible relationship Valefor was afraid of rebounding from. Even should anyone learn of his improper feelings for the lass he had helped raise as a daughter, AearHwesta would do nothing but avoid until he was certain the desires for family he had once considered with Valefor had not simply slid over to the only other kitsu he felt as strongly for.
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Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 4:53 pm
Valefor poked playfully at Aear with her "beak" a few times, chuckling softly. "Things like these are never easy. Makes life more interesting." She understood. Or at least she thought she did. She could tell there was more that Aear wasn't saying, but she hadn't yet caught on to what precisely he wasn't willing to admit. But insofar as not wanting Seer to wind up being used and hurt... what was happening to her was bad enough, and she'd known how Aear was. Seer wouldn't even have considered something like that unless confronted with it, and even then she'd give a person the benefit of the doubt until she was proved wrong. She always saw the best in people... "We'll just have to watch out for her until she knows what to watch for herself, that's all. She's got a good head on her shoulders, she does make mistakes but she rarely makes really bad decisions."
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Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 5:35 pm
Playfully Aear yipped & 'dodged' at the aeon's pokes. He grinned, having woefully missed such things. Such simple, wonderful joys.
Gently he nuzzled Valefor as she finished speaking, perhaps surprisingly missing the ladies' kitsu's more accustomed loverly touch and affections. He was clearly still upset about something, but it was equally clear most likely to Valefor more than any other kitsu that what he was not sharing was also something he himself did not want to face or even to feel. "Aye, lass. Aye. Perhaps..." A sigh. "Perhaps she should learn how I really am... not this family kitsu is likely she perceives me to be?" A crack broke his words, straining them and Aear nuzzled the aeon like a kit might, seeking solace. "I don't want her e'er to know, Lass. Be that wrong?"
He did not want Seer to think less of him and yet... at the same time once she already knew then perhaps...
Nay. He still would never be worthy of her. He had not deserved Valefor either... "Least if'n she knows... she'll know what to avoid..." But he did not sound very sure.
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