Welcome to Gaia! ::

It is a fine line as to what is stalking and what is not, and I'm glad you saw fit to post your opinion, Cass.

However, I'd like to remind you that some of us may privy to things we aren't sharing because we've been asked not to. I'm pretty sure there's more than one of us that's doing so, too. And I guess we'll all continue to hold whatever cards we do have, out of some sort of honor, misguided or not.

I think it's a mark of the fact that we all care about him very much, that we're trying to do anything. And to be blunt, none of us is aiming to hurt him or anyone else. You, however, seem to be quite good at it, since you casually sling darts at anyone you see fit...regardless of their good intent, and regardless of the situation. It is one thing to play the devil's advocate, or to be practical...and it is another thing entirely to do what you're doing when everyone is obviously concerned about Pilbo.

I think we're all pretty well aware of the likelihood of the consequences of our search...and we know that pain of discussion with him or his family may well be unavoidable if we continue. If you don't think we have been thinking before we acted, it only shows you have a really bad opinion of some of us, or that you're in some way think you're morally or ethically superior than us. We can't control how you feel or what you think...or that you seem to have the need to make light of us when we do feel, because that's unseemly.

Underscoring that we might not be able to do anything is an ugly thing to do, by the way. Because we should damn well be allowed to have hope, at the very least.

I'm not going to bother to amend this with a no offense, because frankly, we all know that means that we sure as hell know we're being offensive. I'm done with being treated like an idiot.

I agree wholeheartedly and cannot believe that some people can be so heartless!

I understand what you are saying but he is a friend and I worry about my friends.

regardless of whether he shows up or not we still have a right to be concerned. especially in light of the dribs and drabs of info we have the seem to amount to something that might not be good. it's human nature to worry. and while worrying in and of itself does no good we still do it. not everyone gets attached to the people they speak with online but i do, and so does jiggy, and others. the intention was not to spark an argument but that is what may happen when an inflammatory "who cares, life goes on" post is made. and to post that and not assume that you may piss people off is just ignorant, although IMO it was done with the fullest intent.

Koala, I am not arguing. I'm just tired of being made to feel like I'm a thoughtless idiot who can't be counted on to be rational. I felt it necessary to say what I did because I feel there's a rather long standing problem that's not even tied to the discussion of Pilbo's absence.

I think the crux of the issue is this: if you're going to use fighting words, you better be ready to hear the responses. If you don't want to rile up other posters, you should know when to hold your tongue. Especially if you're a mod, like Cass is.

It's one thing to be yourself, and another to be callous for the sake of being callous. Or to shield your heart from others because you don't want them to see the real you because maybe, you don't want to be hurt.

I'm done talking about it now. I just wanted to say my piece. I'll stand down now because I'm sick at heart...and I think that this is getting to me more than it should.

I apologize for making you uncomfortable, KC. Sincerely. I wish I could just not care...but it's not in my nature.

***Hugs***

well, im going to get some food right now, and when I get back someone else will probably be using this comp. We'll see.
As with many things in life, whatever will be will be. We can just sit back and try to enjoy the ride.
And I'll try to be on again later.

runs in the family, that does stare