[FIN] A Contrb to the Crit of Pol Econ [Fell/Fade/Weep/Rise]

[Jun D]

A Contribution to the Critique of Political Economy
...with apologies to Karl Marx.

[ Sky Fell In / Summer Fades / Saddened Eyes / The Sun Also Rises ]

It felt clear as yesterday in his mind, that time so many moons ago Fell was stuck in Rise's early rudimentary salamander traps. There had not been another like it since then - no, their salamander traps were much better constructed now, sturdy structures that allowed for multiple captures in one night; that had proved to be useful for more than salamanders, allowing their burgeoning 'wholesale exotic foods retail business' (as Rise was so fond of calling it) to expand into other preservable critters. Ah, yes, preservable - another aspect of their work that he could allow himself some measure of pride over. Rise's penchant for drifting towards the salt marshes had been puzzling at first, but once Fell had figured out a way to use the mineral deposits to their advantage, their regular haunt became an important part of their endeavour, allowing for stock to keep for ages without losing edibility - and there was something about the piquant taste of salted meat that kept them coming back for more. Good times, in other words - such good times they have had, slowly cultivating their little experiments into a legitimate vocation, each pang of failure sweetened by the pleasure of success. The only mark on their honeymoon enterprise - so to speak - was Rise's bizarre obsession with adding alligator meat to their inventory. Alligator meat. It was the one aspect of his boss' desires he could never understand. Kimeti do not eat alligators. Alligators eat kimeti. Kimeti stay away from alligators to prevent themselves from getting eaten. Which part of this equation was so difficult for Rise to comprehend? But what Rise wanted, Fell would try his best to fulfil - which brought us back to where he was now. Alligators are significantly larger than salamanders. Alligator traps are certainly large enough to catch a buck. Thus was Fell stuck upside down in the very trap he was trying to construct, held fast as he was so long ago amidst a tangle of branches and vines.

Oh, the ignominy.  

[Maxx D]

Fade had wandered off the mainlands with Weep in tow, alternating between stepping in muddy and clear waters just for the heck of it. "The populace," she announced, "is currently in equilibrium and far too boring to hang around." She had a feeling her sister either sighed or rolled her eyes behind her back, but she was doing that all the time so she didn't quite care anymore.

A little splashing, that sounded a bit like small prey thrashing about in the jaws of a predator, drew her interest. Her ears perked up as she raced towards the noise, rather than common-sensically away -

- and so it was lucky for her that it was just a buck stuck upside down in a partially constructed trap.

"Hey!" she said, chipperly. "What happened?"  

[Jun D]

As her sister picked up speed, Weep picked up a sturdy branch in her jaws instead. Not that it would deter a crocodile much, but at least having something to toss at one might buy them some time to run like the blazes - a strategy they'd had to employ a few times in the past, for Fade never would learn her lesson, or anyone's lesson, to be fair.

It was not a crocodile. After a moment's thought, she daintily spit the branch out, and in a clipped little voice, soft from chronic disuse, said, "Don't touch it. It might have rabies."  

[Jun D]

"I do not have rabies!" he snapped peevishly, "and I am not an it. I'm sorry, ladies, but if you're not going to be helpful please just leave me alone." He was being rude, he knew - but it was hard to maintain a cheerful attitude when you've been hoist upside down with your own petard, under two pairs of prying eyes too blasé for his taste.  

[Jun D]

Weep shrugged, unmoved. The buck may not have rabies, but he sounded whiny and that was even worse. Still, she trotted over and begin nipping at the knots around his ankles - the sooner they got this done with, the sooner they could get on with their lives.  

[Maxx D]

"You could be a little less impolite," Fade said, kicking the branches of the trap into submission and potentially endangering the buck's brains. "I like the thought of leaving you alone in the wood for ages and ages more than you've already been here because you think you don't have rabies. But here we are," kicking and kicking, very worrisomely, "being quite nice and freeing you from this contraption. and you still haven't told us what happened. It all looks very convoluted."  

[Jun D]

Fell suddenly went very still. This particular doe was not just annoying, she might well also be psychotic. Certainly she currently seemed intent on dashing his brains out in the most casual way possible (manslaughter defence, perhaps?), and for a helpless kimeti suspended in midair, this was a very worrying predicament. Perhaps it was best to give her what she wanted:
"I was trying to construct an alligator trap."  

[Maxx D]

"Why would you want to trap an alligator?" She exclaimed in surprise, with a particularly enthusiastic stomp. "It seems to me if you're not rabid you're crazy!" Her note on the last word went up, as if half incredulous and half excited. It was quite eerie.  

[Jun D]

"You're telling me!" he yelped, swaying back through sheer force of will as her sharp stomp threatened to accomplish what he thought must be her murderous intent, "it's not my idea - it's my boss'! He's obsessed with trying to get alligator meat! I think he's crazy too, but, hey, I work for him, so I don't have a choice!"  

[Maxx D]

In his little speech, certain key words set off little switches in her head - and possibly her face, which contorted from bewilderment, to consideration, to excitement again, and then perhaps a look of pure glee, purposeful glee, that could possibly be quite insane.

"He's crazy!" She declared, ripping away the rest of the trap. "Your boss! He's mad!

And of course, of course you have a choice!" a little half-turn to clear the debris, almost dancing in the chaotic remnants. "Why, don't you have a union? A contract? Terms and conditions to make sure he doesn't endanger your life? Why I never!

TAKE ME." She whispered, pulling his face close with the last vine twined around his neck. "Take me to your leader."  

[Jun D]

"Iiiyai!" he yelped, yanked forward before he'd even had the chance to really hit the ground with the customary thud, "he may be crazy, lady, but you're definitely crazier! I don't know half the things you're talking about, and I don't intend to find out!"

With a panicked yank, he broke free from her clutches and skittered backwards in alarm, "Thanks for the help and all - but I'd appreciate it if I never see you again."

A kick of his heels and he was off like a shot, fuelled by the power of sheer terror.  

[Maxx D]

"Oooooh," she exclaimed, setting off after his tracks and screaming at her sister at the same time, "can you imagine that? He wants to continue being exploited, imagine that level of brainwashing!"

Her little energetic hooves carelessly trampled what was probably the homes of millions of ground insects in pursuit. "I mean, can you imagine being made to do something you never wanted to? That you were forced to? And such dangerous things too!

"Honestly, Weep!" She managed to shake her head while running straight forward, "that's so stupid!"  

[Jun D]

Yes, indeed, Weep thought grimly as she reluctantly motivated her limbs into action after her sister, what kind of idiot would willingly commit dangerous acts at the behest of another on a regular basis. What kind.

They should never have freed the buck. They should have just left him there for the alligator.  

[Jun D]

HOLY SWAMPMOTHER, THE CRAZY DOE WAS FOLLOWING HIM!!! "Think, Fell, think," he whimpered to himself, frantically weaving through foliage, "where can I go that will throw her off the scent? Where can I lead her..."

...Thoughts of the nearest crocodile pit briefly crossed his mind. Briefly.

That brief thought, however, served to unlock a wealth of hitherto suppressed memories of his last visit there, where Rise had ordered him to gather information on croc habits. His knees practically buckled mid-stride - dear motherfather, he had barely made it out with his hide intact. In many ways...it was now dawning on him...this was all his boss' fault. So what if the crazy doe was following him? She would be Rise's problem once she was there. Hah! That'll serve him! Who knows, she might even manage to bully him out of sending him back to another alligator trap. Either way, he would be free of one mess or another for the next few hours. Very well, then!

With a strange gleam in his eye, he cut his path and headed for home.  

[Maxx D]

*****

"Hello," Rise said, amused by Fell's skitter in. "You're back earlier than expected. How did - oh, you've got leaves all over you," he started to pick the remaining debris off, thoughtfully tasting some. "Guess it could've gone better then, I -"