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 Posted: Sat Jun 18, 2011 11:53 pm
How do you know when you've met the right person? I want August to come, but at the same time... what if I'm wrong?
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 12:04 am
I'm afraid to get out of my house and be social. I don't have very many friends outside of the internet. My mother is starting to worry about me a bit. It's not that I wouldn't like to have more friends, it's just that I'm not a very social person. I have trouble starting conversations.
@LMF: I completely agree with Shiori on this.
He is not perfect whatsoever if he breaks your heart, then wants to be friends with benefits when you care for him so much. You should not let him do that to you. You're better than that. You should not depend on him at all. You may be in love with him, but if he truly cared about you he would not do this friends with benefits bullshit to you. :/
You shouldn't let him in the first place.
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 12:07 am
Miss Amelia Pond How do you know when you've met the right person? I want August to come, but at the same time... what if I'm wrong? You will know.
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 12:22 am
CH0Z0 Miss Amelia Pond How do you know when you've met the right person? I want August to come, but at the same time... what if I'm wrong? You will know.
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 12:25 am
Miss Amelia Pond CH0Z0 Miss Amelia Pond How do you know when you've met the right person? I want August to come, but at the same time... what if I'm wrong? You will know. You'll know. I didn't know mine was coming, it just did. All of a sudden, I knew. All I did was crack a joke at someone visiting my computer lab, as usual. But then my computer lab became a chemistry lab.
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 12:31 am
Icemist Dawn I'm afraid to get out of my house and be social. I don't have very many friends outside of the internet. My mother is starting to worry about me a bit. It's not that I wouldn't like to have more friends, it's just that I'm not a very social person. I have trouble starting conversations.
@LMF: I completely agree with Shiori on this.
He is not perfect whatsoever if he breaks your heart, then wants to be friends with benefits when you care for him so much. You should not let him do that to you. You're better than that. You should not depend on him at all. You may be in love with him, but if he truly cared about you he would not do this friends with benefits bullshit to you. :/
You shouldn't let him in the first place.
@ LMF: Agree with the others too, though I'm probably not the best person for advice based on experience. But really: the hard thing is often the best thing to do, as much as it sucks. And honestly, I feel that a relationship shouldn't be based solely on the "benefits" part. They're right, and you deserve a hell of a lot better, and will find it without him.
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 3:59 am
Shiori Miko He keeps showing you the sides of him that aren't perfect. I don't know if you're ignoring it or excusing it away. Any person who even suggest a sexual relationship when they know you still care for them is just....ugh. You deserve so much better than him Fortune, I just wish you could see that.
I don't deserve better and there ISN'T anyone better. He's a good person. Maybe I just haven't done a very good job of describing the situation. He still loves me. He just isn't sure yet if a relationship with me could work without him having to give up all his alone time and stuff. It's more like an experimental relationship than friends with benefits. That's just what he called it, so I said it, too.
So there's really not that much of a difference between what we had before and what we have now. The main difference is just that I have to get my emotions under control instead of coming to him with a billion stupid problems every day and making him help me with them. I also have to make sure not to pressure him to be around a lot because he needs alone time. It's like... he's giving me a chance to show him that I can be a better girlfriend than I was. It's not just about the sex. >.<
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 4:12 am
Miss Amelia Pond How do you know when you've met the right person? I want August to come, but at the same time... what if I'm wrong?
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 4:51 am
Little Miss Fortune Shiori Miko He keeps showing you the sides of him that aren't perfect. I don't know if you're ignoring it or excusing it away. Any person who even suggest a sexual relationship when they know you still care for them is just....ugh. You deserve so much better than him Fortune, I just wish you could see that.
I don't deserve better and there ISN'T anyone better. He's a good person. Maybe I just haven't done a very good job of describing the situation. He still loves me. He just isn't sure yet if a relationship with me could work without him having to give up all his alone time and stuff. It's more like an experimental relationship than friends with benefits. That's just what he called it, so I said it, too.
So there's really not that much of a difference between what we had before and what we have now. The main difference is just that I have to get my emotions under control instead of coming to him with a billion stupid problems every day and making him help me with them. I also have to make sure not to pressure him to be around a lot because he needs alone time. It's like... he's giving me a chance to show him that I can be a better girlfriend than I was. It's not just about the sex. >.<
What much is "a lot" anyway? If it were wanting to talk to him for a few minutes a day at the very least it doesn't seem like you'd be asking much. Even so, you really need to have yourself be your number one priority right now, not him or the relationship. You know you said a lot of things that weren't right. You need to learn to be happy without him and dependent on yourself. You can't have a healthy relationship when you're not capable of that on your own.
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 4:59 am
Shiori Miko Friends with benefits = Just friends who have sex with no emotional or romantic attachment. And even with what you are doing, it's best to leave the whole sexual aspect out until the actual relationship is stable. Been there and it's not a road you want to go down. Please just trust me on that.
What much is "a lot" anyway? If it were wanting to talk to him for a few minutes a day at the very least it doesn't seem like you'd be asking much. Even so, you really need to have yourself be your number one priority right now, not him or the relationship. You know you said a lot of things that weren't right. You need to learn to be happy without him and dependent on yourself. You can't have a healthy relationship when you're not capable of that on your own.
The sex is just a small bonus since both of us have been like... deprived since the breakup xp
I don't know how much a lot is. We used to talk for about an hour a night (pretty much every night). I don't think it's the amount of talking as much as the pressure to be there. I tried to make it clear to him that he didn't HAVE to get online every night, but I think he put a lot of that pressure on himself. I guess this time around, I need to make it even clearer.
Knowing that I shouldn't be dependent on him doesn't make it any easier not to depend on him. I'd LIKE to be all independent and everything, but I don't even know where to begin. It would probably be better to work on that while single, but I just CAN'T turn him down, so now I don't even know what to do. How do I become less dependent on him while still having him in my life?
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 5:06 am
I really genuinely hate you. There I said it.
I am fed up of all of this. This being stuck in a never ending cycle of debt and depression and anger. I spend ages looking for ******** jobs and nothing. I got an offer but I couldn't accept. The company wasn't exactly in the best position to be hiring, and well I can't actively sell to save my soul let alone for a job. But ******** my life seriously. Thank god for my friends I've been really busy the last week but now, everything has slowed down and stopped and I have nothing else to do or turn to and I'm sat here thinking how much this sucks. And how much I hate people. It's wonderful in that I don't feel bad about it at all. Usually I feel bad for hating someone but no, I have a valid reason and so it's fine.
I'm fed up of here as well. This site, this guild. It's dead and dying as far as I can tell, the occasional desperate push for activity here and there, and yet I can't leave. I know this place more often than not serves only to hack me off more, but I stay. I don't have anywhere else to go. Not through lack of trying but simply because I just don't. I feel like an outsider look in wherever I go here. In fact I feel like that more and more here. I just don't get it. I don't get the things so many of you find hilariously amusing, like ponies? WTF is with that? And don't give me a damn link, I don't care. I refuse to have something I loved as a child ruined again.
I'm fed up with all the two faced people, who on one side are lovely to you when you agree with them, but god forbid you should have a difference of opinion with anyone. My god my opinion is different! KILL IT WITH FIRE.
But then there are my friends who I wouldn't want to leave for anything in the world. You guys mean the world to me (not allowed to name drop though heart ). Without you guys I would be quite lost and there are quite a number of you. Many who may be gone from here or busy or whatever, but you're there.
/end rant
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 6:01 am
Cannibal Horsey I really genuinely hate you. There I said it.
I am fed up of all of this. This being stuck in a never ending cycle of debt and depression and anger. I spend ages looking for ******** jobs and nothing. I got an offer but I couldn't accept. The company wasn't exactly in the best position to be hiring, and well I can't actively sell to save my soul let alone for a job. But ******** my life seriously. Thank god for my friends I've been really busy the last week but now, everything has slowed down and stopped and I have nothing else to do or turn to and I'm sat here thinking how much this sucks. And how much I hate people. It's wonderful in that I don't feel bad about it at all. Usually I feel bad for hating someone but no, I have a valid reason and so it's fine.
I'm fed up of here as well. This site, this guild. It's dead and dying as far as I can tell, the occasional desperate push for activity here and there, and yet I can't leave. I know this place more often than not serves only to hack me off more, but I stay. I don't have anywhere else to go. Not through lack of trying but simply because I just don't. I feel like an outsider look in wherever I go here. In fact I feel like that more and more here. I just don't get it. I don't get the things so many of you find hilariously amusing, like ponies? WTF is with that? And don't give me a damn link, I don't care. I refuse to have something I loved as a child ruined again.
I'm fed up with all the two faced people, who on one side are lovely to you when you agree with them, but god forbid you should have a difference of opinion with anyone. My god my opinion is different! KILL IT WITH FIRE.
But then there are my friends who I wouldn't want to leave for anything in the world. You guys mean the world to me (not allowed to name drop though heart ). Without you guys I would be quite lost and there are quite a number of you. Many who may be gone from here or busy or whatever, but you're there.
/end rant *Hugs hugs hugs tight*
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 9:27 am
:c *hugs tight* I wish I could send you hugs and food and irn bru and a job and all the awesome stuff that you need. I'm sorry that things are so shitty for you right now. *hugs more*
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 9:29 am
Maris Pallitax :c *hugs tight* I wish I could send you hugs and food and irn bru and a job and all the awesome stuff that you need. I'm sorry that things are so shitty for you right now. *hugs more*
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Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 9:38 am
Warning: There's a lot of unnecessary swearing and raging and (for the more religious among us) blaspheming.
FIVE ********> WEEKS JESUS CHRIST ON A POPSICLE STICK IF I CAN JUST HOLD OUT FOR FIVE MORE WEEKS
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH WHARRGARBLL.
I don't want to wait any longer ******** damn it. YES I GET IT THIS IS WHY I AM SO DEPRESSED I GET IT OH SWEET BABY POLAR BEAR TESTICLES I GET IT
I look at my ******** cell phone calendar every few hours at least. It feels like no time is passing. Today marks the five-week point. Five more weeks... I just need to wait that long. crying Why can't you be here now... Who ever would have thought I would get so attached.
asdfg
asdjfgkgkdjaFJjahHKJfsjkhfjsf
So sick of crying and being sad and feeling this way.
Five weeks five weeks five weeks five weeks /fetal position
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