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 Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 1:27 am
I miss you so much. I miss who we were, I miss when we would used to laugh and talk about Kingdom Hearts all the time, when you hugged me when we were dragging the bins back, I miss when we were close friends. Slowly and gradually, I've been gaining feelings for you - or maybe I just miss who you were long ago. You're always looking at me during school times with pity or with worry or some other emotion. I long for your presence beside me and how you used to tease me and randomly bark or meow out of no where and stroke your invisible unicorn/cat/dog or whatever and make me laugh. I miss how you used to point to a cat and call it your dog- I miss our late night chats and how you used to spam me with that hugging emotion... I really miss you- I want to be your friend again.
----
I found out my friend's brother is Autistic. I'm worried about him and his surroundings in our school and how he's going to sink in. :c
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 2:37 am
Kamastr0 kittycross I'm tired. really really tired of managing everyone else's disabilities and problems and having no time for my own. I have one schizophrenic-bipolar husband, and two ocd bipolar children, one of whom is transgender and can no longer go to school because idiots there. I can't even find time to make my own psych appointments and at this rate I'm never going to get back into school and finish degrees.
I found out my husband had been mis-managing his med for the past 2 1/2 months and thats why he was feeling 'off.' Now he's caught in one of those loops of berating himself and is still no closer to being tested for Aspergers.
As if this wasn't enough on it's own. birthdays are coming up and Kawaiicon so there's all the pressure of want this and need that, while my exes who each owe thousands are going to send expensive gifts that i couldn't afford and I need to put together four cosplays by April. Not that we don't already have cosplay stuff, but the kids especially want new things and figure since i sew, sculpt and am to their reasoning artistically brilliant it should be no trouble to just whip up some fantastic on command.
I'm certainly not going to be able to make an Austria costume.
And I'm so tired of hearing people tell me how well I'm doing and how I keep everything together. some days I really wish suicide was an option.
Everyone is so edgy i have to cut discretely or things get worse *hugs you soo tightly* I wish I could help you =[
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 2:42 am
Yoru Kurosawa kittycross I'm tired....things get worse A tear is only water, a sigh is only air
D: *hugs tightly*
Whenever you feel haunted, the truth lies out there thanks smile
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 2:47 am
LifeSuxEatCake *hugs for kitty* Also... Good Omens! That book is amazing. Pratchett and Gaiman are such a good team <3 I kind of want to go re-read it now xD I just got new books from Pratchet and Gaiman to distract me. Unseen Academials and Fragile Things, respectively. I hope they do another collaborative work at some point
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 2:58 am
Raven dragonfire-Divinity Apparently because I stuck up for a dog who was howling from being stuck in a car, I'm an embarrasment. At least I'm not a ******** coward and I spoke up for an animal who couldn't themselves. Nan drove me home and I accidently put a hole in the wall. Problem is I can't hide the hole and I don't know how to fix it.
Bleeding to death or shooting myself seem like great ideas at the moment. I don't know where he hides the keys to the gun cabinet or to the ammo box unfortunately.
But now that I have typed that out I feel just a tiny bit better. Need to go and attempt to fix a wall..
I'm glad you're feeling a little better
I'm guessing drywall? you need Spackle and paint. Sandpaper is a plus for evening and finishing the spackle before painting. If the hole is big, you might need tape to bridge the gap before spackling.
Doors and walls didn't fair too well when I was growing up. Between my brother and myself it was pretty bad, but at least we learned how to repair damages.
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 3:09 am
@ Kittycross, you poor poor woman. I have no idea what to say other than MASSIVE HUGS FOR YOU.
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 4:13 am
kittycross Raven dragonfire-Divinity Apparently because I stuck up for a dog who was howling from being stuck in a car, I'm an embarrasment. At least I'm not a ******** coward and I spoke up for an animal who couldn't themselves. Nan drove me home and I accidently put a hole in the wall. Problem is I can't hide the hole and I don't know how to fix it.
Bleeding to death or shooting myself seem like great ideas at the moment. I don't know where he hides the keys to the gun cabinet or to the ammo box unfortunately.
But now that I have typed that out I feel just a tiny bit better. Need to go and attempt to fix a wall..
I'm glad you're feeling a little better
I'm guessing drywall? you need Spackle and paint. Sandpaper is a plus for evening and finishing the spackle before painting. If the hole is big, you might need tape to bridge the gap before spackling.
Doors and walls didn't fair too well when I was growing up. Between my brother and myself it was pretty bad, but at least we learned how to repair damages.
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 4:19 am
Raven dragonfire-Divinity kittycross Raven dragonfire-Divinity Apparently because I stuck up for a dog who was howling from being stuck in a car, I'm an embarrasment. At least I'm not a ******** coward and I spoke up for an animal who couldn't themselves. Nan drove me home and I accidently put a hole in the wall. Problem is I can't hide the hole and I don't know how to fix it.
Bleeding to death or shooting myself seem like great ideas at the moment. I don't know where he hides the keys to the gun cabinet or to the ammo box unfortunately.
But now that I have typed that out I feel just a tiny bit better. Need to go and attempt to fix a wall..
I'm glad you're feeling a little better
I'm guessing drywall? you need Spackle and paint. Sandpaper is a plus for evening and finishing the spackle before painting. If the hole is big, you might need tape to bridge the gap before spackling.
Doors and walls didn't fair too well when I was growing up. Between my brother and myself it was pretty bad, but at least we learned how to repair damages.
Glad I could help with the wall.
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 4:27 am
Cannibal Horsey @ Kittycross, you poor poor woman. I have no idea what to say other than MASSIVE HUGS FOR YOU.
This guild has such nice people in it
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 4:33 am
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 8:49 am
@Raven- *Hugs*
Dont shoot yourself =[ and not an embarrassment, animals need our more protection =[,You're definitely not an embarrassment =[, You're really a good and amazing person for sticking up for that dog.
@Emi-*hugs*
@Kitty- I really like the avie, But if there be anything I cans do let me know =]
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 11:57 am
I just found out why I can never get or have a girlfriend. No matter what I do or how I act, everyone sees me as a little brother. Apparently if you have the little brother status, you will be single for a long time. People will also exclude you from conversations they think you can't handle cause they think you're not mature enough to handle them and also don't think too highly of you. I'm going to have to change some things about me it seems.
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 2:01 pm
Tonight I will be going to protest for the rights for unions collective bargaining, which my states governor wants to strip away to fill in a budget gap which could have easily been fixed if say he lowered his own pay and perhaps the pay of a few other government employees and raised the taxes of some of the richer citizens and some corporations. But that would be using logic wouldn't it.
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 2:17 pm
Weird dream was weird. I dreamt that I was back in highschool playing Yu-Gi-Oh with some of my friends, which was pretty chill. And then the next minute we're all being chased by zebras with rabies (can zebras even get rabies?). We all end up cornered by some building and the characters from Yo Gabba Gabba jump down from the roof and we roast the zebras...
This might just be the most outrageous dream I've ever had.
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Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 4:07 pm
I just yelled/fussed at my dad about his alcoholism. I hope he listens.
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