Welcome to Gaia! ::

Ah, the good ol' days. Back when FP would try and counter me... Speaking of which, the younglin's don't know of the legend of Neo-Santa, do they?

For over 1000 posts he was the defender of Peace and Justice in the Gaian forums. Before the Dark Times, before the new age of gaia....

Ah. Back in the days I had hair....


A suave long haired, redhead who is dressed in a candycane colored scarf and gloves, red elfish boots, jinglebells, a hat and orange glasses. He wields a pitchfork of coal to deal to naughty people. He is more forgiving and more gracious than a PaleoSanta, also more studly.

Unlike the PaleoSanta, NeoSanta is not a fat man who rides around in a sleigh pulled by reindeer and gives coal to naughty kids. Quite on the contrary, NeoSanta drives around in an Enzo Ferarri and R.U.D.O.L.P.H. (Rudamentary Undercover Danger Operated Levitation Producing Hat), and enjoys naughty girls who promise to be better next year.

But beware, fools people are to be naughty when NeoSanta is around. Armed with Matrix powers, he is "The One" who will bring about a revolution in the gifts and punishment. He will freely deal out Thermonuclear weaponry to Good children, but if you find your a** hurts and has three holes in it, you have been struck by NeoSanta's infamous coal pitchfork.

NeoSanta does not worry however. Even though the PaleoSantas are jealous of NeoSanta's looks and style, a greater foe exists. Due to a hatred for the consistant mistletoe in Gaiaonline.com, NeoSanta accidently released the monster known as MISTLETOE-SMITH, an entity that is neither virus nor plant, which wishes to consume Gaia in an effort of copying itself. It breeds by infecting xmas trees and other plants, and is a consistant threat.

But, NeoSanta will prevail, or the entire Gaiaonline.com community will forever be forced to be kissed by strangers, and noobish people in the chatterbox....

I remember..


Before the whippersnappers came. This was once..

Go-gaia.com...

I remember I had the chance to get an Angelic Sash when they were still cheap, but I was like 1k short and never did get one.

Now I'm several million short.

Ah. Kissing.
The thing they did before rampant pumping, probing and biting.

Yeah... At one time, the great Neo-Santa pardoned over fifty naughty gaian girls, whom would be purified by his mighty power.

But as the forums became more and more noobish, Neo-Santa had lost hope, almost.... He will come out of retirement this year, however, and not just for one day.

I joined when the Personals were running full and strong. It was pretty horrible.

More like ..

'Look at my underaged n***s via Gaia'. Made me vomit.