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 Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 2:45 pm
[' Most of the people in the pack didn't like ghosts. ' Wth did that line have to do with anything?
Edit. Also you've introduced way to many people at once it gets hard to understand who's more important and who's not.]
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 2:46 pm
=P Felt necessary to point it out.
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 2:50 pm
[It doesn't fit though one minute you're saying these people are doing this and this person is doing this then suddenly they don't like ghost. :I
I get the next part she's sad her lovers been away for awhile but there's a bunch of stuff that you have to struggle through or thats repeated. You added even more people in as well.
Far to many characters at once for only a first chapter.]
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 2:51 pm
Hm. =P Mmkay. I'll try to work on that then.
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 2:51 pm
Yeah kitty's right, one thing you shouldn't do is introduced so many characters at first.
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 2:52 pm
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 2:53 pm
Hello eno~
eno my bubble D:
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 2:54 pm
[I stopped reading I was suffering.]
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 2:55 pm
You're so nice, Cheshy =w=
Chapter two's gonna better...hopefully.
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 2:56 pm
Started Reading Fairy Tail yesterday.. biggrin Good to see Pule again..
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 3:01 pm
Oops, forgot it Lotti. *goes to change*
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 3:02 pm
[What? You want the truth or for me to go 'its so good ='D' ?]
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 3:03 pm
The truth, obviously. =P But if ya don't finish it, you probably won't understand chapter two.
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 3:03 pm
XD Halloween week for the guild will not be different.
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 3:06 pm
Not really Maddi. xD
*still lurves Sanny's idea*
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