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"No. No not dissappointed in you. Not at all, just..." He shook his head, and just stared out to sea blankly. He felt about ready to burst. He shouldn't be upset, he should be helping her feel, better, he shouldn't- "I-I've just been really happy, maybe only today and yesterday, but it's been so long since I've really just felt happy. Nine years. I-I just... I've been having all sorts of stupid day dreams today. I knew they were stupid. I just, couldn't stop, I was elated with all these... perfect versions of life my mind kept coming up with. I've been having all sorts of day dreams of... just... us marrying eventually, you to be my first, I yours... and... living life with you and... not having to worry about people after my life... and dreaming... that I- I... I'd never been an assassin... never died... that..." He broke off. His voice was choked, but he wasn't crying. He just stared out at the ocean, as he kept trying to keep talking, to get all the broken dreams that had never made sense out. "I... I just shouldn't have thought any of that, it's all been stupid of me, I'm sorry. I'm sorry... I just... kept thinking that with how good everything suddenly seemed... maybe... all these other little fantasies could... and, you know, with one shot down I finally can stop telling myself the others might happen... and... I could stop being so stupid and just be happy you could put up with me now... and just..." He broke down sobbing at last, just slightly, still staring out at the sea. "I-I... I'm sorry... Morgan... I just... I'm sorry..."

"No... maybe... it's all just unreasonable, and I just needed this to show me that. None of it can happen. Morgan... I can't get rid of my past... and... it's all just stupid fantasies. Morgan, y-you don't have to stay by me, I can't ask you to, not after this. I'm sorry... go ahead on to that party. Just foget about me, I shouldn't have to put you through this. I'm just... I'm sorry." He tried to stop himself crying, and managed after a moment, but he couldn't get his voice to stop shaking. He just stood and stared out at the sea. He couldn't make himself look at her, not after what he must have just done to her. To make her listen to all these things he was stupid enough to be upset about when she probably was going through something serious at that time, whether he knew about it or not. Rivven was surprised she hadn't gotten mad at him for admitting he'd had ideas of marrying her or... doing other things. "Thank you Morgan, but ... I just..." No idea what to say, he let himself trail off.

For a long time, Rivven just sat, feeling sorry for himself, and wishing he could stop himself from doing this. Eventually though, he stopped, and just stood quietly, holding her hand. After that he wasn't sure what to say, but that had happened to him so many times already. This time he had to say something. He squeezed her hand gently, and opened his mouth for a moment before he spoke. "Morgan... can I ask you.... why you're still here? You don't have to stay... I'm not going to ask you to do anything you don't want to but... what could you possibly see and like in me? Especially after this. What makes you think I could possibly be worth the trouble? You deserve better than to stand by me out here."

Rivven turned to look at her this time. He just stared in surprise for a moment, and then he laughed, just slightly, a soft, quiet laugh. "You're right. Maybe the only stupid thing I've been doing is doubting that." He smiled and took a step a little bit closer to her, kissing her on the cheek. "Will you accept my apologies?"

"Thank you." He said, and gave her a quick little kiss on the lips, smiling with relief and other mixed emotions. "And don't worry, it was a hopelessly romantic series of day dreams I'm afraid. But I'm done feeling sorry for myself I think. After all, I've still got you, what more do I need?" He looked out at the sea again, but this time enjoyed it, taking a deep breath of the coastline night air, and watching the reflections of the stars twinkle on it's shifting surface. "Well, do you want to do something else now? We could go to that party you'd said something about earlier. Or we could go swimming, you brought that up yesterday but we never got around to it, did we?" Honestly Rivven had yet to realize that would have meant the removal of clothes. He went into water fully dressed when he did go into it, except for when he bathed.

((I gotta go now. Sorry. I won't be on tommorrow either, but maybe I'll see you sunday or monday.))

"See...? Oh... I'm sorry... I-I didn't think... I normally swim with my clothes on... but if you want... I'd be alright with it..." He said, a blushing a bright red yet again. It seemed to be becoming a common thing. "The party would be fine as well. I still consider myself a newer member actually, but I'd be alright getting to meet some people there. I really know very few people as of right now..."

Rivven met her eyes, and when Morgan blushed, he suddenly realized what her answer was, and quickly turned his head way from her fumbling with the cord, averting his eyes and continueing to turn even brighter red. It was really embarassing... but he'd offered it to her to decide rather than choosing himself... and if she was taking her clothes off was it really right for him to leave his on? He failed miserably in trying to stop blushing, and tried to figure out whether he was more embarassed about letting her see the brand-like scars on his back and right forearm, or taking off his pants. He almost decided the first two, but opted to turn away from her to undress instead, at the last moment. He started by removing his coat, folding it and placing it neatly on the ground. After which, he took off his sandals and laid them beside, folding his socks and placing each on the sandal it had been under. He continued methodically, forcing himself to remove the left elbow length glove, pulling on the point where it cut off around his knuckles, and then the right, exposing the large, ornately complex and twisting design around the gauntleted fist in the center of the scar. Making himself keep going, he took off the tight shirt, from under which a similair but larger, more ornate scar was revealed, in it's center a phoenix instead of a fist. He stopped to take a deep breath, half way through, looking straight away from both her and the somewhat pale skin he was exposing. He took off his pants, folding them and laying them down with the rest of his clothes, and stopped again, for a long moment before very slowly removing his undergarment likewise.