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Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 12:50 am
Anna Rabi I was a bad scientist. The data was all around me, and I ignored it, dismissed it because it didn't fit into my preconceived notions of a rational universe. I scoffed at the String Theorists in my department, whose vision extended into dimensions and timelines beyond the ones we see, and feel, and experience.
I was Einstein, rejecting Quantum Mechanics because "God doesn't play dice with the universe..." Now I too, spend my days searching for Superunification, that Theory of Everything that can accommodate the life of my miracle child...and the changes in me... This is the journal of Anna Rabi, PhD, chronicling her experiences with the Cambrian child, Dickinsonia costata, named Nova, and her subsequent research into the nature of the universe. This journal is covered by a number of academic and non-academic protections. Improper use or modification of this journal without the written permission of Dr. Rabi is strictly prohibited. Pikaia's Children (c) Coronaviridae Nova's art (c) Polecat Junkie
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Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 12:57 am
[1] -- Title and Introduction [2] -- Table of Contents <--- You are here! [3] -- Anna [4] -- Nova [5] -- Connections [6] -- Dickinsonia costada [7] -- Photo Gallery [8] -- From Anna's Personal Diary
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Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 1:26 am
  Name: Anna Elizabeth Rabi, PhD Age: 33 Gender: Female Hair: Dark Blonde Eyes: Grey Height: 5'4" Most Recent Occupation: Particle Physicist Marital Status: Divorced
Family: Father is a small-time televangelist, noted for his embrace of the Cambrians into the fold of God. Mother is a freelance photographer. One younger brother, a filmaker whose last known whereabouts are "somewhere in California."
History: Raised to be independent by her mother -- who tried being a stay-at-home mom once and nearly went insane -- Anna threw herself into the hard sciences, particularly physics, in college, not phased at all by the relative dearth of women in the field. From her father, Anna inherited a passion for theology, and studied it nearly as studiously as her quantum mechanics. She perceives an elegant intertwining between an intelligent faith and the science underpinning the universe. At the same time, though, she attacks String Theory as "unprovable fluff, the stuff of dreams" for granting the possibility of other timelines and alternate dimensions, a stance she will most likely regret in the future...Anna's Last Supervisor Anna is independent, almost to a fault, though some of that may be left over from her rather messy divorce from Business Professor Karl Masterson. She's self-contained, very focused, except for her occasional forays into the theological realm. Mostly personable, if a little combatative towards the String Theory group. Not overly social, she appears to enjoy her little bubble up on the 8th floor...
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Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 1:28 am
 Here she is, Miss America... sweatdrop 
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Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 1:29 am
Nobody yet, but not for long... ninja
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Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 1:37 am
 Dickinsonia is known from Vendian rocks of south Australia and north Russia. It is often considered to be an annelid worm because of its apparent similarity to one genus of extant polychaete, Spinther. However, in the opinion of some, it may in fact be a cnidarian polyp, like a soft-bodied version of the "banana coral," Fungia. Source: University of California Museum of Paleontology
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Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 1:38 am
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Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 1:40 am
 Anna's Diary Dreams... Crazy things, dreams... I always seem to wake with such a feeling of regret. Maybe that's because I always seem to dream about what might have been, if only... ~ If I'd been brave enough to keep pursuing that shy sweetheart back in high school... ~ If I'd never married Karl in the first place... ~ If I'd had that baby I wanted to have back in graduate school... ~ If I'd become a writer instead of a scientist... I woke up with that same regret this morning, but I'm not sure why. My dreams last night, were scattered, hazy, more sensation than storyline. Flashes of open sky. The strangest sensation of wind on skin that barely felt like it was mine. And the smells...scents that I've never smelled before...and yet I felt them more familiar, more intimately known than the smell of leaves falling in October. So strange and yet so real...just like that faint glow coming from the fish tank. The...egg?...radioactive blob?...looks so small in that sixteen gallon tank. But maybe that's just because I got used to seeing Val in there, and she got to be such a huge thing for a goldfish... And now the coffee's done, so off to another day at the accelerator...
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Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 1:41 am
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Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 1:43 am
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Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 5:59 pm
This is a beach like any other; an anonymous stretch of sand bordered by the vast emptiness of the moonlit sea, breaking down the continent wave by wave. At this time of night few the beach is deserted, and anyone out for a stroll might imagine themselves to be in a different era. The lights of houses and tip-top resorts are hidden -- perhaps by cliffs, fog, or distant rain. The only artifical lights that reach the water's edge are filtered and strange. Ghost-lights.
There is something beneath the waves that isn't a reflection of the somehow sepulchural lights. It rolls and tumbles closer with the steady churning of the waves, its glow obscured now by sand, now by seaweed, now by the action of the dark water. It will soon reach the shore. Upon close inspection, the glimmering object appears to be a fragile ovoid. Through the translucent membrane a tiny coin-shaped scrap of life can be seen, shining with a fierce light as it floats within its private chamber.
When the air touches it (and it will, if it is carried too close to shore), the light stutters and fades. Now there is nothing to cut the darkness but the crescent-moon and the distant, watery lights of human civilization.
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Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2006 8:18 pm
The steady drone of frantic human life receded slowly as she approached the shore. Step by step, the burdens of the week lifted, drifting away on the ocean of fog -- the latest breakdown at the accelerator, that disastrous faculty meeting, the triumphant smirk on her ex-husband's face...
"Damn him..." Anna whispered. But this too disappeared into the mist, leaving her alone with the moonshine and fairy lights at the water's edge, at that strange junction between stillness and motion, silence and sound. Nothing mundane -- nothing human -- belonged in this place.
She cast her gaze out over the water, watching the moonlight and the filtered glow of distant homes dance among the waves -- the interplay of reflection and refraction among the miracles of Maxwell's Equations. And yet the dynamics of electromagnetic waves was far from Anna's mind.
A pinpoint of light blinked brightly from a distant wave. Far too luminous to be the reflection of a human light, and the wrong color for moonlight, it bobbed up and down, right and left, a random walk among the waves, headed inorexably toward the shore. It weaved in and out of sight several times, always slipping back into sight just as Anna became sure it was forever gone. At long last, it swirled into the tiny tide pool at Anna's feet.
A soft elliptical blob bobbed slowly in the water, a tiny disk inside glowing brightly with life, the source of the otherworldly illumination. The light was glowing dimmer now, moment by moment, as it swam in as much air as water. Kneeling in the wet sand, Anna bent to get a closer look...
It couldn't be...
She didn't even believe in...
Dumping out the contents of her ever-present coffee mug into the sand, and rinsing it a few times in the salty waves, Anna carefully scooped up the egg and surrounding water into the thermally insulated interior. Brushing the sand off her jeans, she headed back to the car, feeling equal parts wonder and foolishness.
Oh well...
At least for tonight, she'd put that insanely huge fish tank her ex-husband refused to haul away to some good use...if only she could find the aquarium salt...
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Posted: Fri Sep 29, 2006 3:12 pm
Anna's Diary Dreams... Crazy things, dreams... I always seem to wake with such a feeling of regret. Maybe that's because I always seem to dream about what might have been, if only... ~ If I'd been brave enough to keep pursuing that shy sweetheart back in high school... ~ If I'd never married Karl in the first place... ~ If I'd had that baby I wanted to have back in graduate school... ~ If I'd become a writer instead of a scientist... I woke up with that same regret this morning, but I'm not sure why. My dreams last night, were scattered, hazy, more sensation than storyline. Flashes of open sky. The strangest sensation of wind on skin that barely felt like it was mine. And the smells...scents that I've never smelled before...and yet I felt them more familiar, more intimately known than the smell of leaves falling in October. So strange and yet so real...just like that faint glow coming from the fish tank. The...egg?...radioactive blob?...looks so small in that sixteen gallon tank. But maybe that's just because I got used to seeing Val in there, and she got to be such a huge thing for a goldfish... And now the coffee's done, so off to another day at the accelerator...
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Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2006 9:32 pm
Smooth undulation in a crystalline green sea. Motionless movement through the void. Uncountable stars like jewels. Strange seasons have shaped the world before you. The coastlines are unfamiliar; the continents are vibrantly, impossibly green. The planet glows like a jewel itself against the backdrop of space. Upon closer inspection millions of tiny settlements can be seen winking among the forest which covers all but the poles. The surface of the planet flashes by, revealing no overt war or conflict. It is peaceful, at least at first. But as you draw closer you can feel a current of change just beneath the surface. This is a place waiting for a spark. You land and walk among the achingly familiar people. Their beloved faces cannot be recalled upon awakening. The green dream world spun off from your waking world aeons ago. Memories of the dream disperse upon awakening, but the dream itself is persistant. It may haunt you for many days, and is sure to grow particularly intense on one evening. In the morning (or in the middle of the night, if your dream awakens you), you will find your fish tank occupied by a soft greenish-yellow blob. Its ovoid body has distinct rays, but you can't see any obvious eyes or mouth. The funny flat blob-beast undulates peacefully around the aquarium, projecting a feeling of contentment. Evidently it's satisfied with its new home. As the light hits it it gleams with the last traces of that eerie golden glow. Congratulations on your new lumplet.
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Posted: Fri Dec 01, 2006 3:37 pm
The moonlight was the wrong color...
Wrenched awake, the bittersweet joy that had permeated Anna's dream gave way sharply to disorientation, followed gradually by a strange sense of loss. Reluctantly releasing the pillow she'd been clinging to for dear life, Anna crawled out of bed and crossed over to the window. Bathed in the silvery light from overhead, she was struck again by the strangest feeling that the color palette of the whole scheme was wrong somehow.
"There should be more green," she murmured. And the moon...
-splash-
In the late-night silence, the faint splash was more than enough to scatter the last of Anna's dream thoughts. For a moment, her time-sense slipped. She was sure that if we went out into the livingroom, she would find Karl sitting in the flow of his computer screen, and big ol' Val splashing around in her tank. Irritated, Anna went out to call her errant husband to bed.
But both husband and fish were long gone...Anna paused in the hallway, reality finally settling in her sleep-addled brain. She was in here all al-
-splash-
Anna flipped on the livingroom light and knelt down in front of the tank.
"Impossible..." she whispered, fingers brushing the thick, cool glass.
Her "fog-fueled fantasy" eggs had given way to some sort of yellow-green...thing. It skittered softly around the aquarium, touching gravel, plastic plants, exploring the strange rock fortress with the soft countours of its blob-ish body. When Anna appeared in the glass, it scurries (can a blob be said to scurry?) to the front of the tank to look (without eyes?) at the new arrival.
Anna smiled in wonder and the soft ovoid blob gave off a faint glow that somehow felt like a smile being returned.
"I should call you something..." Anna said thoughtfully, eyes riveted by the ray pattern tracing the creature's body, as if some sort of magical explosion had brought it to life, and etched it's mark on the green surface.
"Nova..." she tried out the name. "You look like a star-chile, and you're as precious as the heavy elements that only come out of great stellar events."
The feeling of being silly for talking to a lump faded quickly as the creature again glowed a bright "smile", before drifting gently behind the castle, seemingly the favored sleeping space of all tankdwellers.
Anna could almost feel its (or her, she decided) peaceful sleepiness. Yawning herslef, Anna turned off the light and left Nova in her tank, the glow softly fading.
"Sweet dreams..."
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