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EWA WhatIf?: Matt Shanahan vs Saint Joey: Sprocket Champion! Goto Page: 1 2 3 [>] [»|]

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Extremist-Saint-Joey

PostPosted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 5:55 pm


Let me take you back... to 2011.
Back when Saint Joey was still alive, and the EWA Sprocket Champion.
Scheduled to face Matt Shanahan, then "The Black Star," he turned up to the EWA arena.
But his opponent did not.
Replaced by Freakshow, they had a match which has gone down in history.
But... What if that match didn't happen?
What if Matt Shanahan had shown up?
This is that story.


”Saint Jimmy” by Green Day blares across the arena...

St. Joey's coming down across the alleyway...
Up on the boulevard like a zip gun on parade...
Lights on the silhouette...
He's insubordinate...
Coming at you on the count of One, Two...

One, Two, Three, Four!

A single pyro erupts from the base of the titantron, sending a shower of sparks onto the steel ramp below. The sparks are suddenly broken as Saint Joey leaps through the centre, protected from the sparks by a mask, hovering in the air! Smoke pours from his back, out of two pipes. He appears to be wearing some sort of jet pack. A spotlight shines down on him, reflecting beautifully off of his EWA Sprocket Championship belt. He raises his sceptre above his head, before gently floating down. As the smoke stops, his long coat sways in the remaining breeze. The pack detaches from his back, and falls to the ground with a loud thud, as Joey lifts his championship belt above his head with pride.

He looks down, before raising his head and stretching his arms out wide in a crucifix shape, the title belt hanging from his arm. The spotlight is still shining over him as he grins, before a sudden flash of light fills the arena with a bright, warm white light.

He slowly walks down to the ring, wrapping the belt around his waist before breaking out into a run, sliding into the ring under the bottom rope. He slides for a second before pushing himself to his feet, grin still in tact, and heads to the far turnbuckle. He jumps to the second rope, putting his hand over his eyes, looking over the audience as he takes off the mask. After a few seconds he drops the mask to the floor, lowering his arms to his sides and stands still, before taking a small jump to the top rope and flipping backwards to the mat, his coat swirling around, before landing on his feet. He rolls his shoulders back and bends his knees, taking off his coat and throwing it to the ropes. He then cracks his knuckles and shakes his head from side to side, followed by him asking for a microphone.

"Ladies and Gentlemen... Tramps and Harlots... Introducing to you your FIRST EVERRRR - and, by default, longest reigning - EWA SPROCKET CHAMPION... SAAAAIIIIINT -********- JOOOOEEEEYYY."

The crowd booed at the thought that this man, who had done nothing but mock and despise them, was the holder of any championship, let alone one as prestigious as the EWA Sprocket championship.

"Now now... Calm down everybody, I know you are all exited to see, quite simply, the GREATEST man on the EWA roster. And I know how you were all looking forward to me putting down the Black Star, the biggest white man that I know, Matt Shanahan... and so was I. In fact, as I readied my exhalted arsenal, preparing to destroy the star and send him to Hell, I got a message from management... A little memo, saying that Matt Shanahan might not be here. That he might be... Pre-occupied with other matters. Somehow, somewhere, something is apparently more important than this EWA Sprocket championship. Now, excuse me for being a little insulted... But why should I waste my time, coming out all the way to this... this HOLE of a city..."

Cheap heat! Cheap heat! Damn him! Damn him to Hell!

"When Matt Shanahan can't even be bothered to come out here and face me. Man to Shanahan. Champion, to loser. He's starting to look more like a Red Dwarf than a Black Star. It's pathetic... This is unjust. I'M THE CHAMPION! I'm the one who should be out there, relaxing while all of the other peasants come out here and perform. But still, I come out here, to prove I am the best, against the best. And do you know something? That's how I got to the top here. That's how I became the EWA Sprocket Champion. That is how I became known as a dominant force in EWA, and many, many other cliches."

Joey took the title belt from around his waist, and raised it above his head. He no longer had that oh-so cocky grin; instead, on his face, he held a look of contempt, of disgust.

"So, here's the thing; Shanahan, you can get out here, right now, wherever you are, and fight me. Or instead, the main event of this PPV will be ruined... and it will all be on your head. Not mine. Saint Joey, THE bad guy, will be the one who wasn't responsible for this mess. And I guarantee you, Shanahan, I GUARANTEE that as long as I am the champion, you will never, EVER, get a shot at this hallowed EWA Championship."

The crowd really aren't sure how to react to what Joey is saying. Joey was becoming enraged, angry at what was going down tonight.

"This title means the WORLD to me. I worked my a** off for many, many long years, festering in the middle of a swamp of wrestling, before FINALLY breaking out and being crowned a champion. An ELITE champion. And I will not let YOU ruin the prestige of this title! I will NOT let you make ME A JOKE GOD DAMN IT! GET OUT HERE AND FACE ME NOW!"

Joey angrily threw the microphone out of the ring, and stamped his foot on the ground. The crowd could see his apparent anger, and were anxious to see what was going to happen.

Several moments passed...

Joey tapped his foot as he waited for Shanahan to make his appearance. After a few minutes, when it looked like Matt wasn't going to show, Joey asked for a microphone, and lifted it to his mouth once more.

"No? Don't want to face me tonight? That's it. I've had it. Matt, you cretinous coward, how DARE you not turn up! I have given my life - MY WHOLE LIFE - to wrestle! To win championships! And you... Disrespect me. Disrespect! ME! Like a filthy peasant... Like one of THESE people!"

Joey raised his forward, pointed his finger, and waved it across the entire audience. They all jeered, unhappy at what he was saying. Joey scowled, his anger rising like a volcano's magma.

"Oh yes, boo me. Go on, boo me you hypocrites, boo me! Boo the man who has turned up to defend his title for your entertainment! Boo the man who has given his hallowed life to wrestle before you! Well you know what!? I've had enough! If you cheer a man who doesn't even CARE enough to come out here in front of you, then why the HELL should I be out here!? Huh!? I'm the EWA Sprocket champion! THE FIRST EVER! AND YOU WILL SHOW ME SOME GOD-DAMN RESPECT!!"

Joey's face became one of pure rage, angered at the world he was performing for.

"Judas! Every single one of you! <******** JUDAS!! You betray me! You betray your EWA SPROCKET CHAM-"
PostPosted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 6:41 pm


The sound of crashing drumbeats broke over the arena, sending the lights into a seizure all across the arena. With the final hit, darkness descended over the crowd, while a synthesizer and bassline flooded the speakers.

"First Person Shooter" - Celldweller

Strobing lights began search the arena for signs of the source, only stopping when they landed on the man standing on the stage. With his black cloak clinging to his shoulders and hood pulled over his face, none were sure exactly who he was. The legendary black baseball bat in his right hand gave him away though. Could it truly be? Was Shanahan actually showing up to his match?

With the final strobe landing on him, the arena's lights flashed on with an eerie red haze. Like a fleeting shadow, the man stormed down the ramp towards the ring, his cloak flowing over his shoulders and billowing in his wake. Around his waist was... the EWA Sprocket Championship? The same one Joey held in his hands just mere yards away. Except his title clearly read "Matt Shanahan," not "Saint Joey."

Before the song even managed to make it to the crescendo, Shanahan slid into the ring and pushed himself up to his feet, making a B-line right towards the true champion. Luckily for both of them, the referee jumped in the way and pushed him back, halting all progress towards an early match. With his free left hand, Matt ripped his hood back to reveal himself fully, his strand of red bangs hanging over his right eye. <******** you!" He roared at his once best friend, before grabbing the middle of his cloak and yanking it off, throwing it to the outside afterwards. Underneath, he wore a pair of plain, black jeans, leaving the rest of his tattooed body to the exposure of the fans. The rightful champion stormed over the corner of the ring and picked up a microphone as the music cut away.

"Lemme say that again for you, b***h boy, in case you couldn't hear me, I know your head is shoved too far up Chrono's a** these days, I said ******** YOU!" Matt roared into the microphone, showing off The Black Star's natural fury to his best friend. He faced the Saint in the middle of the ring, staring him down like he were nothing more than a pathetic nuisance. "Now!... I'm gonna say this real slow for your British a**, because I know you've gotten really ********' dumb since you turned your back on -our- Alliance..." Matt's rage disappeared instantly, reverting to a calm state few had ever seen the Black Star in. Very slowly, he reached around his waist and pulled the belt off, then hoisting it high in the air for the world to see.

"... This contest... is scheduled for one fall, and is for the EWA Sprocket Championship... introducing first... the challenger, weighing in at ******** YOU and hailing from You're-The-Biggest-s**t-Stain-In-The-World, ********... The True Peasant, Saaaaaaint JOEY!" Matt hissed into the microphone, glaring at his former best friend after showing him true disrespect.

"... And the opponent, weighing in at 326 pounds, hailing Philadelphia, Pennsylvania... He is -The- Black Star! He is -The- Angered Alliance! HE IS THE TRUE EWA SPROCKET CHAMPION!" Shanahan nearly screamed into the man's face, not even needing a microphone at this point, "... MATT! SHANAHAN!" He looked up at the ceiling for a long moment, then back down to his opponent. The actual champion. "And lower that goddamn cell!" With that, the rightful champion threw the microphone the outside and backed away from Joey, glaring at him as the Cell above the ring lowered... It was gonna be Hell in A Cell!

Punkology


Extremist-Saint-Joey

PostPosted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 6:58 pm


Joey stared into Matt's eyes, their burning gaze meeting in pure mutual rage. However, it didn't last long; when Matt finished speaking, Joey's stiffened features twisted into a sick, familiar grin.

"Was... Was this your plan, Matt? Tell me. I know you aren't stupid. I know what you're doing. You're trying to rile me. God damn, you're trying to piss me off, trying SO HARD. The waiting? The insults? Haha. I should have seen it coming a thousand yards away. I mean, I was your partner, wasn't I? Ha. How silly.

But you know, Matt, that's the difference between us. I didn't betray the team, Matt. YOU betrayed the team. You betrayed it the second you thought so LITTLE of me, thought I was so AMATEUR, that I wouldn't see through this ruse. Jesus Christ, Shanahan. Black Star? You're dimmer than black. You've almost gone full retard.

Not this time, Matt. The Angered Alliance is one person, now. Just you. Sad, and angry, and alone. I'm not angered, Matt. I've come to terms with my anger. Come to terms with this..."

Joey raised the REAL Sprocket championship high into the air, his grin becoming a full-on smile.

"... Much better than you have. I'm the breakout! The main man! And you will bow before a Saint... or you will cower before me!"

The cell had nearly touched the floor. Joey began to chuckle.

"I've waited a long time to go to Hell. Will you join me, brother? Or shall I send you there alone? In this arena, in this cell, in this ring, you will be sent down, to dance in the flames. Not by your friend, or your partner, but by... the one, the only, the ULTIMATE MACHO MAN! THE GRIM REAPER'S PEN PAL!

SAAAAAAIIIII-
"
PostPosted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 7:06 pm


Matt had moved to the corner and taken his eyes off his former friend while he rambled on. He dropped -his- title belt into the corner along with his baseball bat, taking inventory of his belongings. Everything he said went way over the head of Shanahan, who simply didn't give a damn...

Until he said the one thing that got to him. Sad, angry, and alone. For some reason, that sparked something in The Black Star's core. Something about that sentence really pissed him off. He looked over his shoulder at Saint Joey as he called himself the 'main man.' Did he really think he could make a fallen God bow to someone as lowly as a saint? Did he think that he could just...

What did it matter what he thought, anyways? Matt was already pissed and he wasn't going to continue questioning himself on this. He turned to face his former AA brother right as he began to scream his own name. Like a shooting star, The Black Star hurled forward and aimed to tackle the man to mat with his brute force! If successful, he'd scramble to mount the 'champion' and deliver a meteor shower of furious fists onto the Saint's face!

Punkology


Extremist-Saint-Joey

PostPosted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 7:25 pm


Joey was taken down mid-speech, the mic flying off to the outside of the ring from the sheer force of Matt's tackle. As the fists started flying, and the bell rang, Joey did all that he could to cover-up. Managing to block several blows - enough to keep him in the game, at least - Joey tried to crawl back, pushing until he could reach the ropes and crawl out of the ring. Not an auspicious start for a champion, but he was not ready for the surprise attack, and needed to survive this early assault!
PostPosted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 7:28 pm


Matt let his prey crawl away, not bothering to give chase. It was rare that he ever did. Instead, he pushed himself to his feet and glared at Joey with his teeth bared. "C'mon, you limey ********! It's just you and me! This is what you wanted! Come an' ********' get it!" The Black Star taunted his brother, attempting to goad him to re-enter combat!

Punkology


Extremist-Saint-Joey

PostPosted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 7:36 pm


Joey rolled out of the ring, landing hard on his back. His first, more cowardly instinct was to run. However, the cage surrounding them put a stop to that before the idea even occurred. He crawled to where the microphone landed. Quickly formulating a plan, he concealed it with his body, grasping it in his right hand. Feigning exhaustion, breathing heavily, he stayed down, before looking up towards Shanahan.

"Just you, you sad ******** raised his left arm, his middle finger pointing as he insulted his former tag partner.
PostPosted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 8:40 pm


"Wrong answer, b***h boy," Matt snarled in response, no longer tolerating the words of the Saint. He stormed over to the ropes and nearly jumped over them with his smooth step-over, soon finding himself on the apron and then on the mats below. His eyes locked onto Joey with a cold flame in his eyes. "I'll drag you in myself, you pathetic dog!" The Black Star commanded as he marched over to the man, aiming to grab him by the hair and force him to his feet!

Punkology


Extremist-Saint-Joey

PostPosted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 8:44 pm


Joey's reverse-anger tactic seemed to have worked. He let Matt pull him up - ripping some of his hairs out as it happened, no less - but would quickly try to reverse the situation by tonking him on the noggin with the concealed microphone! He had no intention of going back in the ring yet; this one was going to be a fight, not a wrestling match!
PostPosted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 8:58 pm


The Black Star's anger captivated him at the wrong time, which was rather typical for him honestly. The microphone cracked against his head, sending him stumbling backwards from Joey! With a hand on his head, he turned away and fell to a knee while continuing to increase the distance between him and his former partner.

Punkology


Extremist-Saint-Joey

PostPosted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 9:01 pm


Joey's plan worked to perfection, as they so often do (*cough*). He grinned as he threw the microphone nonchalantly to the side, letting it hit the ground with a static thud. He would keep a close offense, aiming to approach Matt to grab his head and drive a hard knee into his temple!
PostPosted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 9:24 pm



Punkology


Extremist-Saint-Joey

PostPosted: Thu Jan 02, 2014 7:24 am


Suddenly, the tide had turned in Joey's favour. Grinning once more, he planned his next move, designed to devastate the challenger and ruin his chances of victory. He would go to Matt's legs, and would attempt to swing him around, so his head crashed into the steel cell! If that was successful, he would quickly swing him the other way, aiming to give him two headaches!
PostPosted: Thu Jan 02, 2014 11:36 am


Matt's head was in a world of hurt after the harsh knee to his temple; it was like every match he was in, his head was the target! But as he was laying there, he felt someone start to wrap their arms around his legs, indicating that he needed to get the ******** outta there. In an attempt to retaliate, Matt leaned up and attempted to grab onto his former partner's head and pull him downward, hopefully stalling his assault!

Punkology


Extremist-Saint-Joey

PostPosted: Thu Jan 02, 2014 2:45 pm


Joey's arms where wrapped around Matt's legs, and as such he had no way to defend himself as Matt hoisted himself up and pulled him down, in what could be described as a desperate monkey flip. Joey flipped over him, falling to the side, but not sustaining enough damage to keep him down; he shot straight back to his feet as soon as he gained his bearings.
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