a new beginning

there are several chapters to this story, how long have you been reading?

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[eggawoo]

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xx𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐧𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐮　◞ 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐞𝐫 ｡
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Diane's glass was empty before she knew it. She sighed as she set it down on the counter, unsure of what to do next. Should she get another glass? Probably not, as she was starting to feel the effects of everything she had been drinking over the past few hours. Should she leave the party? After all, it was her party, so she didn't want to just walk out. Glancing around the room, she realized she wouldn't be missed much since everyone was too busy socializing. Aside from that, the bar's Saturday night crowd was making its way in, and she was confident in her ability to escape without anyone batting an eye. And, with that in mind, she slipped out for some fresh air.

Diane took a short walk to the nearby convenience store and stood in front of the counter, staring at the cigarette display behind the clerk. "Do you need help with anything?" She pursed her lips, not sure where to start and not even knowing what compelled her to start smoking cigarettes tonight of all nights. "Uh," she murmured, trying to remember the brand that Milo's friends liked to smoke, "Can I get a pack of Reds?" The clerk nodded and, without saying anything else except to ask for her ID, she paid and walked out.

She sat outside the convenience store, realizing she had forgotten to buy a lighter, and decided to watch the bar across the street. People came in and out, whether it was to smoke, talk, or leave altogether. She then turned her attention to some voices that were louder than the rest. A lover's quarrel, perhaps? It was rude to stare, but she caught a glimpse of the girl. She thought she looked familiar, yet she couldn't put her finger on it. It wasn't until the girl gave up on the conversation and headed back inside that she saw who she was speaking to. Of all people, it had to be her ex-boyfriend Bentley. She could only make out bits and pieces of their conversation, but she could've sworn she heard him say he wasn't over her.

There was a 50/50 chance that Bentley had a lighter on him, so she did what any desperate girl would do and approached him to ask, "Do you have a lighter on you? Because it would be great if you did." She motioned to the pack of cigarettes in her hand, grabbing one for herself before offering it to him.

[c u p p ii e]

xx𝗯𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗹𝗲𝘆 𝗷𝗮𝗰𝗼𝗯 𝗵𝗮𝗹𝗲






𝗮𝗽𝗿𝗶𝗹 𝘁𝘄𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘆 𝗳𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁, 𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟖

He wasn’t sure where she had gotten one, but apparently there were many things he didn’t know about Diane these days, “You know, smoking’s bad for you,” And yet, he pulled out a cigarette for himself, brought it to his lips and quickly lit it before leaning in real close to Diane. Bentley brought the two tips of them together, covering them as he forced the other one to light, not managing to make eye contact once. As soon as the other one began to burn he pulled away and took a life depending drag, quickly blowing the smoke out over his shoulder, for once, not caring what Diane had thought of him, maybe he was healing after all.

The back and fourth stopped as soon as a car pulled up, rolling down their window, and leaning forward to ask if he was the one who called for him. “Yeah, that’s me,” immediately he dropped the cigarette, stepping on it, before he opened the door, suddenly hesitating to get in. Maybe it was the alcohol, but Bentley couldn’t help but take a deep breathe, look over at his shoulder and ask, “Come back to Aaron’s with me?” He ignored the impatience coming from the driver, closing the door just a tiny bit and turning towards Diane. “Don’t go back to him, at least for tonight,” they both knew who he was talking about and this was the second time he was asking, even though she ignored the first time, look where it had gotten them.

He felt the reluctance in her voice when she was responded, but simply opened the door wider for her to climb in when she agreed. The city fell silent around them as they drove past the lights and crowds, neither of them willing to say anything about what just happened not even a half hour ago. Bentley wasn’t sure what she had caught wind of, or where she had been at for the fight, or the kiss, or even the argument that followed, but he didn’t really care. All he cared about was that she finally agreed to walk away from Milo for a night, that she chose himself over Milo for the first time in forever, and that was enough for him.

The moment the driver arrived at Aaron’s, Bentley slid out of the car, not waiting for Diane as he walked up to the apartment complex. ”Last chance to change your mind,” honestly he wasn’t sure why he was asking, he had never been this careful with Eden. And yet, when Diane stopped in her tracks and asked about his brother he stopped too. “Good as always, and probably, it is his place,” Eleanor was probably there too but Diane didn’t ask that. But when Diane refused to move, Bentley moved without thinking, walking up to her, grabbing her chin to look up at him. “Come up stairs with me, get a good nights rest away from the house. That’s it, nothing else, you can walk away tomorrow,” and just like that he swiped his thumb over her cheek and grabbed her hand so he could lead her.

Bentley was deep in the thought, confused about the kiss, unsure how he had ended up here with Diane, practically over everything that happened tonight, causing the silence to take over as they weaved through all the homes. When they arrived at Aaron’s door he opened it up for them and nodded to the bed sectioned off in the living room. “I can sleep on the couch,” he said as he toed off his shoes and pulled his hoodie over his head. “I’m going to go change,” and just like that he disappeared but not without laying out one of his shirts for Diane as he had done time and time before when they together.

[eggawoo]

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xx𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐧𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐮　◞ 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐞𝐫 ｡
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"And yet he takes one," Diane murmured. Although she wasn't sure what she felt as Bentley leaned in close, it was oddly intimate for something so mundane. Diane allowed the feeling to pass, now carefully observing as Bentley took a drag of his cigarette before doing the same with her own. As it was her first time, she didn't know any better and inhaled too much of the smoke at once, causing her to have a coughing fit. Through the coughs, she heard him say something out of concern, so she waved a hand at him to let him know she was okay.

Now that she felt more comfortable after learning from her mistake, Diane continued to smoke her cigarette and watched a car pull up beside them. The nicotine, combined with the alcohol, made her head spin, but she was able to gather that Bentley had called an Uber to leave. She saw him reach for the door, patiently waiting for him to get in the car, but he said something that surprised her.

Diane's brows furrowed when he asked her to come with him to Aaron's place, and she opened her mouth to speak but struggled to find the words to answer him. There was something about him telling her not to go back to Milo that felt familiar, but she couldn't place it and tried to ignore it. "I'm not sure it's a good idea, but it's better than staying here," she finally responded. Maybe it was the liquor talking, but a small part of her did want to go home with him because it felt oddly satisfying to be the one he asked to go home with him. So, despite her hesitation, she crouched down to put out her cigarette against the pavement and got in the car.

As much as Diane wanted to, she couldn't find anything to say in her drunken state, so they rode in silence. She felt embarrassed as she followed him out of the car, wondering what the driver had thought about the two of them. It wasn't like she would ever see him again, but it did make her wonder if she made the right decision.

When the apartment complex came into view, Bentley told her it was her last chance to change her mind. Like a deer in headlights, Diane stopped walking as it finally occurred to her where they were, causing her to blurt out, "How's Aaron?" She then bit her lower lip, nervous as she asked her next question, "Is he home right now?" Unsatisfied with his answer, she turned to leave, except Bentley was in front of her before she could make another move and convinced her otherwise. He was so gentle with her, so how could she refuse his offer? And, with nothing to say in response, she nodded quietly and allowed herself to be led by him.

Despite Aaron moving out years ago, Diane had never been to his apartment until tonight, so she took everything in when she walked through the door. She looked at where Bentley nodded, following him to his "room" and listening as he announced that he would change elsewhere. It was strange to borrow his t-shirt as his ex-girlfriend, but it was better than anything she was currently wearing, which reeked of the bar. Of course, the t-shirt fit her like a dress, as his shirts always had when they were still dating. And, although it made her feel smaller than she already was, it also made her feel safe.

While waiting for Bentley to return, Diane sat at the edge of the bed, contemplating lying down when she saw how comfy the pillows and blankets looked. Her thoughts were interrupted when Bentley asked if she had changed, causing her to reply with a simple "Yeah." It wasn't like he hadn't seen her naked before, but she knew that he was being a gentleman like always. When he walked out of the hallway and into the living room, her eyes were immediately drawn to his arms. It had been a while since he wore anything that revealed them, and she couldn't help but stare. She wasn't sure when he got more tattoos, but, she had to admit, they suited him.

The silence was deafening after Bentley situated himself on the couch. Her mind searched for something to talk about. Anything would've been better than the silence. Admitting defeat, she crawled into bed and was prepared to say goodnight but paused for a few seconds before asking him, "Come to bed with me?"

Diane was relieved when Bentley crawled into bed next to her, but now she had a burning question troubling her. When he said goodnight, she said it back and turned away, weighing the pros and cons of her question. But she knew, despite the pros and cons, she would feel guilty if she didn't at least ask. It was only a few seconds before she turned to face him again, staring at him until she gathered the courage to ask, "Is that girl, er, Eden, your girlfriend? Because... I was wondering if this is okay?" She then motioned between them and added, "Sharing the bed, that is."

[c u p p ii e]

xx𝗯𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗹𝗲𝘆 𝗷𝗮𝗰𝗼𝗯 𝗵𝗮𝗹𝗲






𝗮𝗽𝗿𝗶𝗹 𝘁𝘄𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘆 𝗳𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁, 𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟖

Bentley proceeded to remind himself as he changed, this wasn’t about them it was about her, so after taking a little longer than necessary, he finally walked down the hall and whispered, “Did you change?” The shirt was simply an offer, but his heart began to thud loudly in his chest when she admitted that she had, and as soon as she did he walked around the corner and suddenly it felt like he couldn’t breathe. A wave of nostalgia crashed over him, early mornings, waking up beside her always in his clothes and sometimes none at all. Bentley could feel himself starting to stare, so instead of saying anything else at all he crossed the room and crawled onto the couch without another word.

A moment of silence passed, “I'm not sure that's a good idea,” he repeated her words back to her, and yet he found himself crossing the room and crawling into bed beside her. Immediately he was on his back again, as he was over on the couch, starring up at the ceiling when Diane flipped over, his head lulling to the side when she did, curious. The question shouldn’t have annoyed him as much as it did, and yet, he couldn’t help but sigh and look away from her, he knew this wasn't a good idea. “No, she’s just a friend,” he started as he began to think about what happened at the bar again, about how everything had gotten so messy between them, “Cherise’s friend,” and that was all he had left it at, a new uncomfortable silence settling between them, Bentley didn’t want to talk about Eden.

Bentley figured that would be it, they would fall asleep, or rather Diane would since his brain was far too busy, they would wake up tomorrow, and go their separate ways again, their last conversation being about Eden of all things, and yet her touch startled him out of his messy thoughts. Her fingertips, brushing over the wording, “It is what it is,” formed in the shape of a smiley face, his eyes slow to follow, it now dawning on him that Diane had yet to see his new tattoos due to the cold weather since getting them back in December.

There was hesitation, Bentley refusing to make eye contact, trying to gather his thoughts before he spoke, asking himself how vulnerable he wanted to be with her, “Ever since the overdose—,” he started slowly, the topic had never actually been brought up between them, only shared between himself and Aaron, the word overdose never being used once before, it was uncomfortable to say the least. “I felt really shitty, unwanted, worthless, thinking about how even my parents didn’t want me,” but there was something, something about the way they laid side by side like this, they way she looked at him with those gentle green eyes.

“But then I thought about all the things that happened because of it.” A small sigh escaped his lips as he finally looked up at her, “Aaron wouldn’t have survived in that house, neither would have I, and then—,” immediately he rolled onto his side, now facing her and exposing his other arm that had a set of flowers and the words, “Watch me while I bloom,” on his forearm. “Then I met you, and without you I would never have had Scout.” there was another fit of hesitation as he lifted his hand and placed it on her cheek, thumb swiping over it before tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “And suddenly I had a purpose again,” another sigh, another stretch of silence, before he turned his head and rolled onto his back again, “You should really get some sleep,” suddenly Bentley was feeling too much.

[eggawoo]

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xx𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐧𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐮　◞ 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐞𝐫 ｡
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Although she felt silly asking him the question in the first place, Diane was relieved to hear his answer, but would he have shared the bed with her otherwise? She scrunched her nose at the mention of her cousin, as it answered one question yet failed to assure the many others that swarmed her mind: 'Where did he meet Eden? Was it at a party? Did Cherise introduce them to each other, and how long has she been hanging out with him behind my back?' Instead of bombarding him with these questions, she softly murmured, "Oh," and allowed the silence to fill the space between them once more.

Her insecurities made her heart ache for further reassurance, except there was that damned silence between them again, causing her to sigh through her nose. She wanted to talk, to say something, to say anything, but it had been so long since they were last like this that it almost felt unnatural. So, instead of forcing conversation about trivial matters, her eyes studied Bentley's face before falling onto the tattoos on his arm. Despite seeing them briefly earlier, she was still curious about them, thus giving her the perfect reason to speak again, even if it seemed like he didn't want to, "What do your tattoos mean?" She listened as he collected his thoughts and spoke, recalling that particular day and how it affected everyone, except she never knew how it had affected him directly.

Diane hadn't noticed that she was holding her breath the entire time he spoke. It was almost as if this moment would disappear if she made so much as a sound, but she soon found her breath again as he talked to her about what gave him purpose. Her eyes softened, and she relaxed enough to let him touch her cheek before he tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. Initially, when he crawled into bed next to her, he was unrecognizable, even distant, despite his close proximity. But right now? He was that boy she fell in love with all those years ago.

Unfortunately, her feelings of nostalgia were short-lived, as he rolled onto his back and suggested that she should get some sleep. She huffed and laid on her back to stare at the ceiling, but she wasn't ready to sleep just yet. "It's crazy to think that you and I wouldn't have been friends or even met... if my mom hadn't been sick," she said, unsure if he was still awake. Regardless of whether or not he was listening, she continued, "You met her a few times when she dropped me off on her good days. I wish you got to know her like I did, and I know I don't talk about her as much as I should, but it's not a secret that she meant everything to me."

She rubbed her eyes because she was beginning to feel tired, but she had been unaware of the tears that rolled down her cheek. After wiping away the tears with her hands and taking a deep breath to regain her composure, she finished what she wanted to say, "Even if she's not here anymore, my mom would've wanted me to live the life she couldn't have. And, even though my life isn't what I ever imagined it to be, at least I have Scout, and I never want her to go through what I had to." Toward the end of the one-sided converastion, she had already closed her eyes and trailed off. She heard what Bentley said to her; whatever it was, it caused her to sleepily look at him and smile before finally falling asleep.

[c u p p ii e]

xx𝗯𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗹𝗲𝘆 𝗷𝗮𝗰𝗼𝗯 𝗵𝗮𝗹𝗲






𝗮𝗽𝗿𝗶𝗹 𝘁𝘄𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘆 𝗳𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁, 𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟖

He spoke into the darkness, nothing but the moon seeping in through the windows to cast light. “She won’t, she’ll always have the both of us,” Bentley immediately reassured her without thought. No matter how rocky of start he had at the beginning, no matter what happened between him and Diane, he’d never leave Scout again. He was so serious when he said that Scout was his purpose, because without her he probably would have given up a long time ago.

“Your mom loved you," so much so that he had spent a lot of time wishing, every time Isabella was around, that his parents had ever looked at him the way she did Diane. “She left so suddenly, but I know she did, and that will never be your fault or burden or even Scouts for that matter,” it was the same way that they both looked at Scout. The way Bentley looked at Diane too, but she probably didn’t need him telling her that, she knew, she had too. So he repeated, “I just know she did,” challenging the thought that she would ever doubt their affection for her.

Bentley almost missed the way Diane had stopped speaking or the fact that she had closed her eyes and began to drift off, too consumed by his own thoughts. He could only smile at tehe notion, as he turned his head back over to look at her. The fact that she was finally at ease, and asleep by his side pulled a deep need inside of him. In his heart, in his stomach, every inch of his body, and yet Bentley refrained. instead he simply whispered, even quieter than before, “Happy Birthday, Diane, I love you, ” sure she had to be long gone with the slow rise and fall of her chest, before voicing his feelings, “Goodnight,” and then there was silence.


𝗮𝗽𝗿𝗶𝗹 𝘁𝘄𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘆 𝘀𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗱, 𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟖

Bentley would be lying if he said he had slept much the night before, spending most of his time starring at Diane as if he blinked she would just up and disappear. The only break being when he snuck out to the balcony to smoke another cigarette in the middle of the night, poetry journal in hand, but hardly got any writing done because even then he kept glancing inside over his shoulder. He kept thinking about the events that occurred tonight, he could only blame his loose tongue on the alcohol now that the fresh air from outside was finally beginning to sober him up, pulling him enough to his senses, demanding that he give himself some rest.

So when he finally passed out due to exhaustion, at an ungodly hour, he wasn’t too happy with the jostling he felt on his shoulder, a short groan escaping from his lips as he began to open his eyes. Bentley couldn’t see Aaron, his vision still focusing, but he could feel the tension in his voice. “What?” A part of him was confused, last night felt like a dream, but when he looked next to him and saw Diane resting beside him, he couldn’t help but smile at her, forgetting for a quick moment that Aaron was still standing over him.

Bentley frowned, looking back at Aaron before he kicked the blankets off himself and got up, walking towards the kitchen with his brother on his heel. The last thing he wanted was disturb her, the thought of her leaving upset him more than it should have. “She was having issues with Milo. Nothing happened,” except that he had gotten in a fight, kissed Eden, and then begged Diane to come back here with him, but again, Aaron hadn’t asked all of that. “I’ll walk her home or call for a ride when she wakes up,” It took everything in Bentley not to yell at Aaron due to his response, his fingers gripping the counter much stronger than he had meant too. And just like clock work, Eleanor came walking out of Aaron’s room, already dressed, he could only assume that Aaron had asked her before he had even woken him up or talked to him which upset him even more.

[eggawoo]

　　　　　　　✧　D I A N E　M O R E A U　!

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LOCATION　aaron's apt　⇨　car　━━━　　　COMPANY　no one　⇨　eleanor　━━━


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Diane woke up to voices coming from somewhere in the apartment, faint but distinct. Rubbing her eyes, she blinked against the morning light and sat up in bed, gripping her head as a wave of pain from her hangover throbbed against her palm. "Ow," she muttered, her voice hoarse from her dry throat. She was parched, craving a glass of cold water after last night's celebrations. But as she squinted at her surroundings, she realized this wasn't her home—or even her boyfriend's bed. The last thing she remembered was leaving the bar with Bentley and vaguely talking after they arrived, but now everything felt disorienting and unclear.

The distant voices echoed from the kitchen, barely audible, yet she sensed they were about her, especially since Bentley was nowhere to be seen. With a sigh, she slipped out onto the nearby balcony, hoping to escape the conversation that wasn't meant for her ears. She winced, suddenly aware that in her haste, she had forgotten to grab her jeans, still crumpled on the floor next to Bentley's bed.

Dropping into a chair, she placed her hands between her thighs, trying to warm herself against the chill in the air. It was still early morning; the sun peeked hesitantly over the buildings. Nervously biting her lip, she drummed her fingers on the table, uncertain when it would be safe to go back inside. Her gaze wandered the balcony until it landed on a book sitting on the table. Curious, she leaned forward and snuck a peek at a random page, initially thinking it was just a regular book.

As she read the intimate scrawl, she found herself unable to stop, her heart racing as she absorbed Bentley's thoughts and feelings. A twinge of guilt washed over her; it felt wrong to invade his privacy. Panic surged through her when she heard the sliding door open. Just as Eleanor peeked out, Diane quickly slid the journal under her thigh, hoping her reaction had gone unnoticed.

Eleanor stepped out onto the balcony, her expression soft with concern as she approached Diane. There was a gentle, almost apologetic look in her eyes, as if she could sense Diane's unease. Diane, still rattled from the journal she'd just hidden, straightened up in her chair, feeling her face flush with embarrassment. She couldn't meet Eleanor's gaze; the shame of everything—from coming over without Aaron knowing and sharing a bed with Bentley—weighed heavily on her.

Trying to mask the knot of anxiety twisting in her stomach, Diane nodded when Eleanor asked if she was ok. As Eleanor spoke again, Diane's hand slid under her thigh, grabbing the journal and hiding it behind her back as she stood up to move inside.

"Yeah," Diane mumbled, her voice shakier than she intended. "I just need to grab my things." She glanced nervously toward the door, feeling the journal pressing against her back. She hadn't meant to take it with her, but in her panic—and with her hangover clouding her thoughts—she couldn't think straight. With a forced smile, she moved toward the door, desperate to escape both the situation and the guilt gnawing at her.

Diane's heart raced as she hurriedly gathered her belongings, stuffing Bentley's journal into her bag without thinking. In her frantic rush, she quickly pulled on her jeans but didn't even bother changing out of Bentley's t-shirt. The more time she spent in the apartment, the heavier the weight of her panic felt, coiling tighter in her chest. She could practically hear Aaron's voice in her head, scolding her for not being more responsible, for getting herself into this situation. The thought of facing him filled her with dread.

She tossed in her clothes, half-folded and crumpled from the night before, and rummaged through her pockets for her phone. Where was it? The longer she lingered, the more frantic she became. She could see Bentley and Aaron still talking in the kitchen, their voices drifting into the living room. She tried to block out whatever they were saying, her mind racing with "what-ifs." What if Milo found out? What if he asked about Bentley? The idea of having to explain everything made her stomach churn.

Finally, she spotted her phone on the side table, the screen lighting up with more than a healthy amount of missed notifications. She snatched it up from the charger, feeling a rush of relief, but it was quickly turned into wariness as she looked over the messages from Milo. There was no time to think about them now; she needed to hurry—she didn't want Eleanor to think she was taking too long.

With one last sweep of the room, she checked to make sure she hadn't left anything behind. She couldn't let this turn into a disaster. She just had to get out and into the car before the weight of the morning's events could catch up with her.

Once she was sure she had everything, Diane bolted to the front door, heart pounding as she opened it and stepped into the hallway. Eleanor was waiting, her expression a mix of concern and understanding. Without a word, they hurried down the stairs and out to the car, relief washing over Diane as she sank into the passenger seat, grateful to be leaving the chaos behind.

As the car pulled away from the apartment complex, Diane glanced out the window, the morning sun casting shadows across the dashboard. She took a deep breath. "Eleanor," she started, her voice a bit shaky, "I just need you to know... nothing happened between me and Bentley last night." Turning to face her, a mix of panic and determination shone in her eyes. "I wanted to leave the bar, but Bentley didn't want me to go home, so he offered me a ride with him. We just talked and fell asleep, I swear. It was all innocent." The words tumbled out as if saying them aloud could somehow ease the tension coiling in her chest.


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THOUGHTS　'i'm never going to hear the end of it'　━━━

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[c u p p ii e]

xxxxx




APRIL TWENTY-SECOND， ２０１８

Everything was starting to look up since the book launch, or at least as well as it could go given the circumstances. At some point in the night he had managed to get Eleanor’s father alone and popped the question, explaining to Mr. Kennedy that he couldn’t promise her the world and it’d be slow to come but he was absolutely sure that no one would love Eleanor more than he did. The hard part was over, because now he just had to actually propose, which, he wasn’t nervous about at all. Everything was so easy with her, it always had been, and when ever he was able to get the chance he was going to ask her in a way that he knew they’d both appreciate.

When it came to Bentley, things were getting better there too. He wasn’t going out as often, coming home at a decent hour, sometimes even before him and Eleanor had gotten home from date night. It was a breathe of fresh air, two months running, until Diane’s birthday had finally rolled around. A large part of him anticipated this, coming home in the evening to not find Bentley hanging out on the couch as he had been when he had left him. What he hadn’t anticipated was waking up the following morning and seeing Diane in bed beside him.

Aaron had been very vocal about it, as much as he loved Diane he didn’t think that she was right for his brother. Every time she made her way back into Bentley’s life Bentley would eventually begin to spiral, and to be honest, Aaron’s heart couldn’t handle if it happened again. So when he woke up in the morning to make himself coffee, only to see the two of them sleeping side by side, albeit not curled up next to one another, Aaron took one look and turned around going straight back into his room. “Eleanor, Honey,” he called for her softly even with the unsettling feeling lingering in his stomach. “Diane spent the night, I don’t know why, but I need you to take her home, please?” if he tried to talk to Bentley while she was still there, either of them, Eleanor or Diane, he knew how badly it might end being that the previous heated discussion ended poorly.

As quietly as possible he walked over to Bentley’s side of the bed and gently shook his shoulder, hoping not to wake Diane before Eleanor could get dressed and make her way out of his room. “Care to explain?” he could feel his patience dissolving, his reactions becoming snappier due to Bentley’s nonchalant response and his instant need to flee to the kitchen. Of course Aaron followed, this conversation certainly wasn’t over. “Diane, Bentley, what is she doing here?” Out of everything his little brother could have said, having Milo be apart of the problem, was nothing short of an even larger irritation. “No, you’re going to stay here, Eleanor will drive her home.” and just like that he had cut him off just as Eleanor had come out of his room fully dressed and ready for the day.


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The car ride was quiet, Eleanor not wanting to step on any one’s toes, no matter how welcoming Aaron’s family had been towards her. At this point, Diane was like the little sister she had never had, an only child to a mom and dad who doted on her endlessly, so all of this was far out of her depth, and yet, when Diane finally brought up her worries she didn’t hesitate to reassure her. “Diane, you don’t have to explain anything to me,” as she spoke she looked over and offered her a smile briefly. “I believe you, and I’m sure Bentley had good intentions,” as much as Aaron didn’t appreciate Diane and Bentley being together, Eleanor understood that they needed one another wether it was platonic or romantic, in one way or another they were soulmates, just like she knew Aaron was hers.

“Call me if you need anything, okay?” there was no thought before she leaned over the center console and hugged Diane when they arrived back at the house. It seemed that Diane had a lot on her mind, it was that way with Bentley too, and yet that was the end of their car ride conversation. Eleanor was ready to drop her off, get back to Aaron so she could make sure he was handling things okay, but driving up and seeing Milo waiting on the porch for her, the way he was, had her stalling. It took all of Diane under a minute for her to hop out, and reach Milo’s side before Eleanor was hopping out herself.

“Hey, Milo, everything alright?” even though he reassured her his body language had read otherwise, “Perfect, glad to hear. I’m just going to walk Diane up then.” Instead of letting Milo respond, she wrapped her arm around her shoulder and guided her away. There was something about the way Diane had said “Bentley didn’t want me to go home,” had Eleanor reassessing the situation and leading her inside up the stairs. The moment they were out of earshot she looked over at her and whispered, “Diane, I need you to be honest. Does he always speak to you that way?” the arm around her shoulder squeezing just a tiny bit tighter.

[eggawoo]

　　　　　　　✧　D I A N E　M O R E A U　!

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LOCATION　car　⇨　home　━━━　　　COMPANY　eleanor　━━━


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Diane sat in the passenger seat, staring out the window as the car drove along the familiar streets. The conversation between her and Eleanor faded away, leaving only the gentle hum of the engine. Yet, the worries lingered—a dull ache in her chest. Suddenly, her phone buzzed in her pocket. She fished it out, squinting against the glare of the morning sun filtering through the car windows. It was a text from Milo asking when she'd be home. She sighed, fingers hovering over the screen as she typed back:


　
omw! eta 10 min.


The moment she hit send, a wave of dread washed over her. She scrolled through the rest of Milo's messages from last night and this morning, her heart sinking with each word. His tone shifted from worry to frustration, and the anger in his texts was palpable, underscored by the hypocrisy of his own silence in the past. Her head throbbed painfully, a hangover that felt like a freight train rumbled in her skull, mixing with the anxiety that settled in her chest like a stone.

As Eleanor pulled into the driveway, Diane caught sight of Milo leaning against the porch railing, arms crossed and expression unreadable. His posture was casual, but there was an intensity in the way he stood that sent her heart racing. A chill crawled down her spine. Momentarily frozen, she stared at him through the windshield, their relationship suddenly feeling more suffocating than she had remembered, the surface harmony masking a deeper tension.

"Call me if you need anything, okay?" Eleanor's voice broke through Diane's thoughts, offering a warmth that cut through the weight of the day. "Thanks, I will," Diane replied, her voice softer than she intended. It meant a lot to have someone looking out for her, even if she wasn't sure she deserved it. As Eleanor pulled away, Diane forced a smile, grateful for the fleeting moment of connection before facing what lay ahead.

With a deep breath, she opened the car door, her hand lingering on the handle as her mind screamed at her to turn back. Just get out of here. Go anywhere but here. She could still taste the remnants of last night's poor decisions, and the last thing she wanted to do was face Milo in this state. 'What do I even say?' The thought fluttered through her mind, accompanied by a flicker of guilt. She had been avoiding this conversation for too long, and now it loomed large and inescapable.

"Just breathe," she muttered to herself, forcing her hand away from the door handle. The moment felt monumental, heavy with unspoken words and unresolved feelings. Clenching her jaw, she stepped out of the car, bracing herself for whatever lay ahead.

Standing on the porch, her heart raced as she gathered herself before facing Milo. The air felt heavy with tension, a conflict simmering just below the surface. As she braced herself, she heard the sound of Eleanor's car door closing behind her, and then Milo's voice sliced through the quiet. "Nice shirt, Diane. Didn't think you'd come home in one of Bentley's t-shirts after last night," he said, his words laced with accusation. Diane's cheeks flushed, the realization dawning that she hadn't changed her shirt, and it looked bad—especially after their fight about Bentley at the bar.

Before she could respond, Eleanor approached them, her presence a comforting anchor in the whirlwind of emotions that threatened to overwhelm Diane. She felt a surge of gratitude for Eleanor's unwavering support, a lifeline amidst the chaos, but it was quickly followed by another flicker of guilt. She couldn't shake the sense that she had just given Milo more ammunition to feed his suspicions.

The warmth of Eleanor's arm around her shoulder offered solace. As they moved out of earshot, the older woman's protective embrace tightened, drawing Diane's attention to the worry etched in her eyes, a silent acknowledgement of the storm that lay ahead between her and Milo.

A lump formed in Diane's throat. She had always tried to brush off Milo's controlling tendencies as concern, but now, faced with the weight of Eleanor's unspoken words, she couldn't deny the truth. "Sometimes," she whispered, recalling the moments when Milo's words felt more like accusations than genuine concern. The heaviness in her chest felt like a stone, and she couldn't shake the feeling that she was standing on the edge of something she wasn't ready to confront.

Diane guided Eleanor upstairs, her hand brushing against the familiar banister as they moved through the quiet house. Each step felt heavy, the earlier confrontation with Milo still weighing on her. She needed a moment away from the tension, away from the suffocating presence of the guy who showcases their 'perfect' relationship to the world, even as everything was falling apart behind closed doors.

She led Eleanor to her room and shut the door behind them. For a moment, Diane let out a shaky breath, allowing herself to take in the silence, the sense of control washing over her. She pulled herself together, the familiar space of her room providing a semblance of comfort.

Eleanor settled onto the edge of her bed, her presence steady and grounding. Diane hadn't expected to find this comfort in her, especially without Aaron around. But here she was, leaning on Eleanor in a way that felt both necessary and unfamiliar. Still, she felt a pang of guilt at the thought of hiding certain truths, but some things were too complicated to share. She couldn't bring herself to confess everything, not yet.

"I didn't think he'd go that far," Diane said, her voice quieter than usual. She stared at her hands, unsure of where to begin. "Milo's comment about the shirt... it felt more than just a dig. It's just... he doesn't trust me. And that's been building for a while."

She paused, the thought heavy in her chest. How could she explain this, without revealing just how tangled her feelings were? Without acknowledging the part of her that longed for the familiar comfort Bentley provided—comfort she never found with Milo. She couldn't tell Eleanor that, not yet. She had to keep some of it locked away.

"Milo and I had a fight last night," Diane started, frustration sharpening her words. "He thought I'd invited Bentley to my birthday party—the surprise party that I didn't even know about! I didn't know Bentley was even there until Milo threw it in my face. And then, this morning, when he saw me coming up to the house, all he seemed to care about was who I was with and the damn t-shirt I was wearing." She clenched her fists, feeling the sting of Milo's accusations again. "Bentley must've overheard us arguing. I didn't want to stay, but I had nowhere else to go, and I was drunk, miserable—on my own birthday, of all things. When we finally got to the apartment, Bentley offered me an old shirt to change into because I reeked of the bar—still do, honestly. But to Milo, that shirt meant I was lying. That I was hiding something with Bentley."

Diane's gaze drifted to the window, watching the early morning mist rise over the meadow, the distant trees fading into the soft light. She could feel the sting of the unspoken truth—the one she wasn't ready to tell Eleanor. That there was something between her and Bentley, but admitting that felt like a betrayal of a part of herself she wasn't ready to confront.

"I don't know what Milo thinks anymore," she murmured, bitterness creeping into her tone. "But I can't keep pretending everything's fine, either. It's like... he sees something that's not there. And it makes me wonder if he even knows me at all."

Diane sank onto the bed beside Eleanor, her gaze fixed on the floor. She rubbed her temples, trying to push away the headache threatening to come on. "We're always posting pictures, making everything look so perfect online. I think... he thinks that if we don't show that, people will see something's wrong. But I never wanted that—never wanted to be someone's idea of perfection. I just wanted something real. Something quiet. Like what I had with Bentley. And now... it feels like I'm pretending with Milo. Pretending I don't feel the way I do."

The truth felt too big, too heavy to carry alone. But she couldn't share it all yet, not when everything was still raw, when she wasn't even sure of what she was feeling herself. All she knew was that she didn't want to lose the sense of safety Eleanor provided—the same safety she had always given to the kids she cared for. But deep down, Diane knew she couldn't protect herself from everything anymore. Not anymore.


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THOUGHTS　'i thought i'd have it all figured out by now, but i feel more lost than ever'　━━━

_______________________________
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[c u p p ii e]

xxxxx




APRIL TWENTY-SECOND， ２０１８

The moment her suspicions were confirmed she couldn’t’t help but frown, she knew there was something she didn’t like about Milo and now she had good reason and an even bigger reason to stay here with Diane for a bit longer, Aaron would understand. So Eleanor sat there, patiently, on the edge of Diane’s bed as she unloaded her feelings about everything that had been going on between her an Milo or at least how much she was willing to share. Instead of saying anything right away, she paused, looking at it from both sides, all sides actually, being that she’s been the outside point of view for far too long.

“Diane, you know the best thing about being with Aaron is?” she asked softly, tucking her long red hair behind her ear, a fond look twinkling in her eye at the mention of her significant other. “There’s never been any guess work between us or the need to be something that we weren’t” it had always been so easy between them even with the odd fight here and there. “I love Aaron for exactly who he is and he loves me all the same, and I’d like to think that’s what love is really supposed to be,” Eleanor slowly got to her feet and walked over to Diane, grabbing her shoulders as she did. “If you know what it’s like having that, even if it was with someone else, then don’t ever think you’re crazy for wanting it again,” and just like that she squeezed Diane’s shoulders and pulled her in for another hug.

“It was so early when we ran out of the house, I could definitely use some coffee?” was the question she asked the moment the conversation came to a lull. A part of Eleanor knew that Diane needed a little more time, but she'd never ask for it. And a bigger part didn’t want to leave her there with Milo but she didn’t have a choice, so stalling would be her best bet. And once they had a coffee and chatted for a few more hours, more so about their personal lives, things that Eleanor wouldn’t mind Milo overhearing, she finally left but not without reminding Diane that she was only ever a phone call away.

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MAY THIRTEENTH， ２０１８

“Aaron, Honey, I need you to listen to me. Milo, he’s manipulating Diane and it’s not healthy. I know you don’t want to get involved but as someone who’s like an older brother, please I think you should say something?” Aaron slowly blinked at her, trying to process what she was saying after the commotion that happened as soon as she left with Diane.“I will, let me just—,” a pause, he already had so much on his plate with Bentley. After their argument his brother had stormed out of the room and had left him alone with his thoughts, and now this. “I’ll talk to her the next time I see her,” and yet— he never did.

The next time they had gone over to see Diane was nearly a month later and on Mothers Day. The four of them, himself, Eleanor, Diane and Scout, had met at the park they used to frequent as children and surprised her with a picnic to which Eleanor had spent hours fussing over the night before. There had been multiple chances to talk to her, multiple times he could have brought it up but Aaron didn’t want to sour the mood, especially with what he had set out to do today. In his jacket pocket burning a hole, sat a letter from her mother. Something he was supposed to have given her on her eighteenth birthday, but given the circumstances, Scout’s being conceived, Bentley being hospitalized and whole other list of things, man had it been a long two years, the timing never seemed right until now.

“Diane, it’s sunset, we go see Isabella before the day is gone,” the irony was not lost upon him. Aaron was always the one telling her that there was always a tomorrow, ever since her mom had passed away, and now today was no different. So as soon as she agreed, he piled the four of them into Eleanor’s car and drove the short distance to the cemetery. “I’ll grab Scout, you go ahead, we’ll meet you up there,” He’d like to believe that he was giving Diane a moment to herself, which he was, but he also knew that he was buying himself more time, Eleanor could see it too. “Honey, I’ve got her, you two go ahead,” and with a knowing look from his unknowing future wife all he could do was nod his head and catch up Diane.

[eggawoo]

　　　　　　　✧　D I A N E　M O R E A U　!

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LOCATION　her mother's grave　━━━　　　COMPANY　aaron　━━━


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Diane sat by the window, the soft glow of the morning sun spilling over the edge of the meadow. It had been three weeks since she'd last spoken to Eleanor, but the memory of their conversation lingered, heavy and unresolved. Eleanor's words kept playing in her mind: "Don't ever think you're crazy for wanting it again."

She couldn't shake the feeling that she was still trapped in the middle—between the life she thought she wanted and the life she was beginning to realize she might deserve. Between Milo's expectations and the quiet, undeniable pull toward something else, something she couldn't name.

Diane smiled faintly as she thought about the plans for later that day. Eleanor had called earlier, confirming they were still on for Mother's Day. Diane had agreed, though the thought of spending the day with Eleanor, Aaron, and Scout did little to calm the nagging feeling in her chest. It had been Aaron's idea to make the day special—to take her to the park they used to frequent as kids and have a picnic with Scout and Eleanor.

He'd mentioned feeling guilty for missing her birthday this year and wanted to make it up to her. The plan was to visit her mother's grave afterward—something Diane usually did on her birthday, but had missed due to the surprise party. While it was tradition for her to go in the morning, Aaron suggested they visit at sunset. Sunsets had always been something special between the two of them, and she couldn't help but wonder why he seemed so eager to make the day feel right again. Still, something about breaking her usual routine felt off, as if the shift was a subtle sign that today would be different.



━━━　　T　I　M　E　　S　K　I　P　　━━━



Later that day, as they drove toward the park, Diane felt a weight in her chest, the unease growing as the evening approached. The park, peaceful and familiar, didn't bring the comfort she'd hoped for. As they set up the picnic, she found herself waiting for something—though she wasn't sure what. She glanced at Aaron and Eleanor, a quiet knot in her stomach growing. Something told her that today might be more than just memories.



━━━　　T　I　M　E　　S　K　I　P　　━━━



The park had been peaceful, the picnic a quiet reminder of simpler times, but now, standing before her mother's grave, Diane felt the weight of everything in the air. She had arrived first, needing solitude, and Aaron and Eleanor had offered to take Scout for a little while so Diane could have her moment. The small bouquet of flowers that had accompanied her all day now lay gently on the stone marker as she crouched beside it, her fingers brushing the petals before settling in place.

"Happy Mother's Day, Maman," Diane said softly, her voice catching slightly. "It's been a while, hasn't it?" She paused, looking down at the grave, her thoughts racing as she tried to put into words the year that had passed since her last visit. The silence seemed to stretch, amplifying the weight of all the things left unsaid.

"Your granddaughter's getting bigger. I can't believe she's almost three years old in two months. And guess what? Her terrible twos weren't so terrible!" Diane smiled faintly, the memory of Scout's mischievous grin flashing in her mind, the joy of those small moments tugging at her heart. It was strange to think about how much time had passed, how the little girl she had once held so closely had grown into someone full of surprises.

"And I've been seeing someone new too... it's been about a year now, but I just don't think he's right for me." She let out a slow breath, feeling a quiet ache inside, the words carrying the weight of a decision she'd been avoiding. The shift in her life had been subtle, but undeniable. The words felt almost too small to encompass it all, but they were the only ones she could offer for now, wrapped in the simplicity of the moment.

After a long pause, Diane whispered, her voice barely more than a breath, "Please forgive me for being so late this year... I promise I won't be late next time." Her eyes fluttered shut for a brief moment, the weight of her promise hanging heavy in stillness around her.

Diane stayed crouched for a moment longer, her fingers still brushing against the cool stone of the grave. The silence hung between her and the world around her, thick and heavy with the unspoken. The faint rustle of wind through the trees was a distant remminder of the world outside, but here, it felt as though time had slowed to a crawl. Then, she heard the soft rustle of footsteps approaching, and she looked up to see Aaron standing nearby, his eyes fixed on the gravestone, his expression unreadable.

She stepped back slightly, giving him space, and nodded toward the grave. "You can pay your respects too." Her voice was steady, but the quiet offer was wrapped in a gentle vulnerability that she hadn't intended to show.

Diane watched him for a moment, remembering the times her mother had spoken fondly of him. It was a part of her memories that always stood out—those few conversations when Aaron was a boy, when her mother had treated him with the gentle warmth she'd shown everyone. Isabella had alaways been a beacon of kindness, a woman who would have taken over the orphanage if she hadn't passed away so early. But there had always been something about Aaron that seemed to bring out an extra softness in her, a quiet affection that Diane now understood.

The silence stretched between them, uncomfortable in its stillness. Diane could feel the weight of something unsaid hanging in the air. Aaron shifted slightly, as if he wanted to speak but couldn't find the right words. The space between themm felt heavy, filled wiith unspoken things neither of them knew how to address. Finally, unable to bear the tension any longer, Diane broke the silence. She cleared her throat, her voice soft but steady as she asked, "Where are Eleanor and Scout? Did they go for a walk or something?" Her question was an attempt to fill the quiet with something simple, something that didn't require explanations or words left unspoken.


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THOUGHTS　'just spit it out'　━━━

_______________________________
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[c u p p ii e]

xxxxx




MAY THIRTEENTH， ２０１８

Aaron would be lying if he said that he hadn’t walked at a snails pace up the hill and to where Diane was standing. Even with giving both himself and Diane extra time, by walking around and kissing Eleanor and unbuckling Scout before he walked up, he still managed to catch the end of Diane’s sentiments towards her mother. Aaron definitely didn’t know what it was like to have a mom who cared so much, or could even understand the feeling of missing a parent the way Diane did because truth be told when he thought about James and Riley Hale there was nothing to be felt except misplaced memories.

Instead of interrupting he walked up behind her with his hands in his pockets, waiting until Diane had called him over. When she did he walked up and crouched down next to he plaque, pulling out a few stray weeds that had grown around it as an excuse to gather his thoughts. “Hi, Isabella, happy mothers day,” he started before he crossed his arms over his knees and then looked over his shoulder up at Diane. “Happy mothers day to you and your daughter actually,” the words came out with a smile before turning his head forward again. “We miss you, out of everyone you were the closest thing this house had to a mother figure,” Aaron hardly ever came to visit Isabella, maybe once a year, if that, but there was no denying the connection the two of them had. Aaron felt that deeply in the way she looked and talked to him even with their interactions being far less than her’s and Bentley’s.

There was a moment he paused, closing his eyes, and then taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry it took so long, Diane has grown so much and so have I and all the rest of the kids, Even with Diane behind him he couldn’t be sure what he was apologizing for exactly, not giving her the letter, not being able to take care of Diane or Bentley or anyone else for that matter as if she had ever asked him to do that. “There was just never a right time, or I guess there was but I don’t know, I’m just sorry,” the thought weighed heavy on his chest, even more so over the last two years with all the chaos that had occurred, leaving him silent, the only noise between the three of them being the wind brushing through the nearby trees.

The silence stretched on and on, Aaron looking for the nerve or courage to finally do what he had set out to today, Diane suddenly forcing his hand when she had asked about Scout and Eleanor. “Diane, I—,” it wasn’t like him to be nervous, Aaron suddenly got to his feet and faced her. “This is yours,” he simply spit out. Slowly he opened up his denim jacket, peeling back the flannel below that so he could reach into his inner pocket. Out came a discolored envelope, years of being tucked away from place to to place in Aaron’s possession, the only person to know about the letter besides Diane’s grandmother and more recently Eleanor. Leading up to this very moment he couldn't help but think about how he had been carrying it around for four almost five years, and Diane's grandmother long before that. It was now almost sixteen years since Isabella had written this out, and he was finally here to deliver on that unspoken promise.

“Isabella wanted me to give this to you on your eighteenth birthday,” Aaron would never understand why Isabella chose him of all people to handle such a delicate situation, but some how she knew, she knew the impact and red string that the four of them, Diane, Cherise, Bentley, and Aaron would always hold between them far beyond what Aaron himself could have ever imagined at the young age of nine. “I know you’re twenty one now, but there was so much happening in those between years that there just never seemed like a good time, ” reiterating what he had just told her mother because truly he believed that he was protecting their entire family by waiting until today to give her the letter. “She loved you, Diane, and I do too. We all do,” Aaron placed his hands inside of his pockets and nodded again, “If you need a second I can find Eleanor and Scout,” the sun was now almost gone, the darkness starting to creep around them which mean’t the cemetery had to be closing fairly soon.

[eggawoo]

　　　　　　　✧　D I A N E　M O R E A U　!

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LOCATION　her mother's grave　━━━　　　COMPANY　aaron　━━━


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Diane felt a rush of emotions flood her as Aaron explained, his voice careful, gentle, but holding a weight she'd rarely heard from him. This letter had been meant for her at eighteen, meant to fill some quiet, empty part of her on the cusp of adulthood. Yet it had waited—because of him, because he thought it was best, because he wanted to protect her in ways he probably couldn't even name.

She didn't know if she could appreciate that now or if she could ever forgive it, this decision he'd made on her behalf, something her family trusted him with that he'd kept hidden for years. She looked at him, a familiar figure against the backdrop of the fading light, and for a moment, she felt a surge of resentment mixed with the fierce, aching gratitude that kept her rooted, still reaching for the one piece of her mother left to her.

Diane's hands trembled as she accepted the letter. "No, stay here," she murmured, barely looking up as she clutched it in her hands. The words slipped out before she could catch them, revealing her own confusion at needing his presence when she wasn't sure if she could even forgive him.

The envelope was weathered, soft at the edges from years of being handled, carried, and kept away. She looked down at it, her chest tight, wondering how it had taken this long to reach her, how Aaron had carried it for so long. Her fingers traced her mother's neat, careful handwriting on the front, and it was as though the ground slipped out from under her.

She took a shaky breath, feeling her heart pounding as she finally broke the seal. Her mind raced with questions, fears, a twisted, desperate hope that whatever she found inside would ease some part of the ache she'd carried all these years. Her eyes darted across the page, absorbing the words her mother had left behind—lines written for a daughter who'd never fully understood what had happened. Until now.


　
"My dearest Diane,

I am so sorry. I was too weak, and I know I am leaving you with a pain I can never mend. Please understand, your father... I couldn't bear it any longer. It has nothing to do with you, nothing that you could have changed. You are the one pure, beautiful thing in my life, and I hate that I'm leaving you in his hands. Maybe, if I were stronger... but I've never been brave enough.

I can only hope that this letter reaches you when you are older, when you're ready to understand the choices I made, even if they seem selfish or hurtful. You deserve all the happiness and love in the world, and I hope that life has given you those things by now, even without me there to see it. Please believe that, whatever happens, I have loved you with every part of me. Remember that you were my light, my one joy, and that my leaving was never a reflection on you. Only my own weakness.

With all my love, always, Maman"


Diane's stomach twisted as the reality settled in, the finality of her mother's choice. She thought back to her mother's days in the hospital, to those nights when she'd sat on the edge of her bed, looking at Diane with a sadness she hadn't understood then. Those moments had always been shaded in mystery, softened by the family lie that her mother had passed from the same illness Diane now carried. And Diane had believed it, carried that quiet narrative for years, holding her mother's memory close as she dealt with the weight of her own struggles. But it had all been a lie.

Her mind reeled, trying to piece together the memories: her mother's hollowed eyes, the way she'd quietly withdrawn, the broken expressions Diane could only now recognize. And all this time, Aaron had known.

Diane clenched her fists around the letter, her body rigid, barely aware of her shallow breathing. A dark, growing anger surged through her chest, tightening her throat as she turned to Aaron. The words left her mouth before she could stop them.

"You should have told me," she choked out, her voice sharper than she intended. "It wasn't your decision to keep this from me."

As she spoke, the last light of the sun dipped behind the hill, casting a final orange glow over the cemetery before leaving them in shadow. The dark crept slowly across the ground, swallowing up the place where they stood, and Diane felt it seeping into her heart, thick and suffocating. It was as if the night itself had conspired to close in around her, pressing her down with the weight of everything she'd just learned.

She could feel the anger unraveling, words spilling out almost uncontrollably. "Do you have any idea what it's been like for me? I believed—" Her voice broke. She looked down at the letter, at her mother's handwriting, and felt her entire life cracking under the weight of the truth. "You kept this from me, and you thought that was for the best?"

The deepening twilight blurred her vision, the details of the cemetery around them fading as her mind filled with the memory of her mother's voice, her distant, quiet affection, and the terrible, broken truth of her final words. The pain of it was almost unbearable. She had spent years imagining her mother's death as some kind of tragic fate, something she could someday accept. But to know that her mother had chosen to leave her, that she'd left Diane alone to deal with her father's bitterness and cruelty...

The darkness gathered thickly now, pressing in around them, and she felt as if she might be swallowed by it completely. She wanted to scream, cry, to undo everything she'd learned in the past few minutes. She wanted to run away from this moment and hide from the weight of her mother's words, her apology, her confession. And Aaron—he'd kept her in the dark.


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THOUGHTS　'i never got to understand her, and now i'm just left with all this mess'　━━━

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[c u p p ii e]

xxxxx




MAY THIRTEENTH， ２０１８

A part of him was surprised that Diane wanted him to stay, but then he remembered his role in her life and the comfort he was supposed to provide for her, for Bentley, for everyone else, but at the end of the day who was supposed to provide comfort for him? It was only two years ago that Eleanor had come into his life, what about all the years before that?

So he waited, patiently and quietly, as her shaky hands tore open the envelope and read it over to herself. Albeit, Aaron knew what the letter was about, he never opened it because it was never his to open in the first place. But in more recent years the thought crossed his mind, the similarities between Isabella and Bentley. The two of them misunderstood and ultimately too good for this world, abused by someone they loved, and Diane now had to deal with it twice. At the very least Bentley was still around and there was time to change his mind, slowly but surely.

When she was through, her reaction was to be expected, upset of course, she was right it wasn’t his choice to make and yet he did. “I understand that Diane, and I’m sorry, I told you that,” he started but the more Diane rattled off accusations and blame the more upsetting the situation became for him as well. So he paused, waited for her to get it all out, and then finally asked. “At what point did you want me to tell you Diane?” Aaron didn’t mean to be condescending but he couldn’t help it, no, he didn’t understand what it was like for her not knowing, but she also didn’t understand what it was like for him either.

“When you found out you were pregnant at eighteen with my brother who couldn't, and still can't, even support himself?” Truth be told, that was the first time he had tried to tell Diane, soon after she found out Scout was growing in her belly, but stress had been the main cause of her hospitalization as of late and he couldn’t risk the complications.

“Or all those months that you and I both had no idea where Bentley was at all hours of the night? Remember the bruises and the busted lips he would show back up with, because I do?” he asked followed by a nonchalant shrug as if he hadn't a care in the world. When, the way he remembered it, it was late nights for the both of them, endlessly calling Bentley who would ignore them and leave them worried sick.

“Or should I have mentioned it when Bentley ended up in the hospital because he thought killing himself was a better option than— What?” another aggressive shrug, Aaron was so upset recounting such vivid memories. “Accepting that he’s worth more than the life our s**t parents had to offer and that he’s worth being loved? Just like you, just like me and Cherise and Scout, and everyone else.” It was the messiest time in his life, then, but that just went to show that Aaron had tried time and time again even when his life was falling apart because the need to put everyone else before him was all he had ever known.

“And let’s not forget you ultimately getting sick shortly after because my a*****e brother had provided so much stress on all of us that you quite literally collapsed from exhaustion and I nearly lost my God damn mind,” It was only as of recent things had started to get easier between the four of them and yet here he was shouting at Diane, sure that if the cemetery had been more packed he’d have an audience by now. Lucky for him it was only a few passerby’s, everyone already headed home for the day.

Each and every instance was reminder of how it would have soiled both the moment and memory of Diane’s mother if given to her in such difficult and uncertain circumstances. It was never easy for any of them growing up and Aaron, for the first time ever, wished Diane would really acknowledge that. “So don’t tell me that I don’t understand, because I do Diane, I really ******** do.” From where he was standing, he knew that Diane had every right to be upset, but not at him, not after everything..

[eggawoo]

　　　　　　　✧　D I A N E　M O R E A U　!

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LOCATION　her mother's grave　━━━　　　COMPANY　aaron, eleanor, & scout　━━━


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Diane's breath quickened as Aaron's words washed over her, his voice carrying a frustration that she couldn't quite escape. But her own emotions were bubbling over, a rage she'd never felt toward him in the years they'd known each other. The pain of the letter, the weight of the past, the feeling of helplessness—it all came crashing down on her.

"No, Aaron," she snapped, her voice trembling with anger. "You don't get to tell me you understand. You really don't. If I had known, maybe I would've done more. Maybe I would've been able to help Bentley before he ended up in the hospital! Do you think I wouldn't have? But you kept it from me, you kept everything from me, and now—now I'm supposed to just understand?" Her eyes were wild with anger, and she took a step closer to him, not caring about the distance between them anymore.

She couldn't stop the flood of "what ifs" from crashing in. "I could've—I should've—done more. Maybe if I'd known, I would've seen the signs from Bentley. Maybe I would've fought harder, paid more attention, you know? Maman's death... God, if I'd known what was really going on, maybe I wouldn't have just... sat back and let things go on the way they did. Maybe I could've kept things from spiraling out of control." Her voice cracked on the last sentence, guilt gnawing at her insides as she stared at Aaron with a look that was both hurt and full of regret.

'Aaron had a choice,' Diane thought bitterly. He had the choice to leave the orphanage, to start new, to finally make a life for himself. While she... she was never given that choice. It was always about what he needed, what everyone needed, and no one ever seemed to stop and ask her what she wanted. What she needed. The realization made the anger bubble up again. "You think you're the only one who's had to make choices?" she shot back, the words more pointed now. "Everyone seems to know what's best for me without even asking. It's always been like that, hasn't it?"

Diane could hear Scout now, her wails growing louder in the distance, but the anger in her chest was so consuming, so all-encompassing, that she couldn't bring herself to stop and go to her. Not yet.

The pain was sharp, the realization bitter. "You don't get to act like you're the only one who's had to deal with this," she continued, almost breathless now. "You can't just hold things back and pretend it's the right choice. You've made it harder for all of us. For Bentley. For me. And for Scout," she muttered bitterly, her heart still heavy with the weight of her own child's cries in the background.

Diane stood in the middle of it all, her heart racing, her chest tight as the weight of her own words sank in. The anger, the betrayal, the overwhelming sense of regret for all the years wasted—everything seemed to crash down on her at once. Scout's cries became clearer, more piercing, yet it was as if Diane couldn't move, paralyzed by the overwhelming flood of emotions that held her in place.

She felt trapped—between the memory of her mother's death, the pain of the past few years, and the chaos of her own family breaking apart at the seams. And yet, no matter what she did, she couldn't make it right.

And just as the moment stretched into unbearable tension, Eleanor stepped between them, her presence a quiet but firm barrier that stopped the fight in its tracks. Diane frozen state shifted, the weight of the confrontation lifting, if only for a moment. She took a shaky breath, the adrenaline of the argument still coursing through her veins. It was enough of a pause to let her focus on Scout's cries. Slowly, her frantic heart began to settle, and she moved toward her daughter, her own voice trembling as she sought to soothe her.

Diane's gaze softened as she looked around, her shoulders sagging with exhaustion. The weight of everything—the fight, the pain, the worry—was too much to carry any longer. She just wanted to go home. "I... I think I need to go home," she muttered, her voice small. She ran a hand through her hair, the tension still clinging to her like a second skin. "I can just ask Milo to pick me up," she added quietly, as if the idea of not having to face another moment of this was the only solace she could grasp.


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THOUGHTS　'what a shitty way to end mother's day...'　━━━

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