Mistress BatNeko
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- Posted: Tue, 06 Nov 2007 08:41:44 +0000
A quick yaoi-ish fanfic about the two man-sluttiest guys on Gaia. Hope you enjoy!
Make All Deliveries In Rear
It was not a difficult sign to understand, Liam though. All right, he wasn’t entirely sure if he should have capitalized “in,” but grammar aside it was fairly straight forward.
And yet, every week when Lance arrived with the new merchandise, he strutted in the front door like he owned the place. A box or two balanced on his bulging biceps, hips shifting to compensate for the weight. In summer sometimes he would have his shirt completely unbuttoned, and sweat would be glistening on his rippling pectorals.
Not that Liam paid attention to that sort of thing.
It had to happen eventually, Liam knew. One day he would just snap and punch that gleaming white grin right off of Lance’s stupid Ken-doll face. It was more then the sign, lots more. It was they way he acted like he was the hottest thing this side of Arizona in August. The way he was always making little comments about “packages” like no one knew what he meant. The way he flipped that two-toned hair of his like a Charlie’s Angel. Even the way he called Liam “bro.” Liam was not his bro. Liam would never be his bro. And one day he was going to tell Lance that. With his foot.
The little bell on the door jangled, letting Liam know it had been opened. He put on a good smile, not a great one, and turned to great the customer.
“Yo! Welcome to- Oh.”
Lance stood there, one box on his shoulder, one balanced on his hip, matching Liam’s smile. “Yo yourself, bro.”
Liam felt his eyebrow twitch.
“Not a big delivery today. About a half dozen of these little guys, and there’s one big package waiting for you.”
“Of course,” Liam muttered. He tightened his smile. “Okay, just let me get a pen to sign for everything.”
“Take your time, I’ll get the rest of this out of the truck.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah…”
Liam stood in the stock room and watched in silence as Lance made five trips to and from his delivery truck, jingling the bell on the front door every time. He was blocking the street. He was blocking the street. Customers needed to use that street! What was the point of getting merchandise delivered, if there were no customers to buy it?
Finally, the last box was stacked. Lance stood up and stretched, bracing his hands at the small of his back and popping his spine. Liam watched him, forgetting for a moment why he was pissed…then remembering as Lance favored him with another of those Aquafresh smiles.
“That’s that, bro. Unless you have any packages for me?”
Liam resisted the urge to make a double-entendre, and instead said, “That’s all. But could you please remember to come around the back next time?”
“Oh no, did I do that again? Sorry bro, I always forget who likes it in the rear and who doesn’t.”
“Yeah, well, I do,” Liam snapped, a second before he realized what he’d said. “I mean, uh…”
Lance’s grin went from Aquafresh to decidedly dirty. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
Liam’s mind raced. A comeback! His kingdom for a comeback! “Shut up.”
Lance laughed.
Something snapped.
And Liam pulled back his fist and punched Lance in the face.
Lance stumbled backward, tripping over a box and catching himself with one arm against the wall. He glared at Liam from under white bangs, finally no longer smiling. “What the hell?”
Liam was grinning like an idiot. “Been wanting to do that since day one, bro.”
“You’re no bro of mine.”
“Damn straight. And it’s about time you realized it.” He strode forward, looming over the other man. “Time you realized a few other things as well. I’m the hottest slab of man-flesh in Gaia, and I’ve had it with you trying to upstage me.”
“Dammit,” Lance shoved himself upright. “Who ever said anything about upstaging you?”
Liam blinked. “What?”
“I was just trying to get your attention. I didn’t know it was the wrong kind.” He shook his head. “You’re crazy.”
“What?” Liam said again. “Wait, you mean you were- hitting on me?”
“Duh! Why did you think I was always going on about packages?”
“And- and the reason you always came in the front?”
“To talk to you. Also kind of been waiting to make that ‘likes it in the rear’ joke.”
Liam’s knees went weak, and he sunk down onto a box of pants. “So you mean… All this time I thought you… And you were…”
“Pretty much.”
“Well s**t.” He looked up and grinned weakly. “Did I blow my chances?”
“Could be.” Lance rubbed his jaw and winced. “Depends. You think you’re willing to blow anything else?”
Liam’s grin strengthened, just a little bit. “Ah, the fabled single-entendre.”
“Well?”
“Depends. Where do you like your deliveries?”
……………………………………………………………………………………………
The next day, the “Make All Deliveries In Rear” sign was gone from Crate and Apparel. There were those that said Liam had hung it in his bedroom, other said he gave it to Lance. All any one knew for sure, was that Lance’s weekly stops at the store lasted a lot longer then they used to, and that he flipped the closed sign forward as he entered through the front door.
Make All Deliveries In Rear
It was not a difficult sign to understand, Liam though. All right, he wasn’t entirely sure if he should have capitalized “in,” but grammar aside it was fairly straight forward.
And yet, every week when Lance arrived with the new merchandise, he strutted in the front door like he owned the place. A box or two balanced on his bulging biceps, hips shifting to compensate for the weight. In summer sometimes he would have his shirt completely unbuttoned, and sweat would be glistening on his rippling pectorals.
Not that Liam paid attention to that sort of thing.
It had to happen eventually, Liam knew. One day he would just snap and punch that gleaming white grin right off of Lance’s stupid Ken-doll face. It was more then the sign, lots more. It was they way he acted like he was the hottest thing this side of Arizona in August. The way he was always making little comments about “packages” like no one knew what he meant. The way he flipped that two-toned hair of his like a Charlie’s Angel. Even the way he called Liam “bro.” Liam was not his bro. Liam would never be his bro. And one day he was going to tell Lance that. With his foot.
The little bell on the door jangled, letting Liam know it had been opened. He put on a good smile, not a great one, and turned to great the customer.
“Yo! Welcome to- Oh.”
Lance stood there, one box on his shoulder, one balanced on his hip, matching Liam’s smile. “Yo yourself, bro.”
Liam felt his eyebrow twitch.
“Not a big delivery today. About a half dozen of these little guys, and there’s one big package waiting for you.”
“Of course,” Liam muttered. He tightened his smile. “Okay, just let me get a pen to sign for everything.”
“Take your time, I’ll get the rest of this out of the truck.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah…”
Liam stood in the stock room and watched in silence as Lance made five trips to and from his delivery truck, jingling the bell on the front door every time. He was blocking the street. He was blocking the street. Customers needed to use that street! What was the point of getting merchandise delivered, if there were no customers to buy it?
Finally, the last box was stacked. Lance stood up and stretched, bracing his hands at the small of his back and popping his spine. Liam watched him, forgetting for a moment why he was pissed…then remembering as Lance favored him with another of those Aquafresh smiles.
“That’s that, bro. Unless you have any packages for me?”
Liam resisted the urge to make a double-entendre, and instead said, “That’s all. But could you please remember to come around the back next time?”
“Oh no, did I do that again? Sorry bro, I always forget who likes it in the rear and who doesn’t.”
“Yeah, well, I do,” Liam snapped, a second before he realized what he’d said. “I mean, uh…”
Lance’s grin went from Aquafresh to decidedly dirty. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
Liam’s mind raced. A comeback! His kingdom for a comeback! “Shut up.”
Lance laughed.
Something snapped.
And Liam pulled back his fist and punched Lance in the face.
Lance stumbled backward, tripping over a box and catching himself with one arm against the wall. He glared at Liam from under white bangs, finally no longer smiling. “What the hell?”
Liam was grinning like an idiot. “Been wanting to do that since day one, bro.”
“You’re no bro of mine.”
“Damn straight. And it’s about time you realized it.” He strode forward, looming over the other man. “Time you realized a few other things as well. I’m the hottest slab of man-flesh in Gaia, and I’ve had it with you trying to upstage me.”
“Dammit,” Lance shoved himself upright. “Who ever said anything about upstaging you?”
Liam blinked. “What?”
“I was just trying to get your attention. I didn’t know it was the wrong kind.” He shook his head. “You’re crazy.”
“What?” Liam said again. “Wait, you mean you were- hitting on me?”
“Duh! Why did you think I was always going on about packages?”
“And- and the reason you always came in the front?”
“To talk to you. Also kind of been waiting to make that ‘likes it in the rear’ joke.”
Liam’s knees went weak, and he sunk down onto a box of pants. “So you mean… All this time I thought you… And you were…”
“Pretty much.”
“Well s**t.” He looked up and grinned weakly. “Did I blow my chances?”
“Could be.” Lance rubbed his jaw and winced. “Depends. You think you’re willing to blow anything else?”
Liam’s grin strengthened, just a little bit. “Ah, the fabled single-entendre.”
“Well?”
“Depends. Where do you like your deliveries?”
……………………………………………………………………………………………
The next day, the “Make All Deliveries In Rear” sign was gone from Crate and Apparel. There were those that said Liam had hung it in his bedroom, other said he gave it to Lance. All any one knew for sure, was that Lance’s weekly stops at the store lasted a lot longer then they used to, and that he flipped the closed sign forward as he entered through the front door.
