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yuki_tora's journal hEYy!!


yuki_tora
Community Member
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2 comments
i`ll wait
this poem was written by me...so please read it and comment me. well, tell me what you think of it...alrite?..thanks heart

i`ll wait


poem by me

As i sit here alone in the dark,
Waiting for the day when you will give me ur heart,
I think about u,
And that is simply what i do all day,
Cuz now it seems like your so far away.
You said that u would never leave me,
And that u are here to stay,
But now it seems like you`ve left me,
With nothing to do but to cry all day.
Those words that you said to me,
I wonder if they`re fake or true,
Cuz i wish that i can hear them once again from u.
I loved u then,
And i love u now
And forever i`ll always love u.
All i wanted was to be loved in return by you,
But u shooked ur head and lefted me in the dark.
You`ve broken my heart,
And shattered it into pieces.
But yet i still love you,
Cuz forever my love for you will stay,
And forever i`ll wait for you till that day.




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User Comments: [2]
Immrama
Community Member
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comment Commented on: Sun Jan 16, 2005 @ 05:38am
pardon me for butting in but I have a few comments lol. I read and write a lot of poetry so I have a few comments. for one. eliminate the chat speak. "u" "ur" for example. And change "shooked" to "shook" "Shooked" isn't a word... shame for lefted me. Change that to left me. and thats all! really good poem I loved reading it. Do you write much?


comment Commented on: Sun Feb 06, 2005 @ 12:31am
Nice poem!



Niannie
Community Member
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User Comments: [2]
 
 
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