I have seen opportunities knock at the door of socially skilled ones, though so many others have the same academic and technical skills.
I accept that mingling with other people is not everyone's cup of tea.
Introverts do not like to participate in social gatherings. Even if they do, physical symptoms like nausea, increased heart beat, short breathe make them feel uneasy.
But no need to worry.
There are some techniques which can make you overcome your social anxiety. Only one thing you needed is the commitment to practice them.
1. Get motivated why you need to overcome your social anxiety:
Unless you understand why you need to overcome your social anxiety, you don't get motivated.
Social skills brings you more opportunities than you imagine.
Being social makes you feel more confident.
Team work has become an inevitable part of our career.
Psychologically speaking, socially skilled ones emit their emotions through their conversations directly or indirectly and lets stress out of their mind.
Getting motivated is the most important task in overcoming social anxiety. It constitutes 90% of our goal. other 10% includes tips , techniques and strategies to get those social skills.
So, the first thing you get motivated.
2. Never skip any occasion:
When you have social anxiety your mind finds innovative reasons to turn down and escape every social gathering opportunity. Instead of trying to boost your confidence to attend those you quickly find lame excuses to skip,
So, now take a firm decision. You are not going to deviate from this decision. If you deviate from this you are going to compensate by participating in more social occasions.
Take this into your mind, NOW....
" I will participate in each and every social gathering that comes to me. No matter what happens, I won't skip any. if i skip any I will compensate it by attending more."
3. Your friends are your teachers:
Observe people who are known as socially skilled, and learn from them. Their facial expressions, body language, phrases they use, how they respond to different situations etc.
There are some things that are not available in books. they need to be learnt by "watch and adapt' method only.
You don't need to reveal anyone about your observations. Just tell yourself. As infants imitate their parents, you too follow ....select, copy, adapt.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FtP4GlDho_M
What to do?
Take care of your
Har style
clean shave
dressing
shoe
body language
6. Find what people are interested in:
Starting conversation with others is very easy than you imagine.
Just follow a simple rule.
"find what people are interested in and ask questions"
This is a very old communication skill and there is nothing new in it.
people have a habit of speaking more about their passionate topics.
The advantage you have here is, you don't need to speak anything, just keep on asking questions one after another.
7. Deep breathe:
How hard you may try, still you may have these kind of symptoms in social situation,
Nausea
Shortness of breathe
Trembling
Sweating
to overcome these you need to acquaint and practice relaxations techniques.
Out of those all relaxation techniques, the simple yet powerful technique is
"Take a deep breathe"
Don't believe me?...do it and find the results.
8. Other relaxation techniques:
Practicing Relaxation techniques will certainly have a long term positive influence on you.
Meditation
Mindfulness for stress relief
Yoga
Progressive muscle relaxation
Guided imagery
Choose any of these techniques and make them a long term habit to reap extraordinary results from them.
9. Consult a psychiatrist:
Some times by following the above strategies, you may not be able to overcome your social anxiety. The reason, you might be suffering from GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder) or depression or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder which require medication.
Medication makes your anxiety reduced in a short span of time.
10. Positive Affirmations:
keep telling yourself these kind of positive affirmations. By telling yourself continuously, they enter into your subconscious mind and stay there.
This is a wonderful technique that brings miraculous results.
"Every breath I inhale calms me and every breath I exhale takes away tension."
"I love meeting new people"
"I enjoy being in a crowd"
"I meet new people easily"
"I am comfortable around other people."
