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Buried Wreckage My Soul
This journal contains a lot of poems, stories, and maybe even about my feelings on certain subjects. Just all depends on what I feel like writing about.
Our Meaning of Escaping
Running through the meadows hand-in-hand with someone whose face had never been revealed to me. The beat of my heart quickens, the pit of my stomach fills up with what feels like butterflies, and things that are ever unknown to me in reality wash over me whenever he is near. The unintelligible beauty that surrounds me; flowers of all colors and breeds, the scent of the wilderness around me. Hearing the sound of the wind rustling the grass about, to feel the wind upon my face, and my hair flowing within it. It was amazing, the adrenaline that I had felt at that moment. Laughing and running as we went, me and my other, acting like there was no tomorrow.

Soon - too soon - we came to a stop, more like my other had, I turn around to see the problem. Yet all I found was pure darkness, eyes widening I turn around to still find myself looking into nothing. Fright overtook me as I sank to my knees. Many different distinctions of screeches were heard. Some made my ears ring; others had made my body twist and thrash about. I had no control of my body. I could feel the thick blanket of death closing in. It felt as if I was burning and the smell of blood overwhelmed me. Other pains too foul to described took over me. Sweeping me up and leaving me gasping in its wake.

Just when I thought the pain would strike me mad before it killed me, crimson filled my vision. Blocking all other sources of light. A seething pair of crimson eyes. The indecipherable lust-filled gaze locked on me. Tears now spilled freely down my cheeks. I wanted to scream so badly, but couldn't, for the sound choked in my throat.I could not wretch me gaze from those blood-soaked eyes. My mind was blank and my body rooted to the ground. I could no longer feel the pain, for I was numb. Eyes now dried up of tears, blood shot and open wide, continued to bore into the eyes of the beast.

A deep snarl rang out in fury, both beautiful and ghastly. Instantly I broke away from the spell and spun around to find those familiar onyx eyes. I felt a gentle hand on mine as his other laid upon my cheek. Leaning in, he brushed his cheek against my other as I heard his musical voice whisper into my ear.

"Wake up, Rose, for this is all but a dream."






This is something I wrote awhile back at Disney World at the condo we were staying at. I've been wanting to write a book, but my literature skills aren't exactly at their best quite yet. Many ideas I have for my book and all. It's just really hard to know how to put it in words to catch the reader's attention. So far this is my favorite that I have written. If Gunge is reading this, I'd like you to correct me if you see errors. xd

Scarlett Wreckage
Community Member
  • 07/08/07 to 07/01/07 (1)




  • User Comments: [3]
    Mislead Follower
    Community Member





    Wed Jul 04, 2007 @ 04:31am


    Nope, I don't think I have ever read this. Honestly I love it, but.... please explain it to me. I love it without knowing what it means.... knowing would only make it that much better!....Wow feel kind of stupid a the moment....


    Gunge Lance
    Community Member





    Wed Jul 04, 2007 @ 11:31pm


    Review Section
    Bravo. You made me cry. I mean, that was just beautiful. You say that your skills aren't at their best, and that makes me wonder: if that isn't your best, then I would love to see you at your prime. You really captivated me there. Just from reading it, from the point it started to the end, the visuals I got were great and it seems to give off a deep feeling. If Gaia had a story contest, this would definately be rated among the best of them. Seriously, I'm not just saying this because we're friends. In all sincerity, this story was like a dish of Kablam with a side of Wow and an extra helping of Good God, and to think that it's only part of something... You have some serious talent.
    Error Section
    You don't have many errors, but I saw a few.
    In the first sentence, has should be had.
    The next sentence, filling should be fills.
    After ring, instead of a comma use a semi-colon.
    The same goes for the second body that follows after that.
    When you wrote 'Everything went to a sudden halt.', it should be 'everything came to a sudden halt.'
    I also think that you should combine that sentence with the next one, making it 'Everything came to a sudden halt, for I had made contact with a pair of crimson eyes with an utmost lust in them that I could not decipher.'.
    In the next sentence following that one, it should say 'I wanted to scream so badly, but couldn't, for I had lost my voice.'
    After that, 'All I could do was star into the eyes of a demon.' should be joined with 'My mind blank and my body still as stone.' using a semicolon.
    You should put a comma after 'and as wide as can be'.
    Lastly, laid should be changed to lay.
    Final Word
    I'm not sure if my corrections are correct or not, I don't like to use Word that much.
    Even it makes errors sometimes, so it can't be trusted.
    In short, I love your story and I hope to see more of it soon. XD


    Scarlett Wreckage
    Community Member





    Sun Jul 22, 2007 @ 09:43pm


    3nodding It is now corrected 3nodding


    User Comments: [3]
     
     
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