[PRP] Reconstruction (Melvin/Rep)

[Baneful]

Rep barked a laugh. "Naw man. It wasn't amazing. It was horrible. I almost lost everything I was and am, I almost forgot everything. Ace, Jordan, You, Rin, everyting and everyone. I wouldn't have been me at all. I'd just have been empty. It was just luck she spared me. It wasn't amazing, it was ******** scary and I could have ended up worse than dead."

It was baffling to him to hear the bizzare and awful things which had happened to him over the last few years called anything other than how he thought of them.

"And you know as well as I do that I'd never be allowed to lead anything. I'm just a murderer, a murderer they point at s**t they want rid of until its gone. And I do it before Sun and Moon even ******** get there, so they can clean up the s**t that isn't morally ******** ambiguous and get their deserved glory. I'm Death's garbage man and I'm fine with it, I wouldn't want anything more than that."

He shrugged. "Its not as glam as it sounds, let me tell you."

Moonkitsune

 

[MoonKitsune]

Melvin stared at Rep, sorting through the information that Rep was giving him and feeling more and more of a gap in spaces and time that were left empty. Rep had progressed so much in life that talking now showed the large gaps in where they last spoke. Really spoke.

Why was Rep really talking to him like this now? He had said it felt like ever since he talked, but what changed?

He didn't want to ask. He didn't want to ruin things.

He didn't want it to stop.

He wanted to fill in the gaps and holes.

"A lot of people are murderers and they give them power and positions. Just whatever they approve you to do - so I don't think you're like that. Not like other people." Not like Lawr, who had done it out of curiosity. Who had done it because it was there and he could. Rep was aware of what he had done, admitted he was a murderer and didn't sugar coat the hard fact of the matter. But....what did he know? Had he hurt more than that?

Was it worth even asking now?

But Rep said he was fine with it and didn't want more. There was no point in poking at it.

"I suppose I just always get a little green when I hear of people who get promotions or feel like they are making a difference. You sound like you are doing and seeing some great things - things that Caelius trust you to take care of. At least he is watching out for you? Is Harrison there with you?"

Baneful

 

[Baneful]

"It's fine in the end. I'm no worthy and its sort of how I like it. Whenever anyone puts me in charge of anything I completely ******** ******** it up. I'm shitty but that works for them, it works for everyone, so I'm happy with it. It gets me by."

He smirked at Melvin. "You always did get jealous of weird s**t, like you aren't a ******** great hunter already, finding Atlantis, runicing so much s**t. You are ******** accomplished but you are still always looking at the grass on the other side." he shook his head at the other man but not unkindly. "Try seeing the grass on the side you are on." he said.

"Ace doesn't come to the s**t I get dragged to, and I'm glad, it's stuff where I think they'd probably kill him. I'm like...protected sort of sometimes and it makes a difference."

Moonkitsune

 

[MoonKitsune]

"Yeah.....I guess. Feels more like I just fall into things. Guess it's harder for me to look at the bigger picture. Sorry. I didn't mean to sour what you've managed with me being weird. I'm working on...the grass thing." He just had a harder time looking at the good things he he felt so much had been lost or damaged and he haf so much to improve upon.

"Been trying to get my head straight after all this time. Fix things."

He took off his saftey glasses and glasses underneeth to set them aside.

"Didn't think about that. Would be terrifying to face that and worry about the person you love. I'd worry if I was home too though and not there to help. No win situation."

What would happen if Rep got hurt?

 

[Baneful]

"It's fine like. My s**t is always a bit sour, its how I am. But I'm fine with it. I'm amazingly ******** ok with my life how it is right now. More than I have been in a long time." He didn't mention that he'd been lower than he had been in a long time in the wake of the whole being a woman thing. It had taken a long time just to find his feet again.

"You'll sort your s**t out, even if things can't be fixed completely they can get patched together with duct tape like most s**t on this island. Enough to work, enough to get by."

He sighed. "Yeah it's .. it's pretty horrible. Ace doesn't like it and its obviously no ideal for me either. There's just a lot of s**t out there and I don't know if they'd get him. I'm more afraid of him getting hurt than anything else in the whole ******** world. He and Jordan are like anchors. Without them like, I think I'd just ******** float away for ever."

Moonkitsune

 

[MoonKitsune]

"I can see it. With both of you. I'm.. Surprised you even would want to talk to me after it all."

He avoided talking too much about Jordan. It was touchy for Rep and seemed to be a name he didn't tolerate Melvin to even say.

"That's a good way of putting it. Achors. This place and these things can sink a person. Make them list. Just looking for anchors now."

"So....how is your kid?"

 

[Baneful]

"Eh, s**t happens. Everyone is still alive. Everyone is still here." And that seemed about it for Rep, as capricious as the weather, one minute absolutely dead set against speaking to anyone ever again and the next almost approachable and friendly. It always just depended on which of his many demons was in charge any given day.

"Mask has been doing good, he enjoyed Christmas, got him some presents and s**t. Tough little ******** class="quote">

Moonkitsune