[BATT/PRP] O Come All Ye Hateful (Forera x Buffel)

[quite uneventful]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
YOU FOUND THREE ENTIRE POTATOES. YESSSSSSS.
3 small presents / Lose 1 hp

Maybe Forera could pick up some potatoes to actually eat this time. Then again, maybe she could just lug more of them at the employee. He seemed to be recovering— Couldn’t have that, could they! Swiping three more, Forera giggled, looking at the employee again— She didn’t care how much overkill this was, he was getting what he deserved, that was for sure!

HP: 6 - 1 = 5 HP

 

[tenaciousgadabout]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You've got your hands on three little statues of anthropomorphic vegetables, breakdancing. They're as tacky as they sound.
3 small presents / Lose 2 hp

Buffel watched as the employee was hit with yet another potato from the shelf. Though he could physically stand now, mentally he was broken. He let forth a harrowing scream at the inanimate shelf in defiance. Another potato, careening down after having rolled from the shelf, dove forth from the edge of the shelf for a ten-point landing in the troll's open yap. In that moment, Buffel had a curious mix of feelings. He softly grabbed Perore's hand as it lifted to hurl yet another potato at the hapless employee. Upon looking up at him, he shook his head at her and removed the potato. He then replaced it with the last mini-potato he had, as justice was still justice.

HP: 6 - 2= 4

 

[quite uneventful]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You buy two potatoes. Jackpot.
2 small presents / Lose 2 hp

Forera’s pump biscuit held no pity toward casteist assholes like him. Each hit he received brought another laugh bubbling from her throat. His scream only made her eyes harden. She’d suffered worse than a couple of dumb potatoes. She’d geared up to hit him, but was stopped by Buffel. Looking at him, she pursed her lips as he switched the potatoes. She looked at it, gaze more serious than ever, before breaking into her familiar grin. She didn’t need her emotions clouding her judgement, right now. She lubbed it at the general area of the other, wanting only to scare him. She turned around. “I think I’m ready to go. D’ya want anythin’ in particular.” She asked, though it was less of a question, more of a demand. Forera didn’t seem too happy.

HP: 5 - 2 = 3HP

 

[tenaciousgadabout]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You select three 'humorous' vegetable-shaped tea cozies. You're not sure what the joke is, they're just shaped like a - oh.
3 small presents / Lose 2 hp

The employee was now gurgling and foaming at the mouth, potato wedged in his open maw. He seemed to be semi-conscious at best, and was twitching in either pain or abject fury. Looking around this spud-filled prison, Buffel sighed. What even made him come in this store? None of his friends would even care much for potatoes, best he could reckon. "Naw, I'm good. An' you will be too in just a lick." Finally getting down from her broad shoulders, the yellowblood walked over to the employee. Carefully reaching for the troll's lanyard, he grabbed at what he needed: His Tuber Shack Employee discount card. Bringing it up to the counter, he proceeded to explain to the cashier that the employee was a dear friend and would love to come help them check out, but was unfortunately dealing with an overstocking issue. Being the gracious troll he was, he'd offered up his card instead!

HP: 4 - 2= 2

 

[quite uneventful]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You find an unlabeled box with a picture of a dancing root vegetable on it. The vegetable looks happy, so you figure it's a good sign.
1 medium present / Lose 3 hp

Forera found the yellowblood more and more smart with each passing moment. She wished she could just grab him and take him with her to the swamp, but he’d scream too much. Probably. He was also a pretty decent shot and had a good aim. Following him to the checkout line, forera was very sure she’d be meeting up with him on the flipside. “Wanna get some yummy food after this? It totes makes me feel better!” Nothing said happiness like a bucket of hot sauce and cluckbeast meat!

HP: 3 - 3 = 0HP

 

[tenaciousgadabout]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
Here are two shot glasses, to drink root-vegetable based drinks out of. They have miniature tubers painted on them.
2 small presents / Lose 2 hp

As they stood cashing in their items, Buffel beamed with pride. They'd sampled just a small taste of justice today, and it tasted exactly like a raw potato. She offered to grab food with him afterward, which was more than fine by him. "Absolutely, Perore! Let's cash out and grab a bite!" He may not have picked up that many of his gifts yet, but a quick trip to the Megacomplex for a surprise returning would net him enough store credit to grab things in the morning. The Spirit, eyes glazed over in befuddled mess of emotions one could only describe paradoxically as "dull shock," followed behind, glad that this shopping excursion was over. All three could agree they never wanted to see another potato ever again.

HP: 2 - 2= 0