[BATT/PRP] O Come All Ye Hateful (Forera x Buffel)

[tenaciousgadabout]

Quote:

Dry and Wet Goods Megacomplex
You spot a huge crate wedged behind a pile of mark-downed hammer pants. Is that ... is that a motorbike?
1 huge present / Lose 1 hp

Buffel watched as he and the tealblood bounded past the waves of viscious shoppers, looking in awe at the behemoth of a vehicle Perore had found. Next to it, he spotted a small-sidecar box that apparently came free with a promotion. Hatching a plan for a quick beetle-grab, he pointed at it. "Yeah, grab me up one o' those! I'll bring it up to the register after you so we can get two receipts, I'll return it later for some extra beetles when less people are here! Other than that I'm good!"

HP: 22 - 1 = 21

 

[quite uneventful]

Quote:

Dry and Wet Goods Megacomplex > Giggle's Mirthland
You've found a portable tent-in-a-can. The clown on the package ensures a waterproof and mirthful structure.
1 large present / Lose 4 hp

Oh man this kid was smart. The swamp could use the beetles, but she figured Cerpin's illegal beetle farm would do wonders on them. It wasn't like they'd broken any laws harder than they already did, heh. "Awright then, let's head back." Forera exclaimed, motorbikes in tow as they made their way to the shop from before.

After storing their purchases somewhere trustworthy, Forera stepped back into the mirthful shop for a tic, grabbing a tent in a can— Something that'd actually be useful for her, considering she lived in the forest now. "Mmnnmn. This place looks like it could use a little excitement, tho I don't wanna have these creepy juggies on my a**. Wanna get outta here?"

HP: 18 - 4 = 14 HP

 

[tenaciousgadabout]

Quote:

Giggle's Mirthland
You drag two giant, troll-sized, stuffed clown dolls down to the front. These are great purchases.
Gain 2 large presents / Lose 6 hp

Buffel ducked as they entered the creepy store once more. As Perore walked about, Buffel saw a necklace with a strange symbol on it. It seemed to call to him eerily. Grabbing it off he noted that it was indeed spooky, and also that Ri would probably love it. At the tealblood's suggestion to leave, Buffel nodded. The masks in the back we're starting to creep him out anyways.

HP: 21 - 6 = 15

 

[quite uneventful]

Quote:

Giggle's Mirthland > Helega's Tuber Shack
You've got your hands on three little statues of anthropomorphic vegetables, breakdancing. They're as tacky as they sound.
3 small presents / Lose 2 hp

Nodding affirmatively, Forera began moving to another store. “Awwwright partner. Cool necky-lace.” Forera commented, grabbing the kid’s legs and zooming off to the other store where they’d been unofficially kicked out of. Looking at the employee in the back, Forera looked up at Buffel and gave him a mischievous smile. “We gotta scare’im. It’d totes make my night,” Forera commented, swiping three little figurines off the shelf— They could use them to scare him…!

HP: 14 - 2 = 12 HP

 

[tenaciousgadabout]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You find three spud-shaped erasers, sitting at the bottom of a bin.
Gain 3 small presents / Lose 1 hp

Buffel agreed, picking up some small erasers off a shelf. As she moved, he kept his eyes peeled for the tall miscreant. Not paying attention, the boy bumped his head on a small sack of mini potatoes. Reaching quickly he snatched em from above, keeping as quiet as possible.
"Get me in close, I've got the first shot. This miscreant's gonna learn not to make assumptions the hard way."

HP: 15 - 1 = 14

 

[quite uneventful]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
YOU FOUND THREE ENTIRE POTATOES. YESSSSSSS.
Gain 3 small presents / Lose 1 hp

Forera’s eyebrow rose. “Hmm… That might get us in trouble, no?” Forera murmured low, grabbing a few potatoes herself and making her way closer to the other troll, metal fingers prepared to throw her own couple’a shots. “Hehe, kiddin'. Trouble’s m’middle name. I gotcha.” A wide grin spread across her face. “Are ya usually such’n advocate fer that?” She didn’t want to sound too biased, but hey, the rebels could always use a couple new hands…

HP: 12 - 1 = 11 HP

 

[tenaciousgadabout]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
YOU FOUND THREE ENTIRE POTATOES. YESSSSSSS.
Gain 3 small presents / Lose 1 hp

"Not normally," Buffel admitted. He wasn't the type to get into scrapes, but this was different! He was fighting injustice here, right? This guy had assumed just by looking at Buffel that he was the type to steal! That warrants a lesson in his book! "This isn't just makin' a fuss, this is about catharsis." Catharsis? He'd been spending way too much time with Pol it seems.

HP: 14 - 1 = 13

 

[quite uneventful]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You buy a pair of slippers that are designed to look like tubers. These better not show up in alt art.
1 medium present / Lose 1 hp

Forera harumphed before nodding her head a little. “That’s a lil disappointin’. We coulda hung out a lot more, lil bud. I’m all for fights n’ stuff, tho mostly for the hell of it.” So she said. No one would think an airhead like her would have deeper thoughts. “Catha-whaaat! Kid, y’have bigger words than a dictionary on that mouth.” Forera grabbed a few socks, dropping a potato in one and having an improvised sock weapon. “C’mon, let’s do this. I think I gotcha near enough, or do y’think I should bring ya closer…?"

HP: 11 - 1 = 10 HP

 

[tenaciousgadabout]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You buy two potatoes. Jackpot.
2 small presents / Lose 2 hp

Buffel looked through the openings between the shelves as they prowled left and right, getting closer and clsoer as they walked. Perore mentioned that they could've hung out more had she known he was up fer a good tussle now and again. "Ain't nothin' says we can't now!" He kept his voice quiet but cheery, not wanting to spook their prey. "Just a might closer, I got a plan on this one, don't worry. Ain't no one gonna pin this on us, y'hear?"

HP: 13 - 2 = 11

 

[quite uneventful]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You select three 'humorous' vegetable-shaped tea cozies. You're not sure what the joke is, they're just shaped like a - oh.
3 small presents / Lose 2 hp

Forera grinned. She definitely liked this kid. She’d have to keep him on close watch from now on. “Hey, where’d ya say ya lived again? I’m from up in Busthind, y’should visit me! S’not toooo cold, hehe.” At his request, Forera neared, grabbing a few cozies off the nearby counter and cracking her only hand. “Don’t worry, I’ll be reaal slow’n thoughtful-like. Hehe.” She grinned, getting them close enough to do what he needed. She gave him a signal. She hoped this was close enough— Any closer and her pec’s would be seen!

HP: 10 - 2 = 8 HP

 

[tenaciousgadabout]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You buy two potatoes. Jackpot.
2 small presents / Lose 2 hp

Buffel was perfectly in line with what he wanted. He gave Perore a small pat on her gigantic left shoulder to achknowledge her signal. Pulling the mini potatoes out of the sack, he reeled back, taking aim. After some careful judging, he lobbed the potato. It flew upward, high above the employee's head, rustling the bag on the shelf above him. The bag, which had a hole in it, shifted slightly. Casting another one, he hit the hole dead-on, and the potaotes began to shift, before one was loosed, lettin' heave the one behind it, and the one behind that, and so forth as they all began to barrel out, heading directly for the employee.

HP: 11 - 2 = 9

 

[quite uneventful]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You buy a pair of slippers that are designed to look like tubers. These better not show up in alt art.
1 medium present / Lose 1 hp

Forera was definitely proud. Watching the potatoes drip down one by one while they slammed into the other troll was almost like watching those prank shows on TV, except live. She held in a loud laugh, inching backwards and hiding out behind a large shelf. Thankfully, they were tiny. It was alright, if the employee came, she had a sock filled with potato she could use to slam another’s face in.

HP: 8 - 1 = 7 HP

 

[tenaciousgadabout]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You find three spud-shaped erasers, sitting at the bottom of a bin.
3 small presents / Lose 1 hp

Buffel watched the potatoes tumble onto his accuser and flushed with pride. Hanging out with Perore was a darn good time, that was fer certain! As the torrent of potatoes died down, he patted the massive tealblood on her shoulder and motioned for her to get some distance between them. If they were gonna do any shopping in time before they got kicked out again, they were gonna have to hurry!

HP: 9 - 1 = 8

 

[quite uneventful]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You buy two potatoes. Jackpot.
2 small presents / Lose 2 hp

Forera rose a fist toward Buffel, wide grin on her face. “We can get some yummy food after this. I just gotta get me some more presents for my friends. They’re uh, reaaall needy, hehe.” Forera whispered, uncaring if she ran into the employee again. He wouldn’t know it had been them after all!

HP: 7 - 1(splicing) = 6 HP

 

[tenaciousgadabout]

Quote:

Helega's Tuber Shack
You buy a pair of slippers that are designed to look like tubers. These better not show up in alt art.
1 medium present / Lose 1 hp

Buffel nodded in agreement and they set off again. Amidst the shops various potato themed knick-knacks, he struggled to find something worthwhile for his friends. He knew Akkira and Polair would be difficult. He'd have to find somethin' great that didn't waste its time lookin' pretty on account o' there visual impairment. He'd checked out some nice-feeling slippers earlier, and they would probably be a good side-gift for either of'em. Hopefully they wouldn't mind that they were the spittin' image of a pair o' tubers.

(Also taking half the hit for "Perore")

HP: 8 - 1 (-1)= 6