[SPR] Thinking of You / Thinking of Spring (Hadyn Star)

[tefla]

Hadyn Star was growing more and more frustrated with his life. Since he had left the Flock it seemed as if life had decided to throw him curve ball after curve ball. His home had been destroyed in the great fires that had swept through the lands and he had yet to find another place that he could call his own. Perhaps it was selfish of him to think of himself before others, considering his time spent in the Flock, but after a year of relative freedom he had a lot of things on his mind. It seemed that as if admitting to himself the way that the Flock had affected him was sufficient to keep others from associating with him too. It almost seemed as if an invisible mark had been left on his skin that marked him as damaged. It was how he saw himself even if it were not true. Perhaps a positive aspect of the time he spent as a stallion in the Flock was that he was prone to treat mares with more respect than he had before. The thought that he had gained something from that period of time was enough to bring a smile to his face.  

[tefla]

There was a brief thought that he would like to get an update on how Vanya was doing. The mare had been a gorgeous creature and although she had tricked him he could not begrudge her little charade. She had drawn him in like a fish on a hook and he had been gullible enough to follow her to her home. Thinking of Vanya had Hadyn sighing in wistfulness. He had grown uncomfortable and had finally snuck away during the early morning hours. He had watched carefully the routines and had learned when it was the best time to leave. There had been no one to challenge his departure. Almost quite the opposite to his arrival into the Flock.  

[tefla]

Perhaps it was a futile gesture but Hadyn Star was certainly not one to admit that perhaps things had been strained between himself and Vanya even before he left. There was nothing special about him, nothing that set him apart from the other colorful members of the male population of the Flock. The thought that he had been too ordinary to catch anyone's eye was definitely always at the top of his mind. Actually the only thing that made him special at first was that he was Vanya's first capture. That novelty wore off once he was in the Flock's territory.

Hadyn believed that what he needed was just to find someone who didn't care about what he looked like. He wanted to find someone who would love him for himself and what was inside.  

[tefla]

For now though Hadyn wished for just any form of company. The stallion was feeling the bite of loneliness. He wanted companionship. He craved it. Looking down at his reflection in a barely iced over stream Hadyn grimaced at his appearance. One could not be loved unconditionally until they learned to be happy with what they were. Hadyn thought that had been what he had with Vanya, but he had been wrong.

Shaking his head the stallion turned away from the stream and plodded through the snow that covered the ground. Spring was coming. Perhaps with the blossoms that would soon appear ... something would blossom for him. He could only hope that life would not throw him another curve ball. The stallion had experienced heartbreak once and he wished to avoid the feeling once more.