(PRP) Of My Bones

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

 

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

Knochen felt the bitter burn in his heart that often resided there. Looking at his brother, his half-brother, always made his temper rise. Half brother but much more than half—he was pure. Their sister Morsmordre was mad with the purity notion though she had no wings herself. Haxan their half-brother was pure and not as troubled by it as he Mors or as he was. He was mad with the grief of it, the lack of it. He had no traits of the kalona though his mother had been one. Her blood ran in his veins, it ran hot and strong but not strong enough.

Haxan and Morsmordre had what he wanted, everything he wanted. He was lesser than them. Lesser. Not even equal to his own siblings. What had he done to deserve this taint? Why was he not judged by the pure-bloodedness of his heart rather than his flesh? He was weak and there was nothing he could do about it. There was no saving grace, no way to change himself.  

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

Haxan stretched his wing slightly, he did not like waiting. But his sister was late. “She has come to rally us to her cause. She wants us to help her.” The moonlight gleamed off the bones imprinted on his skin and the skin of his half-brother. It was the one thing that they all shared. “She has come to make an offer.”

Morsmordre would want something from them, she always did. Or rather, she would want something from Haxan. Her disdain for Knochen was almost palpable. He was more like their mother than any of them and yet, he had the less of her blood evident on him. How he had envied them all of his life.  

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

“She comes for you. Not me,” Knochen said bitterly. “I am useless.” The darkness in his heart blossomed and consumed him. Morsmordre would use him yes, but it was Haxan she would wish to have with her and Haxan she would wish to please. He was nothing to her, less than dirt. He was fodder beneath her hooves. But why had she even asked him here? Why had she wanted to lessen herself to speak to him? He knew she had not changed her mind. Hope was dangerous and Mors was as ever, unforgiving.  

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

There was truth in Knochen’s words, ones that Haxan could not even try to deny. Bitterness consumed his brother and rage his sister—so alike and yet hating each other at every cross, at every opportunity. Mors had found her purpose serving a dark lord who ruled over her. She dealt in slaves and yet did not see she was a slave herself. He knew not what made her do it—lust? Power? Love? He had no idea what drove her to the manic heights of her beliefs. Was she only a puppet or tool? Or was she more? It was hard to tell.

She would likely ask them to join her cause. But Haxan had no love for he Master, for her AV. He believed in a certain superiority of kalona—but to force it on others? To bleed the Kawani and make it anew? Perhaps not that far.  

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

"I can see what you are thinking," Knochen bit the words off harshly. "It is you she comes for and you will turn her down. She will rage about it, because you are what she wants. She wants the purity of you. And she will not care if I come to her cause at all. If I do, she may make me her own slave. Don't you think brother?"

The bitter seed that had began in his heart so many years ago had had time to germinate. It was a choking thing, squeezing his heart until he was sure it would crumble to ashes and dust. Fine. Let her choose Haxan as she always did, let Falsetto Amachi choose anyone else but him.

He would show them. He didn't know how or when, but he would somehow show them. He'd make them all regret it.  

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

"You two have never gotten along. But wanting to be things you can't. There's no point in that." But he knew his words would not be well received. In his half-siblings eyes, he had everything they wanted. Who was he to complain or tell them they were being childish? It was easy to say with horns on his head and wings on his back.

"You are both blood of my blood, bone of my bone. I will not play these games. I will not tolerate it. We should bond together." It was a lost cause. Morsmordre was a slave to her Master who's purity and adoration she craved. Knochen was a slave to his anger. Nothing Haxan could say or do would ever change that. Not a thing.

"She would not enslave you," but the truth was that he was not sure.  

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

Platitudes and reassurances, that's all his brother offered him. Every time. "Do not think me a fool brother. We both know she is as deadly as the serpent she serves. She will not let us refuse her, not easily. At least not me. You know as well as I that she thinks me lesser." She was right. He was lesser, but then so was she. She may not be as less as he was, but then did it really matter? She wasn't pure either even though she played at these purity games. "Stupid pandering to me, tell me what you plan to do and do not cover your words in honey for my ears. Spare me that."  

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

The words were hot in his throat, choking him until he spewed them out. "If you would stop thinking so little of yourself, we would all be better off. She treats you the way she does because you allow Knochen. Spare me your empty words. Back what you say with her, don't let her manipulate you if you're tired of. Stop whining like a spoiled little brat and tell her to her face."

He could feel the burn of it in his face as he bared his teeth. "You two sort your stuff out and leave me out of it. I'm done with the both of you and your stupid plans. This will not end well mark my words. Refuse her as I will."  

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

"You have the right to refuse her!" Knochen screamed as his brother started to turn. "She'll listen to your answer because you are more than her, more than me. She values your opinion. What right do I have to refuse her? I am younger and less, and no amount of telling her I will not be treated this way will change it."

He shifted his feet, blew air out of his nostrils. "You would abandon me brother? You would leave me to meet her alone? Are you such a coward as that?"  

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

Haxan stopped at his first words, the truth hitting him like claws on his back. She might not let Knochen refuse her. He didn't know how far Morsmordre would take this blood purity now that she served her dark lord, Avada Kedavra. But then that wasn't true, he knew how far she would go for him. She would go to the ends of the earth for her lord and look up at him with foolish, foal-like eyes of love. Love of power, love of his self, infatuation, who could say. But she would serve him.

He turned to Knochen then baring his teeth. "Then come with me. It will do us no good to wait for her at her own leisure like her servants. She could try to take either of us by force, she could kill either of us. Whatever she wants, I want no part of because she is poison. Knochen, she's already in your veins, cut her out before she consumes you. Come with me."



He said it as though Knochen had a choice. But Haxan had always had choices, he had certain entitlements because of the way he looked and because of the largeness of him. Knochen had no such entitlements, he was stripped bare made to suffer through a world that prized traits and mutations more than simplicity. Because his markings, because his features were simple it was deemed his mind was so too.  

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

"And if I say yes to her, Haxan?" He tilted his head up to meet his brother's eyes. "She could raise me up, she could make me more than I can ever be without her. Is that so much to hope for? That perhaps she might in return for my dedication, give me what I long for? Are you jealous that I could become as much as you?" His heart was blinded by the hate that dwelt there, by the poison that his mother and his sister had fed into his veins. It had eaten at his veins until he was a creature who thought himself deserving of more simply because he had been denied it. And he did, he deserved it. The same blood ran in his veins as theirs, but that did not matter. Morsmordre would help him and if she would not, then he would cut her out. He'd show them both what it was really like to be afraid. He'd make them both pay for the way they had treated him.  

[Nyx Queen of Darkness]

“Then you are a fool brother. And nothing I say can help you. You’re already too lost, too damaged to see it. There’s nothing left to say.”