[PRP] Home Is Where the Chicken Is (Levi/West)

[Smerdle]

Following their experiences in the dungeon, West had reentered his room with a spring in his step, only to fall into bed and sleep for half a day. Graduating was hard work, and now that he had no classes to attend, for a time he couldn't think of any real reason to get up at all. The demon spent the next four days or so decompressing, lounging about and happily texting his ghoulfriend about a whole lot of nothing until one morning he realized that this was a pretty crappy way to go about starting his life. Soon the school would inform his parents that he had graduated, and once that had happened, one of them would surely be after him to find out what he planned on doing with himself. He needed to hurry up and come up with an answer before they got the chance to call.

It was this realization that prompted him to head to the maul, both to look for some of those real estate brochures that always seemed to be attracted to the entrances of retail establishments, and to test his willpower. He was not allowed to spend any more of his parents' money on frivolous s**t. If he and Levi were going to make it in the city, they were going to have to be thrifty. The very word almost made him gag.

West spent a large chunk of his afternoon sitting in the food court, circling the houses and apartments he liked best with a purple crayon he had lifted off of a pair of identical reaper toddlers. He didn't bother weeding any out for price or location, he just chose based on aesthetics and space. As it turned out, he had quite expensive tastes. It was something he should have been able to guess. He decided he needed a second opinion. A better opinion. The opinion of someone who was going to share this stupid hovel with him.

He texted the tatzel quickly when he was already more than halfway home.

Quote:

comin over

If she wasn't around, she would let him know. Hopefully.  

[nekoluch]

Uh, yeah, sure, hold'on! Levi, in her cross-legged position, shuffled the various flyers and papers together, scrambling to compile them on her bed when she got the text. It was as if West had arrived at the door already and she had to prepare her assignment for his evaluating. Ghoul, no one's grading you here. That's right; this was just going to be her giving him a general idea of what she'd found around town pinned to poles or supermarket boards. She'd already managed to prove her worth in school by graduating.

Quote:

ok

Canine teeth clenching on a pencil while hitting send, the tatzel ghoul placed the eyephone down and sat up on her knees with the pile now between both her hands. Levi sidestepped off the bed, down the stoop, and towards the table in the kitchenette to prepare for her guest. Plopping the stack down, she turned to retrieve some glasses from a cupboard and a pitcher from the fridge filled with a bright orange liquid. Her tail curled into the handle of the pitcher, setting it down in the center of the unfinished wooden table, followed by the two glasses which would remain empty for now.

As Levi leaned to place everything down, she looked at the topmost paper which listed a slew of places within the city limits that were of a more decent price range. They were still technically in the city, she thought, even if they did have outhouses instead of indoor washrooms. Some had plumbing; that was a plus. What else could be expected for half the price of those inner city homes? She had looked at those options only to feel like her green eggs and bacon would jump right out of her mouth and head for the hills to avoid the costs. They were just too much. The circled homes Levi lanced over on the page were hopefully decent enough for West to consider without having all the frills of those more costly homes. Just a touch'a elbow grease. She spoke words slurred by the pencil still in her mouth and nodded to no one in the room, exhaling through her nose audibly with a sigh. They could make something in here work, surely.

The ghoul sat down on the bench seating that coupled with her table and handled the listing while taking the pencil in her other hand. She would take another quick glance while waiting for West, just in case she happened to miss one.  

[Smerdle]

By the time he reached the monster dorms it was well past midday, though the sun was still bright in the sky. West strolled through the halls like he owned the place, tapping on Levi's door as a courtesy before opening it a crack. There would come a time when he would have to impress upon her the need to lock the damned door of their future house or all of their s**t would get stolen, but now was not that time. Maybe there was a witch in town who would sell him some sort of security... thing... that would magically protect the place when they weren't there. He sighed. That would cost money. Money he wasn't supposed to be spending, not even in his mind.

"Y'decent?" West quipped, pushing the door open wider and stepping inside. He smirked at the ghoul as he closed it firmly behind him, looking between the empty glasses and the papers she was holding for a second before moving to join her. What was on them was a mystery, but he presumed she would tell him what she was doing if he stuck around long enough.

He took a seat on the other side of the table, pulling his roll of listings out of his back pocket and trying to spread them in front of him. Unlike his diploma, the paper they were printed on had no intention of remaining flat. As soon as he let it go, it curled back up into a tube. He grabbed the stack, folding them back against their curve before smacking them on the table again. The demon grinned as her pitcher rattled. "Sorry." He wasn't sorry.

"I wanna talk about houses. I can just... feel my dad's eyes on me, y'know? And I wanna be ready when he calls, so he doesn't mow me over with..." He fluttered his fingers. "How he is."  

[nekoluch]

Her ears popped up at the greeting (or concern) coming from the door that creaked open. Oh, aye, come in, come in. While she stood up, Levi turned to shift her tail so it hung back out from the underside of the table behind her, instead of where West's legs needed to fit should he sit in front of her. It was a habit done for guests so they didn't get the sensation of something wriggling against their legs; not that she had a problem with rubbing her tail on the wrath demon in particular. The hand that held her pencil now situated itself under her chin, propping her head up over the table with a smile as she waited to explain what she had for him. This was just in time for West's show of disconcertion towards her glass pitcher. The tatzel thought of the potential cost of said pitcher and gave the wrath demon a good glaring, ears turning back, before she took note of his papers. Her ears then returned to their upward positions and the ends of lips upturned.

Yer reading inta'ma head, boil, dang. Was thinkin' right 'round those lines myself. Lookie'ere! Her other hand flattened out over her pile to suggest West take a gander at her pencil markings on the topmost newspaper page. See yew done yer homework too, eh? kekeke. Levi leaned forward more to try and make out what the boil's rolled up documentation revealed, but it was hard to make out the details through his fingers.

But now what's all this 'bout yer Pa? If this ain't gonna sit right with yer folks, West… The ghoul slouched and her face appeared to drain of energy. If this wasn't enough of a clear sign she dreaded their disapproval, her tail sinking to the floor was an undeniable giveaway. I'll be respectin' his opinion. It ain't pocket seeds we're talkin'bout 'ere so I'd understand if they've got need fer it. Seeds don't grow on trees… Sure, Levi had seen West many-a-time buy extravagances for both him and herself in the past, but expenses had to catch up at some point, right? All his purchases had been on his mother and father as well. Who was to say they were still able to fund such things- and a house, no less.

How...is he? Did his father have some case of FEAR-deficiency. The ghoul now took on concern that her future Papa-in-law might be wearing thin in his old age.  

[Smerdle]

"How is he?" As far as he knew, his father was fine. The boil looked confused for a moment as he thought back to what he had said. "Oh. Oh! He's not sick or nothin' or I'm sure I woulda heard. My dad's just... he's got a way of puttin' things that can make y'feel real dumb. An' he's as good at talkin' as I am at hittin' things." West peeked at the pile she'd made as he spoke, clearly seeing as little of it as she had of his. "It's not that it ain't gonna sit right, exactly. It's jus' that he'll expect... somethin'... now that I got a diploma. If I keep sittin' on my a**, he'll turn it 'round so we don't got a chance at impressin' him."

As soon as he had that letter, Duran would use it as an excuse to harass him again, of that West had no doubt. If he had any sort of plans, however, his father would have little choice but to respond civilly or be seen as throwing a tantrum. Having a house all picked out like a responsible adult would rattle the older demon, and every little bit of rattling helped. Sadly, West suspected that the whole 'serious ghoulfriend' bombshell had already been dropped. It was a shame. Sometimes he wished his uncle would think before opening his big mouth. "So long's we have somethin' t'show him, he wont have nothin' t'grouse about. It's like a game."

While all of this was largely the reason behind why he had shown up today, West still wasn't really all that interested in talking about his father. He held out his crayon-covered listings, shaking them slightly. "Here, here. Swap. Or at least tell me what y'picked."  

[nekoluch]

So he's a smooth talker? Tha'politician kind? The demon had requested to see the tatzel's pile of papers, but the issue of payment and keeping on proper terms with her in-laws who funded her living space was first and foremost at the center of her attention.

Levi was now the host of a perplexed expression as well. If West's father was able to talk himself through things as well as the boil punched, he could overrun the mayor himself. As smart as she was, the ghoul could admit that she and West couldn't manage such a feat in any measure. What did West's father want? What would appease him? Yer sayin' we need ta'impress him with somethin' other than our smarts? What's he want? What's tha'point of tha'game? Surely that smart of a demon would want the best for his only son. What did he want of West post-graduation?
Ya'll got a family business too?
They obviously didn't farm, but maybe West's father expected him to head back home for some sort of trade grooming?  

[Smerdle]

"Smooth talker." West snorted. "Yeah, y'could say that. But he's not a politician at all. That'd be... well... it'd be int'restin' fer everyone." He had never had a reason to think what a government run by Duran Warrick might be like, and now that the idea had been planted, he was glad he had been spared those thoughts until now.

"'Impress' was prob'ly the wrong word t'use," he continued, lowering his small stack of paper and trying to flatten it again. He swallowed. There really was no good way to say 'if we show him anything at all he's sure to be impressed because he doesn't think I have the sense or survival skills of a pathling' was there? He settled on, "Th' game's in his head. He jus' wants t'see me try." It was sort of the truth, so it would have to be good enough.

"We don't got no fam'ly business'r nothin' neither." As a scareling he hadn't known what his father had done to get their money. Being constantly surrounded by other well to do children had led him to believe being rich was what everyone was, and it had simply never occurred to him to ask. Since then, he'd seen some things that made him think he was better off remaining ignorant.

"He'll pay fer whatever. We jus' gotta be serious about it." Duran would find their choice sweeter if it was expensive, if only because a more costly home would hang over their heads, even if he assured them they didn't have to pay him back. West tapped his papers. "We gotta agree. Show we know what's best."  

[nekoluch]

I guess that makes sense. Levi tapped her index finger on her chin before nodding at this conclusion. Show some guts n' that we mean business. We can take care of our own. I hear ya. The more she considered it, the better West's father's position sounded. It wasn't unreasonable to request his son be able to account for himself at adulthood, she affirmed. So too should she consider her own family's dependence on her being able to maintain a living space for her own… family one day. Levi just stared at West for a moment while he tapped at his stack and prompted her for action on the note of research. Uh, right. So, let's both have a go at right now. We'll say some of our picks n' we can decide what sorta place we got in mind, yea?

Levi sat up straight again and lightly tapped the palm of her hand over the table top, just enough to make her point but not quite to agitate the pitcher of liquid again. Have'a seat, West, n' stay awhile. Let's git started on fixin' up some fandangle of'a place. Now- The tatzel sat up a bit and leaned over the table, craning to take one last look at a few of her circled choices, before turning the frontmost page of her pile towards the boil for his better viewing. I was thinkin' this one's a good startin' place.

Quote:

SALE HOUSING FOR TWO OR MORE
SUPER DUPER CHEAP!!! Includes spacious living space and four corners for ample bedding and activity. Kitchen and bathroom a possibility with a little work. Friendly neighbors will gladly allow use of their bathrooms in exchange for cans of cider. CALL JONAS NOW 945-6578

Good neighbors n' space. Just gotta make up what we want inna bathroom n' kitchen! It's closer to tha' city than lot'a tha' others too. But this ones pretty good too. Levi scanned the page and stuck out a claw at another circled ad.

Quote:

AFFORDABLE AND SUSTAINABLE HOME! 2 bed + kitchen + bathroom
For outdoors enthusiasts. Big lot, off the ground and no shortage of foliage. The house gets bigger as the tree grows! Bathroom available at outhouse by the base. DeadOak Tree at 45°φ, 60°λ

Could go fer strolls n' spar without a soul ta' see. Bit farther out than tha'other but they say it's fer good seed, so could be good ta'look into. Levi peered up to gauge West's impression of her two prospects. She hoped they'd be on a close enough range with his. Levi had considered what seemed affordable enough to not be overly outrageous on his parents' pockets, but enough for them to get started.  

[Smerdle]

To his credit, West hadn't thought that coming to an agreement with regard to their future home would be fast or easy. He'd anticipated some opposing ideas on cost and was ready to argue that no matter how many rooms a place had, a house wasn't a house if the walls were made of lashed together bales of hay. He hadn't imagined their discussion would prove immediately frustrating, but he was prepared for conflict and managed to hold his tongue as he read Levi's first offering. With every supposed virtue the advertisement extolled, his expression sank further into careful neutrality, and by the time he was done reading, he honestly wondered if he could make it through another.

Cheap. No kitchen. Drunken neighbors. Shared bathroom.

"'Kay," he managed, leaning over to read the second ad. At first this "affordable and sustainable home" sounded somewhat promising, certainly moreso than the jackdamned empty room. He even cracked a smile halfway through, at least until he got to the end. "A tree," he said softly, the second word dragging slightly as it faded away. West closed his eyes, and forced himself to think of the virtues of the isle of war as he searched for something good in all of this. Had it been anyone else he wouldn't have made the effort, but he had to try for Levi.

Okay. If he overlooked the outhouse part, he was willing to admit there were one or two positive things about the place. The lack of nosy neighbors was nice, and being able to spar whenever they liked was also a—

"No."

The demon seemed surprised by his outburst, his mouth remaining open for a moment before he thought to backpedal. "I mean, not no exactly, jus'... I kinda want us t'have our own bathroom that's not a damned outhouse. An' I didn't wanna build..." Rather than make things worse by trying to explain, West shuffled through his papers until he found his own page of cheap homes. They certainly weren't the most economical listings his pamphlet held, but he had kind of skipped to the middle without looking at the lower end at all. He turned the pages around so she could see them and pointed one out.

Quote:

CEMETERY VIEW COURT - 2 BED, 2 FULL BATH, PLENTY OF NATURAL LIGHT
One story home in established gated community. High ceilings with skylights. Pool in courtyard. Minimal backyard will save time and money. 300,000 seeds.

"I know it'd be nice t'have more outdoor space, but all th'other stuff'd make up fer it, I think." The second ad he pointed to had a certain word scratched out with more fervor than was probably necessary, but it could still be read fairly easily through the crayon. "This's snooty, but it's still kinda cheap so there's prob'ly somethin' wrong with it." He shrugged.

Quote:

1642 HOLLOW PUMPKIN ROAD - 3 BED, ONE AND A HALF BATH, SPECTACULAR LAKE VIEW
Perfect first home for a money-conscious demon family. Fully furnished basement and spacious attic. 325,000 sd.

"See? Walls. Rooms n' stuff. They'd be nice." West looked at her with a slightly hopeful expression that he wasn't aware he was wearing.  

[nekoluch]

No? Just an immediate dismissal? Levi's ears twitched as if to reset her hearing capabilities, eyes wider than before the rebuttal. She pulled the paper back towards her and rested her crossed forearms over the table while the boil elaborated on his one chosen word before concluding that she'd chosen poorly.

Don't see nothin' wrong with an outhouse. Used one fer years. Truthfully, Levi's home had a bathroom of its own, but it was when the ghoul was with the other tatzel scarlings in the shed that represented their schoolhouse that she made use of such a facility. There were also outhouses about the fields for workers, belonging to various families, so no one would have to go running into a house tracking mud or trail too far from the job. Outhouses had their benefits; if depending on one as a restroom for awhile meant a cheaper house, well, the tatzel ghoul reasoned that it would be worth it.

West went on to suggest he didn't want to building for their home, however. This was where Levi's brow straightened in confusion again, slightly exasperated by the thought that they'd be buying a place without a small bit of work to be done to make it their own. The ghoul had rather selfishly wanted to keep her own plants growing somewhere in the ground, but most homes within the city seemed to lack that sort of space. If making space for them was an option, the tatzel wanted to believe it was something she and West could make themselves. Her candy corn vines had been with her through their years at Amity and she'd taken care of them as best as she could, but they needed open soil to really take root.

It was the way they were meant to be grown at home.

Of course, with West's parent's fronting them the funds for this city plot, Levi also had to consider that any option of growing crops could potentially be non-existent. Should the true owners (his parents) not want renovations, Levi would have to have her uncle pick up her vines and take them back to tatzelwurm town. At least they'd continue growing back there. Maybe she could stock up on candy corn once in awhile by visiting her family. This dilemma obviously bothered the ghoul, but out of respect, she'd make due to accommodate her new kin.

Luckily, her downcast expression didn't last. Levi tilted her head to look at the paper West presented, reading the text he pointed to and trying to picture the scenery in her head. Uh, yea. So they got gates; seems fancy. She wanted to make the best of this and put on a good face despite the dishearting "minimal" outdoor space bringing about her concerns again. What's this 'bout high ceilings with skylight though? They got glass roofs? So they're sayin' tha'roofs ta tha sky? That don't seem right if ya'can't put yer head through it... She didn't mention the blaring cost of the place either. The numbers were in the six digit range- multiple times over! The ghoul would be working till she was Gran's age to pay this sort of seed off.

Levi took in a deep breath before reading the wrath demon's next find, exhaling audibly through her mouth to prepare herself. 3, okay… that- wait, what's this'ere? How'd they make half'a bath?! What sort of builders were these demons? In the back of Levi's head, she considered that it may have been a good thing West didn't want to construct anything for himself if this was the case with demons. Not just'a half but they want 325,000 seeds fer sawin' tha'thing?! Jack dangit'in'a'ditch! Ya'gotta be kiddin' me! THAT'S what's danged wrong with'it! The back of the ghoul's open hand smacked down on the paper, over the ad, during her outburst. Levi felt completely outraged by the fact that: 1) Someone thought to cheat them out of two full baths, 2) West could have been taken for a fool and 3) Someone asked THAT much for an illogical half-bath. Jack almighty… Levi held her head in her hands, starring down at the table, taking in another deeeep breath and exhaling before sitting up straight again and starring silently back at West. That may have come out a bit thickly. The tatzel read through the ad again at a glance and looked back up to West while trying to maintain a reasonably neutral expression.

Lakes 're good n' all. Could mean fishin'r swimmin', both things that Levi would be enthralled to partake in daily, but can't say it's somethin' we need ta'be payin' for. Whole thing just seems like a bit too much fer lil'ol'us, don't it? The tatzel considered her own ads at that moment; she and West were nowhere near one another on this right now. They'd need to look back through their research and try for something more refined, but not so refined at the same time.
Maybe we better give things another look-through, eh? Giimme a sec'ere. Levi's fingers trailed through the corners of her pile, trying to recall which were the more high end flyers she'd come across, hoping they'd be a closer middle ground for West to consider rather than jump the goat and pay much more than needed in seeds.

Ah! This one's… She scribbled a circle around the ad twice with her pencil before spinning it around for the boil and pointing at it with her index finger. Maybe more like'it?

Quote:

1 BED + 1 BATH + 1 KIT + HOT TUB!!!
Cozy for starters. Semi-furnished living quarters. Dishwasher and wash/dryer included. Hot tub heat provided through tubing system connected to economical and adjustable fire source in the backyard. Only patched up once; fits 5-6 scarlings. 109,999 sd. Contact Sam-2567932

I reckon its got walls. Yer lookin' along these lines, right? Its got a pool too.  

[Smerdle]

Having rejected her initial choices rather involuntarily, West vowed to listen to the ghoul's defense of them without interruption. As it turned out, she didn't even try to convince him they were worthy. Instead, she made some rather valid points with regard to his selections, points that he had barely even considered at all. Deep down, he had known that many of the features of homes closer to the center of the city would not appeal to her, but what he hadn't imagined was that they would be outright uncomfortable for the ghoul. She needed extra space that he did not, and she had practically grown up outdoors. She probably missed all of that after Amityville. West thought he wanted a sprawling home with skylights and gates to keep people away, but maybe that was his father talking. As she had said, most lakes were free, after all.

The boil inhaled deeply, pushing the air back out in a sigh that ended in a grin. Inching closer toward her way of thinking might have been annoying, but that whole 'half a bathroom' thing was still enough to keep his mood light.

"They dun cut it in half fer real," he said, sliding his offerings back over to his side of the table. "It jus' means there's no shower. An'... um... yeah. Maybe these're too much fer us. Sorry fer gettin' snippy." It almost hurt to say, but they wouldn't get anywhere if he wasn't willing to compromise. On the subject of outhouses, however, he was standing firm. West pulled her new ad closer to him, lips moving silently as he read.

"This one's better. We could check it out, maybe. I dun think I like where they're goin' with th' scareling thing... uh... not the havin' room part, jus' the..." He paused, his smirk turning sour. "It jus' says somethin' 'bout th' neighborhood, I think. Some scareling's're fine. This sounds like they're all drownin' in 'em." He lay the paper flat, pushing thoughts of squirming, defenseless demons and tatzelwurms well away. "We got a 'maybe' pile? Here." He folded the corner of the page down, running his thumb over it once more to sharpen the crease. "Got any more? My ads might not fit our... uh... new standards."

West flipped through his listings some more anyway, examining several before turning another on Levi. "See, this's the closest. It's in th' bargain section."

Quote:

14 MOONLIGHT LANE - LUXURY HILLTOP CO-OP
1 bedroom, 1 bath, wood-burning fireplace, large kitchen with all new appliances. South side of building overlooks Howling Gorge, Shriek and Moan's Most Haunted Gorge three years running! No pets. Call 347-5124 for an appointment. 200,000 sd. + monthly maintenance fees.

"Master's not really th' sneaky sort neither." As annoying as she could be, he wasn't leaving his scareon behind.  

[nekoluch]

OH, a'half bathroom. Guess that makes more sense. At first Levi questioned why they hadn't specified it was the room that was incomplete and not the actual bath itself, but quickly established she was likely the odd ball in this argument. The term was new, so it could have been something fairly common to city homes. It hadn't caused West the slightest of concerns; then again, neither did 325,000 seeds but Levi ruled that out as a special wrath demon trait. The ghoul slid her page, with newly well-creased corner, off to West's left in their "maybe" pile while he passed her something anew.

Immediately her body tensed to the word "luxury" but one other thing caught her eye and her question popped out instead of playing through on her inner monologue as had typically been the case thus far. What's a co-op? co-operation? You wanna live with other folks? Levi looked straight at West, completely baffled by this offer; this was West. West wanted to live with others? Unknown others? West?? This was the same boil she found at the back of every classroom and away from every table at celebrations. As far as Levi had figured, West was a boil who liked his alone time.

He'd already seemed to rule out the place on his own with what she later read as the "no pet" policy and agreed. Critters're regular family just like tha'rest, soes it looks like a no-go anywho, I guess. Shame seein' it fer a lower cost 'least. West had tried to come down from the 300s, so the tatzel felt that had to be a positive note to be commended. Her innards would sit at her chest rather than up in her throat now. They'd inched closer to escaping through her mouth the more she considered living permanently with "monthly maintenance fees." That sure didn't sound like they meant utilities.

She searched West's bargain page herself now, wondering if there was anything else on there he was, perhaps, overlooking for some reason. Surely there had to be others like this one but not as… demanding?

Not really. They were largely filled with odd requests/demands/prices/things she didn't understand.

Wonder where this is… Levi spun the listings around again for the boil to read for himself, pointing out her findings.

Quote:

8996 POISON TOADSTOOL CRESCENT - 1 BATH, 1 BED, 1 KITCHEN
Perfect first home for couples or bachelors/bachelorettes. Long time previous owners. Secluded surroundings but within reasonable traveling distance to inner city. Call Susie Smokestake of Tombstone Realtors at 894-3573 for inquiries.

It was pretty vague on the details, but the basics were all there. The only thing she really needed to know now was a price. Lot of questions on this one, but think it's worth'a look? We'd have ta'call this sales lady though. Noticed lots of places like ta use 'em. They a hassle? It made the ghoul feel like she was looking to buy a very expensive shirt with those harpies breathing down her neck again. Why did shopping with West always mean she had a handful of sales people following her in every store?

Wager they're tha'hagglin'sort? Maybe? That could be a plus...  

[Smerdle]

"Nah," West replied. "Co-op's jus' a word that... well... I dunno what it means exactly, only that they use it when they're talkin' 'bout apartments." Nodding when Levi deemed the place's pet-free requirements unacceptable as well, he leaned forward and reclaimed the brochure when she offered it. He was under no illusions that he might have overlooked some listings for reasons he'd never bothered to quantify, but as soon as he saw this one again, he knew exactly why he hadn't originally included it.

"Yeah," he said, drawing the word out a bit as he thought of what to say next. Talking to people was not the demon's strongest suit, but he had neglected to consider the very personable tatzel he was moving in with. "I left off th' ones wit' real people t'talk to 'cause..." He folded the corner of this page down as well and skimmed the ad again. "Just 'cause. It does sound good, so long's yer th' one who calls an' does most o'th' hagglin'." If he called, whatever price this... Susie Smokestake had in mind would surely triple by the time they were through. "An' dun get yer hopes up too high. Them not listin' much about th' place makes me suspicious."

West sat back, still in possession of the flyer. If they were seriously considering listings with realtors now, he could probably find some others for them to look at. Or maybe just one.

"Two-six-two Destruction Drive," he mused, the street's name itself making him grin before he had even read anything important. "One bedroom, one bathroom, an' a basement. Hm." His experiences with basements weren't the sorts of experiences he actually wished to repeat, but considering that he had no intention of imprisoning anyone in his, he probably wouldn't have such problems. "I'm assumin' it has a kitchen too," he said. "Close to th' city. An' it's in th' value section."

He handed the ads back to Levi for her final input on the Palace of Destruction. "Three's a good start, if that one suits ya. If any of 'em are too gross when we go t'see 'em, we can knock off any of th' other places that person's sellin' too." It seemed like a valid strategy.  

[nekoluch]

Oh- He skipped ads due to the calling? West admitted he just didn't want to talk to strangers and completely neglected cheaper choices; that was more like the boil she knew. Jack help her. Fine with'me. The tatzel snorted, shaking her head, before the demon began anew with another ad.

Destruction Drive, yeah. Sure sounds like'a place missin' one'a yew. One brow lifted when she smirked up at West, chin resting in one of her hands. Guess it wouldn't- er shouldn't hurt none ta'go see it neither. Seems its got plenty'a rooms. Maybe her candy corn could take up their basement? They wouldn't see much of the sun, but surely there was some way to work it out. Maybe she could build in a basement…window. … The ghoul realized it wasn't all that likely to work unless she wanted soil pouring into their home; her face expressed this concern. Close ta'tha' city is good too. If the price was right, she'd make due with what they had, keeping a look at the positive aspects overall as West handed her the ad. Nodding, the tatzel's tail came around to curl onto the handle of her pitcher, pouring the bright orange candy corn juice into her glass. I don't reckon they'll be able ta'pull a fast one over tha'both of us, even with their city slick yappers. This ghoul 'ere ain't spendin' any seeds on nothin' short'a- She thought for a few seconds of something to summarize what an ideal home would be and how she could articulate it in so few words to West. She settled for just stating the simplistically obvious. Fit fer yew n' me. So long as it was for them to live in together, it would undoubtedly work out, she reasoned. Any fer yew? Her tail dangled the pitcher above the glass on West's left, opposite her own filled glass on the table. I guess we're ready ta' start takin' a look at these places. Once I git Miss Susie on tha'phone. Yew have anythin' ta'munch on today, boil?

It was undoubtedly an out-of-place question, but looking at the glasses resulted in the tatzel's need to provide sustenance at its full capacity. We been at it fer awhile. Levi piled the marked ads, stacking the rest of their real estate articles together in another pile on the table should they ever need to come back to them. For now, she was tidying up. Whadda'ya say we make somethin' sweet, yew n' me, hmm? Elbows propped onto the table, Levi folded her forearms and leaned forward expectantly. It had been awhile since she'd baked with West and, as if the juice wasn't enough, Levi had a hankering to snack on something from back home. Tha'juice'll go good with 'em!  

[Smerdle]

West nodded, pleased that the whole "cold calling some adult who held their future home in her hands and being expected to make a good impression" thing was no longer his responsibility. He sincerely hoped one of these places would be fit for them, as Levi put it, if only because he didn't think he would be able to stand going through this process more than once. The promise of the actual move didn't bother him, in fact, he was almost excited about it all, but pretending he knew what made a house worth buying, or smiling and playing nice when he wanted to intimidate, or being scrutinized by new neighbors? Those were all things he'd require a lot of bacon-covered pathling to get near a second time. Or at the very least, a really good excuse.

Catching the motion of her tail out of the corner of his eye, West deliberately pushed the excess negative thoughts out of his mind and smirked at her offer. "Sure." He waited until she had poured to take a sip, sighing soon after he had swallowed. Even though he had picked up something to eat at the maul, he wasn't about to say no to spending time with his ghoulfriend, even if that time would be spent making sugary treats. Not that he had a problem with sugary treats either. But now he was just stalling. West set his cup back on the table and flicked at her tail playfully.

"Might have," he said. "But I could have more."

It was only after he had agreed and had another swallow of juice that he realized he had missed a veritable boatload of innuendo he could have easily and more intentionally capitalized on. West looked troubled for a moment, wondering if he might go back to try to cash some of it in, but he quickly decided that wouldn't go over well at all. Instead he tried, "What'd y'have in mind?" his voice only carrying the faintest hint of confusion.