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 Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 4:06 pm
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 4:51 pm
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 5:10 pm
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 6:11 pm
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 8:43 pm
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reflection_of_static13 well, there's no worse way than just getting it out and over with. if she's your mom, she'll at least try to be sympathetic, the worst that could happen could be a simple misunderstanding, which you could clear up easily. be reassuring that it's what you are, and let yourself know that this is just simply informing, it shouldn't change your relationship with your mom, or at least you shouldn't let it. i mean, she should love you, so there's little that can happen to change that relationship
Oh gods if only you knew my mother.
She freaks out at just about every little thing I do differently. And being a lesbian -- pretty different!!
A few years ago (before I went all out lesbian) I dated this guy. He was bisexual and my mother hated it. She told me that I couldn't be with him multiple (every day) times.
I'm just mainly afraid that...she'll disown me. She's the kind of person who'd do that. She's that crazy. But, if that happens, I'll always be able to move in with my girlfriend...
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 8:51 pm
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Purple Twin-L reflection_of_static13 well, there's no worse way than just getting it out and over with. if she's your mom, she'll at least try to be sympathetic, the worst that could happen could be a simple misunderstanding, which you could clear up easily. be reassuring that it's what you are, and let yourself know that this is just simply informing, it shouldn't change your relationship with your mom, or at least you shouldn't let it. i mean, she should love you, so there's little that can happen to change that relationship
Oh gods if only you knew my mother.
She freaks out at just about every little thing I do differently. And being a lesbian -- pretty different!!
A few years ago (before I went all out lesbian) I dated this guy. He was bisexual and my mother hated it. She told me that I couldn't be with him multiple (every day) times.
I'm just mainly afraid that...she'll disown me. She's the kind of person who'd do that. She's that crazy. But, if that happens, I'll always be able to move in with my girlfriend...
hmm, that is a problem, but we do have that fear. my aunt, who's like my mom considering she's gone, reacted less than ideally. she questioned it constantly as if it was questioning everything she believed in and to this day she thinks of it as a phase. i'm saying that when faced with contradiction, she's probably not going to disown you although it is a legitimate fear i admit, which is probably the reason you're putting a lot of thought into this. there are some other ways if you want to avoid the whole "face to face reaction" part, where you wait in that awkward moment trying to see what your mom's reaction will be, anticipating, fearing. i avoided that by leaving a letter addressed to my aunt overnight in a place she'd see it, at a time i wouldn't. sure, it may be a bit of a chicken way, but it does relieve some of the stress. |
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 9:12 pm
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 9:35 pm
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reflection_of_static13 hmm, that is a problem, but we do have that fear. my aunt, who's like my mom considering she's gone, reacted less than ideally. she questioned it constantly as if it was questioning everything she believed in and to this day she thinks of it as a phase. i'm saying that when faced with contradiction, she's probably not going to disown you although it is a legitimate fear i admit, which is probably the reason you're putting a lot of thought into this. there are some other ways if you want to avoid the whole "face to face reaction" part, where you wait in that awkward moment trying to see what your mom's reaction will be, anticipating, fearing. i avoided that by leaving a letter addressed to my aunt overnight in a place she'd see it, at a time i wouldn't. sure, it may be a bit of a chicken way, but it does relieve some of the stress.
Hm, I may write her a letter...leave it on the coffee table before go to school...and I'm so sorry about your mother... |
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 9:36 pm
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Poise N Death There's the stereo typical way "Mom, I have something important to tell you, and I really want you to understand me. I love you, and I don't want to keep secrets from you. I know this may shock you, but I need to be me, and let you know who "me" is. I am a lesbian" Etc. Or there's blunt. "Mom, I love you. I'm lesbian." Maybe phrase that one a bit differently. Bring it up slowly, when she's had a good day. It'll obviously be big news.
I think I'd be a little too horrified to try either.
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 9:53 pm
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Purple Twin-L Poise N Death There's the stereo typical way "Mom, I have something important to tell you, and I really want you to understand me. I love you, and I don't want to keep secrets from you. I know this may shock you, but I need to be me, and let you know who "me" is. I am a lesbian" Etc. Or there's blunt. "Mom, I love you. I'm lesbian." Maybe phrase that one a bit differently. Bring it up slowly, when she's had a good day. It'll obviously be big news.
I think I'd be a little too horrified to try either.
The letter idea is a good one too. I'm sorry you're mother is like that, to make you feel like this about coming out. My mom,s comfortable, I just don't like the way she publicizes everything I tell her. So I don't tell her much. Whatever way you think is best, or get a good friend who knows (Unsure if you've told any of your friends) or something like that |
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 9:57 pm
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Purple Twin-L reflection_of_static13 hmm, that is a problem, but we do have that fear. my aunt, who's like my mom considering she's gone, reacted less than ideally. she questioned it constantly as if it was questioning everything she believed in and to this day she thinks of it as a phase. i'm saying that when faced with contradiction, she's probably not going to disown you although it is a legitimate fear i admit, which is probably the reason you're putting a lot of thought into this. there are some other ways if you want to avoid the whole "face to face reaction" part, where you wait in that awkward moment trying to see what your mom's reaction will be, anticipating, fearing. i avoided that by leaving a letter addressed to my aunt overnight in a place she'd see it, at a time i wouldn't. sure, it may be a bit of a chicken way, but it does relieve some of the stress. Hm, I may write her a letter...leave it on the coffee table before go to school...and I'm so sorry about your mother...
it's alright, but it's something to consider if your main fear is the face-face thing |
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 9:57 pm
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 9:59 pm
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 10:01 pm
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Purple Twin-L Poise N Death The letter idea is a good one too. I'm sorry you're mother is like that, to make you feel like this about coming out. My mom,s comfortable, I just don't like the way she publicizes everything I tell her. So I don't tell her much. Whatever way you think is best, or get a good friend who knows (Unsure if you've told any of your friends) or something like that
I'm actually out to everyone except my older brother, my grandparents, my mom and her boyfriend. It really sucks because I have to hide who I am because it makes me ashamed of being a lesbian and I don't want to be ashamed. I want to be able to be proud of who I am and not be afraid of being judged by anyone...
For sure. You are a wonderful person, and should thought of as one. So what if you like women? That's what makes you happy, and makes you, you. Your family ought to love you for you, and not a lie right?
Coming out to them won't be easy, and there'll probably be questions, but you'll feel better for it. Bring a friend who knows if you leave a letter, to be your rock. Stuff like that |
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 10:12 pm
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