Personal Story

[DebonaireNerd]

((this is based on true events, with some fiction thrown in. its also based on a rp i am currently creating as a one x one))
My mouth opened in surprise, I could feel myself standing their in the middle of the worn out studio i've been working on for about 16 years, i had been working their for over 3 years and i could feel all the eyes in room on me but i felt something else, something trickling down my face which is inflamed with heat. could it be tears, blood, sweat. but what happened. what did i say she thought but what had she said. she couldn't think straight but she saw the pain in partner eyes, the pain that constricted his expression, it felt like one of those movies where their whole life passed through their eyes and they were moving in slow motion. "I....." was all I could say and I turned around on my heels and took off. not caring if it was burning hot outside and i was wearing a heavy winter coat, not caring if i was a complete and utter disaster. my hands reached out and grasped cold metal and I forced my eyes opened, taking deep breaths of hot and salty air. I realized at that moment i was standing near the seaside.

Slowly as I looked at the waves as they crashed against the rocks of the shore. I allowed my eyes to shut as words started to form in my head. I was back in the studio, we were in a middle of a photo shoot. Tosuka was sitting their at the edge of the tables, his long legs carefully placed on the floor. his skin was still slick from the sweat from his run with the rest of his bandmates but his expression was pained. "Shouldn't we cancel the shoot today, you need a chance to rest. you haven't slept in 3 days." I said my voice sounding with an annoying whine in my voice it was such a habit that i needed to break but i couldn't help it. "I'm fine, Deci." he said his voice smooth like silk but still having that rough tone that i loved. "But." i was about to say something but he cut me off as he continued you the shoot. i blinked realizing my memories were moving faster and faster and then it stopped, and i blinked feeling a burn on the side of my cheek. he had slapped me i realized, his eyes going from that blue to a very dark color. "You can't tell me what to do, you are my partner. not my agent or my manager. you will do what i say, when i say it." his voice was firm and very cold. he was staring at me a dark look in those eyes that I loved so much. "Got it!" he shouted and then i felt my mouth open as they words from before came flooding out my mouth. "No! I don't Got It!. I am here to help you, I am here to make sure you alright, that's why i'm your partner, that's why i am here. you do not talk to me like i'm some dirt or gum at the bottom of your shoes. this is whole the reason why Shiro had died, because of your reckless behavior, maybe you should have died instead of him!" my words died out echoing through my head and I forced my eyes open dropping to my knees and gasping, i never thought i would say anything like that to him. to the one i loved.

"Seems you said something pretty bad." a voice said from behind me, it was familiar. it had a deep husky tone, much the same way Tosuka was. but their was this sweetness that brought me back. remembering Shiro and the way he used to come after me, when we have a fight or something. "Yea, i guess so." I muttered softly as I turned around and i could feel my mouth drop open again, the male was tall with toned muscles and a handsome jawline. his hair was dark black and straight hanging over the side of his ears but still a bit mess as if he had just woken up, but the eyes were the one that drew me, those deep green eyes that drew me in so many times. "Shiro." I asked sounding doubtful, he had died in a car crash over 2 years ago and i still had the scar running along the back of my neck and around my waist to prove it. "The one and only." he said grinning at me, he was wearing a simple dress shirt and slacks, but i did notice the dark blood stain on the front of the shirt the same area where the bullet had hit him. "Aren't you supposed to be...." i muttered but the last word was cut off. "Dead, yea i am." he said rolling his eyes. "But then how am i." i was about to asked but he walked up to me brushing his fingers through my curls. i could feel him well not really, he felt like the wind was running through me. "Well you need help. lets say your having an out of body experience." he said motioning his head to the side and I turned seeing my body laying on the ground, i felt lifeless and airless. "I'm not dead." I asked the whining tone coming back to my words. "No."he said softly and moved me out as my life started in reverse  

[DebonaireNerd]

I stood their watching as my life passed through my eyes. i did get a glimpse at my body before it pulled away. someone was standing next to me and my heart skipped a weak beat, Tosuka he was standing their. he probably thought i was dead or something. I turned towards Shiro who wrapped an arm around my shoulder. then all of sudden like a train as it pulled into a station, it jerked to a stop and i looked around, we were back at the old arena in Tokyo. "I remember this, this was how we met." I breathed looking around and smiled as I noticed he was standing on the stage, sweat running down his face and a worn out expression on his face. "I never asked, why he was so exhausted that night." I asked glancing towards Shiro. "He lost his older sister, an hour right before the concert, it tore through him like a knife. he kind of lost his strength but he didn't want to let the fans down so he kept going." Shiro said looking at me.

I was amazed at the fact that he had pushed through her death so quickly, and even continued with the show even though he was exhausted. I sighed as time sped up again and i was standing backstage during the show. I looked back at Shiro just as i did that same night and walked across the stage almost mimicking my memories actions, i smiled as i wrapped my arms around him, feeling him shake the same way he did that night. "Who are you, what are you doing up here." he asked glancing at me through half shut eyes, "I'm just a friend, and i'm here to help you." I said softly and looked at him as he nodded his head and turned his head back towards the audience and continued the song until it was done, he was leaning against me, and even this was still just a memory i could still feel his warmth. feeling Shiro's hand against my back I stepped back allowing my memory self to take over as I watched the events take place  

[DebonaireNerd]

I sighed watching the memories pass by me and i reached my hand stopping it in its track. Shiro blinked in surprise as he noticed the memory and stepped off our train of sorts. "What memory is this." Shiro asked sounding confused. "You weren't their that night, but Tosuka's heart had stopped and this is when we had thought he was dead for almost 2 years. it was the first night of me actually being on my own without him." I said feeling tears come to my eyes and roll down my cheeks hitting the floor with soft plops and i sighed softly as I looked down  

[DebonaireNerd]

Shiro watched me a dark look in his eyes, "Did he ever come back." he asked sounding confused as he slipped his arm around me to comfort me. I sighed as i nodded my head and reached out brushing my hand against it so the memory would speed up again and smiled as I saw myself performing one of my favorite songs as the crowds cheered and screamed both mine and Tosuka's name. I noticed myself eye's widening i noticed that Tosuka standing in the crowd, he was wearing the same worn down leather oufit that he worn today and i found myself grinning. "He completely shocked the entire band. it took us 3 days to try to get things together again." she said leaning his head her head back and smiled as she closed her eyes