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Okay, here's the deal, all year, I've known that this is coming.... That I'm gonna cross the stage, get my diploma, and not return to my high school until the 10 year reunion (unless I visit my friends, but after all the threats and bombings this year, Idk if that's possible). I've been nostalgic all year, but it's really setting in.... My ex bf/friend, Drew, is taking it really hard (he's a junior), my family is getting progressively more excited, and even though I'm excited to finally finish high school and start my adult life, every time I think about it, I wanna cry.... I know, it's an accomplishment, and to celebrate, I'm going to Ireland for 3 weeks after I graduate, and not too long after I get back from Ireland, I turn 18 and get my driver's license and a car.... But, even though I'm getting gifts, and praise, and all sorts of other stuff, it breaks my heart to know that I won't be seeing my friends as much as I used to anymore.... I've been doing my best to spend time with everyone, by going to prom, having a Halloween party, having a Christmas party, doing a video for my school's film festival, and going to Austin with a friend over Spring Break, but it still hurts... Not to mention the fact that I've found myself to still be in love with Drew, and my friends and I all think that he still loves me...
I'm afraid that some of my friends won't be okay without someone like me to be at the school for them, so I'm worried that they'll be okay next year.... If Drew and I do get back together, I'm afraid that, even though I'm staying in my town for a while, he and I won't be able to see each other.... And I'm just a bit scared because I know that I wanna travel the world, and see the universe, but Idk which of my strengths I'm gonna use that will allow me to do that....
If anyone could give me at least a sliver of advice on how to deal with the looming heartbreak that is creeping into me, I'd be really grateful!
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