|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Mon May 20, 2013 1:07 pm
 |
|
|
 |
'I'm sorry.'
Vatsa had to say that first. His heart hurt and swelled at the sight of her; she was here so he was happy, but she was upset and he felt that he had done that, so his heart was giving him pain.
'I'm sorry Tirla. I rushed you, I showed what was on my mind and in my heart too soon, and I'm sorry for that.'
He gave the smallest of steps forward, not wanting her to run away, fearing pushing too much again, but hoping that the fact that she hadn't completely vanished from the area, that she had come over to him meant that for now she wouldn't.
'Will you forgive me, forgive my eagerness? I don't want to hurt you, I never want to see your tears again. If you all ever want from me is to be far away I'll accept it, I will, though it'll hurt to do so. I just want..to see you smile.'
|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon May 20, 2013 1:37 pm
|
|
|
|
Tirla's heart aches at the pain in his voice. He had done nothing wrong. She was a mess and he had saved her, both her body and her heart. And here he stood, apologizing.
Shaking her head firmly, she takes a single step back. "No. No, I can not forgive you. I . . ." Tirla half turns her head away.
"You didn't do anything wrong. I . . . I can not forgive you for being wonderful. Don't ask me to. I . . ."
Not knowing what else to say, she lowers her head as she steps forward, hesitantly brushing it against his neck. Her voice thick with emotion, "I . . . I can't promise not to be a silly mare, to not hurt you. But . . . I don't want to have you far away. I . . ."
Her sigh is deep and heartfelt before she moves to look up into his eyes. "I'm sorry I ran. I . . . I don't know how to say the words that I'm feeling. But . . . there is no freedom on the wind now. I . . . "
Tirla looks away again, searching for a way to say what she had discovered in herself as she flew. Only one thing comes to mind, though she isn't sure it will carry her meaning, she says it with an innocent pain. "I lost your flower. I . . . I tried to catch it, but I lost it. I . . . I didn't know what to do."
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon May 20, 2013 2:32 pm
|
|
|
|
Vatsa's face falls, and heart sinks at her first words - of course a tiny part expected her not, but it was so small he'd not wanted to liste..wait what? She'd carried on talking, and these words lifted his head and made his heart soar higher than Tirla's wings could carry her.
He curled around her, almost holding his breath for fear of shattering the moment, afraid of her bolting, afraid that this would turn about to be a lovely dream that he would soon have to wake from. He felt her against him though, and that was no dream.
'And I can't promise not to want you to be a part of my life, can't promise not to find you precious, each and every day..' he nudged her gently, his eyes full of warmth and feeling as he looked at Tirla.
'You didn't lose it.' he said, smiling, taking a moment to turn, to pluck the flower from its place in his tail braid, putting it back where it belonged, nestled behind her ear once more.
'It's always going to be right with you.'
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon May 20, 2013 3:07 pm
|
|
|
|
Tirla stills as Vatsa wraps himself around her. She isn't accustomed to being touched, at all. And this was more than just being touched, this was . . . was this love?
Not sure if it was or not, Tirla lays her head along his back, feeling his warmth. It wasn't something that she would mind getting used to. But his words, promising without promising, but giving her such wonder. She struggled to understand what was happening.
Since her mother's death, Tirla had avoided others. She feared being attacked as her mother was, at least in her conscious mind. But a part of her feared even deeper, losing someone she cared about. She couldn't recognize that part, but it was there, and it was slowly melting away in the face of Vatsa's presence.
Then, beyond all reason, he had the flower. If it was a little battered for the wear, she didn't notice or mind. Somehow it was more than a flower. In that moment, it was an offering of love. And she could feel that the flower itself wasn't as important as the stallion who gave it. It was just a symbol. And she hoped with a fierce intensity she hadn't know she was capable of, that it would indeed always be right with her.
Stepping back, she wasn't sure how to answer the gesture, until she remembered the deep purple flower on the boulder. Without saying a word, she walks back across the clearing. Reaching in among the vines, past the blue flowers, she pulls out the purple bell-shaped blossom.
Suddenly shy, Tirla drops her head as she turns back to him. It was silly, stallions didn't wear flowers. Now she wasn't sure what to do. A hesitant step towards him and she stalls.
Then, deciding she would rather be silly than there forever with this flower in her mouth, she moves back to Vatsa. She has to reach slightly to tuck her present behind his ear, but a sweet and shy smile touches her face once she has done so.
Nuzzling his neck, Tirla finds her voice again. "I'm glad for the rain." She still didn't have the right words, but she shared the ones she had.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu May 23, 2013 7:16 am
|
|
|
|
Vatsa felt giddy, so very giddy. It was as if everything had finally slotted into place for him - he wanted to run, and jump and skip, and shout..but mostly he wanted to keep that all in check and just quietly love and cherish Tirla so that she didn't feel pressure and wouldn't run again.
When she stepped away from him, there was a little falling feeling, but she didn't go far, and her expression didn't read panic so he told himself to trust, trust that she could feel what he felt for her, and she was slowly accepting him and those feelings. He smiled when she came back to him, seeing the flower, seeing that she was gifting it to him and when she reached up to tuck it in the same place that she was wearing hers he dipped his head slightly to meet hers.
'I know..' he murmured, a gentle pleasurable shiver running along his spine at the warm touch to his neck.
'I'll forever be thankful for that night of horrible weather. It gave me such a wonderful, if not a little wet, gift.' he chuckled softly.
'Thank you for not leaving me Tirla. You've made me feel, well, more than I can say with words. I won't pressure or push..I'll just be - here.'
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu May 23, 2013 9:21 am
|
|
|
|
Tirla shakes her head, swallowing hard. Tears p***k at her eyes as she speaks softly, "But I did. I left. I . . . I was wrong. But . . . you found me. I . . . "
She looks down, afraid to meet his gaze. "I don't understand any of this, Vatsa. The sky is there, open and free. But . . . when I left, when I . . . Why did it hurt? Like I was losing something precious . . . I . . . I just know I don't want to fly away from you. But I'm still . . . I'm afraid."
Tirla's voice trails away with the admission and a visible shiver runs down her spine. She's almost afraid to touch him, not sure what caused or if she was comfortable with all the changes that happened to her just in the past night. Somehow she is both glad for those changes, and terrified of them. Terrified both of getting too close to this stallion, and of losing him. And at this point, she knows that leaving Vatsa isn't an option she's comfortable with.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon May 27, 2013 2:10 pm
|
|
|
|
'You didn't, some part of you stayed with me..that's why you couldn't fly away completely.' Vatsa said softly.
'I can't explain it properly though, it's something you have to work out for yourself. The sky is there for you, it's always there, and I don't want to stop you from flying, I never would.' he nudged her gently, trying to get her to look at him.
'It hurt, I am hoping, because you feel something for me. The same something that I feel for you. But I want you to speak, or show it in your own time. And I don't want you to afraid. There is nothing to fear.' he smiled, giving her little nudges but also trying not to crowd her. It was a fine line.
'I hope you'll see that what you could have, with me, is a thing worth having in your life. That you can trust me. And that I'll be there for you..'
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue May 28, 2013 8:39 am
|
|
|
|
Tirla takes a deep breath and looks up into Vatsa's eyes through half lowered lids. She shivers slightly as their eyes meet, hers fluttering, almost closing, then meeting his again.
"I . . . I haven't trusted anyone but me in . . . I've been on my own, taken care of myself. I never . . . I never had anyone who cared if I got lost or flew away. I . . . I could go anywhere and do anything."
She lowers her head, "But now, if I don't come back . . . I don't want to hurt you. I . . ." Tirla's voice is mournful as she speaks from her heart, "Why can't you have wings?! Why can't I just . . . I could share the sky with you. I could . . . we would be free together."
A shake of her head as she turns slightly away, her voice falling to a whisper, "But I do . . . I want you in my life." She looks up into his eyes again, taking a step forward to nuzzle into his neck. "The first time I saw you, I thought you looked like the night sky. I . . . Being with you, it's like a new kind of flying. But . . . a kind I don't know. I . . . I feel like I'm falling. And I don't know how to stop."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 18, 2013 11:17 am
|
|
|
|
'But you don't have to live the rest of your life that way, it's okay to need someone once in a while.' Vatsa replied softly.
'It doesn't make one weak, or needy.'
He listened as she spoke on, shaking his head a little before he answered.
'That's the way life is. If I could sprout wings for you, I would. But that's the one thing I cannot do. I can offer you companionship, and when you are ready to accept it, love, but that's all. If it can't be enough for you, I will understand.'
He smiled as she looked up at him, his eyes gentle as he returned the look. He knew she was trying to work through her reticence about being with him, and whilst he would accept whatever she decided, he was still hopeful.
'I want you in mine, but that you already know..do you want to stop falling? I'll catch you..if you let me.'
LydaLynn Sorry for the slow reply, sort of wore out my muse for Vatsa I think XD
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 18, 2013 2:25 pm
|
|
|
|
Tirla stands still, laying her head along Vatsa's neck, her eyes closed. Drinking in the scent of him, she only breaths for a long moment. Finally, knowing he was waiting, she speaks. Her voice is soft, she doesn't move.
"I don't know, Vatsa. I . . . is that okay? For now, anyway. I just . . . I know you said you thought you'd found love before. I . . . I don't want to hurt you. But I want to know that . . . that I can do this, before . . . before I promise anything."
With her eyes closed, Tirla can feel the emotion pricking at her eyes, but no tears escape. "I've never been afraid to fall before. I could always catch myself. I . . . For this, I have to . . . I need to learn to trust. I just . . . that's what scares me. I've never . . . I've never had anyone I could trust before. I want to, but . . . it's all happening so fast."
Finally she pulls back and again moves to look him in the eyes, hers fluttering for a moment before finding focus. "I want to stay. To try. I . . . I don't know that I could do anything else now."
CitrusCupcake I understand, no worries.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 12:48 pm
|
|
|
|
Vatsa nibbled gently at Tirla's mane as she rested against his neck, enjoying the warm press of her against himself, hoping that it would a oft repeated experience. He would be patient though and he nodded.
'Don't worry about me. Take your time. Think about what you feel, and what you think. You know my thoughts, my feelings.' he chuckled a little, a and gentle rumbling sound in his chest.
'So you know that I'll be here, whatever you decide. Friend or more..I'll be here.' he said. Vatsa felt that if she knew stability in her life, that her heart would be able open, that she'd felt safe to trust in someone else.
'How about we walk for a while? Just a bit of a stroll, talk about other things. Enjoy the day? Would you want to do that?' he suggested, looking for a way to get her to relax, take the pressure of herself.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Jun 27, 2013 1:40 pm
|
|
|
|
Honestly, Tirla was parched. For all that she'd been standing next to the stream, she hadn't actually taken a drink. And she'd had a headlong, panicked flight, a cry, and a confusing search of mind and heart. But . . . she didn't know how to say she wanted something as base as a drink of water.
After all, here Vatsa was and she could feel her heart opening to him. If he wanted something as simple as a walk through the trees, she was more than willing to join him in that. And they would be walking along the stream. Of course . . . drinking water wasn't the most flattering angle to be viewed from.
Tirla wasn't sure where that last thought came from, or why she cared. She blinks and she realizes she is being more than a little silly, just standing there, staring at the stallion as he waited for her answer. She was thirsty. She was fairly certain Vatsa would understand.
"Um . . . actually, I'm a bit . . . I could use some water, if you don't mind waiting? I mean . . . I can wait a bit, I just . . . we're here and . . . " She trails off with a sigh. Why couldn't she talk around him?! She had never had these problems before.
Giving a slight shake to her head, Tirla steps to the edge of the water and extended her neck. Head down, she drinks slowly, trying not to make a fool of herself.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jul 08, 2013 9:34 pm
|
|
|
|
Vatsa was honestly surprised that Tirla was asking to stop and take a drink, and took a moment to answer out of his surprise. Then he smiled and nodded.
'Of course! Take as much time as you need. In fact, I'll take a drink myself..' he went over to the stream, he did need a drink but he thought it might make her feel at ease also, his hooves sank slightly in the mud of the bank, his tail swishing gently, flicking away an errant fly as he took a long drink.
The water cooled nose and mouth in a pleasant way, and a moment later he straightened, shaking out his mane, and patiently and quietly waiting for Tirla to be ready to move.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
