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Posted: Thu Jul 30, 2009 8:12 pm
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"I certainly hope so, most leaders seem so confident and I try to be, but sometimes I wonder if I'm not doing it all wrong." He chuckled and looked at her with a soft smile. "Like speaking with you...many males would say I was a fool for not putting you in your place...but...I find it foolish to try and bend your will, I would much rather be honest with you and have you honestly come to trust me."
He sat back up slowly his fatigue fading slowly. "My first female was beautiful her pelt was thick and rich a beautiful ebony that shone in moonlight or sunlight. I captured her for my coming of age quest, she was slender but fierce. I tried to reason with her...and then my father suggested that I use a bit more force. The first time she lashed out at me I returned the gesture in kind. At first it felt good, to see her finally quiet...I suppose she really didn't think I would hurt her. The feeling only lasted a few moments...I disliked seeing her in pain even more then I disliked feeling my own pain. She was completely Kajira...couldn't be left alone...she tried to run...and was put down." His voice was tinged with bitterness and his eyes had hardened again, chips of ice, unseeing only focused within. Slowly he relaxed and a small smile softened his features.
"But I had Aysel by then...I had captured her as well...but not the same way. I saw her hunting...she was beautiful, but the thought of another rebellious Kajira was too much for me. I leapt but I couldn't just knock her out, I couldn't force her back, I wanted her to want me...and she did...it was a slow adjustment but no one would ever notice that she wasn't a born Banu." He chuckled softly.
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 10:08 pm
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Another shy response was his answer to his words, though she certainly appreciated his more gentle approach. "Please excuse me if it isn't my place to say, I'm not sure since I've never led anything before myself, but it seems like being true to yourself would be the best course to confident leadership, rather than trying to emulate others, though I do understand..." She replied softly, watching him. "As long as you make decisions to the best of your ability, and look after the ones you're charged to protect, isn't that all that anyone can ask of you?"
Of course, from what she saw he seemed to be doing fine, and as she said, she'd never led a thing a day in her life.
"I'm sure that if you continue on that path you'll have nothing to worry about, I mean." She amended, not wanting him to think that she meant to say he wasn't doing just that. Her ears flattened lightly against her head as he recounted the tale of his first banu, then, hoping, silently praying that that wouldn't some day be Lela. The girl could be so willful sometimes, though she was normally so sweet, but she had gotten her mother's temper more and more over the months, even if it was rare to show itself.
Hearing him speak of Aysel was encouraging, though, it truly did sound as if he loved her, but Taja couldn't help but wonder-- if those feelings were mutual, how could you want to share your lover with anyone else, let alone several other "anyone else"'s? She was very curious to speak to Aysel indeed. She was genuinely curious to find out how the other gender delt with such things, and someone that was happy with the lifestyle was definitely going to be the best choice. Aysel could, perhaps, give her another way of looking at it besides "having" to share.
This wasn't to say that Tajamala was the selfish type either, that didn't know how to share, she had simply always seen couples in single pairs. Had they been allowed their travels perhaps she would have met some such as those of the Achana, who believed in free love, whose leaders themselves were in a three mating. Perhaps in time she would have had the chance to chat with others who felt the same way as this pride, but the journey had been cut short before truly beginning and so she truly didn't know, from lack of experience, so needless to say she had a great deal that she could learn from Aysel. She was eager to begin, even as she thought she may be starting to understand some on her own.
She wanted to know Aali better, even though she still felt a bit uncertain on if he'd still be this kind once he had gotten her trust and cooperation, but he already had her word to stay and he hadn't changed his behavior yet, so maybe she really did worry for nothing.
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 10:24 pm
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Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 11:06 pm
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Posted: Sat Aug 01, 2009 8:49 am
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