Ask Xander!

[Xander Tarbert]

Mothers know when they breed a monster.

Or, maybe it's both a nature/nurture thing. There are a few genetic reasons why people can't identify the fact other people are, well, people as well. And this is reinforced by the fact their mother, who has the same condition, treats them like s**t.  

[Cassandra022]

would you rather have a food replicator or a teleportation pad?  

[Xander Tarbert]

Once you have one, the other comes free of charge. The technology's the same.  

[Alyka]

Ugh, why do I keep gettin these migraines?  

[Xander Tarbert]

Too much stimulation during the day, perhaps. Or blood flow problem in your brain.

Or just not enough Zelda.  

[Alyka]

I'm wearing a Zelda shirt today - And no migraine! You're a genius, Xander.

But in reality, I think it was an allergic reaction to something I had been eating.  

[Cassandra022]

Whats your favorite thing to order at chinese place?  

[Xander Tarbert]

Orange Chicken. It be yummy.  

[Raganui Minamoto]

What is love?  

[Xander Tarbert]

According to this, 'Love' is making a shot to the knees of a target 120 kilometers away using an Aratech sniper rifle with a tri-light scope. This definition, I am told, is subject to interpretation. Obviously, love is a matter of odds. Not many meatbags could make such a shot, and fewer would derive love from it. Yet for me, love is knowing your target, putting them in your targeting reticle, and together, achieving a singular purpose, against statistically long odds.  

[Cassandra022]

how come some people stalk their ex's and others do not?  

[Elspeth Telrunya]

what happens if you are scared half to death twice?  

[Xander Tarbert]

Why are you asking me that? Has she said something? Look, just because I wait outside her window all night just to watch her sleep doesn't mean I'm stalking her. And I only went through her trash twice, ok? The other five times it was a raccon and I think if I can't check what she's not eating then it doesn't count. Wait, what was the question again? Oh, uh, because some people just don't have the connestion her and I do.

Well then you should hit this person. Very, very hard. Because they're trying to kill you.  

[Raganui Minamoto]

What is the best way to slaughter your enemy?  

[Xander Tarbert]

By using Bruce Campbell to kill them. Any use of him will do. Having him kill them with a chainsaw, having him shoot them... Hell, pick him up and club the person to death with Bruce Campbell. It's all good.