[PRP] Thinking Differently (Mathias/Jove)

[Grey Dragon]

Jove never had a best friend before.

He had made lots of friends during his time at Amityville. His veterinarian would call him 'well socialized', he knew his manners and appropriate behaviour for interacting with others, and there were many people who liked him. He even had a brother, who he loved very much even if he was never able to admit it.

But now he found himself in a situation where there was someone special in his life. Someone his own age, with similar interests, and no need to posture or puff up or pretend he was something other than himself. And he found himself thinking about this special person often.

And that was what led him to this moment, walking across campus with a fierce blush on his cheeks, and a piece of paper folded up and clenched tight in one hand. His hair, usually fluffy and haphazardly styled, had been brushed nicely, the bangs on one side pinned back with a pair of cute barrettes. They had been a gift, as was the cute, pink sun dress he wore, with just enough feminine frills and skulls and flowers to make a ghoul happy. His knee-high white stockings and cute shoes with pink bows completed the illusion.

Somehow he had been masterfully done up as a pretty young ghoul dressed for the sunny, spring weather.

He had hoped to find his friend in the monster dorms, but there was no reply when he knocked on the door... so he had been forced to go out and search. Ten minutes of wandering the campus and Jove was starting to think it was best to abandon this foolish idea, but then he spotted Mathias sitting under a tree with a book and pencil.

Jove steeled himself for the encounter, and then calmly walked over to see what his friend's reaction would be.  

[Seussi]

It was a relatively nice day, the air crisp and cool but promising slightly more warmth in the months to come. But Mathias, despite this better weather fortune, was feeling absolutely miserable. In his natural form, he was beginning to shed, his skin itching constantly as the white fur of the colder Octobers began to fall out, replaced once more by his natural colors of silver-grey and light brown. On top of this, while his antlers continued to grow, the skin around where they protruded was often irritated as well, and he had to fight not to scratch at it with long claws. His student form gave him relief from one problem, though often his ears twitched and he found himself scratching them at their base. They were mottled in coloration, white in patches but becoming more silver by the day.

He had needed a distraction. And so, since it was a fairly nice day, he had taken one of his word puzzle books and gone outside, finding a nice tree to park his fluffy rear under, determined to concentrate on something that could take his mind off of the itch, and the irritation, both mental and physical. He had been at it for at least thirty minutes before an interruption came, and he had been doing good. He was lost in a world of difficult words and meanings.

He was aware of somebodies arrival only by a glimpse of movement out of the corner of his eye, rather then by scent or sound. His ears stood up to attention, and he automatically sniffed at the air, finding a faded scent but one he recognized still, and he relaxed before turning, lifting red eyes while already beginning to speak.

"Guten tag, Jove! How are---" He stopped, his eyes widening as at first, what he was seeing filtered through his eyes and into his brain. It was not what he was expecting, not at all, and his first thought was that he had been wrong. This wasn't Jove. This was a ghoul. Jove was a boil. Jove was safe, and this wasn't safe. This was....

....This was confusing. There was a familiar feeling of warmth, and a desire that was merely a shadow of what it was normally when he was in the presence of a ghoul. It was a feeling of...attraction, certainly, and that only made what was happening seem all the more awkward, and embarrassing and when he spoke again, his voice came out quite a bit more strangled.

"Was machtst du??"

Grey Dragon

 

[Grey Dragon]

Jove's fluffy tail wagged when Mathias noticed him there. The first sign for many of his friends was immediate attention, looking up, turning to him, and then realizing who was there. Ren was the best at guessing, but, like Jove, the wolpertinger used his nose. Jove was never certain what his friend was sniffing for, maybe the absence of scent, but that expression of recognition always made the pup happy.

But the happy feeling didn't linger, because the moment Matty's expression changed, Jove was reminded of his rather unusual apparel. The glowing blush spread across his cheeks, but he forced himself to ignore his embarrassment just in case...

His brows furrowed. Mathias was... staring. Not worshipping or grovelling just yet, but he definitely was staring. Speechless even. Jove bit his lip, did it look that ridiculous?

Rather than sitting on the ground next to Mathias, he stood there awkwardly, waiting for some kind of clear indication. What he got was anything but. His head tilted slightly, sometimes he could remember things Matty said in his own language, but this was entirely unfamiliar to the pup.

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[Seussi]

He had no idea how to react, what to say, what to even do. It was his friend, Jove, and he knew that, but dressed the way he was, he looked so very feminine, so much like an actual ghoul, that there was a mental struggle to contend with as well. Feelings that he was sure he shouldn't be having. A desire that he did not want to give in to, knowing that no, this was not a ghoul, it was a boil. A boil.

He was breathing a little bit heavily, and should have just closed his eyes, should have just looked away, but he couldn't. It was like he was destined to be stuck like this, trapped in this mental conundrum that forced his instincts to debate the proper course of action. Get on his knee's and grovel? Laugh at Jove's ridiculous state and give him a head butt in the stomach for putting him through this? The latter sounded pretty damn appropriate, given the situation.

But he just couldn't. Couldn't look away, couldn't find words. Jove definitely had no idea what he had already said, and he knew that. He knew it, and still he said nothing to explain himself.

Finally, after what seemed like ages, he did open his mouth to speak. He was going to ask again, only this time, in a language that his friend would understand. He was going to get this all sorted out.

"You look very pretty."

..............

Sheisse.

Grey Dragon

 

[Grey Dragon]

The pup was beginning to wonder if his friend was about to explode. There had to be words inside him, trapped somewhere they couldn't quite get out. Jove could see them fighting with each other, and wasn't sure whether this was a positive sign, or whether he had messed up poor Mathias all over again. Was this what 'catatonic' looked like?

Jove frowned and rubbed at the back of his neck, functionally the dress was no different from his nightshirt, and pinning back his bangs did make it easier to see, but he hadn't thought about being 'pretty' until the words spilled out of his friend's mouth. Suddenly it became almost more than Jove could stand, he began to blush even brighter. Perhaps more than he had ever blushed in front of Mathias, slightly pink and glowing visibly even in the bright pumpkin sunlight. He frowned almost reflexively, and looked away, fingers knotting nervously in front of him.

This was becoming more and more uncomfortable by the minute. And not because he was actually wearing a pretty dress made for a ghoul, but because... he might have liked having Mathias call him pretty. And if his friend had been battling with his thoughts, now the battle had spread to friendly territory. How could he not be confused, when anyone else calling him pretty would be promptly ignored forever?

Jove looked down at his feet, and glanced over to where Mathias was sitting. He didn't look up quite high enough to see his friend's face, just... look at where he was. How did one go about sitting down in a dress anyway?

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[Seussi]

Fortunately for Jove, Mathias was very unlikely to actually explode at this moment. Not literally, at least. Though his face was turning more red by the second and he did suddenly seem to be holding his breath, his mouth clamped up tight as though he feared what he might say next. He stayed like this for a good long time, refusing to breathe, pretty much willing himself to black out, because better that then speaking another word.

But it could not, and did not last. His breath was released in a loud woosh of air, and his shoulders slumped forward slightly, as though in shame, but unfortunately for the young wolpertinger, his head could not follow suit. He could not look down, or away. His gaze was riveted, dark red focused on glowing blue, unable to move even by the tiniest increment.

"Sheisse." He breathed out loud this time, and then began to utter, quite rapidly and without pause, everything he had been trying so desperately not to say.

"Du siehst wunderbar aus! Nien, nein...Du bist heiss und Du bist nicht nur an diesem Tag, sondern jeden Tag in meinen Gedanken. Du machst mich so glücklich! Ich habe so Sehnsucht nach dir. Du gefällst mir sehr...."

Grey Dragon

 

[Grey Dragon]

As far as Jove was concerned, that pretty much counted as exploding.

Thankfully the pup didn't know nearly enough to understand what his friend was saying, or he would have taken the confession as a product of Matty's natural impulse. He wouldn't have believed any of it, not dressed the way he was. The staring, the rapid speech... Jove tried not to look disappointed, it seemed like just the perception of a ghoul was able to throw his friend off, despite his knowledge to the contrary.

With a bit of a sigh Jove gave up on figuring out the 'proper' way to sit and just sat next to Mathias with as much grace as he could. He may have shown a little bit too much leg in the process, but it wasn't so hard. The folded and worried piece of paper was shoved into his friend's hands. Then he leaned closer, and covered Matty's eyes.

For a second, now that it was hidden from his friend's view, the disappointment showed on his face. It didn't work... And he had once again put Mathias through something awkward. The wolpertinger would have the right to be angry with him, having tested the waters again without warning. And Jove was pretty sure whatever Mathias said would have been embarrassing if it wasn't for the language barrier between them. Matty might not want to talk to him after that...

He had just felt so certain this would work...

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[Seussi]

It was a relief to say it, though completely and horrifyingly embarrassing. His face couldn't have been redder, and he was twisting his fingers together in distress, not only because of what was happening, but because he was also anxious over the reaction he would get. His brain was so muddled, it didn't even occur to him that Jove couldn't understand a word he was saying.

"Bitte! Du gefällst mir sehr! Bitte haben Sie Verständnis!" He gave Jove a pleading look as the boil sat down, reaching out with intention of placing a clawed hand on top of his friends, but instead finding a piece of paper shoved into his hands and his eyes covered half a second later.

"Please." He gripped the paper tight, fighting the urge to push that hand down away from his eyes, then took in a shaking breath and stopped, his mind beginning to clear again, though it had only been a thin haze to begin with, and the mortification of the situation washed through him again, fresh, burning, leaving him feeling raw and angry and frustrated and confused all at once.

He knew what he had said, and he knew now that it was unlikely that Jove had understood. Flinching back from the hand, he dropped his gaze down to his hands, to the paper, scowling, face still burning red.

But the anger he felt wasn't at Jove. It was at himself. It was because he never knew what feelings he had were real, and which were a lie. With Jove, he'd been sure he'd figured it all out, but now that would all be tainted by this moment, always remembered, and that would always make him wonder if he was being influenced by that memory.

He remained silent for a long time, gaze focused downward. When he finally spoke, his words were choked, quiet , and halting, as though he had trouble finding just what to say.

"Jove? Am...appreciating try of help. Vould not be mad vith. Am...am still...liking, too much. Is bad thing? Don't know if being friends vith is gut or nacht gut. Vill if still vanting" He wanted to look at his friends face when he said it, but knew it was a bad idea.

And then he took a deep breath, thinking through the next part more carefully, his words slower as he tried to say it all correctly.

"Because vas saying mostly truth before. Now not looking can say again, and hope meaning is not lost, and you are understanding. You are vonderful, and nice to see, and am thinking about you often. I am liking you very much. It made him feel warm and dizzy to say, his guy twisting uncomfortably with anxiety at the words. He didn't want to scare Jove away, but he only thought it fair that the boil should know.

He almost felt like apologizing immediately after saying it.

Or throwing up that seemed viable now as well.

Grey Dragon

 

[Grey Dragon]

Jove made a little noise, encompassing all of "it's okay," and "sit still," and "don't worry" in that one vocalization. He waited, resting his forehead against his friend's shoulder until the usual calm settled in. He could hear his friend's heart beat, but it hadn't yet gone back down completely when Mathias jerked away.

Jove sat up again, startled and unsure. The wolpertinger wasn't looking at him, but rather that piece of paper, still folded and crumpled. The silence stretched out between them. The pup thought perhaps it was over, he could feel the tenseness, and the anger and embarrassment although the source was left unsaid. At least at first. The pup tucked his feet closer to his body, white knee-highs feeling awkwardly constricting in the wrong places.

He was just about to reach around, into Matty's line of sight to point at the note, but then his friend started to speak. Remarkably it wasn't the broken language that Jove found hard to understand, but the meaning itself. Did it... really mean he had messed things up, and his friend couldn't be his friend anymore? He didn't want to make Mathias uncomfortable. But as he continued Jove felt a little bit of hope spark in him.

It was easy to say "still liking too much," but that was not exactly what Mathias was saying the second time. The emphasis was on... understanding? That he could say it without looking? Did he mean this "liking too much" had started even before this stupid dress idea?

Before he could stop it, Jove let out a little noise, somewhere between an anxious doggy pant and a whine. It was a desperately hopeful noise. He wanted Mathias to continue, just so he could be sure...

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[Seussi]

He wished Jove would say something. He wished he could look at him, see his expression. As it was, that sound meant very little to him, and in his current state of worry, his heart immediately plummeted as he jumped to the conclusion that the half-whine was to tell him to stop, to not ruin their friendship as it was already by making it more complicated. He understood, he did. It had just been only fair that Jove heard him say it. The feelings were still there, and they had been there before, though he'd tried to ignore them. The pull was still there as well, the need that had come with looking, though faded. It had been enough, and he had taken the opportunity presented to say it without chickening out.

But now he wondered if it had been a mistake.

"Am sorry, vas not meaning to...ve are still friends, nah? Vill not say such things anymore if making difficult. Maybe learning to like less, to think about less. Just needing time. Vill alvways think vonderful and nice to look at, though." He smiled a little, to himself, and lifted the paper.

"Vut is?"

Grey Dragon

 

[Grey Dragon]

Mathias had that tone in his voice. Sad, with a slightly wistful tone, if Jove was interpreting it correctly. It felt like a very one-sided admission. Matty was making assumptions too, and the conclusions didn't seem very happy... Pieces were starting to click, although the pup was still far from seeing the picture on the puzzle.

Taking a bit of a risk, Jove wrapped his arms around his friend in a hug, and pressed his forehead against Matty's shoulder. It was okay, they were still best friends. They were best friends and whatever else they happened to be, there was no way the wolpertinger could like him too much, much less break apart their friendship because of it.

"Never like less," Jove muttered quietly, his cheeks still glowing as he pressed his forehead against Matty's shoulder.

Ears perked when his friend finally began to investigate the piece of paper Jove had so nervously held onto all afternoon. He peeked over Matty's shoulder, and his tail curled up slightly in a wag.

When Mathias unfolded it, he would see a few simple doodles in coloured pencil. One figure looked suspiciously like Jove, with a fluffy blue tail and a pink dress. Next to it was an arrow pointing away from the first picture, and then another doodle of Jove in his usual outfit, with a dress drawn next to it. The second Jove had a smile on his face, even though the pup hardly ever smiled. But then below it was a very similar picture. This time it was very clearly a ghoul, with a dress and long hair, and then an arrow pointing to the same 'ghoul', drawn in pants and a shirt with a flat chest, and the curvy dress drawn separately.

Perhaps a picture was not worth a thousand words, but Jove showed no inclination to explain verbally.

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[Seussi]

The arms around him were a surprise, and he immediately stiffened, his first instinct to pull away from all of that sudden touch wrapped around his body. It only lasted a moment, however. A split second later he was relaxing, his smile growing, flashing teeth as he leaned into the hug, one hand leaving the paper to clasp on top of Jove's arm. There was a sense of relief, of knowing he hadn't screwed up completely. The twisting sensation in his gut seemed to ease, the dizziness of before passing with it, and when Jove pressed his forehead against Mathias's shoulder, he tilted his own head to the side to bump lightly against his friends.

And then he froze when Jove spoke. It was such a rare thing, to hear any amount of quiet words spoken by the ghost boil, that it could be no surprise that Mathias was startled by it, and he was sure his heart actually stopped beating for a moment, just until the initial shock wore off, and he could fully comprehend what Jove had just said.

Then his heart felt like it might have faltered again.

"Am not sure could if even trying." He murmured back in response, his own cheeks feeling quite warm again, though it was quite possible at this point that he was just in a state of perpetual blush.

Clearing his throat, he sat up straighter again to unfold the crumpled up paper that Jove had given him, careful to not accidentally tear it with his claws. He set it down to smooth out on his lap, head tilting to the side just slightly as he studied the images, one claw tracing over each.

He thought that he understood, and he also thought that it was quite clever. "Are thinking can trick mind." He said, giving his shoulders a small shrug. "Might be so. Vas very confused vith you, vas not so bad as vith ghouls who are more....obvious ghouls, who know are ghouls. Is not as bad vith ghouls who are looking more like boils or vith faces more hidden, like Helmut." He didn't usually discuss his...condition...much, if at all. It was probably quite telling of how much he had come to appreciate, and trust, his friend that he would so openly discuss it now.

Grey Dragonx

 

[Grey Dragon]

The tail made another soft thump against the ground. This was how it should be, they were too comfortable around each other to be walking on eggshells and stumbling over misunderstandings. He would be hesitant to admit it, had anyone actually confronted him about it, but Jove liked the warmth of Matty's body, and the way he could hear his friend's heart beating. Okay, so he liked that about anyone, but… not to the same extent. In most others it was merely an entertaining curiosity, a thing that happened to the living and not to him, but around Mathias it was pleasant and comforting.

Jove rested his chin on Matty's shoulder, listening carefully. So there was a chance it could still work, but it might take some time, and a bit of conditioning. The pup snorted wryly. If he was going to spend a lot more time in this dress, the wolpertinger would have to come visit him in his room. None of this going out in public looking like a ghoul thing.

Using his friend's shoulder, he managed to get to his feet in spite of the skirts. Perhaps it was time for round two?

Jove leaned down to give Matty's shoulder a reassuring squeeze, and then stepped back into the wolpertinger's line of sight. He watched Mathias very closely the whole time, ready to hop back to blindfold duty if the situation went south. It occurred to the pup that maybe they should head to the forest, or some other quiet, secluded area, there would be less for Mathias to worry about out there. Fewer students to see him if he lost control. Not to mention fewer students to see that cute pink dress.

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[Seussi]

This was much better, though still no less confusing for Mathias. He had confessed...sort of...as much as his broken words and sentences could allow, but it was always so hard for him to tell what Jove thought on the matter. At this point, however, he was beginning to feel content in letting whatever happened..happen. He was happy here, with his friend, his best friend-something he had never had before- snuggled in at his side while they tried to work out his simple and yet so complicated problem. Having Jove so close to him just felt...good. Having him speak, even so fleetingly, gave him great joy. Being told to never like less was a source of great hope, as combinations of strange feelings brewed in his stomach.

But ultimately, he was happy like this. He could have been angry at Jove for what he was doing, but just couldn't be mad when he knew his friend was trying to help. It was an odd way of going about it but...even he understood that there was potential for it to work.

And then Jove was moving away again, and Mathias blinked in surprise. What was he doi----

Oh. Oh goodness. Mathias kept his gaze dropped, and closed his eyes before Jove could stand in front of him again. "Vill look, am just needing a minute." He explained, hissing the words between his teeth. In his head he concentrated, he pictured Jove as he normally knew him to look, in his regular clothes. He had seen the boil with much less, knew that the body beneath that dress was that of a boil, and not a ghoul. He kept that firmly in mind as he raised his head up and, quite slowly, peeked his eyes back open.

It seemed that the preparedness had helped a little. Sure he had to repeat a mantra in his head that Jove was indeed a boil, but at least now he could look at him, let his gaze wander over the way the dress fit on him, rather then only being able to focus on his face.

"Still thinking look very pretty." He said, with a smile. His eyes hadn't glazed over, however, and he still did not look as though he was about to fawn over him and beg for a way to please him. "But seem understanding that you are boil, despite the look. Is easier now. Danke, Jove."

Still, there was an odd warmth that wasn't there before he looked. A tingling sensation at the back of his head, one that threatened to explode into full fruition the longer he looked, and the more his concentration began to slip.

He looked down again. "Is still hard as vell, in vay." He explained, taking a deep and shuddering breath. "But think is vorking."

Grey Dragon

 

[Grey Dragon]

It seemed as though the rosy glow in Jove's cheeks would never go away. Being called 'pretty' shouldn't be that big a deal, especially not while dressed the way he was. His tail wagged against the back of his legs, the usual upwards curl self-conscious and careful. Large, fluffy, foxfire tails were truly not meant for little dresses, if he didn't school himself the curling wag would be a good way to show off what was under the dress. And Jove was not keen for that sort of attention.

The pup's ears perked in concern when Mathias looked down once more. He couldn't explain the anxious pang that went through him, and had to remind himself that it was okay. This was a sign it was working.

He glanced around hesitantly, none of the students on the grounds were paying them any attention, but Jove felt exposed nonetheless. When the wolpertinger looked up next he would see a pale hand outstretched, an invitation to go somewhere... quieter.

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Short before-work tag~