[FIN] Return [ Watch x Rain ]

[Blinded By My Silence]

Home. It was such a strange word. As the Sun Burns hadn't experienced home in so many moons, he'd nearly forgotten what home felt like. After he left for his initial travels, he never thought about it either. No need to.

But now...

Watch was making his way back down the Spring River, walking with his scarlet hooves in the shallows, watching the minnons dart and flash.

Fish are only there once you see them in the light

Was it the same for home too? Had the reason he'd never been homesick been simply that he'd never found this thing called home? Maybe... The buck didn't know. He did know, though, that he missed her deeply, impossibly so. He knew that millions of teeny Persimmon's buzzed in his belly at the thought of seeing her again. Would she remember him? Had she thought about him as often as he had of her? He'd never ask, but he wondered..

His thoughts must have occupied him for longer than he had thought because, when he looked up, the familiar bend in the river stood reversed, waiting, almost beckoning.

He stopped, staring, the wind blowing gently through his mane. The sun had just begun to nestle itself in its watery home, but he needed no guide to lead him now.

He knew where he was.

He was home.  

[space crawfish]

To describe the time after the white buck left as 'difficult' would have been quite charitable. To say they were agonizingly lonely and slow would be more truthful. The moss filled in his footprints and the cool breeze snatched away his scent. If it were not for the weight in her heart, it would be like he had never come at all.

He had not, however, left her with nothing. She didn't notice right away. It was not like there was another doe around to ask. Persimmon's extra fussiness keyed her in that something was different. No, eat this. You work too hard. Sit still, I groom you. As usual, the bug noticed before the Kimeti. The thought of it filled her with apprehension but also a profound sense of joy. Would he be back in time?

Raining Underwater kept herself busy in the meantime. The path, once hidden and overgrown, had been cleared. Weeds had been torn from the ground, low-hanging branches had been wrested from stubborn trees. Smooth stones, carried in-mouth one by one from the river, had been pressed and compacted into the loamy earth. It was now welcoming where it was once was secret, forbidden.

Blinded By Silence

 

[Blinded By My Silence]

Watch stepped forward slowly, the changes that had been made in his absence slowly but surely revealing themselves as drew closer and closer. It was tidier, the forest of briers and vines that had isolated the thicket in which His Lady Rain dwelled. It was wider, more open. Beautiful river-stones were shone in the light of the rising moon.

The home-sick feeling grew stronger and stronger in his chest as he approached. The white buck feared momentarily that his heart may burst with longing. But then, he saw her and instantaneously the pressure dissipated and was replaced with confusion. Was she...?

"...Rain?"  

[space crawfish]

Rain just about jumps out of her hide when she hears another voice. A voice? At this hour? Wait! That voice! Is it?! Ears shoot up and eyes snap all the way open as she turns around, almost tripping over her own tail. Suddenly her view of the river isn't anywhere near as interesting. Doubt that he would return nagged at the edges of her thoughts during the time he was gone. She hated to admit that to herself; it felt like a personal failure. But the doubt was there. But.. the white, the streaks of teal. Flowing water in a clear sky. The mane of the wind-runners on the body of a swamp singer, all kissed with red.

Is it? It is!

She takes in a deep breath and looks at him. Just looks. Stands and stares, really, at the gift the water had brought her. A smile blooms over parted lips.

He came back in time. Her greeting was rich and sweet, low for a doe but good for the head against her chest as she spins stories from the far-away she has never seen.

"Welcome back."

Blinded By Silence

 

[Blinded By My Silence]

The white buck canters up, excitement pulsing through him like adrenaline, his heavy hoof-steps muffled by the carpet of leaves. He slowed as he approached, his hair blowing in the might time breeze. She stood out against the black. The new moonlight danced in her hair, illuminating the white in her fur. She was just as beautiful as when he left, even more so, because as he drew closer, he saw the roundness of her belly and the joy in her eyes.

"It's good to be back." He spoke as he smiled.  

[space crawfish]

She took a few steps forward to meet him and closed the gap with her dark muzzle, rubbing it along the underside of his jaw and along his neck. He's warm. She can feel his pulse and take in his smell but this time it's real. No waking up to find out it was a cruel illusion.

She opened her mouth to speak but then closes it. She was going to tell him that she waited for him and missed him and that he left her a gift, but there's no need to say any of those things. He knows. There's a little tremble to her motion as she leans against him, closing her eyes and taking in a deep breath.

"I'm glad. I'm glad you came back, Watch."

A wave of relief and anxiety, hot and hold, washes over her. What will happen? There's no question in her mind that the soon-to-be clutch is theirs together but... no. Not now. She pushes the questions out of her mind. Not now. Right now he is here and that's all that she wanted.

Blinded By Silence

 

[Blinded By My Silence]

A wonderfully pleasant shiver rings through him, from tip to tail, at this doe's touch. The most amazing feeling, he couldn't deny that. Momentarily, when he had first seen her and her beautifully rounded belly, he wondered if they were his. But as she pressed agianst him, he could feel how she had missed him, her love for him, and that was enough from him to shake the thought away. He sighed happily, nuzzling his back with as much affection as he could muster.


"I thought about you every day I was gone." He whispered then stepped back, beaming at her pregnant state, he added. "Had I known I had this surprise waiting for me, I would have come back faster! You look beautiful, my lady."  

[space crawfish]

The insides of her dark ears turn just a bit pink with the compliment. He's such a gentleman. Ah, a doe could be spoiled rotten by this!

".... I... didn't know for a while. Persimmon noticed before I did. This is my first time.. so..." Her voice trails off and her eyes turn away, but she still smiles a little. The admission feels a little... embarrassing. Surely a buck is not an alien creature to her (perhaps they are her favorite creature), but she's never caught before now. He's so well traveled, has had so many experiences, but he came back to see a doe who didn't even know she was pregnant. She feels like a silly filly.

Oh! But he is here now! She perks up and looks over at him again, up and down. He looks more... solid than he did. Muscles are more finely tuned, footfalls are more confident. There's something stronger about him, something solid and capable way that is only earned through journeying. By the Crane's feathers he is a handsome buck. Rain catches herself staring, and her inner ears flush once again. How rude of her! But, it is so hard not to admire. "... your travels have sculpted you. It's quite a fetching look."

She settles down, carefully, on the large stone by the river. A familiar place, still warm from the heat of the day. A black hoof dangles lazily into the cool water. With a sweep of her tail, she invites him to join her.

"You must have traveled a long way. Were you able to see the ocean?" She smiles and leans her head back, watching him in the moonlight.

Blinded By Silence

 

[Blinded By My Silence]

The white buck smiles and settles down next to her, eyeing the beautiful die over with his deep wine-red eyes. She was a beautiful as ever, even more so, he thought, seeing her glow with happiness.

"And motherhood has filled you with the most beautiful glow I have ever witnessed, my dear." He pressed closer to her, beaming, "Better than the ocean, even. After moons and moons of hard traveling, crossing briar-infested swampland, gater-laden bogs, I found the plains in which my ancestors ran. I paid visit to those I could find, and sent a blessing to the Motherfather for those I could not. From there the river flowed through, yes through, a vast desert, where sand rose and fell like waves, the only source of water for ages. Finally, the sun was stolen by the most amazing thing I have yet to see; Mountains dressed in frozen ice and fierce snow. From one of them, water poured. I found where the Ocean comes from, it's beginning." Watch sighed happily, "Of course, I still have much, much more to see.

space crawfish

 

[space crawfish]

Rain cast her gaze down and listened carefully. Her mind's eye wandered to all of the places her real eyes have not seen. There was something magical about it. In his absence, she thought many times about the river. How many shores does she kiss? How many fish swim in her underwater groves? How tall are the mountains that birth her and how deep are the valleys that caress her? Where does she lay out her last breath when her body melts into the cold, deep, endless ocean?

"I..."

The words are directed inward and not outward. Indecision tugs at the edges of her mind. Should she? This place is safe. Comfortable. Days turn into days turn into days, following one another endlessly as the moon tirelessly chases the sun. But...

"... I was going to leave this clutch in the cradle of the Motherfather, just as my own mother left me. This land is merciful and good." Her eyes fall to the ripples and eddies in the water. It's mesmerizing. This next part is difficult. She chews on her lower lip, debating whether to say it or not. Her hesitation hangs in the air, heavy and expectant.

"... after that... I want to see all of these things. The desert and the mountain and the plain. I want to see where the river begins and ends and all of the places in between. This land is good but it is all I have known."

Again she pauses and finally looks over at her pale companion. Worried? Yes. Afraid? Yes. What will he say? Is it stupid for her, a doe who has lived her whole life in this grove, to wish for such fantastic things? Perhaps it is a filly's dream.

Blinded By Silence

 

[Blinded By My Silence]

Something flickered in Watch's deep red eyes as she spoke. Anger? Perhaps. Disappointment? More than likely. Hurt? Oh yes. He didn't understand, didn't she want to raise her children? Their children? The flicker dulled as he realized that it was up to him, really, to keep them together. He sighed and stood.

"Well," He began, "You know how us story-tellers work. I offer you a bargain, an opportunity for a cost. I am not leaving until those children are grown. You can go and travel alone with no guide but the river, as I have done. Or you can stay here with me, watch our children grow and help me teach them nature's way, and, once they've gone their separate ways, you and I will leave together." He held her gaze strongly. He refused to be his father. He would never abandon his children, even if it meant losing their mother. There was nothing she could do to change that either. The ball was in her court now.

space crawfish

 

[space crawfish]

She's taken aback by his sudden change of tone. Dark brows come together, outlined against her white. He seems so... angry? Something is wrong. She wasn't raised by a kin. Her parents... who knows where they are or if they are even still alive. It has never crossed her mind that she has somehow been deprived by not knowing them or whatever clutchmates she may have had. Is there something wrong with it? Part of her feels insulted. She looks back out over the river. Her tone has changed, too. Quiet. Cooler. More formal and less familiar.

"I did not realize you felt this strongly about it."

His mood changed so fast... has she made a terrible mistake? She inwardly bristles; is he trying to manipulate her into this? He knows she won't go by herself. It is not so much the options that she dislikes, but being forced into an imaginary corner is what unsettles her. There's a third option he didn't mention, one that exists outside of his rigid dichotomy. They stay together temporarily and then part ways. Rain keeps it to herself; there's no need to say it. She takes in a deep breath.

"... some storytellers take first-hatched foal as payment. This is true. It is ah... implied... that some devour what they take. Zikwa, in these stories. Personally..." She regards him carefully with her firefly eyes, bright at night. "... I don't think any of the Motherfather's children would do anything as abhorrent. Your cost is but a pittance compared to theirs."

Dark limbs and tail are drawn around a pale body. She's not interested in playing games, at least not ones like this. A long breath escapes from her body as she looks back over the water. The elation from before has evaporated.

"You have your deal."

Blinded By Silence

 

[Blinded By My Silence]

The tall white buck watched her demeanor change and, with a deep sigh, he settled back down next to her. He'd been too harsh, he realized.

"I...I apologize, that was too rough, I suppose... I do not wish for you to feel trapped. I just want you to know where I stand. I do feel very strongly about this." His ears lowered apologetically, but his eyes were still firm, "Perhaps it is different for those like you who never knew their parents, but for me, knowing that I was abandoned..." He looked away, "I hated my father for it. I still do. I don't want our children to feel such things. Not when I can do everything that I can for them."

Watch let his tail brush hers gently, hesitantly. He did not want her to feel such things towards him either. He spoke softly.

"Do what feels right for you, my lady."

space crawfish

 

[space crawfish]

The doe watches him carefully. Looks, but does not touch. Not yet. When his weight settles back down next to her, she does not move. A part of her wants to, far far away from here. Away from him. But she stays and listens.

His feelings of loss and anger are... a bit difficult for her. When he speaks, she can feel the hatred still burning hot in his voice. It is a heavy burden to carry, even for the strong shoulders of a grown buck. She never thought about a parent, or even two parents, leaving a clutch as abandonment before. Is it? No, but...

Abandoned.... She leans her head back to look into the dark crown of the old tree. Hidden within a labyrinthine nest sleeps a queen without an heir. Her open eyes catch the moonlight, bur Rain knows she is sleeping. A whole palace, empty.

"The first face I have a memory of... it was a beautiful face. Black like darkest night. Yellow like spring flowers. She brought me fruit, I remember. Persimmons, soft and ripe. It took me a long time to realize that she was not a Kimeti." A bittersweet smile crosses her face, tinged with pity for both the buck and the insect. "Perhaps I do have a parent, one six legs instead of four."

"... I am sorry that your sire made the choice that he did." She lets out a breath, a release of pressure. Her body relaxes. When his tail touches hers, she does not pull away. Does it push back ever so slightly? The movement is so gentle that it's hard to tell. "I... don't want any children that I have to feel that way about their parents. It's a terrible thing."

The doe glances over at him. There's a reserved certainty to her movement. Eyes linger for the space between heartbeats before turning back to the water. Her choice is made. She does not move.

Blinded By Silence

 

[Blinded By My Silence]

Watch sighs in relief as the tension breaks. It was an uncomfortable feeling, having her mad at him. Very unpleasent, he'd rather that not happen again. The white buck gives her a gentle smile.

"So, you'll stay?"

space crawfish

Fail post is fail. x_x